Relax and It'll Happen- at the BESH Spa

[starcuntmole]

Unwind and rest your weary wombles as we cater to your every relaxation need. If you've been getting stressed about failing to fertilise for what feels like five hundred years, and your follicles aren't getting any younger, we have the perfect combination of treatments to send you on your way uplifted, and updiffed.
Pampering experiences from head to toe, and all the bits in between, whose benefits stem from the combination of nature?s ingredients and our therapists? highly trained hands and tongues.
Feel the all over healing powers of touch, with one of our speciality Cuban massages (rum and cigarring compulsory) , indulge in a volcanic mud-cake wrap or lose yourself in our unique water experiences: gin jacuzzi, turkish delight baths, and enjoy the Sechseny pool staffed by our attentive in house swimmers. Finally treat yourself to a mani/pedi (polishes come in the full range of colours from Clearly Clear to Russet)

Complimentary bar.
Please note: Robes must be worn in all pubic areas.

Thanks for the droid explanation.

The jacuzzi sounds like much more fun than being in this office.

My Sympathies Eurochic. I am curious about the origins of your name btw. Are you living somewhere glamourous, with flunkies?

We have a week off this week. We decided to stay at home and do day trips instead of packing up and going away - as we have a weekend in an .. ahem.. tent to endure look forward to at the weekend and we just can't be arsed with packing and unpacking and then packing again. Today we are mainly pissing about at home, tomorrow we go to Drayton Manor and on Wed we are going to that London for the day. So despite Droid's imminent arrival I am feeling cheery.

Shlaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaags - particularly the one who was be-moaning the lack of meets outside London. boo and I are meeting on Thursday 23rd in 'Ereford if anyone is interested.

My name is an old one revived for MN because I am a regular on another message board related to my profession and needed to think of something different because I didn't want people from there stumbling across my posts over here about how much I sh@g, how long I shove my legs up in the air afterwards, and how bitter I have become through this whole process etc. I used this name years ago when I was living in Brussels for a couple of years and was the only forrin posting on an English forum. I should more accurately be Anglohen these days.

I wish I did live somewhere exotic with flunkies rather than South London with only an obviously short-sighted cleaner to help with the chores. Sigh.

Oooh Brussels y'say. Welll, I lived in Brussels, longwee lived there and one of the current CRESH does right now. Tell us more about your Brussels days.

In fact, some might link the being unceremoniously tossed out of Celtica at 7am a possible reason as to why we're infertile now.

Oh they were wonderful (although a decade ago now :( ). I lived the eurotrash existence - drinking raspberry beer, dancing to very bad europop and dating Continental men with bizarre fashion sense and appalling driving skills. You?

Reader, I married one! Not really, but lived with him for a few years - being forced to attend family functions where each and every one hid a hideous secret and they all hated each other - but it was "tradition". And being fed things like "hare with mandarin segments". But yes, same existance as you. I long for those hot, summer nights sat outside Conways again. :)

I was there 99-00, then moved to East Flanders, then NL, bought a house out near Malmedy and then 3 years ago sold up and moved back to NL.

I am of your cleaner, regardless of eyesight. Every room in my house looks like it has been ransacked by burglars :o

at you have stuff nice enough to warrant the attention of burglars?

I wish I could blame smallboo. but he is tidier than me

at all of you having cleaners and a house that isn't a building site.

My entire existence is covered in plasterdust and random fragments of copper piping.

Alpine we overlapped - I was there 00-01, first at the Commission and then at the office of a French firm in Brussels.

Those jealous of a cleaner, it is nice (I am tidy but hate cleaning), but no one else cleans your own house as well as you would. And she costs a fortune. But as I work erratic hours and travel a lot and the hubby does nothing around the house unless I suggest it, it would be a complete pit without one.

at building site house as can't get bloody plumber out so have to shower at work and clean teeth in kitchen sink.

Ooh Bootie - my deepest sympathy. I did renovation about three years ago, having been lulled into a false sense of what I could accomplish by the likes of Sarah Beany and Grand Designs. The dust... oh the dust. It is just AWFUL.

Apparently I spend too much time on mn. So, as my DP is off ill today (I am still off in the hopes that the super glue will work... this time), I'll be busted before long. Hope all is well, and if anyone fancies crossing their fingers for me for the scan tomorrow...?

Urgh. Speed reading. "fingers". "slips". "quietly". "brownie". :(

brownie Without wanting to tempt the fate of doom - it ain't fallen out has it? Or have there been "signs"?

Bites - you actually HAVE a kitchen sink This is like some horrible anti-oneupmanship of House Related Doom.

I too am showering at work. Tis a right bunch of shite that the plumber still hasn't mobilised his sorry arse though, wtf is going on there?

Brownie I shall cross everything crossable and also sacrifice some goats in your honour. This WILL work.

Thanks for asking Alps - no it hasn't fallen out yet. The others fell stopped growing at about 6 weeks (6+5 today, and re-scan tomorrow). They fell out 2-3 weeks after that. No bleeding yet, but no real pregnancy symptoms either, apart from sore breasts and "looking pregnant" according to my OH. So who fucking knows. Thanks for the good wishes guys. Really appreciate it.

Now, please excuse me, I am now about to put my fingers in my ears, and sing loudly for the rest of the evening.

Good luck for tomorrow PinkP

You are quite right boots I shall count my kitchen sink blessing, also shower at work is nicer than shower in house

goldeng sending the power of all that is good and BESH to your and you BOC. We'll all be with you at the business end tomorrow, each holding a finger. I meant that to sound touching, but I think it just might be a bit creepy

Good luck for the re scan.

But my fingers are broken Cunthedgepig...

Sorry for all house / DIY ishoos BESH. I luff our house. It's a bit knackered & only ever tidy on a Thursday but it's great.

Am off to slaughter a goat and light some candles for our Brownie now.

Browngirl, good luck my sweet. Hoping with all my hope that everything is ok xxx