The all new rat smacketers thread, this way for a 2012 BFP we are BROOKING NO ARGUMENT

[farfallarocks]

Just wrote a blardy long message before getting the 'thread full' message so here we go.................

Has something happened to little (desperately hoping she's ok, poor love)?

Off to docs. Then interview to run the world a charitable trust.

Far I am glad you managed to have a chat about it this morning. At least you know he definitely wants a baby I can't imagine how hard it must be for both you and your DH with respect to the performance issues. It must be frustrating as well. The only trouble I have with my DH is that he is always tired. He could fall asleep standing up which is why sex is always a cert at the weekends, just not always during the week.

Biscuits that was very interesting. It's amazing the gadgets you can get now to help with TTC. I half wonder though that if none of this was available, whether it would make TTC less/more stressfuol

Smegs, Little had an mc this week ( I hope you don't mind me saying this Little). We are all thinking of you Little

I too am looking forward to January being over. Then it's DH's birthday and Valentine's day! Whoop. DH has asked me if we can do some baking together this weekend (as if I would ever turn down that offer!). But in reality what this involves, is DH deciding what he would like to eat, me baking it, him pouring the wine, and then him eating the results Though I see this as a win-win all round!

Where's Imps?

Bean and pop I didn't mean to miss you out, my bloody MN didn't show your posts!

Good luck with the interview Bean

Pop Boots is a dangerous place, as I can somehow justify in my head that it is ok to buy everything in the shop

Far I am glad you have had a talk - it sounds like you need to keep talking to get past this. I know you feel like you're having to shoulder a lot of the TTC burden (I do too) but I do agree with others that you should definitely keep the details of your cycle a secret. I know you try to do this anyway, but what you said about him psyching himself up in the bathroom before bed thinking about babies is probably not going to get most men going! I'm sure they are a delicate species and instead need to think about their hot wife rather than why they are shagging (ie making babies!). I quite liked the suggestions from Imps and Smegs about letting them know re fertile days and then the DH has to do the seducing if and when they're in the mood. Alternatively, I take the approach of not saying anything about when I'm fertile (God knows if he even understands re ovulation and luteal phase etc!) and just either seduce myself or hope he will on the right days. Obviously this is a bit hit and miss and luckily DH doesn't have the same anxieties as yours, but I'm sure that if I adopted a Biscuits-like approach (sorry Biscuits!) I'm sure he would refuse to shag me and we would have a massive row. Different things work for different people! I like all the suggestions about having a regular date night, making more time for yourselves and as a couple and maybe going back to sex when you both feel like it rather than SWI. It might do both of you some good, but I totally understand your frustration in wanting to just blooming well get (and stay) pregnant. Me too. (HUG)

Bean you go girl! You give that doctor what for and then get on with saving the world!

Popcorn I love Boots - I go most lunchtimes and always buy myself little treats!

Maybe I'll be glad when January's over too (even though it is my birthday very soon). I saw some snowdrops today and thought that spring must be coming quite soon.

Just popping in - will catch up and post properly.

Maybe - Imps is en vacance I belive shaggin DH senseless. Hopefully she'll return home with a baby called Pina Colada.

Thanks for telling me, Maybe. I just popped over to the ante-natal thread. I'm so very sad for her.

I feel I should point out that that isn't my usual seduction technique it was definitely desperate measures and certainly wouldn't expect it to work for most people! I think we were just both so fed up with it all.

And we did have to factor in the fertile window dictated by our monitor (see my essay below) - if we didn't SWI in the window the money back thing was off..... Mind you how they would have checked I'm not entirely sure....

Biscuits there is this amazing invention called lying you know...

Oh Biscuits I know - I hope I didn't offend.

No offence at all Generic my lovely

I've read about this smegs but I don't think it'll catch on.... Besides, it was in my interests to get DH to SWI so if he doesn't think of making it up, I'm not going to suggest it

Oh my, I'm watching the fabulous baker brothers from last night. There is an amazing looking chocolate cake / chocolate pot recipe (apparently you can use ramekins for cooking? Who knew....) and some delish Eggs Benedict with spinach muffins - yummy

I might marry the older brother just for his kitchen aid - is that wrong?

You can keep the kitchenaid if I can keep the older brother? :o

Perhaps we could share him? I don't want the younger one because he keeps going on about how old and over the hill the old one is and he's the same age as me

Or perhaps I could have him to cook me lunch while you're at work and then I'll send him home in time to get your dinner on?

Looks like the ov bleed theory was a bit hopeful. Lots of pink cm today and I'm only 3dpo per FF. arse and .

Brookers, what a strange day.

I'm afraid to my shame I didn't make the interview because my doc's appointment ran over by an hour but I wasn't willing to give it up.

FINALLY - a breakthrough. My progesterone levels are good. I am definitely ovulating. I was instantly referred for a HCG (?) at King's. No argument! Phew. And - and this is horrible instance of being right but wishing I wasn't - DP has motility issues back from SA. He is not going to like these results as he was dead confident that his two glasses of wine a night are fine and that his wrigglers were fine. At least his count is good, apparently.

I am going to leave it to the doc to deliver a sermon on lifestyle. And feel sorry for DP, but possibly maybe there's a slither of hope.

Biscuits - sounds a bit like your story? But your DH doesn't even drink is that right?

I don't know how DP will give up booze. I've spent this last year taking control of my fertility and wishing he would but it's been fruitless and I love him to bits and I know how much he loves his glass.

Maybe just go straight down the IUI route, save him the hassle! Not that this is likely to work of course.

Advice welcome.

Sorry - will now read all your news.

Oh Scrambled - utterly pissed off for you. x

Oh Bean that is difficult isn't it. In a way it's nice to know what the problem might be, but then there's still no magic fix for if.

You're right my DH had low motility in his first sample. He doesn't drink a lot of alcohol at all really, or smoke, or wear tight pants. But he did drink a lot of Pepsi. So he totally gave up pepsi and started taking wellman conception vits. 3 mths on and he got a normal sample.

But they also say how one sample can be an odd result. And I recall DH saying it was hard to catch that very first but, which they emphasise you have to get (sorry TMI). Maybe he was better at getting the sample the second time? Good that you're getting the HSG done too as that can clear out any sludge or anything in the tubes.

Does your DH take any vits at the mo? And how long will you have to wait for your HSG?

Oh bean I'm sorry to hear about DHs results. Was the Dr confident he could improve them by drinking less? (that's a silver lining, at least??)
I think I may find myself in your boat in 6 months if I'm honest; DH drinks twice a week but really goes to town when he does. At least he's cut down on caffeine

Will you get another interview do you think? Though you weren't that keen anyway were you? :o

smegs have you had any investigations done, other than your thyroid bloods?

Thanks Pop and Biscuits

DP has been on manvits and Chinese herbs for a couple of months when he got this result. I think we could tackle it with no booze and he even offered to try acupuncture but he may dig his heels in as may feel hurt.

We should test again, but we will have an app' at fertility clinic in 2 months.

At least we have something to work on instead of me doing everything under the sun to get pg.

Smegs - hope you get some answers. Will you go to doc?

Bean will DH gave to go to the doc to get the results / lifestyle lecture? I'm sure if he just cut down a bit that would help wouldn't it? A couple if glasses every night could be cut down a fair bit without cutting it out totally?

Just remind him if it works you'll be giving up booze for 9 mths plus!

Hello ladies,

Well 18.1.2012 is officially over and 19.1.2012 is looking slightly better no?

I'm glad that things are looking slightly brighter today for the smacketeers.

Maybe, date night sounds like a fab idea, life can be so damn busy and it's important to have a bit of quality time sometimes and remember why you fell in love in the first place. DH and I try and do that too although it's not very regular unfortunately.

I can't really offer any different advice than the other ladies have already given far but at least you have had a proper discussion about it now. I'm pretty sure if you concentrate on SFF at the weekends then that might ignite a flame so that DH fancies the occasional SFF in the week too. And actually if sperm can live for 5 days then there's every chance that weekend shagging could cover most of the week in terms of ovulation so a BFP is still possible. I am in the Biscuits school of seduction, poor DH is told that he needs to shag me well in advance whether he fancies it or not - fortunately after 2.8 years of trying for DC2 he is pretty resolved to it and we can have a laugh about "doing our duty", we often joke about TTC being about sheer determination and bloody mindedness in the face of adversity rather than some romantic liasion! I am sure it will all work out - for all of us I hope!

Bean Doctors appt sounds very postive, I hope DH comes on board with reducing the a bit for TTC. HSGs are magic too so it won't be long now until little bean #2 is made

Smegs still not convinced that its AF but it does sounds odd, what CD are you on?

Waves to Shiny, Pops, Generic, Beedle, Imps, Musical and all the other rat smacketeers that my sieve like memory has forgotten

I am suddenly feeling a bit down and panicky ladies I am probably just hungry, almost time for din-dins

We all know the "whoops I'm pregnant" brigade is thriving alive and well, while the only others I've met two irl (plus the majority of MN conception) seem to be longer-term ttc'ers - and there's not too many who fall inbetween, i.e. people who get pg at, like, 9-15 months.

I suppose I am getting my head around the fact that medical intervention may lie in our futures. I feel a bit of a failiure if I'm honest, though I know it's totally and completely untrue and irrational. And while I'm happy to wait til the summer for any kind of check up, I'm also fairly confident we will actually need to make that appointment, iykwim. And it sucks bum.

Ok, wobble of the day over, thank you for tolerating my whinge listening :)

PS - I could be making that 2nd para up. Maybe I'm seeing what I want to / expect to /worry about seeing and it's totally untrue? I'd love to see stats on what month ttc people fall pg on, but I just have a hunch they'll all be at the lower end of the scale??

I'm also freaking a bit because I have no obvious problems. I'm only 27, have regularish periods, ovulate every time... Like, if I knew it was PCOS at least I'd know I could try clomid, you know?

It's been a while so just popping my head in to see who will be joining us soon. Lots of lovely pregnant looking ladies over here, just need that confirmation :)