With angel babies in the sky, some of us expecting rainbow babies, others still ttc and definitely swi!!

[Bluetinkerbell]

started new thread! we do talk a lot, don't we?

Cheese, praying hard that you get no more spotting and everything is ok. Also hoping that your DH will be okay and that they don't have to take his spleen out. You sound like you need a big hug!

Mel, your symptoms sound v promising! Are you sure you won't be testing soon?

Dachs, your boss sounds completely awful! Can you get HR involved, or anything to stop her being so unreasonable? She has no right to scream at you! (I know you know that, but I'm appalled that a manager in this day and age still gets away with behaving like that!) Hope she manages to control herself and doesn't upset you.

I was given the stickers by the MW - didn't have to order them myself. Not sure if that's something localised or not, but I wouldn't have thought so.

Blue, before my BFP I had a couple of days of brown discharge, and over the last couple of weeks my discharge has been much heavier (not brown any more, though, just clear or white). I didn't have much at all before the brown spotting - I was trying to spot EWCM and was confused because I didn't seem to have anything!

blue I've just ordered some stickers and also some laminated poem cards and a couple of trolley keyrings so the postage at least will cover those too. I remember having fairly heavy discharge and it continues all the way through!

Too Thanks, now's the time I'd usually have a glass of wine but having to make do with decaff tea! Touch wood, I've been ok so far tonight so maybe it was just the stress of the day? I've ordered some just in case they don't have any, the hospital I was first at when I asked about them she just looked at me and I had to explain what they were...and that was the consultant. Maybe this hospital will be different, it feels more personal as it's smaller, but I won't take any chances.

I have never been offered the stickers by any health professional so seems to be something you sort out yourself!!!
Cheese hugs (()) hope your DH gets some answers soon and no more spotting .
blue fx xx
Families; a funny lot. Sorry for awful in laws as well documented I ve not nor never will spoken to my MIL since Xmas with the appalling way she treated us, Georgie and my DH after loosing Georgie. She certainly won't be having anything to do with GILS unless Ant takes her to see the old bag!!!
Again, another source of negativity we can and do all live without.

hi all - interesting about this stickers for notes! i do think it should be standard just to avoid awful questions!!!!!! i think these people need some "tact" sometimes!!!!
Cheese- ooohhhhhh Praying all will be well for you and DH -no stressing its not allowed!!!!!!!!
Dachs- all i can say is "boss from Hell" !!!!!!!!!!
Blue - have everything crossed for you!!!!
Mel - those "symptoms " sounds ermmmmm very good indeed! we await for results!
AngelGeorgie -whats that saying oh yes " you can pick friends but not family"
totally agree with no wanting Negativity - remove it all!

well I did both an ov and pregnancy test this morning... both negative :(
sigh I normally am so patient, but I just can't bear it any longer...

too Yep, my boss is completely awful. And as well as being a total nightmare to actually work for, the last person who got pregnant she made redundant while she was on mat leave, and the other person in the department who worked part time because she had kids was made redundant at the same time. So I'm quite worried about all of it. And I will get HR involved if I need to, but it's just an extra level of stress I could do without at the moment. (I've actually already let HR know I'm pg and they said if I need to work from home or work fewer days or if there is anything I need then just let them know and it will all be fine, so I'm thinking they will be on my side)

blue I'm sorry about the tests both being negative :(

angel Sorry you have an awful MIL. My PIL aren't great either (when I was in hospital losing the twins they brought my niece and nephew to visit, who are 18m and 2 and a half and spent the entire time they were there talking about how changing the nappies on the 18m old was a real pain and the nappies were really heavy and how it would be great to have another really small baby in the family - I was lying there in bed thinking 'I know you're the most insensitive people in the world, but surely even you can see that this is completely inappropriate for you to be saying while I'm losing my much wanted babies that I've been trying really hard to create in the first place for 8 years') and I haven't spoken to my mother for about 10 years, so not a great deal of family support.

cheese Hope the spotting has stopped and that you are managing to relax a bit. And I hope they manage to sort DH out and that you both feel better soon :)

mama5 If you work out a way of removing negativity please let me know! You could make a fortune if you bottled it and sold it to pg women!

Morning all
Dachs I really do feel for you with your work nightmare, as if we all arn't stressed enough......I start a new job this week, attended training on friday and was really pleased that I managed to hold the vomit in all morning .
cheese really hope that your hubby is sorted out soon and Im sure that the spot bleeding was stress related, sending loads of prayers that you have no more.
blue maybe it is still too early for a BFP....fx thats the case
mel will you really be able to hold out on poas??? Strange that so many of us have inlaw issues....we havent spoken to dh mother for 8 years!!

Still feeling very nauseas and throwing up about 3 times a day.....if the feeling vanishes for an hour or so I immediatley start to panic that something is wrong instead of enjoying the relief!!! The MW that scanned me last week said, "I really feel for you, I think you have just got to the very start of an uphill marathon" how right she was.......

Morning, just a quick one as I'm waiting for dh. Heading back to a&e shortly as he's had some bleeding so, need to see what they want to do

cheese Really sorry to hear that. FX it goes well at A&E. Will be thinking of you and DH

Oh cheese, it never rains it just pours!! So sorry, you will be in my thoughts, update us when you can.

Cheese, thinking of you and DH - hope all is well now.

Razz, my MW keeps saying similar things - she said we just have to get to about 15 weeks and then she can come round weekly to listen to the heartbeat. That's still 6 weeks away! I don't really feel pregnant - just fat. I'm not feeling queasy so much, although I am getting tired easily. I wish I could feel the baby, but it's still such a long time until that's likely to start.

Dachs, really hope it works out with your boss. The last thing you need is that sort of hassle! At least HR sounds helpful.

Blue, , hopefully it is just too early for the pg test.

Angel, Dachs, Razz, to hear about your family problems.

Had a dream last night that I was breastfeeding a little boy - it was nice in some ways but v strange in others, as had come in to the hospital to be handed this baby and was surrounded by work ppl that I dont especially like, who were trying to make me go get in the car with them . Hence have spent some time this morning reading the boy section of my baby names book, but nothing is jumping out at me.

Cheese hope your DH manages to get some answers.
Diffed bloody he'll!!!! ??? What idiots??? My MIL spent all of Xmas ringing us up threatening to commit suicide to her son who was caring for me, started a new job with a 2 hour commute, 2 months after we had lost Georgie because " no one cared about her" !!! She also was the only person not to contribute to Georgie's just giving web site which was to raise money for the delivery suite, remembrance boxes etc...
Her answer when I asked why she was the only person not to contribute; " take it out of what Ant owes me from money I leant him for his first car!!" ( approx 22 years ago!!!)
Even mumsnetters contributed she bought flowers for Georgie's service then took them home after!!! She manipulated Georgie' s service at the end when the Minster , me and Ant were having our last quiet words with Georgie. The list is endless. Sufficient to say I certainly don t miss her or her selfish, manipulative ways. Quite amazing how self centred and selfish people can be Isn t it??
What your manager is doing/ done is illegal you can t make people redudent because they are pregnant.hope you receive help from HR and manage to come up with amicable solution. X
Blue fingers crossed it's too early.
Hi everyone else hope you re all chilling?
I ve been cleaning our kitichen and de cluttering. Where does all the crap come from???? Xx

you nesting AngelGeorgie

Angel, I wish I knew where all the crap comes from! I am about to get up and clean the kitchen too - DH used the last sponge to clean the bathroom so I have been unable to wipe the surfaces for the last couple of days, so they're a bit sticky and crumby. Think we have mice again too, grr! Must get DH to put the traps out. It's a downside to living in the middle of the country.

Mmm... Could be!!! There again, could be just cleaning our messy kitchen!!

Spoke too soon - feel v sick (and highly sorry for myself)! Bleurgh. Cooking chilli is really not helping. Keep looking at the seeds in the courgette and wanting to hurl. DH helpfully said his manflu was making him feel just as bad .

hi everyone, can't believe another weekend is nearly through! they go so fast.
cheese hope your DH is ok x
too your midwife sounds really nice, offering to come round every week. wish i had one like that.
blue still got my fx for you and mel your symptoms sound promising x
razz totally understand the lack of nausea stress, mine has been very much off and on this time and everytime I felt better I was stressing.
Hi to everyone else, sorry for the short post from me, I have been feeling a bit upset lately. Someone in my new job asked me if I had any children and there were loads of other people around so I just said no because it was easier and I have felt rotten about it since, like I am ignoring my little boy. I was also at a family bbq yesterday and everyone was congratulating us on this baby, I felt like Ciaran was getting pushed out already :( it's so hard sometimes

ciwi please don't feel like you were ignoring your baby boy, you did what you felt able to cope with at the time which is all any of us can ever do. Your pregnancy deserves lots of congratulations as you are growing a special brother/sister for Ciaran and he will watch over them like the angel he is. Don't be too hard on yourself.
too boo for the sickness, it is bloody awful
angel it is fab you have the energy to clean out your kitchen, all I want to do is sleep.

ciwi I have done the same several times already. Even though I said before I would always mention Sterre, sometimes I just don't have the energy to explain to random people what happened. So when they ask me how many children do you have? Just the one? I say just the one, and think in my head, no 2 but you don't need to know.

I just cooked and ate a roast dinner and now feel absolutely exhausted and chilling on the sofa!

I know it's too early to test... but I just had to try, with both my previous pregnancies, I always had negative tests, so they don't mean anything to me at the moment.
I'm keeping my nice Clearblue digital one until I have a BFP on a cheapo one...

cheese I hope the spotting has stopped! How is your DH doing?

Quick update on dh. Just got home and knackered. We started in a&e and then moved to a ward. They wanted to keep him in because of the bleeding and his platelet levels had dropped again. They're 11 now :( He just refused to stay in so, if any bleeding overnight all 999 basically overwise we have to call in the morning to see if there's a bed and go in again.

He had a cannula put in for ease of blood taking earlier but that's out now. The haematologist will be seeing him tomorrow to discuss what to do and more bloods taken to see how he's responding to the medicines. His steroid dose was upped and he now has to take 32 of those a day along with transexmic acid (sp) to try and stop the bleeding which he was started on today.

Hoping his levels go up and that he won't need a transfusion. So worried now, he's so stubborn :( My mum's been great and been looking after the dcs while we were out and will be again tomorrow. School starts on Tues. I'm supposed to be going in on Tues morning myself to see a diabetic nurse and a nuchal scan in London on Wednesday, have to see about that now!

No more spotting though touch wood.

Oh Cheese. I hope the bleeding stays stopped and he doesn't need a transfusion. I hope you both manage to get some sleep tonight. I have just Googled ITP because I am very ignorant and had never heard of it before. Good luck for tomorrow - will he have to stay in tomorrow if there's a bed? Glad you've got your mum helping out. Hope you make your appts on Tues - are you diabetic, or are they just testing you?

Ciwi, that must have been so hard! I don't know what I would say in that situation (luckily it hasn't arisen yet) but I expect I would do the same - much easier than explaining everything. It's tough - I don't want to deny Thea, but I can see that in some situations not telling people about her would be so much easier for me. I think that you have to do whatever helps you get through the day, and having to explain it all to semi-strangers who wouldn't know what to say would definitely make it harder to cope. Ciaran won't mind - he knows that you love him just as much whether you talk about him or not.

Family is different - they won't have forgotten, they just want to be able to tell you how pleased they are that you're pregnant again! And they're scared of upsetting you if they mention Ciaran, I expect.

I wonder how Spilt is getting on with baby Freya. I do worry about the post-natal period - coping with having a baby that isn't Thea. I hope she (Spilt, I mean!) is getting along swimmingly!

Too I agree with you I too worry about wheter after GILS is here me and Ant will be total basketcases!! I feel, since Georgie died we ve literally been holding our breath. I mentioned this to my Midwive. But on reflection if I do develop it we ll come through it as we have done up to now.
Us (ie; with losses on here have battled through so much already I view it that there's nothing we couldn't handle now)
Ciwi I think it was you who mentioned not always admitting you already had Ciaran I think it's a personal issue and a lot depends on your ( ours) mood of the day. I have had quite a few people ask me if this is my first and I always tell them about Georgie. On a course at work last week a member of staff from my trust asked me if this was my first cue ; my Georgie tale. She was visibly upset , offered me condolences , advised me her daughter is currently pregnant and wouldn t be telling her daughter about me as it " would scare her" !!
This annoyed me, I can understand the reason behind what she was saying but as I said to her. " people need educating about stillbirth, it needs to be talked about. I was blissfully unaware of stillbirth to it happened to me" not to scare her daughter but why should I be made to feel me and what happened to Georgie needs to be put in a box , shut away from the world.
Can t believe it's nearly work time again
Grh.... Xx

cheese thinking of you.

First full day of work today, so might be a bit tough. I started a proper exercise regime yesterday, in the attempt to de-stress and also to loose some pg weight to help along ttc. I need to start feeling better about myself and having this extra weight cant help. My boss has already said that if it gets to much then I can go home early so we shall see.

Work has been ok but several of them have said that they will not mention Ophelia as it will upset them! Excuse me! Upset you? I told one guy that I loved talking about Ophelia which I do, DH and I talk about her all the time but I know thats different. I suppose they saw me crying on thursday and now think they cant say anything or they dont know what to say. Its like Im constintly laying down the new rules of how to act and talk around me if you know what I mean.

hope you all have a good day.

Green good luck. You may find work is good for you as a distraction. When I returned my counsellor said " unfortunately it will be up to you to let people know when is good to talk about Georgie and when's not." she said people will wait to be guided by me as they won t want to upset me. This sounds the same; maybe you need to let them know what/ how you want them to be with you.

green Good luck today. I hope it goes well, but at least you have a nice boos if it all gets too much for you.

angel I'm sure you and Ant will be fine when GILS arrives - my obgyn said that having a baby after a stillbirth or late loss actually helps the healing process and takes some of the pain away from the memory rather than feeling like a replacement - I'm hoping this is true if my current pg works out.

cheese How is DH doing today? I have everything crossed that the bleeding stops and he starts recovering.

First scan at 12 today - have had hardly any sleep worrying about it so am completely knackered now! :)