Freak Out Room For Those Newly Updiffed After M/C Part VIII

[dooscooby]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

I seem to be OK this AM milky but I am on high alert.

You have hit the nail on the head, MC takes the hope and the future away from you. When it has happened to me, I couldn't think about future plans. I could only think about the day I was in and no further. DH would make plans for us, but I was very passive in it all.

48 hours to go...

LAF glad to hear Jo more bleeding - as you say it is really taking it minute by minute but still have everything crossed for you.

You and Milky hit the nail on the head with the stuff snot taking hope away. My DH summed it up I think when we talked about he - he said it is like we have nothing to gain and everything to lose. Not very jolly for a Monday morning but it made me think.

Thinking of you both LAF and Freelance x

Stupid iPad typos. So sorry. Jo should have been 'no' and snot was supposed to be about. Don't know where apple get their auto correct from.....

Hi all, glad you have had no more bleeding LAF. I haven't had any either, just a tiny bit of spotting, but I think for me it really is indicative of the end of this one anyway. More based on the scans and then the spotting, if you see what I mean. My plan is go to into EPU on Weds and hopefully have a finally conclusive scan and arrange an ERPC. I want to get on with it again! I am even working out when I might be able to try again and what that might mean for due dates. Which is silly really as there are so many damn variables - body taking time to recover from another mc, getting pregnant again, trying to hold on to the damn thing...

MilkY really glad you have gone out of your way to enjoy life despite everything that is going on. I mean, this IS really, really hard. But we only get one life and it's really important to enjoy the whole experience. I guess I am an optimist at heart. Not in some Pollyanna way, I was muttering to myself this morning when taking the steroids for high NK cells that it seems a bit bloody pointless to be taking them now, but just in a not wanting this to ruin my life way. We have to hope it will all turn out ok in the end.

Having a bit of a chuckle at Biscuits having snot to lose . Every time I write 'yeah' on my iPhone it thinks I want to say Utah! It's got to the stage where I think Utah is more suitable. Utah...?

Keep strong everyone xxx

Hi there
Just popping in to see how you all are - really sorry to hear about the bleeding/spotting for both LAF and freelance. LAF how far along are you? I know you know spotting/bleeding can be ok but it's terrifying regardless isn't it - I had 3 episodes this time, always on a Sunday - why is that so?! The first was as DH was dropping me off at the train station to work away for a few days and I had to sit on a train for 3 hours thinking that was it - thankfully I was wrong that time. Anyway, I'm pleased it's slowed down/stopped and hope the hours go quickly until your scan on Weds.
freelance hope you also get confirmation/clarification re your situation on weds, your attitude to trying to enjoy life is inspiring.

Anyway, best wishes to everyone else toughing out the rocky first months, hang in there xx

Hi Angela congrats on your BFP

LAF and Freelance so sorry to hear about the bleeding you have had over the weekend I know exactly what you mean about how you feel, it does feel like bleeding is inevitable and that we are just waiting for it to happen, which is why we check every time we go the loo - and lets be honest in between visits too. I really hope you get some positive news xxx

Hi doo I'm 8 weeks today. It is so scary. I wish I had a crystal ball to know how this would turn out.

I haven't noticed any blood at all today. I have brought up food twice in the last 24 hours. Maybe it will be OK, maybe it won't be. I'm just drained from the worrying.

I watched dragons den last night and I had an idea, but no idea how to execute it. If only there was some way that we could get a daily check on our HCG levels, to check and see if they contine to rise. There would be so many women who would want to know every day that things are OK at home without going to a hospital.

One day, girls will look back at us and wonder how did we cope?

freelance I hope you are ok today.

LAF Glad there is no more blood today. Fingers crossed it stays that way. I am feeling very un-pg today :(.

Only 2 sleeps until we can have our scans though - I'm still here to hold your hand all the way.

I know what you mean about the crystal ball thing - and what a great idea about the HCG tester.

You could do with something like diabetics have where you have a little reader that can do it off your blood (or whatever the hormone is that they test for in your blood - I am certainly no scientist!). But something like a pin prick test and an integrated reader would be great.

Do you think the hormones follow a scientific enough pattern that it wouldn't give false alarm?

Freelance hope you're ok today too.

Hello everyone else - naturally I hope you're all doing ok too :)

LAF an at home HCG test would be great! Wonder if it is possible to do one that pricks your finger like an at home blood sugar level. Talking of blood sugar, I feel annoyed with myself that I am fat and bloated again and have to start all over again now am miscarrying. The steroids and pregnancy made me really hungry and also, this being my 4th pregnancy to this stage, I think my uterus swelled up really quickly. I am going to have to start back at the gym and not eating like a pregnant person this week. I guess by the end of thee week I could be off the meds anyway, so that will help. Biscuits your name isn't helping - makes me want to eat :)

Glad you are not bleeding today LAF. I have had more gunk and it's going a darker red colour so pretty sure it's it for me. Also it would be around the time that I had my second period after LMP so in a way there is something comforting about it being 'in cycle' as it were. Hopefully that will mean it won't be too hard to get back into a cycle afterwards. I am not going to post much on here any more - I don't want to bring anyone down! I am not actually feeling too down - planning holidays, planning when to start again and looking to the future. But I want all you pregnant people to have lots of positive vibes and I will definitely be lurking for all your news xxxxxx

Freelance sorry things are taking a turn for the worse . We're here if you want us (don't worry about 'bringing us down' that's what we're here for). Hand holding on demand. But I do understand if you need a break. I hope you are getting plenty of support and cuddles in RL and that your scan on Wed allows you to move forward.

I'll even consider changing my name to something less tempting, perhaps Celery.....

Hello everyone.

Freelance, I'm sorry to hear that things aren't looking good. Your positive attitude is fantastic though, and I think we could probably all take inspiration from you! Don't feel bad about bringing anyone 'down', as Biscuits said, we're here to offer one another support.
I'm not feeling very positive at all today, tbh. Still having brown discharge (it's been 17 days now), and this afternoon/evening, I've started having cramps. I don't feel pregnant at all, despite having had some nausea over the weekend. I honestly feel that it will be all over very soon, ironic that I've got my booking appointment tomorrow afternoon! If it's the end, I just hope that it's over and done with quickly. I will get back on it though, and probably try again almost straightaway.

Moomin sorry to hear there is still spotting. Could you get another scan at the epu or anything? I know though that it is stressful and plays on your mind. We're here if you want some hand holding but in the meantime I'll be keeping everything crossed that things don't get any worse.

LAF glad to hear there's been no further bleeding today and that you still have some pregnancy symptoms. Hopefully it was nothing. That is a really good idea about the hcg test. Like others have said, a pin prick test was the first thing that came to mind; you would need something like a plate inside the test that would give an ELISA reaction using hcg antibodies, so the pregnant woman's hcg in the blood attaches itself to the hcg antibodies; if that makes sense; just like in the urine test. I'm not sure if you can do that with normal blood, or whether the blood has to be made into serum first though.

freelance Please don't feel like you are bringing people down - we've all been there and are here to help you through this and listen, if you want. I really do admire your positivity through everything and I am really glad you are planning holidays and looking forward to the future.

Sorry you are still spotting moomin.

Talking of biscuits, I've recently discovered Party Rings again! They are so yummy! I ate a whole pack today :)

I only posted here a couple of times but just wanted to let you know that I had miscarriage number 4 on Sunday evening, physically this one was alot easier as I was only 7 weeks, had a scan today to check all was gone and it looked fine. At least this one didn't drag out.

I have gone from feeling totally gutted at this happening again to looking to the future and making plans for testing/treatment.

I still feel optimistic that we can crack it again and if we end up with five years between DC then that is not the end of the world.

Feels like a long road ahead and it is very hard to resist the urge to just try again, but I am going to focus on enjoying my precious DD and not get too hung up on TTC.

I wish everyone luck in their journey and hope to be back in the freak out room next year : )

Good luck for your scans this week and hope all bleeding has stopped.

freelance and doitnicely I am so sorry to hear that your pregnancies have ended/ending. It is heartbreaking and I am thinking of you both.

freelance are you going to go for ERPC?

doitnicely have you had tests for RMC yet?

Doitnicely so so sorry to hear about your loss . I hope you have lots of RL cuddles and support and we are here if you need us. Hope you can be back here I'n the future with a more positive outcome. I admire your positive outlook - and good luck x

doit I'm sorry to hear about your loss

This is a sad thread at the moment.

LAF -hope youre doing ok, my spotting started at 8 weeks, seems to be a relatively 'normal' time to experience it unfortunately.

On the bus so can't stop but just wanted to send a hug to freelance.

I think a couple of you have also got scans coming up so wishing you all the very best with them x

I haven't been on the thread for a while and lurked this morning for a catch up. velvet is right it's a very sad thread at the moment. Im so sorry so many of you are having such scares and fearing the worst.

doit so sorry for your loss

freelance hoping you are wrong, but sorry it doesn't feel like its looking good.

LAF fx for you tomorrow

X

doitnicely so sorry for your loss :(

LAF hope things are going OK for you and there has been no more spotting

freelance really hope you get a conclusive answer this week, am so sorry things have not gone well for you. I really do admire your optimistic outlook

moomin sorry you are spotting and hoping it is all OK at the booking in for you

everytime I have an appointment I think I am jinxing things and I seem to have so many at the moment, yesterdays was actually really good although they were running nearly 2 hours behind.
I met my doctor and midwife who will be taking care of me and as they said there are advantages of being high risk as I will get to see them all the way through and get a nice continuity of care. It was all very relaxed and friendly so starting to feel a bit more comfortable. I was having trouble adjusting to the idea of not having private care which is what I would have if I was living back home but now feeling better about it all. A silly worry I know

I have decided to keep my private NT scan appointment for Thursday as I can just see myself going back to the NHS one and them still not being able to get the right measurements. Not because they aren't good enough but because they can't spend the time that might be required. Plus not sure i can wait til friday

So sorry for you loss, Doitnicely.

Glad your appointment went well yesterday, Stitch, it makes all the difference. I hope my booking appointment is ok, at least I can talk to the Dr about my concerns (paranoia!!)

Biscuits, I have another scan booked at the EPU for next Thursday, their policy is to routinely scan in 2 weeks of they can't give a conclusive answer. 2 weeks seems such a long time to leave someone waiting, I don't know why it can't be one week, but I suppose that if a gest sac is seen at 5 weeks, they should be able to see an embryo by 7 weeks (if there is one in there). Still got spotting and cramping, but actually feeling quite sick today, so feeling a bit more positive than yesterday. Someone I work with has just had her 3rd miscarriage in 18 months, one was twins, 3 were after 12 weeks. So it really puts things into perspective for me.

I've updated the stats but not sure if they are right or not - I seemed to have gained a few days so not sure if it's the case for everyone or just me?

I also created a MIA for those that haven't posted for a while (and are over 20 weeks) as I think the big list can be a bit intimidating if you're just starting out. If anyone objects happy to go back.

Tuesday 16 August

Bump 18+5 EDD 14/01/12
Freezingmyarseoff 19+6 EDD 6/1/12 next scan 18/8/11
Updiffed 19+5
Milkyways 19+4 EDD 08/01/12 Next scan 22/08/11
Hairylights 19+0
Mamarara 18+0
Laylasmummy09 17+6
Pigletmania 17+4
ladybird33 17+4 EDD 22/1/12 Next scan 5/8/11
purpletoes 15+0 EDD 08/02/12 next scan 04/10/11
MrsSteph 12+4 Next scan 20/07/11
Stitchinline 11+6 EDD 29/02/12 next scan 18/08/11
Shellshock7 11+3 EDD 5/3/12 next scan 19/8/11

MIA
Lovemysleep 32+2 EDD 11/10/11
Hils74 28+6 EDD 8/11/11
Haffertee 27+5 EDD 14/11/11
Ninunina: 27+2 EDD 15/11/11
delilahbelle 27+0 EDD 22/11/11
Mattsmama 27+0 EDD 17/11/11
Banana87 27+0 EDD 22/11/11
Jigglebum 24+0 EDD 8/12/11
Minnie74 23+5 EDD 12/12/11
Lucky 22+3
Hadrian 21+5 EDD 25/12/11 next scan 15/08/11

On the grads thread too:
Owlbooty - baby#1 41+2 weeks EDD 7th August
PrettyVacant - baby#1 38+3 weeks EDD 28th August
OrangeGloss ? baby#1 37+2 weeks EDD 4th September
Wombat33 - baby#1 36+3 weeks EDD 10 September
Daisybell - baby#1 36+0 weeks EDD 13 September
PinkFondantFancy - baby#1 34+0 weeks EDD 25 September
Mamapower - Baby#1 34+0 weeks EDD 28 September
A lovely bunch of coconuts baby #2 33+3 weeks EDD 1 october
Emoo - baby#2 32+4 weeks EDD 7 October
Tunnocksteacake - baby#2 30+1weeks EDD 24th October
Hotnspicyonions - baby#2 30+1 weeks EDD 24th October
Velvetcu - baby#1 30+0 wks EDD 25th October
MummyAbroad baby #2 28+4 wks EDD 4th November
CEP baby #2 28+3 wks EDD 5th Nov
Katherine2008 baby#2 27+5 EDD 10 November
Collieandpup baby #1 26+2 wks EDD 20th Nov
Wombatinwaiting - baby # 1 25+5 wks EDD 24th November
LaraMi baby #1 25+4 weeks EDD 25th November
Izzy - baby #3 25+3 wks EDD 26th November
Bigmacandhappymeal - baby#1 25+0 weeks EDD 29th November
Blackkat - baby #1 24+1 wks EDD 5th December
Harassedandherbug - baby #4 21+5 wks EDD 22 December
Dooscooby - baby #1 21+5 wks EDD 22 December
Youremindmeofthebabe Baby#2 19+6 EDD 5th Jan

In our thoughts and prayers
Dachs whose beautiful little babies Alexander & Felicia left this world sleeping

Thinking of.... ladybee; digi; A&R; barbie; MumTum; Knitter, Kat2504, Mistress P, willitbe, twittwoo, Lily06, doitnicely

Hi Doitnicely sorry to hear you are going through this again but good to see it is going quickly and that you are feeling positive about the next step.

I had the miscarriage confirmed this morning and I feel the same. A little more detached this time, rather than the shock, horror and grief of the last one. The only thing I do find frustrating is that I feel that I have lost a few months again. I don't have children and have just turned 37 and I am aware that time is moving on. I feel you have the right attitude though, it is lovely to have one child already and hopefully you will soon have another successful pregnancy. Sod the age difference.

Thanks all of you, for being so supportive biscuits, LAF, moomin, stitch, LAF, velvet, scooby, milky, Collie, Shell and anyone else I have missed. It really has been great to have people to talk to who can relate to what we are going through. Great to be sitting in EPU and reading that people are sending me virtual hugs (thanks Scooby!).

I am waiting until the hospital get back to me re a day for the ERPC. I am bleeding so there is a possibility it might happen before I get to that stage but I am hoping it won't be too hideous. My next date with the NK cells specialist is on the 9th Sept so I guess I will find out then what if anything I can do differently next time and also when I can try again. Under treatment apparently there is an 85% success rate for women with high nk cells so I just guess I have to keep on going.

In the meantime I will be lurking and hoping everything goes ok with everyone else. Thanks again for all the support and good luck everyone. Remember that you are very very likely to go on and have successful pregnancies xxx

Freelance Sorry to hear your news. I know though that in a way you had been waiting for confirmation so I am glad that you know the answer, but sorry it was the wrong answer (if that makes sense). I hope they can get you in for an ERPC quickly - I think you said you would like so that they could run tests? I hope that this can at least provide some answers for you so that the next time you get all the support and care you possibly can, and the very best and most appropriate medical assistance.

Your positive outlook has really taught me a thing or two and I should thank you for that (although of course I wish you weren't having to beat the odds with positivity).

Velvet and Collie are right - we have had some really bad luck on this thread just recently and I'm really sorry that so many people are going through such rubbishness.

I also hope that those that have had cause to leave us recently are back soon with super sticky beans. You're all still in our thoughts. Do take care xx

Thanks Biscuits! I am also off to try lose some of this baby/miscarriage/steroid/eating myself silly weight. If I find myself back here after my next bout of SWI (whenever that is) I will be employing my pet name of Celery for you to help me in my quest :)