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Original poster

Having difficulties ttc#2?

799 replies

Lychees · 13/09/2010 15:00

After chatting on another thread, I've discovered that quite a few of us are having trouble ttc#2.

It's difficult to find much support in RL; people tell you that you should be happy as you already have a DC [I really am!] and unless they've been there, they don't really understand why it's so upsetting not to be able to get pregnant again so I've created this thread so we can share and we have a place that we can rant/vent/moan/support each other......

Sorry for the unimaginitive title ... marketing is not my area of expertise Smile!

FYI, I'm 36, DH is 38, we have DS who is just over two and a half and we have been ttc#2 for 13 months.

We have had bloods and SA on the NHS and an internal scan and AMH privately and so far, our status is unexplained sub-fertility. If I don't get my BFP this time, next month we'll be having another SA and HSG privately.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lychees · 22/10/2010 12:34

Louja, AF should have arrived on Monday. I'm on CD34 now.

Might still be my body playing tricks as I have gone to CD39 but I think I ov'd later that time.

OP posts:
Loujalou · 22/10/2010 12:58

See I am not an early tester but would have tested by now. I have tested 3 times this month but that's because the spotting has been bothering me.

Original poster
Lychees · 23/10/2010 09:06

AF arrived this morning [19DPO!] [hsad]

I can't beliveve she tricked me. On the plus-side, it's my wedding anniversary this weekend and we have booked dinner in a posh restaurant so I can now eat/drink whatever I want.

Hope you all have a good weekend.

OP posts:
8rubberduckies · 23/10/2010 10:57

Sorry to hear that lychees, but have a wonderful wine and soft cheese-filled anniversary! Smile

PictureThis · 23/10/2010 16:51

Well AF has just arrived on CD29 so starting all over again.

pointsmakeprizes · 23/10/2010 17:47

poor you lychees i really thought it was your month this time and the HSG had worked for you. At least you can enjoy oysters, champagne and rare steak! Happy anniversary.

sorry to hear about AF for you too picturethis.

I am CD3 today so we can be cycle buddies this month.

duffegg · 23/10/2010 21:38

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soupmaker · 24/10/2010 17:13

Hello everyone. Just to let you know I have had a MC at nine weeks. It's been devastating, but at least we were able to get pregnant, and I just need to keep a hold of that thought. Keeping my fingers crossed for us all.

reallygrumpy · 24/10/2010 18:06

Oh soupmaker I'm so sorry to hear that, I had a mmc (followed by ERPC) in the summer. Do give yourself plenty of time to recover, it's very tough physically and emotionally.

Loujalou · 25/10/2010 08:20

Big hugs soupmaker x

duffegg · 25/10/2010 10:50

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corblimeymadam · 25/10/2010 10:58

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duffegg · 25/10/2010 15:26

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lateatwork · 25/10/2010 16:34

soupmaker that truly sucks.

so, after being regular as clockwork basically since DD was born (minus time spent with 2 X MC)... now arent. weirdly, early last month then lots of spotting and now no sign of period at all (day 36 and counting..).... so, instead of remaining rational, I have decided i am starting menopause or have some serious ailment. and no, def no preggars as no ttc as was on hols without OH... but went for immaculate conception and tested anyway... doh.

so, waiting for period to start to can kick off IVF treatment....

does anyone else feel like their life is on hold?

pointsmakeprizes · 25/10/2010 18:51

soupie so sorry to hear your news, sending you a big hug.

duff try to keep the faith - cramps and sore boobs could be good syptoms too!

late how do you feel about the IVF? I have all but given up and waiting for my free IVF go - though won't happen til next May at the earliest. How long did you wait before deciding to go for IVF?

Original poster
Lychees · 25/10/2010 21:12

Soup, I'm so sorry about your mc. So heartbreaking. Look after yourself. Give yourself time to grieve. Sending you best wishes.

Late, I have put off holidays, cancelled my gym membership, not changed jobs even though I'm sooooooo bored, gone back to work an extra day a week [to bump up my matenity pay] ..... everything for this pregnancy that still hasn't happened yet.

Duff, it could still happen this month. It isn't over until the witch arrives.

In answer to your other Q, I'm feeling okay about AF's arrival this month despite the build up. Haven't had the usual few days of emotional meltdown and still feeling optimistic.

BelgianBun, it certainly helps to hear stories like yours. It gives me that little bit of hope to keep going and to never give up on the dream of expanding my family.

OP posts:
lateatwork · 26/10/2010 07:27

points we have been ttc since july 2009. have had 2 MC (also 1 before DD) and now nothing. I am old so cant afford to wait any longer. how do i feel about IVF?... not that great. wish could happen naturally due to emotional toll and cost (i am privately funded...) but hey ho

lychees yup. me too. everything seems to be on hold for something that hasnt happened (or has twice but ended up as a couple of nights in hospital... argh...) i too am in a job and too scared to move 'just in case', holidays- only 'safe' options 'just in case'... tbh i dont think i can cope for much longer... i want to drink coffee, and wine and be 'normal'... oh and i got a text from a well meaning friend at 0530 this am telling me about her impending 20 week scan tomorrow. gee thanks for that...

Orchid12 · 26/10/2010 08:40

Hi,
Sorry I've not been around for a while, am on other threads and I find it hard to catch up with everyone!

Louja brilliant news!!!!! Woohooo [hsmile]

Soup am sending big hugs to you - it's so unfair.

Points and Late we have our first appt with the FC next week. We are weeks off a year of TTC, and of course because of DC1, are not eligible for NHS funding. So, we're going private. My understanding of our situation is that we are technically ok, so will gain the unenviable label of 'unexplained secondary infertility'. From reading a bit on the web, I think the FC will recommend we go straight to IVF rather than trying clomid or IUI. I have been talking to friends etc and I would like to put myself forward for egg doning IVF, if I meet the criteria. It's all a bit daunting, but I'm focusing on the end goal rather than the means of getting there.

I too am tired of not booking things 'just in case'. I also feel that I don't enjoy life as much as I could be at the moment because of this constant pressure. I try really hard not to let TTC control me, but inevitably it does, what with not drinking alcohol, caffeine and so on.

Bah, sorry for the miserable post, am just

Original poster
Lychees · 27/10/2010 14:23

Hello All,

Orchid ... we're the same ... unexplained secondary sub-fertility. However, during our first consultation at the private FC our consultant suggested trying IUI with Clomid [slightly irregular periods]. I did not question why not IVF as we had still not had our tests at that point but if AF arrives this month then we'll be going to see him and we'll be putting that question to him.

I had a fab anniversay meal but now were contending with the pox in our house. So much for a few relaxing days off! Luckily, DS's case seems quite mild ... so far.

Late think you need some fish for some fish-slapping.

PMA is dipping here ... I feel like I'll never get my BFP [hsad].

How is everyone else doing?

OP posts:
littleshamrock · 27/10/2010 18:37

Hi everyone,

I've gone a little awol from this thread, to be honest have been doing my best to avoid thinking about anything to do with complete failure to get pregnant Sad.

Anyhow, I haven't come on to moan, but more to share a few events that have happened to me recently that are helping with realising that while failure to conceive number is unfair and very sad, I'm actually very lucky to have what I have.

I've been struggling with my work recently; work for the NHS and seemed to have a constant procession of patients who had abused either drink/drugs and were given tens of thousands of pounds of treatment while my DP is on a six month list to see urologist with no prospect of NHS funding for fertility treatment. Last week, I looked after a patient who had been through so much that I nearly cried reading her notes and genuinely felt so glad that I had one healthy child. This poor lady had lost five children between stillborn babies and childhood cancer and had been left with enormous surgical problems due to a botched section. I can't say anymore due to confidentiality, but I can't say how thankful I felt to be in my situation not hers.

This isn't a "aren't you lucky you've got one already" sentiment I'm expressing, and I certainly don't mean to belittle how anyone on else is feeling at the moment. I'm still desperately broody but wanted to share as this woman really made me appreciate what I have and I hope maybe this can help others.

Sorry for epic post!

pointsmakeprizes · 28/10/2010 16:45

shamrock that is really tragic for that poor woman. I think it's right what you say, we all have to stop and think at times how lucky we are because we can get so down and obsessed about No.2 and we forget what we have already.

orchid let us know how your appt goes next week and what they recommend.

late I feel the same about IVF being our option at the moment, especially as technically there is nothing wrong with us, there must be some other way. It just seems like I'm using a sledge hammer to crack a nut.

Been reading that Katie Price started IVF after 8 months of trying - part of me thinks how ridiculous for going to those extremes after only 8 months but another part of me understands how desperate it can get and if I had her finances maybe I would have done the same too. Though she has had two failed attempts so far though.

Luce2006 · 29/10/2010 18:43

soup so sorry to be reading this news Sad sending you lots of hugs!!!!

well, Hi girls! have disappeared for a while, was really pissed off with my body for behaving in such a stupid way. Anyway, I've had 2 acupunture session and I'll eb having 4 more over the next few weeks. This cycle I had EWCM and a positive OPK on day 18 instead of the ususal 21 Shock so I'm secretely hoping that acupunture is really working!!! we did BD ond ay 17 and 18 so hopefully it was enough ( were at grandparents house and sleeping int he same room as DS so we fely very uncomfortable in having sex,LOL!!! forgot my thermometer at home so couldn't chart for 6 days but took my temp this morning and it's gone up.hopefully it will stay up
need to get dinner sorted so we'll sit down and read all the posts later on

bye girls!!!

Luce2006 · 29/10/2010 18:46

oh, and please, forgive my awfu spelling!!!

Original poster
Lychees · 29/10/2010 19:15

Good luck, Luce.

Shamrock, I know what you mean. It's all too easy to focus on all the negatives when you're ttc and forget about all the good stuff in your life.

Hope you all have a good weekend [hsmile].

OP posts:
Luce2006 · 31/10/2010 14:38

HI girls!
Hada little HAlloween party yesterday with a few of DS' friends and their parents. It was great, the kids enjoied the little Treasure Hunt and the parents enjoied the food Grin
well, just been to the loo cause I was feeling a bit weird just to find out that I'm bleeding Sad light and brownish/pinkish colour but I've got the feeling that it will get heavier by the end of the day...I'm only at 5DPO..I was really hoping that thigns would get better Sad