TTC for 10+ months, part 5

[MuddyWellyNelly]

Filled up our old one, I'll put our updated list on a separate post so that it's not a huge chunk of text at the top of every page.

Old thread here. Newbies always welcome, much as we'd like to hope nobody ever gets to this stage of TTC!

Ladies -sorry for being awol. Not on the slopes yet (this coming weekend, yay!) but been very busy including booking our wedding.

Just wanted to quickly say boo to lemon breaking your collar bone, hope you are feeling in a bit less pain as the drugs kick in. Co-codamol is to be recommended! (Did I put that on a previous post as well? If so, I probably sound like a junkie).

Hooray for a lovely romantic Husband pout. I'll make a guess at the shit part, but the most important thing is that you now have a lovely husband who knew how to make it all better.

And I am sniggering at euro - "I just make him do me anyway" .

Hello to newbies too. Hang out with us for some good company and inane chat while we ponder our tumblewombs.

About 7DPO here and am defiantly drinking wine. I expect the usual spotting to start, ooh approximately our first days skiing which will be lovely. But at least I can imbibe all the wine the Chalet can offer .

Must go - tired. Hello to everyone else and sorry for no real namechecking.

and wave, pls post loads - got nothing better to do!

me neither lemon I should be marking a load of essays today but I'm still in bed having kept both of us awake for most of the night with a hacking cough. Glamourous!I think the biscuit alert when we are in need of chat is very handy! I hope you've got good stuff for the pain.

Big wave to nelly hope the wedding plans are shaping up nicely.

The cold has not been a deterrent euro! Bt I've had post ov temps for 4 days now and I'm only on cd11. I think this month is most likely a duff. Pah. Are you super ov again?

I've got loads of stuff to read, which I can and should do, but turning pages is awkward as well... Sorry about your cough and the essays and the duff cyclr. But could the high temps not be your cold?

I think it is the cold. But I wonder what that means in terms of ovulating? Last time this happened I had a six week cycle. How depressing I've been charting long enough to remember! How long will you be out of action?

awww, lemons you poor little citrus fruit. I hope you're not in too much pain. Sending you lot of , and . How long will it take to recover?

nelly very jealous that you're going skiing this weekend, I wish I could go back!

wine hope your mri scan comes through soon, waiting is just awful.

kitty I think low GI should go out the window during AF. Chocolate and cake all the way.

lisa I'm so sorry the Dr was rude and mean. Can you complain about her?

Welcome back mrspout Congratulations!!!!!

I am not going to work out how much I've spent on vitamins. DH is on really expensive ones recommended by the urologist. They cost close to 70GBP for 3 month supply And there's the ones I take. I've been buying them for 2 years now, gulp. I've never been someone to worry about money before. We've always earned enough to live on and be comfortable and have nice holidays and luxuries. I never understood people who saved for a rainy day. But now I totally understand it because ivf is going to cost us thousands and we don't have the money sitting in the bank. I feel quite angry that it is going to cost us so much to get what others take for granted. We will be skint by the time I ever do get pregnant and I feel very jealous of people who don't have to spend money to have a baby.

On the subject of that thread, there really is a touch of "go hang out away from us in case infertility is catching". I've come to realise that whereas with other things (illness, debt, bereavement, divorce etc) people can think that one day it might be them so are able to empathise but if you already have children you know it won't affect you so infertility is not something you empathise with. I've noticed that overall on mn there is not a lot of empathy for infertile couples. There have been threads on ivf where most people say it shouldn't be on the nhs, and there was also a thread about how children born through ivf are no more special. Running through all of these is a current of complete non understanding of what this is really like.

Our washing machine broke down on Saturday and now the dishwasher is playing up. My car is in for a service which I know is going to be expensive. I feel like the world is conspiring against me! Oh, and I spent ages cooking MrDen a special dinner and managed to burn it. Although it tasted ok when I scraped the burnt bits off. And he said it was lovely.

nelly skiing and wedding planning? How lovely. We are currently trying to book up a holiday for next month as it is probably the last time before late September that we can both get time off together! We need to stop dithering and just get on with it!

mrsd I know what you mean about the lack of sympathy for subfertility. The comments following any news article about fertility always sadden me. Why do people have to be so nasty about wanting something they have themselves?

wine I am sure it will be the cold that is throwing your temps out.

Hi all, I'm also a LTTC (ttc #1 nearly 4.5 yrs so far), and sometimes lurk here and there on the threads. I've just been reading that some of you are into acu / herbs / diet changes etc, and I've been trying all things woo for the last 6 months or so. I've got quite into guided meditations and found them really good for helping to relax and release some of the tension i tend to feel in my uterus area. I'm also hoping that by lowering cortisol levels its having some kind of biological improvement? who knows. Anyway, I've amassed quite a collection of these now by different people, some directly for fertility and others not, and for a different reason i happen to have 50 blank cds. So i was wondering if any of you who don't have a problem with copyright fancy a free copy of the best of them? Just in a 'passing things around between ladies who understand each other' kind of way? You'd probably need to PM me somewhere to post it to. Who knows maybe they help produce a boy or girl baby ! (couldn't resist).

x
PS - the content of some of them is very woo, but if you don't pay too literal attention they're still bizarrely relaxing!

lemon i hope you feel better soon x

mrsden sorry you are feeling like this, big hugs x I have mentioned that it was not a good appointment to the midwife so i'm waiting for her to get back to me. I cannot believe that the stupid thread is still going, but you have to wonder about some people (grin)

Afternoon everyone. I got in work late this morning, due to a little valentines day excess, so I've not really updated today. Got a quiet patch in work though, so a quick post.

I did another test yesterday, which was a BFN, so I'm now just waiting for my HSG tomorrow. I want these results, ASAP! I wonder how long it'll take for a follow up consultant appointment, and if I should phone and make one, or if they will. He originally said it would be 3 months waiting for the HSG appointment, and it's only been just over 1 month. I hope he doesn't make me wait 2 more months for a follow up!

I'm actually quite excited about it. Even if it's bad news I just want to know.

Sorry not to name check, I should get back to some work really. I've got tomorrow off, so will hopefully catch up properly then.

mrsden sometimes it hits me that my friends have paid nothing to get pregnant and it could cost us the earth. It's a sting but I guess in the end, it will be forgotten about and so worth it. If someone said to me now, pay £30k and there will be a healthy pregnancy for you, I'd find it, somehow (fundraising!!? Remortgage? begging?!!). it's the no guarantee that feels concerning. A bit like gambling.

care bear a very kind gesture. I have pmd you.

I still keep thinking about that bloody thread. It has given me the grumps! (autocorrect that to trumps then - ha!)

Stasi you should be able to see the results immediately. I could see the screen during mine and thought I could see fluid coming out but got the woman doing the procedure to talk me through what I was looking at and she was happy to. I think that is pretty normal from what I have seen here and on other fora. Of course, you will get the official notification from your next appointment but you shouldn't have to wait to get the unofficial view.

carebare thanks for the offer but that is probably a bit too woo for me!

Bear not bare!

Thank you for the congratulations, you gals are so lurvely!

Lemons you sound really fed up. If I knew you in RL I'd pop round and read Hello magazine some books out to you, I'd do all the voices too

lisa I'm really angry on your behalf about how you were made to feel so bad. You are going through an awful time and a little empathy should have been afforded to you. I agree with you when you talk about humiliation and feeling belittled. They are exactly the emotions that sum it all up. I have never been made to feel so belittled by practically every professional we have seen in this field. I come out of appointments feeling almost ashamed and silly. All in all I think the whole thing, the infertility and attitude of the professionals, really has affected my self esteem. I have noticed that my self confidence has nose dived. It's stupid things like having no faith in my judgement or confidence in any decisions I make or things I do, even the little things that I know I am good at normally. Not nice.

kitty It must be tough coming to terms with your referral. I remember feeling shocked when we were advised to have private IVF. I couldn't believe that something so alien was in my reality.
Hoping that your AF has eased off today. AF's are cak without being heavy and painful to boot.

wine I hate having to worry about outing myself and sometimes forget that this forum is plastered all over t'internet. It's a shame that there has to be an element of guardedness because I see you all as friends. joycep I will be absolutely horrified if someone even mentions anything vaguely fishy or trouty around me

mrsd Sorry to hear that you are having a spate of domestic breakdowns. Things like that always seem to happen at once - makes me glad to rent I suppose though getting things fixed by our agents is a right PITA. They sent somebody to fix our oven recently, he was here for over 6 hours and all he suceeded in doing was to replace the wrong part and break the smaller oven too.
I don't know the thread you are referring to but it doesn't sound like one I should have a look at. I think that there is an element of smugness on the part of some women who have babies over the issue of infertility. I especially hate the line trotted out by people that women have no right to have a baby or the classic of how it is a woman's fault for leaving it too late to find the right man and financial security. I hadn't looked at it like there is a fear of infertility "catching", it just seemed to me that nobody wants to discuss it with you or even acknowledge the pain of it, I hadn't really considered why. During our wedding lunch round the table my MIL bought out an A4 SIZED, I kid you not photo of her baby great niece. I was gobsmacked considering she knows our situation. You think by telling people they might show a little consideration towards your feelings about babies and related stuff but evidently not.

nelly Exciting times booking your wedding. When is it going to be?

euro a holiday sounds like an excellent plan before you start treatment. It should be provided on the NHS so you are nice and relaxed before treatment starts. Though I remember how when I had a "proper job" it was a nightmare booking a holiday because I used to work my arse off getting my cases ready to hand over to somebody else to manage and then when I came back I had two weeks work waiting for me!

carebear it is really sweet of you to come on and share your experiences. I am sorry that you have been trying for so long. Your offer is really so thoughtful. Unfortunately I won't be able to try your "woo" much as I would like to because our stereo is out of action owing to the fact that somebody who may be me, blew the speakers when I was making the most of our neighbours being on holiday

Big waves to everybody I've missed and hi to ladygee

pout I forgot to say earlier that my ewcm stops the day before ovulation. So on the actual day of ovulation I never see ewcm.

carebear that is really kind of you. But I'm not really a woo person (yet!)

Where are you thinking of going on holiday euro?

stasi I've found that the conception vitamins make my cycles shorter and ovulation earlier. But that is good for me because otherwise my cycles are 35 days but with the vits they are between 27-31. So, they must do something. A side benefit of them is that I'm sure my nails and hair are better since taking them. I have long nails for the first time ever and I've had quite a few people say my hair looks glossy and thick and shiny which no one has ever said to me before Good luck for the hsg. I know I'll need to have one before I start ivf so I'd be interested to hear all about it.

lisa at least the nurse was nice, I bet she thinks the Dr is a right cow but can't say anything. It's not fair that we have to go through all this stuff and then have to put up with being treated nastily by professionals.

pout I know what you mean about thinking of us all on this thread as friends. I do feel like I know you all, and I forget that this isn't a private chat. When we all have our babies we really should arrange to meet up. Being outed would be awful, I reckon a few of my UK friends with babies probably mumsnet but I doubt they come on the conception boards. I do worry that I might say something that would give myself away.

pout thank you, I feel I am unable to judge anything, not even the time to dtd anymore. Its silly I have cbfm to tell me!! I'll have to wait and see what happens with it all, I just couldn't make her understand how stressful all this is and that I won't be happy till i'm pregnant, then I'll have other things to worry about. The midwives at St Helier have all been kind to me over the past few months

evening all

I keep coming on and half writing a post and then work intervenes and I lose it all! Pesky work.

Sorry I've not kept up with the thread.

carebear that is a lovely offer, thank you. I have been thinking that some kind of meditation/"enforced" relaxation might be what I need, as I'm a pretty tense sort of person and that can't be helping with the ttc. So I may well PM you my address! Even if they are a bit woo, a good giggle at them might be what I need... !

LadyKB welcome! Your story sounds similar to mine... long term pill user, acne, started ttcing in may 2011 and now found out I have PCOS.

I think the main thing with PCOS is working out whether, and when, you are ovulating. So, hope you get a more reliable progesterone result next time. I have to have another progesterone test this month too so we will be in parallel!

Stasi best of luck for the HSG tomorrow. hurrah for the valentines day excess, sounds fun. DH and I are such old marrieds that we managed to get each other the same card!

pout congratulations! your descriptions of newly wed life made me smile. Oh and like mrsden I also find EWCM (the little I get) stops the day before ovulation. So you could be in with a shot?

lemons I hope your collarbone is mending swiftly! OUCH poor poor you. Hopefully at least it means you are getting a break from work

mrsden I know what you mean about the attitude of those who got pg easily. There does seem to be a big divide. It seems as if some of those who get pg easily just can't empathise. I've also seen lots of women boasting/stealth boasting of their fertility - as if it's a talent and those of us who find it less easy are somehow less gifted than them. Rant over!

wine hope the cough is better and you get more sleep tonight. I recommend a hot steamy bath to clear things out?

sorry and waves to those I have missed!

I went for my first acupuncture session yesterday. Not sure what to make of it so far...

minipie where did he stick the needles??? I'm into my 3rd week of it all. He's sorting out my migraines too so he puts some in my head, some in my stomach and some on the inside of my knee and thigh, he hooks up an electrical current. Then he puts those cups on my stomach, give me a head massage and then burns this funny looking thing like a cigar over my stomach. Oh and then there are herbs to drink. I'm getting used to it all now but it is strange when you first start

anyone else having acupuncture??

Evening everyone!

Well it's CD27 today, still waiting but hoping AF will be in the next couple of days.
Now that IVF is imminent I've been having a bit of a wobble today. I keep thinking about the chances of it not working and if it does work, the chance of it ending in a mc I know I've just got to think positive!

ladygee how's the stunning going? Do you know how many follicles are developing yet?

stasi good luck with the HSG tomorrow

*stimming

Hi everyone. Carebear i like the sound of those cds but i cant seem to PM you! I'm feeling much better after the sickness bug. No sign of my back improving and clomid doesnt seem to have done anything for us, im on cd 18 or something but no sign of ov!

lisa I've been having acu since last April. I am not pg yet (of course) but I do feel that it has improved my cycles. They are more consistent, less clotty, with a longer luteal phase. I originally said to myself I would give it a go for 6 months and then stop, but I am sticking with it because I do feel it is having a positive effect. (Although it is not having the main positive effect I want of a BFP!)

Evening all! Am posting on my phone on way home so apologies for typos & crap responding to everyone!

mrs pout Congrats!! Am so pleased to hear the wedding went well and you are now all luuurrrved up. Enjoy that lovely newly wed feeling :)

lisa So sorry to hear about the bitch doctor. That really is the last thing you need. Do you have to see her again? Was she actually able to give you any answers. Hope you are feeling a bit better now.

wine Hope you are feeling less coldy! Boo to the marking.

Am super jealous of your skiing trip nelly. Have a great time and enjoy the après ski.

mrsd Garghh, when I think about how much we've spent on ttc - vitamins, CBFM, pee sticks etc etc. And that's before we've even started the ivf! It all seems particularly unfair as DH and I do jobs we love but that are badly paid and our stupid pct won't fund any ivf.

stasi good luck with the hsg tomorrow. Let us know how it goes!

Anyone know if you need a hsg if you're having ivf? I'd assumed not as the tubes don't really come into it. Am hoping not anyway, as I have an irrational fear of it!

minipie and lisa the acupuncture actually sounds a bit scary (I am just a big wuss..) but I know some people find it very relaxing. Gossip girl and chocolate is probably more my thing, though not v good for me!

fatima Not long to go now! No more wobbles, just think of it as a step closer to getting your baby. ladyg hope all is still going well with you.

Hi to euro, kitty and everyone else I've missed ie on the previous page..

My word, that other thread went some! I had a read after kitty said she went in (well done btw- v calm and measured response). The thread actually quite amused me in its stupidity and bitchiness! Did consider offering to take the lady's baby if it turned out to be another girl

izzy glad you're feeling better. Sucks about the missing ov though, maybe it'll be a late one?

gin I haven't needed to hae a HSG. The doctor said it looked pretty obvious that the issue was from DH sperm and as all my other results are fine and they collect the eggs themselves. So there was no need to. But if I feel I want one, I can.

My cold is back with a vengeance. I had a rubbish nights sleep and I'm so bunged up and grotty. I suppose it gives me something else to think about.