Freak Out Room For Those Newly Updiffed After M/C Part VIII

[dooscooby]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

Hi all,

Freelance - I'm sorry to hear you've had no news. It must be hard waiting, but I have everything crossed for you. I didn't go to the hospital, I'm just going to wait until the bleeding stops and do a pregnancy test to check it's negative. It was a little early for a scan, and by yesterday morning I was sure about what was happening, sadly. Our plan to wait a month and try again. I'm coping much better this time, although I think my defense mechanisms are up and I'm keeping myself busy.

Stitch - Thank you, I will check out the other thread soon. I don't want to keep hanging out here, although I will keep an eye on the thread to see how you're all getting on. It's been incredibly supportive on here.

Mitsouko - Welcome, it's nice to hear good news about a BFP! We all know how hard it is with a previous loss, but stay positive. If it helps, when I told my midwife I was concerned at being almost 34 she said, 'you're young, at 34 you have lots of time left'. You're only a couple of years older, so as long as you're fairly healthy I don't think it makes a big difference.

xx

I'm back. And I'm freaking out big style! convincing bfp today on First Response, cheapie and Superdrug tests. Third time lucky perhaps? Please please please. Am only about 3+4 at the moment so won't be joining the list or hassling the doctors yet. Will have a nice read of the thread and see who you all are and what's been going on since my last brief stay here.

OMG OMG OMG KittyKat! That is awesome - massive slap on back!

If you're anything like me, you'll get through another ten tests before Wednesday. Got absolutely everything crossed for you - sounds like excellent news so far and praying this will be the stickiest of beans in the history of beans. I know this sounds like a super old wives tale, but please take the next few days to relax, put your feet-up, not get stressed and eat lots of chocolate (last point was just added for effect!)

Hoping and praying for you!

Hi

My scan went good this morning jumping bean measuring 64mm so date is now the 8th of feb. I thought I had posted earlier obviously the iPhone gobbled it up! I have been going around with stupid grin all day!

freelance sorry your scan wasn't helpful. Will keep fingers crossed for you.

Welcome to newcomers will name check later as still at work.

On the cervix front I was told today I had an amazing one!

Purple glad your scan was good - you must be very happy this afternoon :)

Oh and at your 'amazing cervix'. Between that and Freelance's 'profound vagina' we must be a very desirable bunch of ladies :)

Hope everyone else is ok this afternoon.

Not much to report here. Days are ticking by so slowly I am tempted to check to see if they are actually going backwards. Still only 5+5 but BFP seems like about a month ago, not a week! Still mw is booked for 2 weeks on Thursday (when I'll be 8+1 by cycle dates) so just ticking the days off until that. Would feel a little reassured if I could have a bit of nausea start before I see the mw but other than that I am hoping it is a very uneventful 2 weeks.....

mitsuoko I am currently 16 weeks pregnant after 3 mc and aged 43. I was told Poor Egg Quality was most likely causing trisomies. (No causes were found in the recurrent miscarriag tests) But this time I have been tested (nt and blood tests) and am low risk for downs, patau and Edwards.

I think as our age advances our eggs do lower in quality but ALL the medical people I spoke to have said "keep trying it's entirely possible you'll get a good one". So we did - and am hoping this is a good one!

Wave to everyone - I'm mildly freaking out as I have a scan next week - but I also have a growing bump.

Ps: I didn't book midwife til week 13 as I was so paranoid.

velvet I am really sorry for your poo problems!! But at the same time am SO glad I am not alone in this! Also, you are damn right about the hurting wind! I had it all day and I couldn't bend over because it hurt my lower tummy!

Mitsouko welcome to the thread. I am sorry for your loss, but a big big congratulations on getting pregnant again!

Purple Glad your scan went well!

stitch I hope the apricots are working for you!!

freelance I'm sorry your scan had no answers. I know it's a horrible waiting game and I really really hope everything turns out for the better.

kat Congratulations!

hairylights Good luck with your scan next week!

Thank you all caring about my bottom!! I haven't "tried" it out today, but I do definitely have constipation, and it is very bad. I've eaten so much fruit and many fibrous things, but still nothing and I am really scared to sit on the loo too now... I'm going to ask my MW about lactulose syrup tomorrow.

Waves to everyone hope you're enjoying the lovely weather - it is absolutely amazing tonight!

Yay purple glad to hear about your scan.

freelance I'm sorry that you are worried. It isn't a nice thing to have an inconclusive scan.

Glad to hear from you hairy 16 weeks already!

Welcome mitsuoko and kat

I hear you on the feeling like it has been forever since BFP biscuits It has only been a month since conception, but it seems like an eternity. T-29 hours until my first scan.

Carrying on with the bottom theme, I ate a 450g of cherries plus 200g of mango on Sunday and I was right as rain yesterday, so I'd recommend excessively high doses of fruit to move things along. I must have gone to the loo 5 times yesterday.

I was quite alarmed because my abdominal area swelled up to look as if I was 12 weeks pregnant and I thought that I would struggle to get through the BBQ without anyone making a comment. I wore a very loose fitting dress so hopefully no one would see. My stomach is back to a normal size now. No one noticed my lack of drinking because I was rushing around the whole time and accepted a glass of champers at the beginning of the BBQ. My friend asked what I was having and I sort of mumbled something and then the wasps came and caused a major diversion and spared me.

It was a bit heartbreaking though. DH really loved being around their toddler and playing with him. I felt like such a failure as none of our babies were there.

LAF You're not a failure. The MCs were not your fault and you know that. Two of my babies were due around the same time as friends - everytime I see their children or pictures on FB, I just get reminded of what could have been.

An update from me! Things are moving along again, and no bleeding!! You're right LAF fruit really does work!!

freelance I've got everything crossed for you, how awful having to wait...hope you get some good news soon x

stitch sorry you are in a lot of pain - but it does appear to be normal, which is good news. We are mad aren't we, happy to be feeling sick ha ha What is your hospital appt on Thursday for, booking in?

twittwoo glad to hear you are coping better x

kat congrats

purple made up for you and the good news from your scan, and of course your amazing cervix!

biscuits nothing to report is good, keep it up!!

hairy glad to know everything is progressing well good luck for your scan x

milky hope it clears out up soon

LAF glad you got through the BBQ without being discovered, but sorry you got a bit upset I agree with the bloating tummy thing, I went to a friends for a meal on Friday night and ate more than normal to be polite, my stomach was so huge we couldn't believe it when we got home! Goes back to normal in the morning though!

Right I've had a go at the stats, sorry if I get anything wrong

Tuesday 2 August

Lovemysleep 30+0 EDD 11/10/11
Hils74 26+4 EDD 8/11/11
Haffertee 25+3 EDD 14/11/11
Ninunina: 25+0 EDD 15/11/11
delilahbelle 24+5 EDD 22/11/11
Mattsmama 24+5 EDD 17/11/11
Banana87 24+0 EDD 22/11/11
Jigglebum 21+5 EDD 8/12/11
Minnie74 21+3 EDD 12/12/11
Lucky 20+1
Dooscooby 19+5 EDD 22/12/11
Harassed 19+4 EDD 22/12/11 next scan 02/08/11
Hadrian 19+3 EDD 25/12/11 next scan 15/08/11
Youremindmeofthebabe 17+5 EDD 5/1/12 next scan 19/8/11
Freezingmyarseoff 17+4 EDD 6/1/12 next scan 18/8/11
Updiffed 17+3
Milkyways 17+2 EDD 08/01/12 Next scan 22/08/11
Hairylights 16+5
Bump 16+3 EDD 14/01/12
Mamarara 15+5
Laylasmummy09 15+4
Lily06 15+3 EDD 21/01/12 Next scan 25/08/11
Pigletmania 15+2
ladybird33 15+2 EDD 22/1/12 Next scan 5/8/11
purpletoes 12+5 EDD 09/02/12 next scan 01/08/11
MrsSteph 10+2 Next scan 20/07/11
Stitchinline 9+6 EDD 29/02/12 next scan 18/08/11
Shellshock7 9+1 EDD 5/3/12 next scan 19/8/11

On the grads thread too:

Nickster 39+2 EDD 7/8/11
Orange 35+2 EDD 4/9/11
Wombat33 34+5 EDD 10/09/11
Daisybell 34+0 EDD 14/09/11
Pinkfondantfancy 32+0 EDD 25/09/11
Tiggersreturn (TTT) 32+0 EDD 26/09/11
mamapower 31+6 EDD 28/9/11
ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts 31+3 EDD 01/10/11
Emoo 30+4 EDD 7/10/11
Tunnocksteacake 28+1 EDD 24/10/11
Onions 28+1 EDD 24/10/11
IreneHeron 28+1EDD 23/10/11
Velvetcu 28+0 EDD 25/10/11
MummyAbroad 26+4 EDD 4/11/11
CEP 26+3 EDD 5/11/11 next scan 19/8/11
CollieandPup 24+2 EDD 20/11/11 next scan 6/7/2011
Katherine2008 25+5 EDD 10/11/11
wombatinwaiting 23+5 EDD 24/11/11
LaraMi 23+4 EDD 25/11/11 Next scan 20/07/11
Bigmacsauce 23+0 EDD 29/11/11
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy 23+3 EDD 26/11/11
Blackkat 22+1 EDD 5/12/11 Next scan 26/07/11

In our thoughts and prayers
Dachs whose beautiful little babies Alexander & Felicia left this world sleeping

Thinking of.... ladybee; digi; A&R; barbie; MumTum; Knitter, Kat2504, Mistress P, willitbe, twittwoo

Yay for a good scan purple, very happy for you :o

The appointment on thursday is for booking in shellshock, they have also given me a scan date of the 12th which is a bit sooner than I had expected. I too have the magical growing a shrinking tummy

glad things are moving along milky

sorry you have been a bit down LAF, it is always so hard to have these reminders but as milky said you are not a failure at all

congratulations Kat lovely to see you here

not sleeping well at all atm, just can't get comfy and spent from 3 - 5 this morning wide awake. Dh not happy at all - when I asked him how he slept he just looked at me with eyebrows raised. oOps

Think I need to go and get myself new pillows and see if that helps

Plus finding the trip to work most unpleasant, just feeling so icky. Def improves when I eat but taking that first mouthful is so hard sometimes.

thanks for your words of encouragement stich and milky Sometimes I see little children and I wonder if they look similar to how our babies would have been.

shell I do agree that my stomach does seem to get really big at certain points in time and then deflates a bit. Weird.

hairy and stitch I'm with you on the MW appointment. I won't book an appointment for several weeks yet. I saw her at the last pg around 9 weeks, so I am known to her. I have to pass a few milestones before I can do it. I guess it's my way of protecting myself from hurting over another loss.

I'm exhausted too. It is too hot to sleep.

I am mentalling it a bit. Scan is just over 13 hours away. I've been successful in not thinking too much about the pg. I obsessed over my last 3, looking at books every night, buying magazines, etc. Will the next 24 hours bring me some hope in the first step of my long journey?

I feel generally more positive. I prod my boobs and they hurt a little bit when I do that. I have felt like I am going to be sick 3 times today, but never brought anything up. It's never happened in any of the previous pgs. DH said that I am being ridiculous for thinking like that, but he's a man, what does he know? :-)

LAF, I felt sick during the early weeks with this pregnancy too whereas with the pregnancies that failed I never once felt nauseous or was sick; even with my 2 MMC's. So I agree it is a very good symptom to have. Also, although it is a pain in the neck, constipation can be taken as a good sign too that your body is producing progesterone! Good luck with the scan tomorrow!

stitch I'm having trouble sleeping in this hot weather too. Last night I took a cushion to bed to place under my bump and I spent more time moving the cushion about to get comfortable, than actually sleep!

In regards to booking in appointments, I didn't book in until I was 13 weeks along. I felt I would jinx everything if I booked it early again and even when I did book it, I was sure I would mc within the week, because that is what had happened every other time.

I met my MW today, and she looks JUST like Sarah Jessica Parker!! I was shocked! She's quite young, but was very sympathetic, so I'm going to stick with her in the future.

Evening,

Apologies if this is a bit of a me me me post but am camping with my parents and not got much signal to read everything. Anyway, am freaking out just now as nor feeling particularly pg at all.

I'll be 6 weeks tomorrow and don't feel sick yet. Can't remember when i had ms in pg with ds but had no ms when i had a mc I have tummy cramps tonight and am so worried something might go wrong.

I also can't sleep as it emerges that in the 17 yrs since I last went on hols with my parents my dad now snores like a train

I feel a bit stupid for booking my mw appt for 8 weeks as most of you don't see them until later and am just all in a mess.

It took us so long to get this BFP I don't want to have to start again.

I'm sorry again that this is such a moany post but I am just feeling so stressed out.

LAF hope your scan can give you some reassurances x

Period due today. Lines on FR darker which is surely a good sign?

Going to see the docs this morning. Am worried cos I was in the middle of recurrent miscarriage testing. Had one positive test for Lupus Anticoagulant but that means I need to have the test repeated. Am worried that by getting diffed before having any sort of diagnosis means I will miss out on some treatment that I potentially need and will have yet another wasted pregnancy. Aaaaaarrrrgggghhhh!

biscuits I think most people commonly get m/s around 6 or 7 weeks so not to worry that you haven't had any yet.
Also booking in appt at 8 weeks is what most people do. I did last time. The doctor told me to do that so my scan could be arranged in time. When you have your booking in appt won't make any difference to the outcome of your pregnancy. You cant jinx it!

biscuits I didn't get ms with either my mmc nor this one so whilst everyone pins so much on that as a symptom (I was told by several people that because I didn't have it again this pg was likely to fail too) it is possible that you are one of the small percentage of women who don't get it.

Hi All, LAF good luck for the scan today!! Let us know how it goes. Am sure it will be fine.

Loving your SJP lookalike MW Milky! Not what you expect them to look like :)

I know what you mean about scheduling the booking appointment Biscuits but at the moment it is all just a waiting game anyway. Half of me is regretting having got scanned so early as now I already know something might be going wrong again, or it really might have just been too early, but either way it hasn't helped much. BUT for me, as I am on such a cocktail of drugs, if it is going to go wrong I think I am happier to find out earlier this time. Last time I started to miscarry naturally at 12 weeks and it was so bloody painful and so drawn out I don't want to go down that road again.

Kat the darker lines are definitely a good sign. Can you carry on testing and potentially treating now you are pregnant too? I know what you mean about the worry of a wasted pregnancy though, that is exactly how I feel at the moment. I have no morning sickness, no boob soreness, the only thing I have is bloatedness and hunger and both of those can be attributed to steroids, oh and I have an empty sac as yet that didn't date any later from one week scan to another. Not looking good. But I guess even a 'wasted' pregnancy might tell us something we didn't know and help me make the next one more successful.

Oh dear. I don't exactly sound like cheerfulness and light here this morning do I! Am ok actually, just trying to be pragmatic until next scan on Wednesday. Good luck to the scans today! xx

Hi ladies sorry I haven't been on for a whle, I've had to stay away for a bit to prevent extra mentalling, I'm terrified that I have stopped feeling baby move and not really got a bump, if I lie on my back there's absolutely nothing, I have by 16 week appointment with the midwife today and I'm ptaying she will hear a hearytbeat but aai really don't think she will, DH keeps telling me off for negaative thinking but I just don't feel pregnant and I'd be very happy to be proved wrong, my appt is at ww 30 so not too long and ill let you all know how I get on. sorry for the me me me post but all being well ill come and catch up properly later as I'm on my phone xxx

Hey Layla good look with the mw appt today. Remember it can take them a while to find the hb so try not to panic too much if you don't hear it right away.

LAF think you're also having a scan today-hope it all goes well and you get some deserved temporary relief from the stressing.

biscuits this is my 3rd or 4th pg and I still had my booking in at 8 wks. I struggled to arrange it for later and so went for it. I suppose it was a bit different for me as I'd never actually been 'booked in' before as never made it that far, so I kind of saw it as a milestone I wanted to finally achieve! Are you able to get an early scan so that you might feel more comfortable booking in?

Hi to eveyond else-on my phone so can't catch up on everything

Fast update from me, baby is measuring 6+4 with a strong heartbeat. 2 days ahead of where I should be. I could cry. It's a long road ahead, but I'm starting with some hope.

Yay for a good scan laf

Hi ladies, I hope that everyone is coping alright today...

Just a quick question to those of you who have been having early scans - is there really any benefit? How much can they tell from a scan before 12 weeks?

I'm 6+2 today and was wondering if there would be any point to being scanned at 8-9 weeks. If there's no heartbeat, empty sac, problems, etc I'd rather know asap so that I can sort it out and be done with everything.

Last time, I didn't find out about my MMC until 12 weeks, and it was a terrible shock as I still had all my pregnancy symptoms and not a clue that anything had gone wrong. Also, the physical trauma of MC at 14 weeks was really rough. If I could just have an ERPC at an earlier stage, it would be so much easier.

However, I've read a few threads about early scans being pretty inconclusive. Even when no heartbeat / embryo found the advice seemed to be to wait it out as sometimes there's a chance - and it's hard to see much until 12 weeks anyway?

I've not even made a GP appointment at this stage, so not sure how soon I could be referred to EPU at local hospital anyway. However, I can go to a walk in EPU at another hospital nearby if need be. Might feel a bit guilty about that just for reassurance scan though.

Wow LAF that really is great news. Must be really reassuring. Yes there is still a long way to go but it is a wonderful start to know that it's there, in the right place and there's a little heart beating.

Mitsouko speaking as someone who has just had two early and inconclusive scans I would say wait a couple of weeks longer. I too miscarriaged at 12 weeks and it went on for a couple of weeks and I know exactly how you feel in wanting to find out earlier this time. The worry over not seeing anything is immense though. I do actually feel something is going wrong again but will have another scan on Weds to see what they can see, if anything.

But on the fiip side, you are right and that I feel quite positive knowing that if I know early I can get it out of the way earlier this time and move on a bit quicker. At least it won't be so much of a shock. I realise that's not the most optimistic way of thinking about it but it's true I guess too.