Fantastic 40+ thread - part 4

[hippychick66]

Come on ladies - you know who you are .......

Hello ladies - can I join? I am 42 and would like to have number 2.

Some advice needed - probably TMI but here goes - I was assuming that I was going into my most fertile period (12 days after period) but cervical secretions are not stretchy etc - assuming that hormones are not rising at the time I thought they would? Any thoughts greatly appreciated!

Herecomesthesun I am sooooo pleased to hear your news. I think you posted way back in June. Great to hear from you again - good timing for us all. We've taken a battering recently.

hopskipandjump welcome! I'm certainly no expert, but as far as I can make out people don't necessarily ovulate at the same time each month. It's safest to do OPKs or take your temperature and moniter the rise. Stretchy stuff is sometimes hard to come by (excuse the double entendre) and some people use a product called Preseed to help make things nice and welcoming for the swimmers. There is loads of stuff on the net about checking ovulation times. Babydust to you in large sprinkles.

Gum my AMH levels as of November were 1.75 . Last April my LH was 2.8, FSH 3.2 and progesterone 63. So - not much different from you, and I know just how you feel. I'm taking comfort from herecomesthesun's posting and the fact that AMH isn't particularly accurate. That said, I've got an appointment next week to recheck all those levels and to have a scan to work out if anything's blocked etc. I am going to ask about having some eggs harvested over the next few months so that I know more about the quality and can maybe freeze a couple of goodies. Just in case. It's expensive, though, so I've got to be 100% sure that it's useful to know.

Panashe you are NOT selfish. You are sensible. You're 42. You don't have the time to fanny around waiting for the ideal moment, whenever that is. I simply cannot see how it would jeopardise your custody chances - and although you're stressed, it is providing another focus. I know that dp's ex said exactly the same. I wasn't allowed to see his dd for a year and they had to go to a mediator before she would see sense. 2 years on and she's far more settled (although she still drinks, which is worrying when dd is with her half the week). The breakthrough came when she found a new man (and needed us for childcare!). I hope your case sorts itself out quickly. Big hug (()).

Italian I can't tell you how delighted I am to hear of Desiree. Go girl!! x

Right - the Eat, Pray, Love holiday! Yoga at 7:30 am, 3 hours of creative writing with a prize-winning novelist, big veggie lunch, then beach, massage/therapy and taverna till the wee hours. For 10 days!!! Ok, so I ditched the yoga after day 4 (come on - it was 7:30 am!) but I really enjoyed the thai yoga massage. I told the masseuse that I wanted another baby and she said she'd work on my energy lines, so fingers crossed. Exdp texted me EVERY DAY from South Africa, where, far from getting it on with Miss Stunning, he struggled to find conversation. Turns out she's a control freak with a distinct lack of sense of humour. Result! I'm following The Rules this time. I don't text/phone unless he does; I'm a little too busy to see him etc. It seems to be working at the moment .

Lol you're FAB !!! Stick to the rules..love it

Really tired, will catch up more tmrw xx

Hello everyone

Sorry i've gone so quiet - i guess i'm just listening rather than saying much. i'm keeping an eye on you all and praying for lots of good stuff for you all.

in many ways i feel like a bit if a fake being on here at all as i'm still umming and arring about what to do next re egg donation - whilst you're all actually doing stuff ... i guess i'm just a bit earlier in the journey....

i called my consultant again on Thursday for clarification of my results rarlier this month (its hard to take everything in at the time). Lovely nurse told me that AMH v v low - and scan showed little/no egg reserve - so i am sure i'm looking at egg donation (they hinted that there was little chance in any stimulation of my own eggs).

so i'm now officially looking at clinics - called two (Guys and LWC - no answer from either ). but also checked out IVI Spain online - am going to pluck up the courarge to call them on Monday about an appointment.

Its weird, but i'm assuming that i will be up the duff by Chrismtas - what's that about?

Lots of love to you all

xxx

That's the way Pocket - assuming you will be pregnant by Christmas is a great way to go. The power of positive thinking goes a long, long way.

Lol - you are an amazing woman! I love that exdp texted you daily- definitely a result! Yes! I'm really interested to see what you'll find out about freezing your eggs.

I'm of your fabulous holiday. Sounds so wonderful.

This next bit is long and boring, so feel free to stop reading now

I've started day-dreaming about donor eggs and adopting embryos, which iscompletely nutty! Especially as DH said yesterday:"I'm a bit concerned about how amorous you are lately, it feels like you are trying for a baby".
My response was, "Did I tell you I didn't want to try again?"
He said ,"no"
My response:"exactly! I still feel the same way, so yes, I'm trying again".
He said, "I thought we were waiting for test results", and I said"Yes, we are, so be ready to discuss it soon, because those results will be in soon".

I'm dreading it. I've been over this with DH so many times. I don't know why he thinks I'd change my mind - maybe he thinks having two miscarriages will sway me. But if anything, I'm more determined than ever. I still really struggle to understand him. I mean, both times I was pregnant, he wasn't happy, but he was accepting. Even happily accepting last time. However he did tell me when I lost the baby, that he didn't feel any differently than he did with the first miscarriage (no attachment to the baby).

I also don't really know what difference the results will make? I suppose if it comes back that the baby was normal, then we can say, it wasn't chromosomol, so we can look for other reasons, and hopefully treatment will save another baby from miscarriage, or, if it is a chromosomol thing, we'll say, well, maybe it won't happen again, or maybe DH will say, we shouldn't take the chance again, because our chances of chromo issues are too high...I just don't know. It's worrying me, because either way, it doesn't matter to me, I just want to at least give it a go...

Oh - Lol - found this thread about AMH, which was very interesting - her's went up!:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1275565-AMH-level-actually-went-UP

Rushes in to the snug to find the dog lead...

Gum so pleased to read that thread! Im starting DHEA today and praying for a rise in quality. Watch this space...

Panashe hope you got a great night's sleep :-)

Pocket you think you're a fraud? At least you have a partner to try with...

Love to all - gotta go - x

Hi guys - so much I want to say but still no feckin' internet at flat. Using ds1 Android And someones wifi so will be quick. I am trying to keep up and will defo return. Sorry to hear about the mc panashe - I think italiaan now has a donor - whoop whoop. All is good here - love to all. X

Hi all
Lovely to see u Hippy. hope u re settling in well?
LOL holiday sounds chilled. Well done u on playing the LONG game.
Pocket only u can decide what/ when's the right time for u.
Gum. lots of cuddles and love to u.
Italilan I m getting very excited for u . Whoop whoop. Hope things fly by now.
Hi Diege hope u re surviving school holidays ?
Hi Curly x
Hi everyone else hope all are well? I m fine here knackered but fine!!! Just got back from a busy weekend in London love it to visit but love to return home!!! Saw " million dollar quartet" ok but my folks knew more of the music as was from the fifties!!! This was an " extra" cheapie weekend as we were in London 2 months ago and wanted to get an extra one in before October so to keep the price down " million dollar quartet" was 1 of the cheapest shows. Went to Little Venice on a canal trip to Camden which was fab. Visited the Imperial war museum , china town ( again) which was crap!!! Did Hampstead heath and a couple of pubs from a book we ve been following in different places !!!

Very good but the bloody police sirens are never ending reminds me not to whinge about the 2 dogs we hear barking from our house!!!
On AL this week but stuff on!!! Got my GTT tomorrow so can t eat or drink ( nightmare) after 9 pm tonight!!! Will find it hard to go without a drink ( water, realise I sound Lund an alcho!!!)
Love to all xxx

Where's everyone gone???

I'm still here AngelGeorgie. But I have to run - working today. I have the mother of all headcolds, and would rather slip back into bed...but, no, I shall soldier on.
How did the GTT go?
Great to hear from you Hippy. Looking forward to an update.

Will drop in later. Hoping I'll hear from my doctor today with the pathology results, but not holding my breath. I have an appointment with her tomorrow morning, so maybe she'll have them then.

Nice to hear from you Gum hope u re headache improves soon. GTT was fine get my results next week when I see my consultant I don t expect a raised blood sugar as never had any problems with my previous bloods or urinalaysis. Awake at stupid o clock partly due to our cat whinging but also currently feel very scared. I feel like I did straight after loosing Georgie incredibly scared that nothing will ever work out again. I try not to focus on having GILS home with us but just occasionally my mind lapses and gets carried away and I can envisage the section and hearing GILS cry but then I become enveloped in a cloud of fear. I just wish it was Oct now but on the other hand I want to push dates out of my mind. Sometimes, if I allow it , the fear is so bad I feel it will paralyse me. So, I ve got up think I ll read as a distraction therapy. Xx

Hello! So hard to get on at the moment with dds off school (end is in sight - just next week's Whitby hol to get through!).
Angel you poor thing I don't know what to say really other than reassure you that what you are feeling is totally normal and to be expected. Are you getting much support from your mws? I know someone on another thread in a similar situation to yourself who is having weekly visits which are helping. Hang on in there xxx
Gum sounds like you will be getting your results very soon and that they will help to rationalise the mc(s) (if that is ever possible). I've never had anything meaningful back from my tests but I get the feeling they just look for very basic stuff here on the NHS.
THings ok here, pretty tired especially after day out to theme park yesterday. Have mw appointment this afternoon, then will need anti-D injection at hospital (routine) either tomorrow or Thurs which will be fun with the dds in tow .
Love to all - and great to hear from you Hippy!!!

Thanks Diege only seeing my MW about once a month. Can see her more often if I want but it doesn t really help. I had re- referred myself back to my counsellor but I missed 2 appts with work and one was on the day we had to have Scottie put to sleep. So I would have to re- referr myself , wait for appt etc.... Need to give myself a good talking to . Think it's exacerbated this week as I m on AL . Normally I ve got lots to think about at work but this week I ve nothing mentally to focus on. Even thought about cancelling the rest of my AL running up to my mat leave but physically I need the rest. Good luck with jabs. Am seeing my MW tomorrow for the norm; bp, urnalysis etc... Xx

Could your mw help with the referral do you think, or maybe someone at work could help cut throguh some of the bureaucracy? I know nothing about still-birth/bereavement, but would imagine it's something that is taken very seriously in the next pregnancy by health professionals who will recognise your emotional needs as your pregnancy progresses. How have you found SANDS? Might it be worth having a quick chat with them? I can imagine how your thoughts must be overwhelming now, and how difficult it must be to step out of what's going on in your head xxx Sorry in advance if anything I've said is wrong/insensitive/naive.

Don t worry you haven t said anything insensitive. In my experiences as many midwives are out of their depth with experiences of stillbirth she wouldn t be able to acess my work counselling services any quicker as it's via occupational health. SANDS are ok I ve spoke to them on the phone a couple of times I found they were ok but that was that. There is a SANDS group in Leeds somewhere butt one experience of a bereavement group was more like a coffee morning.. Think I just need to get myself through this at the moment.funnily enough only time will help. Thanks Diege hope u re ok ? Xx

Think you're right there Angel. Do you have a date for your section yet, or is this decided a little later?
I'm fine thanks, though will feel better after my mw appointment. For no good reason I do get incredibly nervous about them, especially the measuring/heartbeat thing. Blood being taken is fine!

Hi everyone - I have just bought a clearblue fertility monitior - has anyone used one of these? heard any success stories??

Hi Hop! No, not used one of these myself but at least one other person on this thread has (Beattie??). Hopefully they'll be able to advise.
Mw visit fine . Nasty mw still on hols (that's 4 weeks!!! maybe she's left???) and really nice one today. Found hb straight away (144>160bpm), baby breech (fine for now) and measuring spot on for dates. He seems 'average' size at the moment, but told they don't really start packing it on (if they're going to) until about 32 weeks. Have anti-D jab on Thursday at 9am which will be fun, then not back with mw until mid-september.

Whoop whoop Diege Such great news! All right, girls, we can let that mw out of the snug cleaning cupboard now

Lol. How are things with you? Did you seduce xdp at the 'right time' as planned?

Evening everyone! Just popping in to say a quick 'hi'. I was trying to read up and catch up with you all properly but admit to having been (almost) totally distracted by 'Seven Dwarves'.. OMG, from my scanning of the past couple of months I can see it is as busy as ever in here. Hugs, kisses, babydust and fireflies to you all. I'm off to bed now but I'll try harder tomorrow and give you a more meaningful update tomorrow. xx

Diege yes have a date for my section: 17th October I ll be 37 weeks, 3 days. Only 8 weeks to go I think. It's my late nan' s birthday which is fine October will always be a bitter sweet month for me and Ant. Ant's dad died in October, 10 th is Georgie' s birthday and hopefully the 17 th will be a happy occasion. Glad alls well with your MW visit. Seeing mine in the morning. Know what you mean u always check GILS heartbeat before I go , don't want any nasty surprises.
Hi 1000 x
Lol will you lock my paranoia and nerves in your cupboard with diege's midwife please?? X

just wrote long post and it disappeared ...... Will try again

Good morning !!

Glad to hear all is well with your pregnancies Diege and Angel although I'm sorry to hear how anxious you're feeling Angel I remember being at the stage you're at and being worried and that was with no history to worry about. I hope you're ok, I guess sometimes you feel numb and that you are going through the motions and just want it to be October. Work is a distraction as long as you don't over do it... Hope your family and friends can distract you too

Italian any news ?

I had a bfn on Monday so seeing that as a positive sign ! I've got another 2 hour interview with ss today...last week they wanted to know what A levels I had ffs !! When my sister adopted I know they got frustrated sometimes about all the questioning but i guess they do it with good intention.