Freak out room for those newly updiffed after mc - Part V

[MummyAbroad]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage? There is plenty of support, hand holding and problem-shared-problem-halved going on over here. All welcome to join in.

Great news Katherine - lovely way to start the working week.

thanks lara - try not to worry about your booking-in - I know this is the hard bit, but all the stats are on your side for a healthy pregnancy. Watch out for the flying haddocks, huh? x

Congrats Katherine on the scan. Very frustrating visit to the hosp for me, 45 min wait in a room full of heavily preg women. They kept asking me whether I'd brought my book or why didn't I have a book. Then when they finally called me in they said the consultant was sick and they couldn't fo anything for me and that I'd have to come back in Friday.

So, we'd both taken the day off work to attend and will have to take more time off on Friday, as well as having another few days to worry like mad.

Fingers crossed that minnie had a great scan.

Can I join the ?I hate work gang? too? I normally love like my job but I?m a manager in the NHS and the scale and speed of change is dumfounding. Everything is chaos so getting any work done that actually makes a difference is all but impossible, combined with facing redundancy just means I hate being at work at the moment. My pg and Nov mat leave will probably make my job less secure in the long term as I think jobs will be there for people who can be seen (and not at home out of mind), but in all honesty I just can?t wait to be off and away from it all. I think its also very sad to think about what should have been - I?d have been due in July so would very much be planning my exit already! I had a meeting this morning too with a colleague who announced her pg on my first day back after my mc ? she?s about a week ahead of what would have been my dates. She?s a lovely person so I?ve been nothing but thrilled for her since finding out, but seeing her big bump is so hard ? baby was kicking lots today too . It sometimes seems so unfair. But at least I have this pg to obsess and mental about be thankful for.

scooby that?s dreadful about the scan ? how terrible. And they couldn?t have contacted you earlier given you appointments was at 3pm? Or they don?t have someone covering the sick consultants appointments?!!! So frustrated for you.

Katherine yay for the great scan and low NT measurements. Great news.

lara glad you had a lovely break ? being away helps with the mentalling doesn?t it? Stay away from the mc threads. I?ve done the same thing and it just stresses you out. I don?t know how I?d have got through the past 5 months without mn, but hearing about everyones horror stories is really a downside to being on here as you just know exactly what can go wrong ? but remember, the majority of women have healthy pg they?re just not on here to read about.

harassed sorry you?ve been having cramps. I had LOTS of pains and cramps early on in all sorts of forms ? aches, crampy feelings, sharp pains both in stomach and back ? but all ok.

Pink poor you being sick ? how awful. Glad that all seems well after your scan but sorry you haven?t got all the reassurances you need. I?ve never had a private scan, so tomorrow will be interesting to compare.

mummyasorry you are having a bit of spotting and cramps. I know it must be very disconcerting, but fx its nothing to worry about. There is nothing I can say as reassurance that you haven?t already said to so many of us on here, just try to stay positive. I think there?s nothing wrong with putting it to the back of your mind.
Speaking of shitting NHS service, I didn?t mention that in my letter it also informed me that if I want a scan photo it will cost me £4.50 (for one)?? daylight robbery. I am appalled ? anyone else have to pay this?

That?s for all your views on the scan. Def still going to go, that way if all is ok I can tell the friends I am travelling with that I am pg too without either having to make excuses about not drinking or telling them and worrying it will all go wrong. I?m not too worried about the ms fading (quite glad in fact), I remembered that mummya had said her symptoms faded at about 9 ½ weeks, which I?m quite pleased with myself for as my symptoms stopped at 10 weeks last time just after it had all gone wrong. But I still have other symptoms like insomnia, constipation (driving me crazy), tiredness, always thirsty, always hungry (although perhaps that?s just me being greedy).

No news from Minnie? Thinking of you, hope the scan is going well.

Great news Katherine! Stop freaking out though, and stay AWAY from the mc forum. Remember (unfortuantely), there are a few % of people who miscarry after seeing a heartbeat...YOU will NOT be one of them. Deep breaths.

Lara Try not to worry (rich coming from me!). You will be FINE.

Fingers crossed dooscooby had a good scan.

I have booked a scan for tomorrow at 4:30. We are going to Cornwall tomorrow and I have a booking in appt next week so want/need to know that things are progressing as they should. Still feeling sick, but better. Off to take a anti-nausea pill :)

mummya sorry you're getting cramps and spotting. hope it settles down for you.

katherine yay for great scan results.

scooby how annoying, that really is bad service.

collie we have to pay £4. (thanks for the pep talk just listen to your own wise words. )

keeping fx for minnie

just come back from dr, nothing in urine so no infection. I queried if it might be connected to the bv i keep getting, she said it might be as bv can cause discomfort, so i have some more of the cream i had before.

What a lovely long post, Collie....

Have slapped myself hard on the head with a sea anemone (sp) - I won't go anywhere near the MC threads again. Just far too depressing for starters.

I too saw on my scan letter that there was a charge for photos - might be about £3 if I recall (only cos I remember thinking we'd take a tenner - one for DH, one for me and a spare one for me just in case I lose the first one haha!)

I also have insomnia, constipation, tiredness, always thirsty, always hungry and I get up three times each night minimum to pee. In fact, I have developed an attractive new habit. As I have the remnants of a cough, I now have an attractive cough-wee (i.e. you cough and a drop of wee comes out)!!! I am damned glamorous! Anyone else got a cough- or sneeze-wee?

Collie so pleased you had a good holiday - we're mid restructure at the work at the moment, and just wanted to let you know about rights if you off on mat leave. Essentially, you are the queen of everyone. If there are a group of you competing for a few jobs and you are off on mat leave, you get first refusal before anyone else. Seriously. Your rights to a continuing role (should you want one) are the best of any employee if you are off on mat leave. Might be worth checking this in your "change" policy.

(realise this might not be want you want to hear if work is so pants!)

Go for you scan, it's worth having that peace of mind before you head to Belfast.

irene, pink hoping that you are being well looked after in "sick bay", that made me chuckle mummya

mummya sorry to hear about the spotting etc. I asked my consultant last week about goo and he was so laid back about it, essentially if you're not bleeding through pads, it doesn't smell bad or itch, he was sure it would be ok.

Lara - I thought you didn't feel pregnant?? You've just listed a whole boat load of symptoms. It's the peeing in the night that gives it away., and the knackeredness, constipation, thirstiness...

And I fully accept the fish, I will join the list!!

Katherine good news on the nuchal measurement.

Doo what a crappy experience, so annoyed for you, will be thinking of you on Friday.

Minnie hoping all ok with you?

Battery I agree with mummya Friday probably seems a long way away, but six weeks is a good time to go to see that heartbeat. Thinking of you.

to Cep, Harassed, Izzy, Dachs and to everyone else

Wonder what stories owl will tell us about Belgian storks when she gets back??

Too much chatter...I'm way behind!!

Hurray!! for great NT results Irene and Katherine that's great news . Anyone heard from minnie yet?

battery glad the brown has stopped, honestly I have had it in all my pgs and it hasn't been a problem so fx it's ok for you too. Friday must seem ages away but 6 weeks is a good time to go.

doo sorry it didn't happen for you today, how annoying, esp that they couldn't let you know beforehand

pink Sorry pinkbean didn't play ball, he's probably just giving you a chance for another scan next week. In all seriousness though, the measurements you got were fine and all other scans have been fine so I'm sure it'll be fine next week x

mummya sorry about the spotting, glad you seem calm though, medical profession seem v blasé about spotting and I'm sure after all your good scans it's ok. Hope you manage to keep calm x When's your next one due?

collie at crap mws. I would complain; it's insensitive and incompetent. And yes, try to get scan date changed.

Had a not entirely productive telephone call with the hospital ante natal clinic today too. Got a letter with an appt for 17 May, saying "scan" at the top but later saying if it's a cons appt to take a urine sample, so I rang to see which it was. Girl on phone said I'm not down for a consultant appt, I don't meet the criteria. She asked why would my mw think I needed to be under a consultant? I said because of post partum haemorrhage after dd and late miscarriage with dc3. She checked and said again I don't meet the criteria and I said I had actually seen a consultant at a private scan who was surprised I hadn't already seen someone. She checked again but said no to which I said "fine, the consultant I spoke to said he would scan me at 16 weeks if I rang his secretary so I suppose I'll have to do that then". Cue much grumbling about how I don't meet their criteria and they have too many women to see after which she finally promised to show my notes to that particular consultant tomorrow to see if he wanted to see me. Have a horrible feeling that we're going to end up doing that scan privately but I guess it'll be worth it. Sometimes nhs does piss me off

Anyway in a fit of pique I told her to cancel the scan appt for the 17th as I was having an NT scan the day before. Can't take more time off work without a good reason and so much easier to just pay. Btw my nhs scan pics would be £4 each - outrageous!

Sorry that turned into a rant - I am stomping around in a temper here

Oh and blackkat - get yourself on the list!!!

yay for katherines good scan

Izzy and Pink what is it with these mws/sonographers/consultants?? Sorry you are having a stressful time with things and I hope it all gets sorted for you soon.

doo thats really annoying for you too!

Lara definately stay away from the mc boards - I made that mistake too at around 7 weeks if I remember and it just made me feel shite for ages.

blackkat get yourself on the list now!

mummya hope you are ok, take some of your own advice - you know what you would say to someone else in your position :)

good luck scanners today/tomorrow.

helloooo everyone else I hope you are all well

I'm getting a bit concerned coz my bump is frickin huge already! DH keeps laughing at it and everyone says (yes all those do-gooders who had their kids 10+ yrs ago) I shouldnt be so big but what am I supposed to do?? I've only put on 2lbs and the bump is hard and I'm not fat anywhere else.

I've also got what I think is PGP - anyone else had this?

Also, 2nd/3rd/+ timers i need some advice - I'm just about out of my new bras and I dont really want to keep on buying 1 cup size bigger every few weeks. When do they stop growing? Is it worth getting another couple of cheapies for the next month or so? Ta very muchly for any advice

Hi everyone

I saw a heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A strong one too the lady said. We both cried-me and dp not the nurse!- even though I said I wouldn't because I'd still be worrying forever. Measured 7+5 which is a couple of days further on than I thought- is that good? Next scan not till 18 weeks which sounds like bloody ages away. May pay for one inbetween if I can't get an earlier one on NHS- I can't imagine 11 weeks of worrying there's no heartbeat anymore.

Thanks for all the good wishes everyone xxx- you're all so lovely

izzy sounds a nightmare with the clinic. Hope you get it sorted.

katherine fab scan news

doo sounds a nightmare for you too- you'd think they could have told you before

mummya hope you're feeling a bit better

velvet bras are worrying me now- well not bras but growing boobs! I'm pretty big in that area anyway and am freaked at the thought of getting even a couple of sizes bigger. My bump will never be bigger than my boobs!

lara i need to follow the advice to stay off the mc board too. Freaked myself out yesterday thinking that even a heartbeat today might not be enough.

Hi Pink - sorry to hear scan wasn't conclusive. I've got an hour slot booked because of there being 2 so I figured it was 30 mins for a single which seemed reasonable. Maybe it depends where you are in the country. Projectile vomiting and fainting are 2 ways to get you out of antenatal faster - both should be nurtured and used at appropriate intervals. The fainting tends to get you a cup of tea too.

I wore my badge on the tube this morning and everyone ignored it so I sat on the floor of the carriage until a nice man in shades gave me a seat. I'm not sure how much longer I can do that though as getting up isn't easy.

Still having major stresses about everything being ok as have been going through major personal stress recently which has horrendous effects on my blood sugars. I feel that everyone keeps on loading it on me as if somehow I'll be able to take it but I can't. If I lose them or find they're severely damaged as a result I don't think I'll be able to pick myself up and move on. The twins are moving nicely though to reassure me so hopefully this is just normal wibbling.

Welcome to all from the common room who've recently joined.

I'm all in favour for changing jobs if unhappy. I kept on putting it off thinking I might get pregnant and then gave up on that and actively hunted. Found an amazing new job and 3 months into it finally got pregnant (with twins). So obviously I'm a fan of that route. I did start my last job pregnant and it wasn't ideal but for the most part once I returned it suited me and gave me great experience.

hooray for the happy scan news today!! nice one Katherine and minnie

Izzy FFS how many times are they going to do this to you!! It sounds to me like the medical professionals (midwife and consultant) want you to have this appointment, but the receptionists are putting up the roadblocks. I can totally understand your stomping temper - I am really and its not even happening to me!! Soooo can you ask what their "criteria" is? and then take this back to the midwife - or try and contact the consultant directly to confirm that he doesnt need to see you? Hope you can find a way through, you shouldnt have to fight for it, but I know that you will if you feel its worth it and its what you need xxx

My spotting has stopped so am feeling fine. I think I will just chalk it up to experience and go with the next scan next month as planned.

Oops sorry Lara baby brain I have also had wee problems , although mine existed before. The first trimester was fairly disastrous with some major accidents but its now got a lot better. I've also got dispensation to use one of those pelvic floor toners to try and improve things.

Well done to Minnie and Katherine on fab scan news

Poor Pink on the NHS crapness, but Go Girl on the projectile vomit - major respect! I can't believe how crap the hospital are, although good news you've managed to get another scan next week.

Battery glad you managed to get bloods and have a scan booked - hopefully everything is doubling up nicely.

Dooscooby how frustrating for you! Have you told your employers yet (you don't need to)? I had a number of EPAU appointments in the early weeks - 4 over a fortnight/3 weeks and told work straight away as it meant that I didn't have unexplained absences and that I didn't have to take further appointments as leave. Might be worth a thought if you have a good relationship with your employers.

Collie I'm sorry your work situation is so crap. I'm also in the public sector and wondering what will happen to my job. I have to write my proposal for maternity leave cover this week - here's hoping that I can write it so I have some very part time hours to go back to.

And yes, scan photos at my hospital cost £2.50 each and are pants - line baby up, wait for it to move so the picture turns into a blobby mess, press print....

Izzy am stomping around after you in sympathy - what a mess! Grrrr.

Velvet I'm onto my 4th set of bras - am only just 21 weeks. Luckily I'm flat chested petite (have only just made it up to a small 36D) so I'm just buying Asda/Matalan soft cheapies - 2 for £5, that sort of thing. On the plus side, OH has just discovered that I now have a cleavage

Banana Good luck today!

Tigger Grrr to everyone on that train but well done for plonking yourself down on the floor. Can't believe how rude some people are...

Back to work for the first time in about 7 weeks today - eek! Am anxious but know I need to get on with it.

Morning!
Great to see Minnie also had a good scan yesterday.

izzy sorry to hear that you had a frustrating nhs at it's worst moment too. I'm way more annoyed today than I was yesterday-I have to go back to work today and have no idea what im going to say about needing more time off for another hosp visit on Friday. The thing that really irritated me yest was that I could hear them all discussing my case and trying to work out what the hell to do with me, it was horrid. They basically said I could try to get scanned at the epu and then the consultant would explain the results on Friday?! So, that's another 2 visits this week, plus a wait to have things 'explained' to me?

Anyway, it all seems to have culminated in me feeling very paranoid that something is wrong again. I haven't even told the doctors I'm pregnant this time and haven't had a blood test or anything and feel completely left in limbo. Doesn't help that I had a really stressful weekend, managing to crash the new car and have a massive argument with the owners of the cottage that we were renting for my friends hen, who completely messed us around. I'm convinced the stress will have ruined things for us again.

Sorry for the me, me rant!

Can I just do a quick me, me, me and pop back later when my head is in a better place?!

So I'm 6 weeks today and all my symptoms seem to be subsiding. I really thought I was doing well with lots of symptoms and now they're all going. Boobs not so sore, ms not so bad, not so knackered, freaky dreams going...... I'm convinced it's all gone or going wrong again and I feel useless. Going to try epu and/or mw in a bit. How am I going to cope with 3 mc's so close together?

Ok I'm back! Have spoken to epu and have a scan at 10 tomorrow. Petrified...... Have spoken to mw and she seems reasonably positive. She said you can get used to the hormone levels and hence the disappearance of symptoms, and obviously not bleeding is a good symptom. But as I had a mmc in Jan that one doesn't hold with me any more.

Minnie so glad your scan went well!

dooscooby that's an awful way for them to treat you.

Izzy that's awful.....what is wrong with these people?!

Collie so sorry you're stressed out too, I'm seriously thinking of taking some time off sick if everything is ok tomorrow. Too stressful!

Tigger you obviously need a bigger badge with flashing lights!

Harassed - breathe slowly and stop panicking... I have had hardly any symptoms and many of the ladies on here haven't had any.... We are all going through the same panics and the reality is for most of us, we will have healthy pregnancies.. (just wish I could believe it myself).

minnie so pleased your scan went well.

hihp symptoms come and go, fx for tomorrow, please try not to worry too much.

Minnie yay on the great scan that's super news. Why do you have to wait till 18wks? No 12 wk scan?

izzy I too am v for you. I hope you get it sorted and agree you should push hard to get what you want, you shouldn't have to go private for the standard of care you need.

blackkat thanks for the mat rights advice. To be fair I don't really know where I stand so it's helpful to hear that and once I've annouced my pg at work I plan to neet with our HR director to discuss my options. One thing that reassurces me is that noone will want to get rid of the pg lady- way to risky, but it gets complicated bcs by April 2013 my organisation will be abolished so anyone left that hasn't been slotted into new organisations will be made redundant, and I'll be off until about jan '13. But it's really too long off and so uncertain at the mo that I've given up worrying about it.

daisy life in the public sector is a tough call at the mo isn't it- apparently we're the devil... Or so it sometimes feels!
How was your first day back?

harassed after all you've been through it's completely understandable that your worried, but your symptoms fading is not necc all doom. Glad you've got a scan tomorrow - how far are you? X

Ok, I'm sat at home petrified!!!! Scan not till 4.20!!! I should be working from home but dh took the my laptop charger to work and the battery is dead so I'm sat with nothing to do but stress, waiting for him to come back!!! So scared. I've been getting cramps today- first time in weeks!! Talk about shit timing! It's so scary thinking about the scan, knowing that today my world could come tumbling down all over again!!

Good luck with the scan today collie. I hate the late ones, yesterday I was the same and after doing all the ironing (I figured better to do something I hate whilst stressing, rather than just stressing!), I put on the tv and found I fell asleep! Think the stressing and the full on weekend had just worn me out.
Anyway, fingers crossed for you x

collie hon you really are as bad as me. i'm sure you'll be fine, i know what you mean about the cramps though. am keeping fx for you.

took ds to see his ent consultant this morning, and it turns out he has had some hearing loss due to the constant glue ear he's had for at leats a year and half. So looks like he may have to have the grommet op, the consultant even mentioned possibly giving him hearing aids temporarily, but he didn't go into that. Waiting now for a letter from the surgery team. Wonderful, something else to worry about.

I know why it's called the freak out room.

I am 5 weeks tomorrow, my boobs were sore, but seem less so today and yesterday, but maybe I'm just getting used to it. I am irritable though. I am struggling to keep my temper, which is not like me. I hate everything and i'm fucking terrified. So far, though, for no reason. I did another 2 cheapys, one Sunday and one Monday, and Monday's was very definately darker that Sundays, which was in turn MUCH darker than the first one I did. I know you are all going to tell me the symptoms will come and go, but just tell me HOW you keep being nice and calm. That's all. Sorry for mememe.

cep my friend's daughter has had the grommet op, it was totally fine, it's very low risk, and the results were miraculous.

collie good luck for today, and hihp good luck for tomorrow.

yrmotb I'm supposedly 7 weeks today but haven't managed to keep calm at all - in fact I asked everyone the same thing a couple of weeks ago and they all said that they didn't really, the days just eventually ticked by and that people on here were here to listen and support in the meantime. I wish we all had a fast forward button!

I'm also v irritable, and v. emotional - cried my eyes out yesterday when watching 'This Morning' and a story about a woman who had recently died of breast cancer but had managed to live long enough to see her son's first day at school (turns out she also had 4 m/c before having her son - life just isn't fair is it!).