Woohoo for MsEl (you gonna stay christmassy forever or what? And loving the miniJaffa link however long it took you!) and Jaffa! I too got my bfp very shortly before my due date - was a very confusing time. Mostly I was in denial that I was even pregnant but I made a 'show' of honouring Teddy and we went to the garden centre to buy a peace lily. It was strange, but YES, YES the the thing moomin mentions about how our babies don't exist in the real world but are very much part of our lives - it bought him physically into my life, kinda. I look at the plant many times a day - it's in my line of sight - and mostly I don't think 'that's Teddy's lily' but maybe once every few days I do. And it's so comforting. Perhaps the fact it's a plant, that is living, is also significant. I dunno. But consider doing something similar, marking the day somehow. There's enough denial and secrecy around miscarriage. It's NOT a dirty secret and we shouldn't feel we need to 'forget and move on'. I think it's far healthier to remember and move on.
In a similar vein re: telling people. Of course we're all different. So, newton deciding telling all early is better for you is probably what is better for you - so do it! If moving the goalposts constantly is where you find yourself, that probably best for you, too, pie and so on...
But something that sticks in my mind is I had to attend a family wedding about four weeks after my loss. I found myself worrying that I was going to be asked about the loss/sympathies expressed which I thought would upset me, or it being ignored completely (you soon realise many people are uncomfortable talking about 'it') which I thought might upset me more! Your classic lose/lose situation! So, I went to the GRIP shop, got myself a big one and figured that I CAN'T worry about everyone else's response and how it makes them feel - it might make them uncomfortable and/or sad for while but it was me who was really having to process the thing. If, for whatever reason a person needed to withdraw from me and ignore it, that would be ok. And if someone wanted to be sympathetic that would be ok too. In the event, I had one comment of 'when will you have another' from someone who didn't even know what had happened as I walked DS2 on the lawn (that stung a bit. Wanted to say 'actually... ) and I spontaneously started talking about it to DF's sister whom I was sat next to at the table. Anyone else find that? That you would suddenly blurt about your loss to either strangers, or people you hadn't seen for ages that you bump into in the supermarket... or was that just me? 
I'm naturally a private person and it took me by surprise that I would suddenly OVERshare!
This time, we haven't told many people at all. I can't even rationalise why, exactly... I am not really consciously thinking something bad will happen, I don't think. Really, just getting through the days. It's working for me.
Wow. Ramble much?
martha, you twit, just snap them in half!
maja Good to hear you're feeling better! Now my fingers are crossed for the upwards and onwards trend to continue.
Well! I'm never, NEVER going to Germany again! never say never, Manda... you know from experience it often bites you on the bottom Our trip was kinda akin to National Lampoons Vacation - the journey which should have been fairly straight forward and take around four/five hours door to door ended up taking ten starting woth the flight delayed for an hour - not so bad, but not great with a toddler in tow (and with a 40 euro fine for us sitting in the wrong seats on one of the german trains - when the conductor told us we were obviously sorry and said we'd move but she was abrubt to the point of rudeness - it is too late you must pay 40 euro. How the heck we were supposed to know we weren't to sit there when we didn't speak German and there were no English signs I don't know.
Then we got to the hotel/themepark resort, finally, and the girls went off in whilst DF and I went to the room had great sex - hightlight of the weekend! got DS2 to sleep and, had a little rest . Then when I was perusing all the booklets on the desk (in german naturally) it appeared that half the park, including ALL the big rides we had specifically bought the girls for being that's what they love, were closed for the winter season. Which was NOT mentioned anywhere on the website. I couldn't bear to tell them until the next day, definitely not when they arrived back to the room (nice, but no mini bar, safe, kettle/coffee machine - in a 4star superior hotel? V. basic) and said 'lots of the rides are closed but that's probably because it's dark and the park is almost due to close...' Argh! I didn't go to the spa as the two nights/park tickets and travel was already costing £1500 and I just didn't want to give them another penny when I felt we'd been swizzed (treatments expensive). The bloody 40 euro fine en route didn't help that feeling! The girls fell asleep by 8pm as we were so shattered - we were up at 4.20am to get there - but DS2 was like a child possessed and wouldn't sleep until gone 11pm (DF took him eventually and walked him in his buggy for an hour around the hotel to get him to sleep whilst we both had multiple thoughts/comments about 'ok it's going wrong, it's cost a fortune, but we can still have a good time, right?) Saturday was bitterly cold, the park was... not good. As I said, exciting stuff non exsistant for the girls, the kiddy rides mostly too old for DS2, we were all tired still and grumpy. Gave up on that come the afternoon and went swimming well, I observed not before buying DF's DD a swimsuit. Most basic, black, 'school' looking onepiece for - tada! - 20 euro. And the pool was tiny, holding their interest for all of ten minutes. It fair tuckered DS2 out though so when we went down to dinner ('only' 27 euro each for a buffet style...) DS2 was a nightmare, screaming and throwing his food everywhere until we took turns to eat in shifts as he was pushed around in his buggy. Then back to room (did I mention only four english channels - news24, bloomberg, gospel channel, fashion channel... and the wifi in the room only worked right by the door... so the laptop we bought to amuse DS2 in a squeeze was useless) where the girls fell asleep again and DS2 was 'trying' for hours. Sunday we had a better time in the park until it was time to leave when we made sure we allowed more time than necessary to get to the airport given what happened on the way... train system seemed to go into meltdown, with delays that caused us to miss connections, caused DS2 to meltdown AGAIN on the train, and then at the airport. It just seemed however chipper we tried to stay, at every turn something else would happen to bring the mood crashing. Still, we did all manage to laugh about it... but it says a lot when you come home and the only positive thing you can think of is 'well, at least none if us got ill...' 
Considering writing to the hotel to complain about how we had no way of knowing the park would be half closed and would never have visited had we known (would have tried whilst there but every staff member we encountered with the british flag on their name tag to indicate they spoke english spoke limited english!)... and to somehow contest the fine on the train by contacting the train company but the whole, draining time has sucked the fight out of me! And what, relistically, will the hotel offer? Some free nights when the park IS open? Could we bear to go back, along with the ridulous amount of travel for something so close? I joked said for around twice the amount of money we spent we could have had a week (or two, depending on deals/time of year) at Disney in Florida!
Anyway. That was, partially, my weekend. There were other instances of rude people, disasters, general disappointment but I shall spare you, I've really rambled and moaned enough!