Freak Out Room For Those Newly Diffed Up After MC Part IX

[LAF77]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

Welcome fishandjam and confu3ed, and hello to everyone else.
fishandjam I hope the next two weeks don't drag by too much and that your next scan brings good news.
confu3ed I hope you're managing to relax sometimes, we all know what it's like here, I have been exactly the same.
biscuits I hope the scan goes well, good luck for today.
knitter that's great news about the nuchal scan, must put your mind at rest somewhat.

Well, I had my booking in appointment on Tuesday. The midwife was nice, but it all felt fairly formal as I expected. I told her there were some things I didn't know about family history and she said it's fine to check when we tell parents and then get back in touch if there is anything relevant, so that's good although I can't remember what is relevant and what isn't now! She asked me about the nuchal scan, so I wanted to ask your thoughts. I have signed for it, but can change my mind on the day of the scan. I'm really not sure what to do. I don't think I would risk an amnio if the results came back as high risk but it is difficult to know what our reaction would be if it did. I'm fairly sure we would continue as normal though. If it came back high risk and we decided to do no further tests would it just be a worry for the rest of the pregnancy? It's a tough decision, so it would be good to know your thoughts! Two weeks and counting until my next scan ..

I'm feeling much better this week, which has obviously got me freaking out a bit! At 11 weeks I'm trying to tell myself that's normal, I hope I'm right!

Lurking for news from biscuits - hope the scan goes well abs looking forward to seeing you on the grads

Thinking of you biscuits

Welcome con3ued feel free to wibble away here! Glad to see you on this thread.

hairy I can't believe you are 30 weeks now.

twitwoo I'm happy things are going well for you!

fishjam I hope time doesn't go by too slowly for you until the next scan.

Aw thank you for thinking of me ladies!

Well, we're back.. All ok. Still team surprise on the sex thing.

Also got put back to mw led care instead of consultant led care, which is fine. We were CL because DS was a couple of days prem and I had a third degree tear / forceps but they said the prem thing is not a concern (which I agree with) and they've recommended I have an experienced mw present for the birth to check how the tear situation is progressing!

So I guess this means I can now graduate

Yay - fab news biscuits

Congrats biscuits! great news :)

Congratulations biscuits!

Excellent news biscuits!

Woot! Well done biscuits

Thank y'all :)

good news biscuits

Welcome fish and con3used

Thanks for all the big smiles - they look similar to my own :)

Twitt for me we were always going to have the Nuchal measurements and bloods done - we have a high 'need to know'. Once you do know and if it is not the news one would hope for it means you can prepare and get the care you need and the baby needs. Often Downs babies have heart defects so you get extra scans with a cardiologist who checks for that for example... For us it wasn't about being informed so we could make a decision - but so that we were informed whatever the decision we took was. Does that make sense? But I do know that it's a very personal thing.

Hello again -
Biscuits fantastic news about the fabulous 20 week scan, am soooooo pleased for you. And you're half-way there now .

Sorry for very intermittent posting, it's the ol' lack of a laptop combined with the fact that DH seems to have gotten v attached to a game that he plays for a couple of hours when he gets home from work. By the time he gets off I'm wanting to go to bed, etc.

big waves to the new joiners - welcome!! and congratulations on your pregnancies.

Twittwoo congrats on the booking in, it's odd isn't it! Don't worry too much about feeling better at 11 weeks - that's when things started easing for me too, but I had several bad days too and still have random throwing up episodes - even this last week. The stretches of feeling better are getting longer though thank goodness.

Cat Hope Saturday's scan goes well. And that you can get some sleep afterward as no doubt it'll be a difficult evening & night beforehand.

I've definitely popped out this week - had a really uncomfortable couple of days when I felt like everything was stretching and pushing stuff around and then it was over and I have a definite bump and can no longer do the normal jeans, even with hair-tie and bump band.

Oh and my big up for the week was finding, at last, a local prenatal yoga class that is on Saturdays so don't have to stress about trying to fit it in to the days DS is at daycare, DH getting home in time etc etc. Now just have to cross fingers there are some places left on it.

I think I might have felt a few pings of movement every now and again, which is nice. Seriously hoping I'm not imagining things as I was told with an anterior placenta it would likely be later. Have another A/N appt this coming week so will ask for a doppler to check for HB before doing any talking.

biscuits - great news on the scan! That's wonderful, you must be so pleased.

knitter - thanks for the advice about the nuchal. I do understand what you're saying. It's such a tough and, you're right, personal decision. I don't want to bury my head in the sand at all but I've also heard many stories of people getting a high risk result and everything turning out fine. Because of previous mc I really wouldn't want to put this pregnancy at further risk by having invasive tests unless it felt absolutely necessary. Oh, perhaps I'm over thinking it. I don't know how we're going to come to a decision!

Good luck to those of you who have scans coming up in the next few days.

Hello everyone! It's good scan news from me today - one baby measuring 8 weeks and 1 day, and with a good heartbeat. Just so incredibly relieved!

Great news cat so happy to read that

Yay poppies - that is good news! Will you have another scan between now and 12 weeks?

Congrats to biscuits on graduating. Hoping to follow in your footsteps in a couple of weeks. My anomaly scan is a week on Weds.

ladym lovely to hear from you. I'm sure I popped out before 12 weeks! Have also started pregnancy yoga. Hoping it'll remind me to do my pelvic floors.

18 weeks tomorrow and feeling good. Bit of nausea yesterday which is strange for me, but might be from over-eating. Need to stop stuffing my face as tummy is already feeling quite restricted now. Am sure I'll be nervous nearer the scan but right now I feel like the worst is behind me.

Fab news cat whoop! :) x

digi looking forward to seeing you over in grads, can't believe its 18 weeks already x x

knitter great news on the results, so, so pleased for you xx

hairy keeping a chair for you warm in grads, hope you come and lurk at least soon xx

Waves to lady Kat and to everyone else xx < leaves salt and vinegar crisps for all those in the ms stage> x x

Great news Cat! Lovely to hear your news.

Thanks for the crisps Blackkat, my ms came back with a vengeance today - two episodes of sickness in one morning ..

I'm still not decided on the nuchal - DH is erring towards not getting it and I'm still totally unsure. Any words of advice or stories of your own experiences would be great. I was reading on another thread about a lady who got low risk with DS1 who has Down's, and high risk with DS2 who doesn't.

Waves to everyone!

Thanks Cat, great news about the scan. You must have felt amazing when you saw the heartbeat :)

Thanks Twittwoo, I am trying to relax but finding it so difficult as I am terrified. Wake up loads in the night to go to the loo (good sign I think) and when I wake I just cannot get to sleep for thinking about everything. I really didn't think that it would be this hard.

Thank you Laff, so pleased to be here and it is reassuring to speak to others who know exactly how I am feeling.

Excellent news Biscuits :)

Digi, 18 weeks...amazing!! :)

I get my second bloods tomorrow, terrified but kind of think that they will be OK as I have miscarried the past 2 times between 5 and 6 weeks which is where I am now. I think that is it for tests then until the scan a week tomorrow. The days seem to be dragging big time at the mo!!!

Twittwoo I can't offer any direct experience of the nuchal tests as I've not got to that stage before. Assuming I get to 12 wks this time (think positive!!) we're definitely planning on having the nuchal tests (measurement and bloods). I'm not sure what we'd do if it came out as high risk - I think I don't know how I'd feel until I was in that position, which hopefully we won't be. But, I just think I'd like to know, whatever the outcome. That way if it's high risk you can research the situation and be a lot better prepared than if you had no idea. I also think that I'd find not knowing quite stressful - I'd always be wondering and it would just be another thing to worry about. But it is such a personal decision to make and everyone is different.

Pie hello! How are you doing?

Confu3ed It is so difficult to relax isn't it? There is so much going on and it's all out of our control. I find the middle of the night is always the worst as you're just lying there in the dark with all these thoughts whirling round your head! I am trying to make a real effort to try to switch off all my worrying thoughts at night - which is obviously easier said than done! I don't know if it will help you - you may just think I'm mad - but for each stressful thought I try saying to myself "I am not going to think about that now, I will think about it in the morning." It takes a while to work through the list but eventually you get to the end! I also concentrate on taking slow, deep breaths which I find quite calming. In the morning when I think about all my worries, somehow it doesn't seem and I can think about things more rationally and calmly. I hope your bloods go well tomorrow.

twittwoo I had the NT and bloods with DS and got a low risk result (I was 36 at the time). I didn't give it any further thought. However, I'm now much more aware (not sure if that's a good or bad thing TBH) of the fact that I could be the 1 in XX. I think i've been googling/reading too much! If I make it to 12 weeks then we will be getting the test done and I'm already bricking it as i'm 39 now so know that the odds will be worse than when I was younger. Not sure where you are based but the Fetal Medical Centre in London is seemingly the gold standard of these tests (I think they pioneered it), but unfortunately I live about 550 miles from London! It really is such a personal decision but, for me, I would just want to know. Whether or not I would risk having invasive testing though would be another dilemma.

cat I am doing okay (so far!) 7 weeks tomorrow! It still feels so incredibly early! I think I will try and book a scan for next weekend when I am nearly 8 weeks. Locally it will cost £100 but if we do a 90 minute drive it's £25! They won't do it at my EPU unless you've had 2 miscarriages :(

Waves to everybody! Hope you are all well! Where did that fittie from McFly come from BTW (on Celebrity Jungle!) :)

knitter a little bird told me your news, I'm thrilled for you huge congratulations may you enjoy a nice uneventful pregnancy.

Hope everyone else in here is doing well. For those who don't me I was in your position and now I have a gorgeous 7 wk old... It's an emotional roller coaster getting through those first few weeks and then months until they arrive the worry doesn't stop but it's worth it

twitwoo we did the combined screening, nuchal fold and bloods. We came back as low risk. I wasn't going to entertain an amnio or CVS if we were low risk as the chances of mc as a result of that were higher than our odds of downs.

You might want to know if something is obviously wrong. I'm on my phone and I can't scroll back easily, but one of the ladies said that her result was 11mm (3mm is the point where they are concerned) and this showed that the baby wouldn't have survived. Getting your results won't guarantee a result one way or another, but it could tell you if there was something obviously wrong.

con3ued the early days are so hard. My thoughts are with you today.

Happy Monday!

Thanks LAF, Pie and Cat for the advice. We had a bit of a chat about it last night, and I was trying to convince DH that it would be worth getting for the reasons you have mentioned LAF. I think he'll be happy to go with whatever I decide, he's kind of sitting on the fence! There are certain situations where we would probably go ahead, but as you all say it's good to be informed and if something was severely wrong it would be important to know. Hopefully everything will be okay - it's not easy to think about these things, especially with the uncertainty everyone on this thread faces already and when really we just want to be excited!

Thinking of you today confu3ed - I hope you get a positive outcome.

Hello to everyone else, hope you're all having a good morning! x