Freak Out Room For Those Newly Updiffed After M/C Part VII

[Blackkat]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the previous thread

Congrats on the good scan yesterday purple.
Have fun meeting up wiw & lara
Fab to hear from hairy and hadrian. Have you been to the docs yet hairy? In my area you can get a referral for the 12 wk scan separate from the booking in, so perhaps you could get the scan organised through your doc without having to do the booking in thing yet?

So I did my 1st pg yoga last night - had to introduce myself to the others and say how I'd been feeling which made me feel a bit nervous, I'm not used to being public about my pg yet, I need to get over it!

hi everyone im still here too, spent last weekend in hospital on a drip as i was soo sick and have been put on cyclazine 50mg but ofcourse now im not feeling sick i just dont feel pg, no sign of a bump yet, got a scan in 2 weeks but it feels like forever away and im mentalling like crazy, mil diagnosed with skin cancer and had op yesterday so dp stressed doing his own job 7 til 5 and covering for mil in the eavening, my sister is 8 wk pg and really exited but im just dreading watching her get bigger if i lose this one i really need some positive vibes, i hope 2 weeks goes quickly x

Oh layla sorry to hear that you've been so unwell and had all of those other things to deal with. I can understand that you probably don't feel very pg now that your sickness has faded, although I was never as sick as you've been, mine did fade at 10 wks and lots of others say that too.

That must be difficult having your sister so close to you in terms of dates - is she sympathetic to your situation?

I hope the 2 weeks to your scan pass as quickly as they can, although given how ill you've been do you think the epu would look kindly on you and given you a scan sooner?

Hi thanks for messages.

I am really badly traumatised by Epu/miscarriages - i literally freak out when soho to the hospital - so have decided not to use Nhs services until after I've had an eleven or twelve week scan privately. If all is well at next (private) scan then I'll book in. I'll probably then have a private nuchal scan.

I just don't know when to go for next scan. I have to be in the right frame of mind to potentially hear bad news.

I also have to have a clear enough working week to have things dealt with if it is bad news. I feel right now that it would properly break me so I'd rather put it off til I feel better.

I've been to Glastonbury and that was kind of as far as I was thinking so it's hard to make any decisions now. I had vaguely decided to re scan after we got back but now I'm scared.

hi doo
my sister is not very sympathetic to be honest she had an ectopic pg a few months ago and had a scan at 6 weeks and is due another on friday they think its twins so she is shouting from the rooftops she is quite naiive and tells me all the time im worrying for no reason, she is one of those annoying people who posts every symptom on facebook.
my epu are quite strict and only scan when there is pain and bleeding and only with referral from the gp wich is a pain as my gp is a t*a- last time i bled i asked for a hcg check and he wouldnt do one he just told me to do a pregnancy test, also when i was ttc i went to him with some concerns and he told me to use contriception so i would have no worries, im considering going to a different gp surgery,
im just going to stick it out and try to forget im pregnant for a bit, thats kindof why ive not been on here for a while x

Ps: bump wise. Should I have developed any kind of discernible bump by now? Sometimes I think I have and other times I don't think so. I have veiny boobies but hardly sore at all now and the sickness has gone completely.

hi hairy just my opinion but are you ever going to be in the right frame of mind to get bad news? i think you should just dive in and get a scan, if all is well it will help a lot but if its bad news its better to know sooner so you can work out where to go from here as atm yosu are proberbly feeling a bit in limbo, i think id rather get it over and done with asap HTH X

Ok it's still me harassed/pants, but changed my name again. Just wasn't sure of the last version!!

layla it's sounds horrendous! I'm glad you're feeling a bit better, although the situation with your sister sounds tough. Your gp sounds like an arse!!

doo you're not in hampshire by some strange coincidence are you?? Sounds spookily like my first prg yoga last Wednesday and she also does a Monday class.... How weird would that be?!!

hairy bump-wise it varies so much lovely, so don't read anything into that. This is my 4th dc and I'm huge at 14+5. But I'm also a size 14-16 so that adds to it!!! Veiny boobs are good. You can't read anything into lack of symptoms at this stage as the placenta has pretty much taken over. I wish I could say something to make it all right!!!!! I really think you should get a scan lovely.

HI all - I am delurking myself temporarily as well to say hi to everyone and congrats on the good scans. I had my 20 wk scan yesterday and everything was fine. Phew..!!

Hairy - my co-freaker outer at scans - you know I completely sympathise with how you fee. I really think all you can do is just bite your lip, think about something else, sing a song in your head, shut your eyes, and just attempt to get through it any way you can. Plus, agree that symptoms do fluctuate loads, especially from around 9 wks, and that bumps come and go because at that stage, it's basically your guts pushed out of place and so most of the "bump" is actually wind..!

Congrats on the scan starkadder.
Sorry to hear that your sister isn't that great about things layla - I can only imagine how tough that must be. I hate the fb antics too - grrr! Do whatever gets you through the next 2 weeks and we'll be here if/when you need us!
harassed pleased you've got your name back! I'm not in hampshire no, but it's funny we had similar experiences though. Are you gonna stick with the yoga do you think?
hairy - feel free to ignore or tell me where to go, but I really think you need to brave booking your 12 wk private scan now. It's so hard when you're living short-term and focusing on getting to the next thing/milestone (in your case glasto). You can then suddenly feel all unprepared when that thing passes and things don't appear to have gone disastrously wrong (I'm the same after the trip). You're never going to be able to plan for the bad news, even though I completely understand the trying. If you're going private then you can try to pick the best time possible for you and you should get sensitive treatment. Re the bump - mine is little but fluctuates loads, I convinced myself it had disappeared completely at the wedding (clearly this had nothing to do with the scary bridesmaid freaking me out with her silly questions!!). My boobs stopped hurting around 12 and sickness went around 10 I think, so try not to worry about those things too much (she says!).

Thank you all. You're all very wise.

I'm going to bite my lip and sing a song and take Starkys advice.

Of course I will book a scan in the next week or so ... but I'm better off booking it at short notice so I dont have days to wait.

I have been told the midwives will think it odd not to have booked in before 12 weeks but I don't care. I wasn't very impressed with the last booking in, I thought the midwife was very disinterested and vague. And I can have bloods etc that they do any time after 12 weeks i guess?

I don't know at what point I'm going to be able to relax - I have to take it on step at a time ... Or I will go truly mad.

It sound odd but meditating has helped ... And I have been asking
my baby if he/ she is ok and have been feeling re-assured that he / she is (yes, I'm an odd bod but it has helped me feel calmer).

This pregnancy I have prayed that if it goes wrong I mc naturally rather than "silently". It's truly horrible when you have no clue that it's wrong til you're scanned, which has happened 3G to me in the last year.

Thanks for letting me vent my feelings . Thank god for this thread.

Hi ladies!

Am also still here but was away with work at the end of last week so hard to post. Have had my scan and it went well! The little bean was moving around so much which was really surreal and great to see. I am 11 + 3 so bang on what it was from my early scan (although now am freaking I won't have been scanned at 12 weeks and what if I have a MMC by then!???) NT measurement good but waiting on the blood results.

Hope everyone is well. I have had a manic day at work so not had a chance to catch up with reading for the last few days so will do so later. Just updating the list with my new EDD.

xxx

Tuesday 28th June

Lovemysleep 25+0 EDD 11/10/11
Hils74 20+6 EDD 8/11/11
Katherine2008 20+5 EDD 10/11/11
Haffertee 20+3 EDD 14/11/11
Ninunina: 20+0 EDD 15/11/11
delilahbelle 19+5 EDD 22/11/11
Mattsmama 19+5 EDD 17/11/11
Banana87 19+0 EDD 22/11/11
Bigmacsauce 18+0 EDD 29/11/11 Next scan 11/7/11
Blackkat 17+1 EDD 5/12/11 Next scan 26/07/11
Jigglebum 16+5 EDD 8/12/11
Minnie74 16+3 EDD 12/12/11
Lucky 15+1
Dooscooby 14+5 EDD 22/12/11
Harassed 14+5 EDD 22/12/11
Hadrian 14+2 EDD 25/12/11 next scan 15/08/11
Youremindmeofthebabe 12+5 EDD 5/1/11 next scan 19/8/11
Updiffed 12+3
Freezingmyarseoff 12+3 scan 5/7/11
Milkyways 12+2 EDD 08/01/12 Next scan 04/07/11
Bump 11+3 EDD 14/01/12
Hairylights 11+1
Mamarara 10+5
Lily06 10+5 Next scan 12/07/11
Pigletmania 10+3
Laylasmummy09 10+2
purpletoes 7+5 EDD 09/02/12
willitbe 6+4
MrsSteph 6+3 Next scan 13/07/11
Shellshock7 4+6 EDD 29/02/12

On the grads thread too:

Nickster 34+3 EDD 7/8/11
Orange 30+1 EDD 4/9/11
Wombat33 29+3 EDD 10/09/11
Daisybell 28+5 EDD 14/09/11
Pinkfondantfancy 27+3 EDD 25/09/11
Tiggersreturn (TTT) 27+1 EDD 26/09/11
mamapower 26+4 EDD 28/9/11
ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts 26+3 EDD 01/10/11
Emoo 25+5 EDD 7/10/11
Tunnocksteacake 23+2 EDD 24/10/11
Onions 3+1 EDD 24/10/11
IreneHeron 23+0 EDD 23/10/11
Velvetcu 23+0 EDD 25/10/11
MummyAbroad 21+4 EDD 4/11/11
CEP 21+3 EDD 5/11/11
CollieandPup 19+2 EDD 20/11/11 next scan 6/7/2011
wombatinwaiting: 18+5 EDD 24/11/11
LaraMi 18+4 EDD 25/11/11 Next scan 20/07/11
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy 18+1 EDD 26/11/11

In our thoughts and prayers
Dachs whose beautiful little babies Alexander & Felicia left this world sleeping

Thinking of.... ladybee; digi; A&R; barbie; MumTum; Knitter, Kat2504, Mistress P

hello all
I've been lurking a bit but feeling bad for not posting - sorry.

There's so much to catch up on!!

Bumpgrowing great news on the scan. yay

Hairy sorry you sound rather stressed and I'm bit worried about you. Although I realise you need to do what feels best for you so do just ignore this if you want. Can arrange to see a different midwife to the one you saw last time? I always ask which midwives are available and only make appts with the ones I like as some of them can definitely be unsympathetic. Perhaps there are specialist midwives or nurses who have more time to listen to your concerns?

Am v about Glastonbury, tell me more. I'm rather curious about beyonce (not that I'm a fan) but did you see her? I wondered if she got got good reviews or not

Layla your GP sounds rubbish TBH, I would definitely look into changing. Can you see a different GP in the same practice, might be easier to try that first before changing practices.

I'm afraid I'm not even going to attempt to catch with everyone this time but will try to stay up to date from now on. Got to get some fresh air before picking up DD, in the hope my pukey-ness will go away.

big waves to all xxx

Thanks freezing

I have only evrer met one midwife and can't remember her name. She seemed rather bored by the whole thing. She gave rather odd answers. I asked exactly what cheese to avoid and she said "posh ones" - the correct answer being "unpasteurised ones and blue/mouldy ones".

I am stressed but I'm better off venting here than keeping it all in.

I didn't enjoy glasto this year - I was scared to walk too far and was obviously not drinking and the mud spoiled it - I didn't really want to be there but had promised to go to help my sis with her boy (that part was lovely - he's six months old and he loved it!!)

Hi shell and mrsateph. Hope you have uneventful and boring 9 months!

Brilliant news on scans lady and purple and starkadder and bump!

Hope the grand updiffed meet up was fun wiw and Lara.

Nice to hear from you guys hairy and Hadrian.
Layla what a stressful time - hope you are ok. Your gp sounds like a total asshat.

Sorry to hear you are so stressed out hairy a good midwife does make a big difference though.

I have my scan date - next Tuesday and am bricking it. Am I allowed a week of mentalling? I feel like they are going to tell me I am a fraud and theres nothing there and I am basically just a weirdo. Argh.

evening ladies.

welcome shell and mrssteph congratulations.

so pleased for good scan news.

hairy mine's nice, but very blase and never answers texts which can be very frustrating. I'm the opposite with scans i can't relax without them, but i can understand the worry beforehand. i'm always scared before i go in.

mamarama consider yourself haddocked, but yes you can mentalise as much as you need

he is deffinitely a waste of space he is the gp who saw mil and told her that her cancer was just a fatty lump and wouldnt refer her to anyone, she got a 2nd opinion and the 2nd doctor told her that anyone with half a brain would have known it was cancerous and of course this wasted valuable time in getting diagnosed he needs sorting it makes me so there is a 3 month waiting list to see any of the other doctors.

mamarama good luck with your scan tuesday i hope you can relax a bit between mentalling moments.

layla has your mil or family made a formal complaint about this gp???

laylas your GP is a gradeA Arse change practice or GP, seriously! Sorry to hear you've been feeling so rotten. Thinking of you.

Hairy, I didn't book in until 12+1 and NHS NT scan at 13+4, my midwife was lovely, knew all about what I'd been through to that point, and she has booked me in for reassurance appointments at 19 and 22 weeks so I can hear the heartbeat again. (I could go every week if I wanted but I thought that was trading on her goodwill a little too much). She also answered all 7 of my dumb questions that I had on my list, and even made me laugh (in a nice way) and my mentalling. So, I was terrified and waited until late to sort it all, but my experience couldn't have been more positive. I really hope you get the same. ((hugs))

mamarara mentalling is only permitted in the 24hrs before, so considered yourself well and truly thwacked with this haddock!!

Starky nice to see you again, so pleased 20 wk went well!

hadrian lovely to hear from you too!!, Bump too so glad scans went well.

I went to aqua biffer this evening, I was the least pregnant person there, but it was brilliant. I'd highly recommend it, I have so much more energy because of it, though I could eat a horse!!

to harassed (great new name!) scoobs, Collie, cep Milky, Minnie, Lily* and to everyone else

Hope lara and WiW aren't living it up too much this evening!!

Hi everyone

sorry I've not been posting for a while- a friend's dad has been really poorly and sadly just passed away so have been sort of preoccupied. Have tried to catch up on everything!

welcome to all the newbies- great place to freak out and share worries!

hairy your midwife sounds a bit rubbish- not particularly keen on mine either. She seem like anything is too much hassle or a bit of a ridiculous question (which admittedly some probably are )

blackkat" the aqua sounds good as does the pg yoga doo*. I feel like I should be doing something now the sickness has mostly stopped. Might help with the tiredness too. Was going to start back at zumba but the instructor says I can't now I'm pregnant. Bought some pg exercise dvds about 3 weeks ago and they're still in the wrapping- I am so lazy at the mo!

Called into M & P's the other day with DP. The sale was great but couldn't work up the courage to buy anything. Maybe later. Did buy some maternity jeans from gap which were so comfy! But turned out not to be such a good buy cos when I wore them for one evening by the end of the night they were so baggy they were nearly falling down. Anyone got any advice on where to go for good ones? My own hairband-held up ones are starting to get uncomfortable!

Thanks for haddocking - trying to talk myself down but I am going to be totally bonkers come Tuesday. Resisting the urge to google about mmc. Step away!

Layla I am outraged at the crapness of your gp. I second the call to make a complaint! How awful for you and your poor mil.

Minnie I found dorothy Perkins quite good for maternity jeans. Cheap which is good and super soft and comfy - I lived in them when pg with dd.

Have a good evening all!

Morning all! I have the worst hangover ever after larging it up over cocktails with lara..... just kidding! We had a very civilised couple of sodas and it was just fab to meet up. She is indeed as lovely in RL as she is here and it was lovely to share the hopes and fears with someone who you feel as if you know already (and no embarassing fanjo talk either). Her lovely DH came to join us for 5 mins part way through - I think partly to ensure it wasn't a scam meet-up and she was being secretly whisked away by a dodgy Arab to be sold for a couple of camels and partly to see if another mner is actually a real-life normal person (I think I passed the test ). She looked the epitome of holiday chic in lovely maxi dress and flip-flops and has the most amazing green eyes (don't think that will give away too much!). You guys should definitley get a sarf London meet-up going! She said to say hi to everyone!

WIW so glad you both had a great meet up, I'm looking forward to a real life meet up soon too, I want to put names to faces!

Minnie I got some M&P jeggings I thought they would make me look uber blimp, but they are really comfy and with under over and on bump roll will hopefully see me through. If you can find aqua blimp then I'd really recommend it, I was feeling so sluggish and tired but feel much better today and slept really well tonight. It felt amazing being in the water and the bump enjoyed it too, if the amount of wriggling is anything to go by.

Collie, Minnie, YRMOTB* you know that M&P have their "seconds" shop just off Jct 25 of the M62? I might plan a trip that way a bit further on to peruse buggies and stuff.

to everyone

Wednesday 29th June

Lovemysleep 25+1 EDD 11/10/11
Hils74 21+0 EDD 8/11/11
Katherine2008 20+6 EDD 10/11/11
Haffertee 20+4 EDD 14/11/11
Ninunina: 20+1 EDD 15/11/11
delilahbelle 19+6 EDD 22/11/11
Mattsmama 19+6 EDD 17/11/11
Banana87 19+1 EDD 22/11/11
Bigmacsauce 18+1 EDD 29/11/11 Next scan 11/7/11
Blackkat 17+2 EDD 5/12/11 Next scan 26/07/11
Jigglebum 16+6 EDD 8/12/11
Minnie74 16+4 EDD 12/12/11
Lucky 15+2
Dooscooby 14+6 EDD 22/12/11
Harassed 14+6 EDD 22/12/11
Hadrian 14+3 EDD 25/12/11 next scan 15/08/11
Youremindmeofthebabe 12+6 EDD 5/1/11 next scan 19/8/11
Updiffed 12+4
Freezingmyarseoff 12+4 scan 5/7/11
Milkyways 12+3 EDD 08/01/12 Next scan 04/07/11
Bump 11+4 EDD 14/01/12
Hairylights 11+2
Mamarara 10+6
Lily06 10+6 Next scan 12/07/11
Pigletmania 10+4
Laylasmummy09 10+3
purpletoes 7+6 EDD 09/02/12
willitbe 6+5
MrsSteph 6+4 Next scan 13/07/11
Shellshock7 5+0 EDD 29/02/12

On the grads thread too:

Nickster 34+4 EDD 7/8/11
Orange 30+2 EDD 4/9/11
Wombat33 29+4 EDD 10/09/11
Daisybell 28+6 EDD 14/09/11
Pinkfondantfancy 27+4 EDD 25/09/11
Tiggersreturn (TTT) 27+2 EDD 26/09/11
mamapower 26+5 EDD 28/9/11
ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts 26+4 EDD 01/10/11
Emoo 25+6 EDD 7/10/11
Tunnocksteacake 23+3 EDD 24/10/11
Onions 23+2 EDD 24/10/11
IreneHeron 23+1 EDD 23/10/11
Velvetcu 23+1 EDD 25/10/11
MummyAbroad 21+5 EDD 4/11/11
CEP 21+4 EDD 5/11/11
CollieandPup 19+3 EDD 20/11/11 next scan 6/7/2011
wombatinwaiting: 18+6 EDD 24/11/11
LaraMi 18+5 EDD 25/11/11 Next scan 20/07/11
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy 18+2 EDD 26/11/11

In our thoughts and prayers
Dachs whose beautiful little babies Alexander & Felicia left this world sleeping

Thinking of.... ladybee; digi; A&R; barbie; MumTum; Knitter, Kat2504, Mistress P