No Science. Just Shagging. Them's the rules! Thread for the Viroids.

[NervousNelly]

The (updated)(again)(again) 'rules' from our Just Shagging Originator for the Viroids:

Maintain a relaxed attitude at all times - drink if you want too, especially on your birthday (or when you've had bad news). Thread precedent dictates if you drink to excess you will get a BFP (but not recommended). (But it does work).

Covet thy husband and enjoy every minute. Shag at every opportunity - shag-capes and awesome superpowers optional.

Keep acronym-age to a minimum! EWCM is now to be referred to as 'pant snot'. Try not to get sucked in by Fertility Friend (at least for a while), but knowing where you are in your cycle and furkling for pant snot is most definitely allowed.
OV is ovulation - I'm allowed to forget what date I've OVd, feel free to join me on that one!

Bunting is to be put out for any small victory, thread-parties are held regularly and hugs are always welcome!

Once you have your BFP, feel free to hang around and share your wisdom and virtual cocktails with the JSers.

Keep us up to date with gossip!

*

Most of these rules are well and truly broken!! But we try to chill - honest

Part 1 Graduates:
Tanmu82 - BFP
PrivetDancer - BFP
OnlyWantsOne - BFP
Frankenfanny ? BFP
Notso - BFP
knittakid - BFP
loopeylu - BFP
PinkFondantFancy - BFP
Grannyapple ? BFP
Fuzzywood - BFP
canoe - BFP
janedoe - BFP
StarflowerGirl - BFP

Part 2 Graduates:
ihaveaplan - BFP
lovemylulu - BFP
shitforbrains - BFP
gormers - BFP

Part 3 Graduates
Bonkerz - BFP
Kitten - BFP
Cowboylover - BFP
takingtheplunge ? BFP

Part 4 Graduates:
NoMoreChocBiscuits - BFP
Milanomum - BFP
Cremegg - BFP
BrassicaBabe - BFP
Dynababy - BFP

Part 5 Graduates:
TakeThatLady - BFP
Vallinna - BFP
SingingMog - BFP
aDarkStarWithStrangeWays - BFP
Eskarina - BFP

Part 6 Graduate
Reality

So we really need a super fertile thread this time Viroids! Come on, Shag Capes at the ready :)

Josie - i'm sure what she meant was that you haven't worded it in such a way that you look like you really want it.
it's really hard for some people to sell themselves.

Look at the answers you've given and see if you can big them up a little bit :)

hear hear, I always had problems with application forms, have now filled in so many blowing my own trumpet comes as second nature

Have a think about what you are really good at, and go for it!

Josie I'm in exactly the same position as you really. I've applied for so many jobs that I know I have the skills and ability for, but I'm getting nowhere. It's so hard to tell people how great you are, especially if you're naturally shy. I think the main things are to be very direct (start sentences with "I did this...." etc) and try to be very specific with examples etc. And when you get an interview, just smile a lot and have a couple of questions for them up your sleeve, so you look interested in the post.

Posh cat is now stretched out on "her" armchair!

Thanks everyone. I've spoken to my enthusiastic friend who's in the job I want so she knows what's expected and she's going to look at my new version for me. The manager did give me some good advice but that first sentence has really dented my confidence. I'm trying not to get hung up on it though. Usually when people say I can't do something I go out and do it anyway so I'm going to try and adopt that attitude. My friends have faith in me so that's spurring me on

I'm sorry to hear you had a knock to your confidence Josie. I'm sure you would/will be brilliant at the job, but I do think the hard part in all of those processes is getting the job in the first place. I hate applying for jobs because I'm so scared of the rejection and how that will make me feel about myself... Try not to let it upset you too much though, because that will only make you feel worse and worse about yourself - you need to be getting ready to "big yourself up" at the interview!

Maybe your manager is just scared of losing you!

Also, in my old job, my team leader was so horrible to us all sometimes. It made me so angry because everyone knew she was extremely lucky to have the job and she wasn't very good at it (and at the risk of being a bit nasty, she really wasn't very bright in the slightest). Some people just let "power" get to their head - and if they have a "leader" or "manager" title attached to their job, they think that actually makes them superior to others on every level which is rarely the case.

nice new name Katee!

I've just had a thought. I thought I'd ask here first, in case anybody knows about it...

Obviously I want to go to university in September to skip the huge rise in future debt potential. But, I also want a baby. I know the particular university I have my place at operates a "gap year" policy for people who require more than 2 weeks off for any reason, which I would as I'd like a little time at home with the baby and have to consider my last pregnancy knocked me off my feet for at least 6 months.

Say I started university in September '11 and then got pregnant. I could stay at university for the first 6 months, for example, and then take a gap year, returning in March '13. As I had already started my studies before the price change, would I return to the same fees or would I have to go to the higher fees?

Just wondering, as this would help make my decision a lot easier

Thank you to everyone for welcoming me to the group. Its really nice to see all the advice and also read about how those who have only just had a BFP are feeling!

I have had an awful day at work. 4 of my year 12 students have gone to the head of sixth form to complain that my lessons don't "seem" planned and then grossly exaggerated a situation where I was 5 mins late for a lesson cos had to eat or was gonna faint to me being 20 mins late and turning up to it and saying that I didn't realise we had a lesson! Head of sixth form was nice enough to email it to the head teacher who then passed it on to my head of department. To be fair the head of department was really nice and just said not to worry but feel really really shit about it! Its also naff that now there is this paper trail and the head teacher has been involved when he didn't need to be!

Ok - rant over! Sorry about that just had to get it off my chest as has knocked my confidence. Roll on the honeymoon!

Happy birthday Bam make sure you have a or 2 on me! Good luck in your interview - maybe have the after its over!

babylann hello! I work in a university, and I would imagine that if you started the course under the current fees system, that's what you'd return to after maternity leave. But you would certainly have to check it out with your institution: the insitution I work at operates a similar system, but students have to have been in attendance for a certain amount of time first (like maternity leave) to qualify - I think it's about a year. But every institution is different, and certainly some institutions will deal with the fees change very differently. Sorry, that's not very helpful! But I would guess that it's more likely that you will keep paying the lower fees (but you may have to pretend that getting pg was an accident).

Thanks for the advice MollyDefoe. That's definitely useful... It seems a bit risky, and I obviously couldn't get away with pretending it was an accident if I had enquired about it beforehand, so unless they have the information available on the website, it might be a bit of trouble to try and pull off. I mean, I could try and schedule it so that I got pregnant at such a point that it would mean having the baby during the holidays or whathaveyou, but with my health issues at the moment, I don't think I can really plan to be so specific with my due date! [sigh emoticon]

It would be much easier if the university wasn't a commute away, as then I could probably manage to go to university while pregnant - and even while recovering from the likely CS I'd have to have. We are renting our house so could technically move quite easily, but then DP would have to commute and as his days would be much longer and much more rigid, that wouldn't be fair to ask him to do. Plus, I'm hoping I can use my mum for some free childcare sometimes, which wouldn't be as easy if we moved to a different city either.

[mumbles] I thought I had come up with a win-win idea! [goes back to the drawing board]

Babylan you def need to look into it. I do alot of UCAS stuff at work and I know we have had to advise our students that even if they apply this year but defer their place till sept 2012 they will have to pay the new fees. I don't know how that would work if you had already started the course but wouldn't be suprised if they only honoured it for the 1st year of study or something stupid. Is there anyway of finding out on the website? There might be a terms and conditions section for the extended leave?

I think you'd be absolutely within your rights to phone up the relevant department, and ask these questions, but to refuse to give your name. You can say that you're planning on coming to the university this academic year, but if they don't know your name, and there's no "paper trail" of the conversation, there'll be absolutely nothing they can do if you do get pg. Or you could even get a friend to phone up and ask these questions. There should also be an "impartial" student advice service, which should be happy to operate anonymously, and would hopefully be able to give you all the answers.

I will check, because things will have changed since the last time I read it (Sept '09 when I got pregnant with DD and was planning on going to uni anyway). However, the terms weren't overly specific at the time, as I'm sure they want to maintain the right to review it on a case by case basis so as to avoid pre-planned abuse of the rules, which I guess is what I would be doing.

All it said was that you could take 2 weeks off, but if you needed more you would have to take a year away from your studies and return at the exact same point in the course as you were at when you originally left. It was a big document though the first time around, and I don't know if I can bring myself to scroll through it at the moment after the long day I've had...

Ah yeah MollyDefoe, that seems like a good idea. I hadn't thought about making an anonymous call. I mean, I could still try and schedule it to be conveniently located in the summer holidays, and hope that my SPD doesn't return and I have a fast recovery from CS, I just don't think it's very likely and can't risk making the wrong decision and ruining either my chances of having another baby or my opportunity to get a degree at a university I have always dreamed of studying at.

Evening Viroids!
Babylann good luck with your cunning uni plan, I hope you manage to find a way to have both. Thinking of you x
Becs Hi! Welcome to the thread - I'm a newbie too, and rubbish at posting regularly but am enjoying the support I've had here. Sounds like you had a rubbish day, seem like a complete over reaction on the part of those students. Please dont let it knock your confidence, I'm sure these things happen all the time and I doubt the head has given it any more thought. Oh, and good luck TTC! x
Josie good luck with the job! The above advice is much clearer and more sensible than anything I could come up with. But I am thinking of you and looking forward to you posting some good news.

Me - well, Salsa then more SWI tonight, shouldn't be doing it every night really as apparently every 2nd day is more effective, but I am still in the TTC 'honeymoon period' where shagging to make babies seems all romantic Hope you're getting loads of SWI in to Bam my ovulation buddy! x

Hope that booze doesn't affect conception/implantation too much as I have been drinking far too much recently (while I still can IYSWIM)

Babylann - For what it's worth, I don't think you should look at it as "abusing the rules". It seems to me that you're an adult; you're not being paid to go to university (so they can't make the same demands of you as a job); and it's not even vaguely unreasonable to want to have a degree and another child. Your university should simply want to help you to make the most out of your degree - and that would have to mean giving you reasonable maternity entitlement, because you clearly wouldn't be able to give your all to the degree course if you were having to write essays 2 weeks after giving birth. I have contact with students quite regularly who have to take a year out of their studies for a whole range of reasons - and I've never seen any of my colleagues treat them as if they're trying to pull a fast one. I think that, if you want both another baby and a degree, then you should just go for it! My feeling is that, especially if it's a good university, then they'll try and make it work for you - and that should include letting you pay the fees that you initially signed up to pay. I hope this doesn't sound too preachy! Really good luck!

Morning everybody! How are we all today?

Hi penguin! Amazingly, I got some SWI in last night. I was convinced that DP would be too exhausted, but he was well up for it!! I hope your evening went according to plan.

Becs those 6th form kids sound like precocious little sods to me, and I'm sure that your HT and Head of Dept won't be thinking too much about it. I would be bloody furious too though, if it was me. Have a

Babylann I have no advice I'm afraid but fingers crossed you get sorted

Well, I am feeling better today, screw my team manager Just waiting to hear back from my friend who's looking over my application. I'm definitely going to put it in, and if I don't get an interview at least I was brave enough to try. And if I DO get an interview I'll poop myself, then prepare like a maniac!

That's great Josie. I'm sure your friend will be honest with you about anything that needs changing, and you will have a great chance of getting the job. It would be great for you to get away from where you are just now, after all the upset you had. You seem so much stronger about everything now than when we first met.

Thank you, Molly, you keep on saying things that make me say, "Yeah! She's absolutely right! I'm just going to go for it!" Maybe you should be a motivational speaker. I hope you work at the university I'm going to I think I'm going to go to university in September, whatever happens. But I will make an anonymous phone call, or maybe email (I'm a bit of a phone-phobe), and see what happens.

I never had the 'honeymoon period' really penguin . The whole process of sex without protection makes me feel really squeamish. And Bam, glad you managed to get some SWI in!

So sorry you had such a terrible day Becs. That must have been really stressful. I'm glad it hasn't ended up coming to anything more serious, though. Hopefully you'll be able to keep your frustration towards those students tucked away so they don't have more "excuses" to complain!

Good luck Josie! Glad you feel a bit more cheerful about it today :) [high fives Josie and joins in saying "screw you" to the team manager]

Just got a text from DP saying "I just nearly plummeted to my death". Such a drama queen.

Is your DP James Bond babylann?

Go for it with starting your degree in September. Who knows what life will bring? Good luck with contacting the uni as well.

Thanks Bam!

He's not James Bond, luckily, I could never be a Bond girl - imagine me, emerging from the sea with my little white bikini on, covered in stretch marks and my muffin top belly and extra pair of boobs under my armpits. Probably with a bit of baby sick in my hair.

He's just a massive wuss!

babylann! You paint such a beautiful image!!

Thanks Bam and Babylann Bam I feel a lot stronger now thanks, what a lovely thing to say. My friend told me that because I'm a control freak and obviously can't really control ttcing, I should control things that I am able to, such as my job, and getting a new yard, so I did, and tbh I've hardly noticed this last week of 2ww, though I'm not holding out much hope. So, in my control freak-ness, I am applying for this job, and I am officially moving yards on sat, which should be great enws but now I'm scared Babylann hope your DP is ok, perhaps he's a secret spy