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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

30s TTC: Summertime, and the diffin's easy. White goods are jumping and the WOOFLing is high. MSDP in full swing.

1000 replies

MountTheFairy · 21/07/2010 11:07

The one before the BESHory Towers. Easy one for summer: I have dug up a fishing pond in the middle of the Palace, put a roof light over it, got some fishin' sticks and put some Gershwin on. Salad's providing Elderflower Fizz, served by newbs in topless bikinis. Could life be better?

OP posts:
StinkyWizzleteats · 29/07/2010 14:12

Thanks HeadGirl. Pliz to put warning before being so nice to me as tears in the workplace is not such a good look. It would indeed be following in the true spirit of BESH if that would happen. Slaughtering pigeons and so on sounds relatively sane compared to some of the stupid things I've tried to make it work.

It would have been my due date next week and I really really wanted to be pregnant again before it arrived, but now that's just not going to happen, so I'm feeling particularly wibbly and pathetic right now.

Feel free to punch me in the kidneys and give me a swift blow to the muzzle for being so mememe. The bigger the implement used to smite me, the better I think.

StinkyWizzleteats · 29/07/2010 14:17

Drom it was yours and pollys successes that inspired me to see an acupuncturist this week. I had a consultation with him and it seemed to make sense so am going back next week for my first lot of needles. Makes me feel I'm doing something proactive anyway. Did you get as far as the needles bag freebie with your IVF route?

saltyair · 29/07/2010 14:27

Stinkypinky would you like to pop down to the pit? Wibbly and pathetic is ideal, I would say...

No, don't worry about that piano balanced above the very comfy cushion I'd like you to sit on....

StinkyWizzleteats · 29/07/2010 14:29

Oh thanks SaltySeaDog that looks like a comfy place to sit...Is that David Mitchell I see?...

Headbanger · 29/07/2010 14:31
saltyair · 29/07/2010 14:32

Look what I had installed down here -

oh yes, 80s divas a sodastream

OOps Stinky did that hurt? You really must be more careful.....

StinkyWizzleteats · 29/07/2010 14:48

Yum, thanks Pit Lurkers, I feel a bit better now. Oooo look champagne... Yack! Nasty chemical syrup water!
Here try this Bangers and salty it's a new cocktail I invented, snigger.

saltyair · 29/07/2010 15:02

Bleachtini. Yum, not had one of those since I was a student.....Thanks Stinky

Casserole · 29/07/2010 16:20

Foot massage, anyone?

(I'm ok thanks. Still disbelieving. We'll see)

PollyPoo · 29/07/2010 17:27

Stinky I'm sorry about up and coming due date. That is shitty.

Scorpette · 29/07/2010 17:47

Let's get busy with the fizzy! You can put neat Meths in a Soda Stream, right?

Lyra, your droid is an evil fucking bitch. I can only begin to imagine the highs and lows you must have been stealth-menkulling through as you have your longest droid ever (or at least for yonks). Some boffin should invent some clever-bugger type of piss-stick that can tell you within 3 days of Oving if there's a fertilised egg within or not and at least reduce the menkul for womankind. Although I guess that would make us all more aware of chemical pregs, which wouldn't be so good and... I'll shurrup now. I'm just going to bearhug you into a half-Nelson until you pass out then undress you and take pics of me molesting you and plaster them over the internet.

Stinkbomb, is v about farkin 'staff shortages', v about needles but v about acupuncture. It is definitely improving my health and my menstrual workings - it works slowly but surely, so am hopefully going to be babywinning tortoise instead of insta-diff hare. Or summat

SlowSlowQuickQuickSlow, if, erm, yer man's fella's poloneck is too tight to get his head through (if ya get me), then Docs will either put a couple of slits in the top to allow it to widen or sometimes trim the top tightest bit off. Very rarely will they need to do a full circumcision. Sounds grim, poor bloke - and can hardly be sextacular for either of you I know these facts because I love cocks studied all sorts of sexual health fings as part of my MA Diss (even though was Critical Theory-based) and also because I really do love cocks.

Astounding News! My hairdresser has actually given me exactly what I asked for! I feel like something this unique and momentous deserves a double-spread announcement in a national newspaper or summink

Altogether now: "Like she just stepped out of a salo-o-o-on!"...

Casserole · 29/07/2010 17:51

ssh, Pollock, you'll scare it away.

We are... scared, I think. Pregnancy was pretty shitty last time around. Forgot I was terrified when we started ttcing again 14 months ago; the long wait had sort of got me so used to never getting pregnant that I thought I wasn't scared anymore. Turns out I am! MrStew said "I'm sorry" this morning when we looked at the line! He is pleased, excited and scared. I am in De Nile

We iz fucked up. I will be grateful, when I stop being so fucking scared. I know you, and so many on here, understand the bittersweetness of a BESH+.

How's everyone else today? Where are Ockywocky and 12ptArial ?? Are they waiting for us to get naked?

Casserole · 29/07/2010 17:54

Lyra v and for you.

saltyair · 29/07/2010 19:30

was just lolling on the duvets down here and thought about how exciting it is for Cass.

Makes generic 'cola' drink.

Saladbomb · 29/07/2010 19:34

CAAAASSSSSSS! You've got a dumpling in the oven? Woooooohooooo! Epic news, sorry couldn't wait to catch up on everything. Now going back to read the rest so hope alls good with everyone else.

Saladbomb · 29/07/2010 20:07

oh now i feel bad, that bastard droid, sorry lyra hb and aries hope its comfy down in the pit, i'm lowering down some VERY boozy sherry trifle and a jug of tequila sunrise. Can you make a little space as i'll prob be joining you in a few days (if you havent all buggered off by then)

still excited for cass tho, don't feel bad for being afraid, cant imagine how much i am going to shit it if this ever finally happens for me. just feels too unreal.

scorps can't you somehow hack TYF's email account and send the email anyway? He sounds very sweet but he also needs to man up a bit. Must be a very trying situation for you, you're stuck really can you load up on anti histamines? (sorry, slap me, i am sure you will have thought of this)

stinkypoo needles must be freaky! i am tempted by the other kind of needles too , but I dont really have any problems with my cycle length so not sure how this would help me. Although was wonderful for my back and thats twinging again so maybe i should see if i can get 2 for one...

for anyone i missed...

Ocarina · 29/07/2010 20:30

Cassssssssssserrooooooooolllle! Hooray! Am so liking being able to say we told you so! But can imagine the scaredness after last time. I've no idea how these things work, is pregnancy likely to be tough again because it was the first time, or is it more random than that? I'm hoping it's random and so you'll sail through this time.

In the meantime I shall belatedly join the nekkid dancing.

Sympathies on droid to Lyra and Aries, it sucks. Especially when cycles mess with your head. Come join me for twirls and cocktails and the leftover pavlova Mum made for tea.

I'm down in deepest darkest Englandshire hence not wasting time contributing deep meaningful thoughts round here. Just about avoided letting my sister use my laptop before I'd cleared the cache on the browser (autofill things for websites are great but not if she ended up here or on fertility friend or whatever ).

Medee · 29/07/2010 21:21

Cassoulet Woohoo! So, so happy for you!

RunLyraRun · 29/07/2010 22:02

Scorps, your comedy strikethroughs made me wee a bit with laughter. Thanks

slowshow · 29/07/2010 22:27

Fanks Scorpular One. I will have to have a gentle talk with him about seeing the doc. Every time I've tried in the past he's squirmed and yelled "Nooooooooo!"

Ariesgirl · 29/07/2010 22:38

Oh my lovely Cass sorry I have been AWOL all day - this is God's truth that I have only just logged on and found this loveliness. Congratulations and sticky velcro bean vibes heading your way. Very pleased and happy for you.

Shove up HB - I want to join you and David Mitchell and the scones.

MountTheFairy · 29/07/2010 22:44

So, did anyone notice DromDrom was in MN news, ey?

Sorry Lyra it sucks. I had one of those long buggers earlier in the year, and they just make you go crazy.

StinkyTea, wow that's exciting. Ok, maybe not the needles, but you know, propa' stuff. How come all the needles? Is it because you are going for the stimulated cycle? And if I sound like I know what I am talking about, I do not. Hence my silly question re. needles. It's just that I started looking into IUI recently and realised you can go for a 'natural' or 'stimulated' cycle. But like I said, know not what I am talking aboot.

Bugger, just read your other post. So sorry. That truly sucks. But no BESH gets left behind, you know. I can offer cup E bosom for your perusal. Or would you prefer a headbutt. Ok, both it is.

SideShowBob, maybe he'll get 'encouraged' to go to the docs if you have no success in baybee making? I know it requires some patience, but you may find out that either you do not have problems (preferable, obviously) or will kickstart him into action if he really wants a baybee?

OP posts:
MountTheFairy · 29/07/2010 22:47

Scones, someone mentioned scones? And clotted cream? Where, where?

OP posts:
MountTheFairy · 29/07/2010 22:47

had HEAD

OP posts:
Scorpette · 30/07/2010 00:47

Breaking News! No, sadly not that, but TYF did send the email to his ma earlier. It wasn't all apologetic and vague either; was v straightforward (polite, obvy) and mentioned what products we use at home so she can't pretend she doesn't have facts to act on. And he wrote it all for himself!

Then we had a chat about how I get stressed because they're not interested in me, etc., and he acknowledged that they're rude and it hurts him to see it but doesn't know how to change them. So I feel better now in that he'd finally acknowledging that they're crap to me.

Newbs, if you think this is boring, just wait till I'm actually down there!

Oh, and the reason why he doesn't want to go till Monday is cos of the Grand Prix! MENZ!

Lyra, yes, my strike-throughs were entirely comical

I feel like snogging all of youse - who's up first?

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