More ongoing and continuing conceptions and follicling ahead of Feisty, Fabulous Forty somethings

[Beattiebow]

I've started a new thread!

Italian are you feeling better and how did your sponsered walk go, am hoping the rain kept at bay until you finished? You have such words of wisdom, enjoy reading your posts.
Galway tis a difficult decision you've made, not sure if I could do the same. Please don't totally disappear, will you...
diege so so sorry and to you also 40somemum we're here for you (ok I know I don't post that often, do tend to lurk but here for you in spirit so to speak)
Gum a happy belated birthday and congratulations to you tank and spotty, fantastic news and helps me to feel positive that it will happen at some point for the rest of us. Mmm might give Preseed a go now
Waves hello to hippy BB Louise Jolls muchlove alba lia and anyone else I may have not remembered.

I have a theory (yes it is ridiculous but I'm sticking with it) I'm a little hopeful to get a BFP within the next couple of months....why you ask...well I had my DS in August, my DD in September and the due date for the bean that I lost was September 11...so these are my lucky months. I'm crazy aren't I

Crazy but lovable with it. I hope you're right curls.

I'm feeling a bit weird about the date actually. This time last year I was just about to get my last period before the BFP and so on all my notes etc it said LMP 23/11/09. I'm sure this AF is gonna arrive on 23rd just to mess with my head - ho hum!

GG Thinking of you. Hard to let go I can imagine. Keep us informed my dear (I typed that as keep us infirmed the first time ).

jolls Whooo hooo - where are you hon???

Gum how is it going? You crafty old Ozzie, asking for a scan and pretending you don?t know dates. Good on ya girl (said in an ozzie accent) let us know how it all goes. We are not bored by your preggo comments, we are interested. I am especially interested in the grapefruit thing, what is that all about?

GG thinking of you sweetie, I hope you are not too stressed or confused about it all. Echo Curly please don?t disappear!
Spotty how are you too?

Diege thinking of you.

Curlylox thank you for your kind words, as I say, I think my family would just call me a bossy boots! But I do appreciate your nice thoughts. If you think this month is lucky for you then go for it!

Muchlove thank you for the lovely comment about me being an agony aunt. Don?t sell your soul, it is far too valuable. That?s me being an agony aunt by the way.

I went on my walk today and it was fine. I managed to do it in under 5 hours, which was good. The weather was fine, until the last half an hour. I only got a bit wet. Hubby was great making sure we did not get lost.
Sadly, though, my cold has really broken and I feel crap! I feel cold, runny nose and coughing etc. As I have asthma I hope it does not go onto my chest.

Well Rosemary Conley, you know I was getting a bit fed up but I am having a re-enthuse! I found my old RC membership card from two years ago and my weight now was the date I joined! So for a minute I thought my weight was the same now as then and felt really pissed off, then realised my weight was better so felt encouraged! I've realised that exercise is not the key! People often say exercise will help you lose weight etc and maybe it will for some people BUT for those of us with problems with food I think we need to tackle the food problems too! I mean I used up over 1,000 calories on my walk (apparently) but I could put that on in three Mars bars and I could eat them a lot quicker than I could do the walk! So as well as the exercise I really do need to get my head around the food side. For me there really is only one answer, don't buy it, don't keep it in the house and don't open it! Anyway enough wittering, no baby related news!

Hippy please don?t get worried about dates and numbers, they are only numbers! See above my RC experience!

Tank hope you are not eating too many of those chocs!

40somemum, Hippy, BB, Jolls and Alba love to you and all

Morning Things ok here - party very hectic Sat , yesterday I think it hit me, but feeling better today. I've just rang the drs to ask whether I need to come in/get a record of the mc on the 'system' and recpetionist has boooked me in to see the emergency dr . Not sure it's needed at all, and I will no doubt sit there feeling a bit of a div . I suppose I could plead ignorance about anti-D?? but other than that not sure what to say realy...
Anyway, feeling more myself and fingers crossed will be heading towards the vest and pants stage asap. Does anyone know if the bleeding counts as cd1 as I was only 6 weeks, or do I have to wait for a proper period before a new cycle starts again?Congrats to you Tank - is that 3 of you on the bench now?
Italian I think you're right about exercise and losing weight - the tendency is very much to overcompensate. I remember a woman at SW putting on 3 Ibs one week and deperately suggesting it might be the extra muscle she had put on from taking the stairs at work rather than the lift . If it were so easy...
Love to all and thanks so much for all the help and advice. It's been a real lifeline for me x

Hi Diege, I counted the bleeding as CD1, but I lied about adapted the date when I went for 8 week scan to be exactly 2 weeks before the day that I thought I'd Ov'd (only CD12), and no surprise that date agreed exactly with scan.

Very best of luck for this month, they do say you get a fertility boost immediately afterwards, so crossing my fingers for you.

Thanks Alba. Do yu know if I should start taking agnus castus again as of today? I'm still taking preg vits, plus extra folic acid, but not sure if the AC would mess my hormones on this occasion?
Feeling stupidly nervous about seeing the gp . They're the sort (not sure who I'll see) who just sit there and let you start talking, and I'm the sort that when nervous just babbles...I could do with 'how are things today mrs diege?' to get me going

Sorry, no idea on agnus castus, have never taken it. I did mention the early MC to the GP, just for the record like you're doing, I don't think he put anything in my notes, though it's in my pg notes (but that's because they asked me about previous pregnancies).

Oh to have a lovely sympathetic GP like Hippy's. I hope the appointment goes ok for you and they turn out to be both sympathetic and helpful. It's awful to go through, whatever stage it's at, if the Dr isn't lovely and kind, treat yourself to yummy chocolate cake afterwards for comfort instead. (chocolate has iron, your levels likely low, so it has to be good for you on so many levels ).

Thanks Alba! I'm off for the apointment now, and will certainly be passing the chocolate aisle at Aldis, good appointment or not!
Treating ourselves to fish and chips tonight as dd3's actual birthday today and she wants a candle in a chip Strange child

alba good to 'see' you. hope all is going well with little Beany DeTemple. XXX

diege worth getting it noted I think, yes. I hope your GP is nice. Alba is right mine is sooo lovely (how the heck am i gonna get her to move to the IOW with us ). i'm so sorry you're having to go through this, no matter how early it happens it is always a disappointment, but I guess the way to view it is that if it wasn't gonna make the distance beter to stop now. Your body will recover quickly and you'll be back in the game soon, matey.

spotty were you the one who was doubting whether your DH was achieving things??? I guess we an safely say that he was! or maybe it curly - i keep getting those two names muddled up cos they sound similar - i've been both spotty and curly in my time

I am finding being back at work ok now. Still find it odd every time i go to the loo. I just can't help but think about the two times i've MC'd - both times i first saw blood in the flippin' work toilets - ahhh happy memories.

I still have a week to go before i can even think about testing, so nothing to report here.

Love to the preggos on the bench.

Hi Hippy! I know what you mean about toilets. I still won't go to the one on the the end on B corridor at work as that is where I started spotting with the mmc. Not too long now before you enter the frenzy of should I test/should I wait!
Well, dr was embarrassingly rubbish. I felt bad for her tbh. She clearly knows very little about pregnancy/fertility issues. Had never heard of agnus castus, or the use of progesterone , and said that they'd need to ring up someone at the hospital if I ever wanted to talk about things like that . She is I'm told very good for anything skin related . So, I was left waffling as no intros etc as I thought, she had a feel of my tummy, (all fine) and has referred me to epu for a scan tomorrow. |A bit ott I think, but she thinks it's good to establish all has gone. Will be odd going back there, but at least I have the psychological advantage of knowing there's nothing there. I think I'm starting to see why people go private now!

hi guy,

wow, lots of great news - and some really sad... thinking of you all.

I'm no further forward - suck between doctors, still trying to get a gyno to look at my scans and tell me what I should do... not feeling very positive and the mo, hence the silence and not being pro-active in chasing down my results...
now day 13 of 24 day cycle - ovulated on friday.. though not expecting anything this month, as dh 'too tired' to swi on thurs and fri (rowed)so didn't do the deed until sat morning, which is probably too late... anyway if tubes blocked then not much point anyway !
why do my fertile days always fall during the week...?

GG please don't stay away completely, you're the snug medical expert. You always seem to know about tests and suppliments etc
we need you.
diege hope scan goes ok tomorrow. Enjoy the fish and chips. My ds2 has a build a bear we bought from a charity shop. One night he dropped it and it said 'I love you' he so believed it was really talking to him.
I didn't even know you could make talking ones.
40some a cushion sounds good, a cold hard bench is not good for my farmer giles
Igh well done, that was a long walk, you were lucky with the weather, it rained all day here. Hope your cold gets better soon.
BB are you next to test? FX
Hippy 'twas me with the tissue sniffing quandry. (I never did, by the way). Anyway I oved a week early which caught us unawares so the only SWI was a SWOI, I thought we had no chance. So we did some switi when he thought I was oving. I haven't actually told DH yet as I had a very very faint line on Thursday at 11dpo and will only be cd28 tomorrow and still getting faint lines. Want to be really sure. I've had a little nausea and a bit dizzy/lightheaded but really nothing much. I'm a hg sufferer too so am dreading but wanting that to start soon.
Gum good idea about the scan, my GP is really nice and will make something up to get me an early scan (he did last time but it was bad news anyway) I will wait to 7/8 wks if I get that far
Tank share the chocs, I've got a family galaxy bar if you want a bit.

Hi to everyone else

(kicks off her shoes and settles on the snug couch for a moan, though all the important stuff is ok really)

Italian 5 hours that brilliant - you are going to be so GLAM by May - I have visions of you appearing in Hello magazine in Feb 2012 with your newborn I hope you hold out for a good payment xx

Hippy yeah - we switi-ed

On a serious note, the EMSp did seem to work well. After 4 or 5 unsucessful months (not sure if we had a cp the first month we tired, we moved onto the EMSp for month 6 and 7 and I think I was pg both times. The first month I was 4 days late, so I assume that was an early loss, and then got pg again in month 7.

I wonder if it worked so much better cos it gets a good sperm production goign by staring to swi every other day from day 8, and using the OPKs, you get 3 full days of SWI in, before day or 2 off and one for luck (which sounds a bit like SWITI to me).

It's quite tough going for oldies like us, and I think we would have struggled if we had a toddler waking us up - however, to make it easier, I reckon if you get a pos on an opk, you don't really need to have penetrative DTD before you get the pos opk... iyswim

Diege my GP is rubbish too - maybe you should try the emsp this month?

So here's my double moan...

(1) went out with some childless 29 year olds last night to the pub... who started a debate on whether they wanted children or not... apparently they will hire full time nannies because it is important to maintain their professional identity... aye right... Then one of them said, they thought it was irresponsible for a woman to ttc once she got to 35 They all know our history, so I had no hestiation in delivering a set piece on the nature of risk and having/losing children. I did leave out I'm 40 and up the duff, but I am still fantatising about banging her head on the table.... AIBU?

(2) saw GP last week and told him we would be using independent midwives - which he was fine about... as he knows sod all about ante-natal care. So today he phoned me at work to say he had spoken to the NHS midwife at the practice and apparently I am at high risk after all and need special tream .

This is really annoying, because no one has thought about my individual risk. I am 6 months past my 40th b'day, but I have a healthy bmi, a good obestric history, good diet, not drinking, don't smoke and will have first class ante-natal care - so actually I think I am probably not that high risk at all... but nobody cares, because I tick the over 40 category.... AGGHHHHH

So he said, I recommend that you get your antenatal care from within the NHS - and I went, but you're not within the NHS though... (Not many people are aware that all GPs are self-employed private contractors, who sell their services to the NHS)... so I was a grumpy cow with him too...

Time for some chocolate, I think...

diege has the bleeding tailed off yet? I only ask as it may be a bit early for the all clear from the scan. I had my scan about 9 days after i started bleeding and they were able to confirm that i was back to square one. I guess it's probably too late to mention it to you now as the scan is booked for tomorrow. Hopefully you'll get the all clear but be aware that they MAY say there is till some retained product (lovely phrase and you need another scan). Will be thinking of you, hon. xx

tank sorry you've had a hard time. I confess I used to be one of the 'people shouldn't have babies after 40 - it's too risky' brigade.

Then I hit 41 and realised I'd wanted another one for some time but it was only when Dh said he wanted another that I let myself voice it. So much back tracking and being hypocrytical from me . I now realise, OF COURSE, that it was none of my business before what people did and what age they were when they had their children. Maybe those 20 somethings will come to realise it too - when they grow up .

Sorry to hear the NHS are giving you grief. You don't sound high risk to me either but unfortunately in the eyes of the NHS anything over 37 is decrepid and ancient.

Wishing you well anyway . Here is the credit card (i hid it from you before) go shopping - fill ya boots!

spotty funny that your fun shag turned into SWI. That kinda happened to us this month as we did what DH refers to as a friendly match and then afterwards i peed on an OPK and got the go ahead so had to inform him it was actually a league match and not a friendly after all.

jolls are you ok, you're very quite. I miss you.

lol @ Hippy and her league match

I am eating copious amounts of chocoalte. I would offer it round, but I need it all.

My (non-NHS) midwife is lovely. She says most of the risk stuff is crap - and that if you ante-natal care is good, and you're in reasonable shape your risk aren't really that much higher. I love her, I think.

I'm guessing that's coal covered in chocolate ???? cravings for coal already tank?

HI everyone.
Spotty, I'm in the same boat. Only 13 dpo today and would normally have RTD yesterday or today, and I took another test this a.m and still faint. Starting to wonder if I'm imagining it all. DH has been away, and got home late last night,but I'm feeling reluctant to say anything for a while.I just want to be sure.

I do have a digital, but afraid to use it yet.Worried it will say "not pregnant"!

On the other hand I had a high temp this am, and have had a lot of symptoms. Feeling quite sick - it seems early to be feeling like this. So then I worry it is twins, but then if it was, I'd have good strong positive tests, wouldn't I?

Oh god, I wish I didn't over think everything. I just wish I knew it was a sure thing and I'd go right over to Isabella Oliver and stock up on gorgeous things!!

Tank, that's just silly putting you in the high risk category! When I had last DS I was 41, and had copious braxton hicks from early on, which was considered possible contractions, which meant extra scans, but I was never considered high risk. I went on to have a mw assisted birth with no problems at all.

And as for those 29 year olds, they have no idea do they? I guess they've been sucked into the vortex that is the media - claiming that anyone over 35 must be truly ancient and in need of serious cosmetic surgery. Certainly shouldn't be having babies.
Bloody Hell, 35 is positively juvenile!

Hope everyone else is feeling alright.

Thinking of you Deige. Let us know how the scan goes.

Hello all - italian thanks for thinking of us all - this thread is very up and down at the moment..

Greyhound you are so 'together' sounding about the weightloss. I find getting started difficult it am really good at dieting when i get in the zone. I am very good at not eating and then saving all my calories for a lovely huge evening meal
my latest dieting finds is tinned fruit ( feel like pudding no fat) and those chocolate drinks 39 cals. I also cake diet where instead of lunch i just have cake - fills me up no end! all my dieting tips are ad but work

GG hoping you get some clarity soon

Hippy - how depressing for you - sadly my obsession with the tools of doom clearblue with conception indicator ,means i know mine are going wrong way before my body does...

spotty sox what a sweet story

gum it's sounding all good from where i am sitting - i think it might well be time to crack open the digital!!

Diege you sound like a lovely Mum i am loving the candle in a chip imagery!
Hope you are feeling better - re the cd thing - i was looking back to my ridiculously well documented last proper m/c which was in May ( election day no less for my erpc and yes i still voted the polling station was upstairs and i had to hang on to the hand rail and stop half way!) any way i digress - the erpc was day one then i ovulated on day 21 exactly a week later than usual so it took maybe a week for the hormones to normalise,hth.

Well i have had 24 hours from hell of full on cramping and the works so i actually feel very lucky that no doctors were needed and at least my body did something right.

A bit weepy but fine. DP being sweet about ttc but not sure i will go through all this many more times.....

depressing - when i looked at myslef in the mirror of the early pregnancy unit last week i looked about 800 and thought 'maybe it's time to call it quits'
I know i wont though - so there we go - full circle in 3 line

Mine's fruit and nut TankGirl x

40some - I do that circle myself many times a day and MINE's fruit and nut, or G&B Butterscotch which is my absolute fave! Hope you're doing ok. Squeeze for you.

It IS a real up and down at the mo isn't it, with some real positives in our "well along the road" grads, our "not far away from popping" grads and now some "new and fretting every second minute" grads.

And then some very sad recent losses (particularly thinking of Louise today as I know you're AWOL with no laptop, but just cos you're not posting, doesn't mean we're not thinking about you), and then some "bloody hell, how much more SWI, SWITI, herbs, vitamins, faddy diets, grapefruit juice, expensive tests, needles and other therapies and just bloody general obsessing do I have to DO to get a BFP" Snugmembers....

I'm on CD10 today and remembered to start SWI early this month... have breast soreness which I got last month (but never previously)and have had some strange "might be the start of Ov pain" twinges... who bleedin' knows.

Anyway popped in to say hi, say I am still alive and that hippy I am sorry work is getting in the way of MNing - how DARE it....

and PS gum, I LOVED shopping at IsaOli when pg with DS. If it ever happens for me again, with my new budget it'll be more like Primarni .... but of course who cares... all we all want is the end prize... :(

Oh and PPS who's going to start the new fred?

I started a new thread Feisty Fabulous Forty somethings here

Muchlove felt very sad as I read your post from Saturday. I know the pressure to have a baby and to have another. I just hope as you wait for this to happen or not happen, whatever, that you will find some things that will give you some extra joy and happiness and some added purpose in your life, whatever that may be. I think we can re-invent parts of our lives over time and find happiness in unlikely places. Certainly as I have waited for baby number two to arrive (or not, as the case has been) I have found that my work (just part-time administration work for a Christian organisation, which I love) has come to fill some of the ?void? of not having a second child. A few years back I was very upset by any kind of cruelty or violence and could not even read the fliers from Amnesty International. But I felt so sad about people who were tortured and imprisoned for political reason etc so I started writing to my MP about political prisoners, which meant reading the Amnesty website etc and knowing what happens around the world. I am still horrified by violence and cruelty but I am at least able to read enough to write a protest letter or organise a fundraiser for a charity. A few years ago I was not at all keen on animals and had forgotten all my interest in them (as a kid my dad loved animals and my sis and I had numerous pets and visited horses to feed them etc). As an adult I had decided that I was just not into keeping a pet at all. But I felt it would be nice for DD to have a pet, especially as I had not succeeded in giving her a sibling. So I started to look after other people's pets, walk a neighbour?s dog. Now I am a totally pet person!

I guess what I am saying is that you may not have any more children, or you may, but you can choose to use your time, whatever free time you do have, to do or to be whatever you want. It may take time and of course there are exceptions (I would have loved to be a ballerina but I am not going to do a Dawn French and dress in a tutu!). So as you wait I just hope you can find some good things to fill whatever time you have. If this post is meaningless to you, please ignore it.

OOOPPSE this is an old thread!