Freak out room for those newly updiffed after MC to hold hands and support each other... Part IV

[MummyAbroad]

Newly pregnant after miscarriage? Here is a nice place to hang out and swap symptoms and worries until you are brave enough to sign up to the grads thread.

Here is a link to the old thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1165866-Freak-out-room-for-those-newly-updiffed-after-MC-to-hold-hands-and-support-each-other-Part-III/AllOnOnePage#24507574

Silver - are yours ID? Mine are DCDA.

dachs that's rubbish, my bean just forced me to eat a galaxy ripple, obviously they need chocolate and the like!

Don't let your boss pressure you re the mat leave, just do what you feel is right for you and the pups. They won't appreciate you any more for working extra and chances are you really won't want to. I was well ready to stop at 36 weeks both times, and I had no complications and was only carrying one.

Lara your dr is definitely too old school and talking nonsense.

owl glad owlet cooperated with the Doppler

mumtum sorry you're having all this uncertainty, I would test again tomorrow morning with the cb digi...fwiw I found them to be quite sensitive and much better than doing all the "is it a line?" worrying.

mummya sorry you're still pukey...I would cancel work if you can, too much stress!

pink and tigger sometimes there is no answer re the childcare ime. Having used both nurseries and cms, I do think cms can be a bit more flexible. Also great if you have family or a backup nearby but it's just not always possible. We have no family nearby and for the first three months I was back at work after having dd I had to be home with her sick for 50% of the time I should have been at work!! (dd was a poorly baby!). My mum did cover some of it but it's a 200mile trip down for her, so we were mainly on our own. I worked from home when I could, dh worked from home sometimes, we took holidays, sick leave etc. It was really hard but we muddled through.

Apart from that episode (which at the time seemed to last forever!) it's generally only the rare odd day or two, which is relatively easy for me to do by working from home, or working my three days a week on different days. It works, somehow.

Ohh Bloody Hell mumtum I am so sorry. But stop panicking. I don?t think you should save your pee ? although I did one morning and it was ok, but as the others have said, its probably the tests. I had 2 sets of tests a set of cheapies off ebay which were supposedly v sensitive and a set of First Response that were less sensitive In the end all I got for ages of the cheapies was faint shadows, abut I got clearer lines on the FR, despite being less sensitive ? and don?t forget I was a good 11/12 dpo. And your ?ive digi could be because its not fmu, it does make a difference and you are so very early testing. I hope so very much that its not a CP darling. You need to talk to your OH, don?t try to shield him as you need to lean on him if your worried. He wouldn?t want you worrying on your own. Go out and buy a decent brand and test again tomorrow with FMU ? and let us know how its goes. FX sweetie. (((hugs)))

Thanks collie I agree that i would need him for support and though he doesnt always approve of my MN fixation he is good about all the other stuff... so i just text him as he had text asking how ihs new mummy was, ( typing this in tears as we speak ) Told him id not felt sick this morning and that seemed odd so i did another test and it said not pregnant. ( he already says i must have a fetish for POAS as i seem to do it so often so he wouldnt have been surprised at my doing this....) He just text back saying he really sorry and that he is gutted and asked is it a definite. Text back and said til 2m morning when i can poas again i dont know... get the feeling its gonna be a tough night ..... [worried]

Right off out to get fr and cb and whatever else asdas stocks so i can pee in a HUGE pot first thing tomorrow and use every test i can afford ( whilst making mental note to buy '2 packs' of each of these so i have them to test sunday or monday when i still dont beleive them )

Hi mumtum sorry you're having so much stress. I'd second what the others say about getting a CB digi and test with your morning wee tomorrow. I'd maybe tell OH too as I'd also get stressed out with mummy texts. Really hope it's good news tomorrow

dacha FWIW I'm planning on packing up pretty early I think-fancy spending some chill time with the bump before it arrives, and don't want to be stressed and knackered before the baby arrives. If you let your boss know early she can plan for it, so she'll just have to get over it. Also, my bean demands junk food constantly, it is ridiculous

Thanks tigger and izzy for childcare info, lots to think about am hoping my local friends will get diffed v soon so we can share care!!

tunnocks an ivf clinic has been monitoing my pregnancy and they gave me weekly scans from 6 weeks to 10 weeks as a matter of course. I can't believe they'd do that if there was any risk involved.

Lara what planet does your GP live on? he does realise they don't put the entire probe into you right????? Hardly any of it goes in. What a complete knob.

nix I told my consultant about palpitations and breathlessness and he was concerned so referred me to cardiologist who's wired me up to see what's going on for 48 hours. Cardiologist reckons he sees lots of diffed women and most of them have nothing wrong but it's worth checking just in case, especially since bupa's paying :)

owly I reckon your bean and my bean should meet up when they are born, they will probably be soul mates. That's the sort of random thing mine would do just because it thinks it's funny.

mummya sorry you're still having a hard time, really hope a puke free chilled pregnancy is just around the corner for you.

wiw you about nice lady? Hope you're ok in sunny Dubai!!

Owls good stuff... i know exactly what you mean... quiet day here too! I spent the entire night last night thinking i was starting prem labour due to horrendous shooting cramps... turns out it was just my tummy... and full of very painful trapped wind bloody chinese takeaway! So of course today.. just want to feel those kicks... and maybe the odd one or two... gah never when you want them!!!

Pink re the childcare thing... its tough. I was forever off work with sickly specimen DS as when he was teething he was forever nursing a 40 degree-er and there were just some days when he couldnt be left. If he couldnt go to nursery then he would have to go to his g/mas instead but 9/10's i would work from home in order to look after him. They have to allow you a certain amount of time off to look after sick kids it should be in your contract/terms of employment... split that between you and DH and you should be sorted x

Crossed posts mumtum sounds like a good plan, fingers crossed for good news

Right just cancelled work, and asked DH to take a day off to take care of DS. I am now lying in bed trying to keep still and not move until the vom tablet takes affect (third one this morning, first two puked right up)

mumtum good luck testing tomorrrow.

Dach even with mega sickness, chocolate is still on the menu, prooving its usefulness IMO.

tunnocks forgot to say it before, but was very pleased to hear about your scan. Glad you have not taken to heart anything the moody sonographer said, much better to ignore unhelpful "advice" like that!

mumtum sorry you're getting messed around, like the others said you need to test in the morning. keeping everything crossed for you sweetie.

owl glad owlet is ok.

collie sorry you're still getting the pains, just try to relax and fx for monday.

nix my emp doesn't provide time off to look after my ds when ill, if i need to take time off i have to take it annual leave.

Sorry i've missed out so many other posts am really tired, ds woke at 2:20 this morning. Also feeling very worried about tuesday, i've not had any more bleeding but can't shake a bad feeling i have.

I've never got time off for sick child just sick me. Other method used is dh goes into work early and brings work home to do at home. I go in late and stay late. Worked well with last employer as most people kept late hours and never remembered when you came in e.g. 12-1.

OMG - so much happens here in two hours... just logged on and had the MN equivalent of 1001 Nights to read!

Had a panicked hour of lots of twinges, low back pain and light low tummy pain. Of course I am aware it is probs twinges but had to go to loo five times to check for blood and re-googled the symptoms of MC and ectopic pg. I hope it was just stretching ligaments. Collie - are you getting the same pains? I am most uncomfortable I find on my work chair...

Cep - don't worry - it's no good for bean

I confided in a colleague this AM why I will not be busting a gut next week. He was very supportive. I am going to make sure I am in my room for 8pm latest every evening with a bubble bath and room service. In fact, as I will be without DH I will use it as an excuse to watch all the crappy TV I want and I am deliberately not taking my laptop so I won't be tempted to do extra work in the evenings.

Am I being neurotic by taking a huge pack of pads in case I MC while away??

Yeah sorry I meant parental leave, ie for sick child, not sick leave for me. You're entitled to a certain amount off (unpaid though iirc) if you've used up your holiday.

Now if only I could persuade my mum to move round the corner I wouldn't have to juggle it all again...

Parental leave must be applied for in advance (I think at least 3 weeks) so not much use for spontaneous sick leave - but it's good for operations etc.

Lara I carry pads everywhere I go.... :(

Hi everyone, thanks for all the welcomes.
I've got funny pains too at the moment - lots of stretching and rumbling, it sounds (and I guess looks) like a cow chewing grass...mmm nice.

mumtum agree with what's been said, use FMU tomorrow, and FX for you. I'm thinking of you. ((hugs))

Sorry such a quick post have to get back to work and try not to look like all I want to do is get under the damn desk and sleep. [desperately needs a nap emoticon]

Lara I also carry a pad with me at all times! I think it's not neurotic, it's an emotional safety net to know I'm prepared, practically speaking, for all eventualities. Sounds like you've got a good plan for the trip. I'm sure it will be fine.

Dachs You cons is wrong about chocolate. My RL diffed friend was telling me only yesterday that her pregnancy book (I think it's called 'what to expect when you're expecting') actually says in its chapter on heathy eating that a chcolate bar a day makes for a happy baby! If it's in a book it must be right...

Will update more later... have work deadline to meet...

Mumtum Hi - sorry you are stressing so much at the moment. I know what you're going through! Can't believe how many tests I went through - it really does become like an addiction.

For what its worth - First Response always gave the earliest positive for me. In my experience of using CB digi - they just weren't as sensitive for me. I only got a "pregnant" on the CB digi at least 2 days after I got a positive with first response and this was 11/12 dpo. The line was also very very faint on the FR but it was there. Also - it HAD to be first pee of the day with CB.

Wishing you lots of luck!

Wombat - that's it... a creme egg a day for us all for the next 8 months...

Now someone mentioned a Ripple, I desperately fancy one :-)

In fact, I just want FOOD - I am hungry all the time.. I could eat meat and eggs every day...!

Hmmm...I wonder what I'm thinking of then tigger ...I know, is it time off for dependants or something? Anyway there is some provision for taking emergency time off for illness of dependants, but I think it's unpaid, so I've always tried to manage by swapping my days, working from home and using holidays...

Lara it was me with the Ripple and it was lush...

It is the same thing Izzy - you can take up to 4 weeks consecutively in child's birthday calendar year to a maximum of 13 weeks (I think) until they're 5 or 16 if they're disabled. It's unpaid and has to be approved in advance and the business can refuse for a business reason. Maybe your employer is just nice about it? Mine wasn't but I did get it in the end for ds starting school, I came back at the end of it and resigned as had got a new job. www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Moneyandworkentitlements/WorkAndFamilies/Parentalleaveandflexibleworking/DG_10029416

My RL friend has used that uppaid leave for her first ds at the end of her MAT leave with Annual leave so she was able to go back part time (2days then 3 days( for a while, without having to permenatley reduce her hours......

Hello again lovelies, its friday!!!!

Lara your GP is grrr, what an idiot! Glad I'm not his wife!!!!

Silver grand news on the scan - wey hey!

Owl am with you on the chocolate but am only craving savory - in fact, time for a block of cheese, me thinks, because bean needs it, obviously

mumtum welcome, and I'm so sorry you're going through this uncertainty. Definitely try again tomorrow with FMU, and you are testing early, aren't you? It may come good yet - will be thinking of you! We're all on hand to help you line up the sticks.

Collie it is a trained dog that we're after but a good one costs a ridiculous amount - over £5000! We picked up one this afternoon but its going back tomorrow as its too young, disobedient and bouncy!!!

I may have excelled myself with the googling though - I've found an 8yr old collie with a working then domestic background. The centre owner's taking him onto the fell tomorrow to see if he remember how to work sheep. If so, he's ours for £50 .

hello to everyone else!!! Will bake tomorrow, promise!

Hi all,

Collie I have been having period pains on and off for the last week or so. Today they have been bad again, but not bad enough to warrant me needing to take anything. I think it's all part and parcel.

OwlPhew for hearing a hb! I own a doppler, so I know I am in dangerous territory if I get that far...

mumtum Welcome and sorry for the uncertainty. I wouldn't take the BFN for fact until you have had a BFN on the CBD. Hopefully that won't happen :)

Lara Good luck with the work thing next week. Hope you don't get pushed too much. Take care!

MummyA Hope you feel better soon. I hate that the nausea meds do nothing for actual nausea and rather just prevent you from bringing anything up :(

I am feeling decidedly nauseated today. Eating is the one and only fix but I know that in about 2 weeks that won't be helping and I won't be able to move (if I get that far). I have to be a witness at a tribunal Monday and I am just praying I get through it without having to seek permission to have a bathroom break--they frown on that a lot. Very tired and cannot wait to get DD in bed so I can go to sleep.

Freak out question: Does being thirsty mean impending miscarriage? I think I read ages ago that it is and I am SOOOO thirsty. :(