We're All Going To IBESHA: Last minute budget holiday fun for 30s TTC. Pack your string bikini and your oversized shades and get on board.

[Saladbomb]

Last call for flight SWI101 to Shagaluff. Sangria laced with folic acid on tape. Fake tanned Club reps will be dishing out the 2 for 1 cocktails, dressed in nothing but the most miniscule budgie smugglers. The pit will be manned by sleazy but virile Spanish waiters to provide your every need. Lets see the summer out in BESHley style, IE: starting a bar fight, drinking the place dry and falling over in a heap at the end of the night.

Oh pliz pliz pliz don't worry dearest Score, there is literally zero reason for me to worry; I am just being superly-cautious. However I do think as punishment you should let me have unfettered access to your top bits for the next 48 hours

Is OK I have messaged MNHQ and they are v. swift off the mark with that biz...

LGG They feel hot too... But I think they allus feel hot pre-droid, and I do get PMT about a week beforehand (thank you, God ). Re. tiredness - I also have had a pounding headache for 2 days so suspect I am just run-down. ARGH! MUST NOT MENKUL!

I has left a comment bigging up ma galz (ANONYMOUSLY)!

I think it's the time-old grumble about hormones - why must pre-droid symptoms be so bastard similar to pregnancy ones? Is SO unfair

Congrats on the wriggling baybee Medee, I am reet chuffed for ya! How is the menkul?

Well HB I too am intrigued and excited by your symptoms and daytime napping.... When is the bastard bleepy fucker due?

Oh my poor little OnePot, I was wondering how you were and desperately hoping you would be having a healthy non-puking variety of pregnancy this time.

Ok, I am going to rant. Tis long and boring and pls feel free to move skip to the end unless you have a lot of time on your hands...

Well I am officially in The Worst Mood EVER. The Rage is nothing compared with this. We have in our bedroom the all pervading smell of dead rodent. It has been there for days and is getting worse so I have been sleeping downstairs on the sofa-bed. TG somehow manages to be in the same room as the rotting fetid corpse and even SLEEP in there. I cannot go in there without wanting to decorate the walls with vomit.

The problem is our room is absolutely chock full of crap (old computer, futon mattress, boxes of cables, toy soldiers, toy soldier scenery, TG's childhood books and scrapbooks and photo albums and baby stuff) so it has been tres difficile to find the source. The clutter got even worse lately as we no longer have a spare room (decorated for the short one, and we now have a nursery again for the newb), so everything got dumped in there and you literally have to clamber over boxes of crap to get into bed. Hence the pair of us sleeping in separate rooms lately. TG is rubbish at throwing anything away and it drives me nuts - we just have nowhere to put all this stuff. I am the queen of 'oh throw it away we won't need that... oops we need that' so I probably drive him equally nuts. Anyway, I sorted the nursery out yesterday - spent all day moving furniture, hoovering up mouseshit (oh the joy) and scraping mould off the walls. Oh yes, our house is a delight. From the outside it looks idyllic - thatched barn in honey coloured somerset ham stone. Inside, it is dark, damp and mouldy and I get SAD from Sept because it is so utterly gloomy and just... eurgh. Sorry, bit distracted there. So back to yesterday - I worked my arse off and then did my back in. Great. Then went off to work hoping TG would pick up where I left off. I got home from work at 10.30 to find him glued to sofa playing 'puter games. Went upstairs... stench unbearable, nothing moved/changed etc. Gah...

So I have now spent another day in evil temper moving crap from one room to another (my nesting attempts in nursery are no more) so that I could actually pull out furniture in our room and check for dead rodents. Oh I live the high life. My back is agony, I have not found the critter and I have to go to work again tonight. Waahhhhhhhh. And the stench is getting worse. It seems to be living in my nostrils now and I cannot get rid of it - I will be glad to go to work, so it must be bad! AIBU to cry/wail/scream at TG this evening that I am pregnant god damn it, and should not be humping furniture and boxes of crap around and THAT IS HIS JOB. No? Oh well...

Someone plz to slap/stroke/soothe/feed me? Pref in that order. Sorry, told you it was long. Oh, you just skipped to the end didn't ya? Well done. Now plz to soothe me.

BUT Bangers, you have unlimited access all areas anyway PS Chars!

Oh my poor Poo. What a crock of shite. I thought I detected a non-humorous response to my levity on FB earlier. Fucking piano indeed. Sorry .

Right well. The mouse is in the somewhere - it just needs to be found. And not by you. Put your pregnant foot down and threaten to take Boo and vacate the premises until it's sorted. Too extreme? I think a bout of desperate weeping is called for to jerk him out of his sloth. One fierce bout of sorting should find it. Do you have a general mouse problem, or is it something the cat/dog dragged it? Get him on it. It's the weekend tomorrow and there is No Excuse.

xx

Oh polpot tis yuck. I think you should move into the nearest travelodge with Boo until TG Sorts It Out.

We have a mouse in our kitchen. I wish it would die. My cats couldn't care less and it keeps shitting in my cupboards....

Scorps It was meeeeee who came up with the Mumra insult compliment, when first introducing myself to the Palais "I am indeed barren -my ovaries are so ancient that the Antiques Roadshow is doing a one off special devoted to them, and my womb has been compared to MumRa the Everliving from Thundercats (prior to his daily transformation into a hard mummy thing)."

I loves your blog tis funny. I'll work out how to post on there, by crikey I will. Is it wrong that I picture Mumra when I read your posts?

SickoTart you are more gracious than me. I have instantly reverted to jealous bitter twisted mode, but at the same time I am excited for my brother as he will be ace with kiddywinks. How's the injecting going?

SoreBangers hmmmm.....interesting symptoms after the magic double secks.

Pollypocket there is no hope, is there, that the rodent of which you speak is just an imaginary smell in your nostrils caused by mad hormones?

If your chap can smell it too and there is mouse poo it probably isn't though. In which case as Aries says it is indeed a right crock of shite. Throw his computer away. That'll learn him.

Ps. Scorps pliz can you add The Clangers, Rod Hull, Emu and Pavarotti to your list of implausa-diffed personages? That list was splendid :)

Crossposts again....sorry Poll sounds like a nightmare. Our cat is constantly bringing in creatures that reanimate as soon as they get into our bedroom. Our house sounds scarily similar with regards to tiny windows (cob house tho), piles of shit everywhere, mould, climbing over boxes/clothes/logs, it can get very depressing. If you don't find said rodent then the smell will start to dissipate honestly (and it will turn up later - we've driven ourselves nuts trying to find dead creature only to find it in a boot months later). But dead mouse stench + pregnancy is not good so bloke defintely needs to find it and heave it out.

Fanku hags. I am feeling vey hormonal, teary, tired and narked and cannot tell if it just hormones or if I am actually being reasonable.

TG and Boo are off to MIL's annual summer bbq this weekend so I will be home alone (do not want to go as, although there will be be 70-odd people there and I haz made all the burgers, SIL is going to be there). After her last round of insensitive comments I have stamped my feet and told TG I refuse to spend any time with before the baybees are born (her's is due Feb, did I mention she got diffed both times on first attempt. Gah.} Also told him if he invites her stay here I will move out. Furry muff I think.

Had a thought earlier - maybe the dead thing is in the loft? I'd climb up and have a sniff but I can't get the ladder out of the shed as, guess what, there is too much crap in the way! Do you think it would smell that fetid if just in loft? I'm sure it would... we had a dead thing in loft before and it the stench filled the whole house. I actually got up in the loft with torch, rubber gloves and binbags to search for the bastard but although I could smell it, I couldn't find the fucker so we just had to live it it until it finally disappeared. Yuck.

Rie I'm afraid we do seem to suffer with mice and rats although not usually in the summer. We can always hear them in the loft during autumn\winter and if they get brave/hungry enough, they do venture into the house. Last winter was ok I think but the one before I sat up in bed and watched the little bastards running around our bedroom floor! TG was away for the weekend with Boo, so I got the dog upstairs to scare them off. She promptly jumped on bed, turned around 6 times and curled up. Then the mice came back out. Useless mutt...

I can tell when they are back in the house as they use the beams in the lounge and kitchen to get around (they have big holes in from having bits of machinery attached to them - house twas a granary) and bits of wood and dust fall out and leave a trail over kitchen table. I found some evidence of that today - during the DAY, the little bastards, so I have bought the big guns out. Our mice are too clever for the humane or normal kind of neck-breaking trap, so I resorted to the kind that electrifies the bastards. I have now baited and set them. Doesn't help with the current pong tho...

Sorry, will shut up about pissing rodents now. I am boring myself.

Hope Twinks is ok today.

But I'm going to look like a saddo with imaginary friends if only I leave comments, saying that my 'friends' say such-and-such

Mousedroppings, the bedroom-stink situation is literally SHIT. I can't believe TG is not pulling his finger out about it. His pregnant wife (with her preggo super-sense of smell) shouldn't be sleeping in another bed OR be the one that has to try to look for it. Apart from anything, surely a rotting rodent wouldn't be something particularly clever for a differ to be handling?! And you have Boo to run around after too. Tell him the BESH have spoken and he needs to shift his clutter and find and dispose of the corpse or there'll be a much bigger, man-shaped one to get rid of too. And I speak as someone v messy.

Now, stick your face in my pit - that'll take your mind off the horribleness

Scorps do I need some sort of weird blogging/email account to leave a massage message on your thing? I am thick.

Oh. Oh Poor Twinks. I'm so shit. Hope you're alright today, flower.

I can think of no prouder moment in my entire life than finding out you have named your blog after my lovely uterus. I want to leave a comment but can't I need some sort of weird profile or something technical..

WizzleWozzle, have enabled anonymous comments. If you have a gmail account you can use that, or open id. Give it a go

And Twinks - we are here, loving ya. Don't doubt it.

Thanks for thoughts. I'm fine , actually just feels like any other day. I am still milking it however, and am off for a pedicure in a mo and then to meet a friend for coffee while the child and the boyfriend play at home.

Hurrah for Medee - So glad all is well.

Sympathy and commiserations to Stewpot and Poo.

After all your chat yesterday about CB fertility monitor thingy, I bought one! If I'm not diffed in 2 months I'm going to complain and demand my money back!

Loving the Mumra blog Scropey

Medee - nice work on the little wriggler

polster - I second the throwing away of the 'puter to spur TG into action. Sounds like a trip to the nearest Holiday Inn with Boo is in order if that fails. I don't think dead rodent hunting is something a PG lady should be spending her time doing!

scropy - the blog is tres amusant! As always you never to fail to make me smile. I just wish you could be making us laugh with something other than this subject, for your sake, not mine!

After my meltdown yesterday about long, eratic cyle, guess what... Bastard, bleeping droid turned up earlier. I'm actually relieved more than disappointed. I think I may have miscalculated my OV date and actually my numbers do work out (OV on CD26, 15 day LP to make a 41 day cycle). The only downside to droid arriving today is that I fall victim to the NHS weekend shutdown. My lovely GP has said yes to bloodtests this cycle to see why things are so erratic. Problem is that I'm supposed to have them on day 2, 3 ideally. Guess when that is... yup, Sat and Sun when there is no-one around to take any frigging blood samples! So, will have to make do with CD4 on Mon. Why does no-one work in a hospital at the weekend? The lady I phoned asked why I couldn't just come at some point next week, and seemed put out at the thought that my cycle didn't fit their work pattern

Pliz accept my apologies re. lack of capital letters and spellings, am ashamed of myself. xx

Orca don't worry - the fertility clinic told us days 2, 3 or 4 are fine. Tis very annoying that us 'great unwashed' are not allowed to have medical emergency, appointments or in fact, any requirement of NHS over weekend. I thought Dr's worked tres hard and were on call like all the time. Harumph.

You will be pleased to know I am going to work soon so you will be free of my whining. For a while anyway. Mwahh hhaaa haaaah!

Glad you are milking the day Twinks.

Where is HB? Do you think she is diffed napping again?

Scorpy I have read your blog, tis tres amusing and I do love the title. I am now following it. More plz!

Oh. I just googled mouse poo and pregnancy. Now wish I hadn't.

That is it, I am moving to the parents tomorrow until it is resolved and all poop is gone.

Oh shit poll, really?