30s TTC: Summertime, and the diffin's easy. White goods are jumping and the WOOFLing is high. MSDP in full swing.

[MountTheFairy]

The one before the BESHory Towers. Easy one for summer: I have dug up a fishing pond in the middle of the Palace, put a roof light over it, got some fishin' sticks and put some Gershwin on. Salad's providing Elderflower Fizz, served by newbs in topless bikinis. Could life be better?

Good morning, Hags.

Head has the droid come yet or do I have to march you down to Boots on Fleet Street and buy you a S to PO?

Scorps sorry you've got to spend a whole week with your skankbag of a mil, it sounds v stressful. Maybe you should set those creepy ladies with their denture cleaner on her?

I also hate lazy or formulaic writing. Not because I particularly think I can do better, more because I am generally irritable and it annoys me. I can't keep reading a book that contains the phrase 's/he said, simply'. It is the most annoying, lazy thing to write. How do you say something simply? Or not simply? As you can probably tell, I'm a bit hormonal today...

Morning All!

Gin you made me blush and smile lots !!

Bess I regret to inform that the bleeping of the droid grows yet more persistent. I was actually not as far into my cycle as I thought (I got confused because it was 22 days last time, so I thought I was verging on 'late', but that was a blip I think, as I average 25, so am due Saturday, which would make the current rusty rumblings pretty much par for the course).

Sorry to get hopes up - but the MSDP doesn't officially end until mid-September right?!

I heard that summer went on until October, what with global warming n all....

HeadGirl If you turn your back and ignore the Droid really pointedly, it goes away. Is fact.

Drom, I was just shouting at my telly cos of the stooooopid cunty NICE fatfat crap on the news and now I have posted a virtual essay on your fred. WOW, there's some smug and patronising bitches out there!

I know you'll be fine. Little Berwhale is not going to let anyone be mean to his/her Mum and will think you are the most gorgeous perfect thing in the whole world when he/she finally gets to meet you (which you are)

TYF told me last night he thinks we should go to the ILs just Monday to Friday (odd choice, cos MIL's b-day is a week on Saturday). When pushed on the matter, he said I get very moany and obsessive and knows I hate his family I pointed out that I really like them, it's just the crazy chemicals 'n' skank combo that does my head (and immune system) in. I then panicked that he's been sneakily reading this fred Although I know he wouldn't [panic] However, I know what this is about - I am insisting that HE write a lovely email to his Mum to reiterate that the sprays and highly chemical products she uses makes me ill and that I'm v allergic to dust, so could she just alter her cleaning routine a bit before and during our stay. I always write/ring her myself about it and she never does anything about it and I think that if HE writes, she will take it seriously. So NOW, he thinks that if we don't go for very long, it won't make me ill or upset me as much so we can avoid raising the topic. I know how he thinks. I get v ill and sick within 10 mins of arriving and feel ill upon our return for over a week. The email WILL be sent, however long we stay

It's hard to describe, because the house actually looks spotless, it's just that there's no dusting ever done, no-one ever washes their hands and she just sprays everything with hardcore products in lieu of just being more generally hygienic and clean.

I'm boring myself now and I'm not even there, so will shut up now

HB Lalala, I'm not listening to droid evidence

Cass< I've read the first of the Canavan books, but found it a leedle bit too preposterous (apparently, there can be such a thing!).

I probably didn't need to add this as an afterthought to one of my posts on Drom's fred: 'And anyone who jumps down the throats of pedants can piss off before you even start'

Have read and re-read and re-read His Dark Materials about 8 times, Scorps I love them! They're on my face books list on my FB page (I think. Or did I change them to some other children's quartet? Oh yes. Did. Philip Reeve quartet is also excellent) But The Amber Spyglass is a staggering read - when I first got to the end of it, I turned round and read the whole damn lot again. It actually made me re-read Paradise Lost something I barely managed to do for my A Level.

Now going to look at NICE thread and make an adoring post about you all.

face books fave books.

Am frothing at mouth about Drom's fred about BMI. Gah. Smugness.

I'm not going outside T'Palais again...

It's safer not to, salty.

Right, how's everyone doing today? Scorps I'm sure that needles and eating well etc can help with the oestrogen levels. IT WILL HAPPEN.

I liked the Amber Spyglass, then thought the rest ofthe Pullmans were a bit flawed. Has anyone read The Hunger Games? AMAZE!

Not heard of that one Drom who is it by/ plot synopsis pliz.

Does it have any SMUG STUPID WOMEN in it? I have to not go there again, I'll just start swearing and being rude...

Yeah, I'm sidling out a bit. But I love the way that the ESH can descend on a thread en mass and be snootily superior...

Hunger Games - here: www.amazon.co.uk/Hunger-Games-Trilogy/dp/1407109081/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1280319032&sr=1-2 Proper brilliant sci-fi, gorgeously written and very, very scary.

Well, at least that fred shows that Asperger's is far more prevalent amongst women than previously thought. I know we can't always get the tone of voice right over the intertubes, but FFS, the sheer level of irony fail and lack of basic perception over there is staggering! I hate it when people decide someone has said anything and then go on and on and fucking on making their point and criticising the OP (or if in RL, the original speaker), when their point doesn't actually address what was said AND reveals an embarrassing lack of understanding and insight and an embarrassing non-lack of self-importance!

Fanks, Drom

Bloody hell you lot can talk

Guten Tag (or sommat) I have returned from my weekend in Germany & seeing the lovely nephews - 10 wks & 3 yrs old

I've taken ages to catch up with fred, so here goes on some high / low lights - apols to those I've missed!!!

scorps you have been 1 busy lady!! Glad Fri went OKish finishing work, a big YEY to having your blog recognised etc etc, bloody brilliant. Then onto your oestogen (sp?) mallarkey. Am going to investigate in greater detail using my own symptoms.......

I too hate spiders. As does the boyf So mum bought us a spider catcher for Xmas. Its the best thing ever - basically a plastic trap door on the end of a long pole - great.

salad, mounty - are your FC appointments on 9 Sept? If so, count me in as your FC triplet!!!

I missed Sherlock on Sun eve, but a lot of it has been filmed in my home town. Traffic was a farking nightmare!

cho about a million pages ago you asked what I was up to & having a break etc. Well, I'm having a break from Clomid as I'm not convinced its the drug for me. But not having a break from TTC. However, this is the first month off Clomid (taken 3 months)& my droid arrived on CD25. That is by far the shortest month, I'm usually a 31 dayer. So I've no idea what's going on. I'm going for reflexology next week with someone who has been recommended as having diffular successes, so we'll see. I've also had a fun packed July which has lead to massive weight gain. I'm just under the BMI of 30. So that needs tackling too.

salty I'm so sorry you're having a tough time of it. Glad you have a holibob booked, you need it. That diffed woman with the children & the fag sounds a delightm, sheer delight.

For those who have joined me in droid hell, I feel your pain.

Anyhoo, off to try & catch up on t'other stuff now.

Toe stamps, duty free gin & airport toblerone special all round, x

Have whipped up batch of scones if anyone who like one?

Shuddup whoever that was who muttered I am producing baked goods as a substitute for producing a baybee. oh..that was just my subconscious talking

anyhoo, I'll leave them here, next to the clotted cream and jam...

Hello PriestessesOfBesh,

laurie, good for you off the Clomid...you know how I feel about that time-wasting, maker-of-menkul...get down to your FC in September and let's see shit starting to happen. Don't take any BMI nonsense from t hem either...I was told off for having a healthy BMI...because it was approaching the top end, FFS!

Zooming past to grab at Salty's Devonshire creamy delights (and her scones with cream and jam on) and to second the love for Hunger Games and Dark Materials. New Hunger Games book is out very soon I think. I just finished reading the first one again in anticipation.

LOZZA! Don't slip out of those PVC lederhosen just yet Glad to have you back, mein liebling. I think it's good you're having a Clomid break too. I agree with Chokehold on that subject. Sometimes, reducing the stress of taking stuff that's supposed to make you more fertile could make you more fertile than the actual stuff (IYSWIM)!

Well, have come back from gym to find email from Needles. She made a slight error - oestrogen not mental high, just at highest range possible before it tips over into shitness. This makes things difficult but not impossible and much more easy to treat with lifestyle and needling (although will be slow process - great, cos I've got all the time in the world ).

salty have you really made scones? Wantwantwantwantwant to the point of obsession now. And as you are in brizzle this puts you in serious danger of being stalked by a deranged hormonal loon who you have turned to madness with cream tea talk.

Be afraid, be very afraid

scorchin'scorps that is A Good Thing though, yes? Well, a better thing at least...

I have a vision of Stinker as a Roadrunner, rushing to grab a scone and rushing off again, narrowly missing the giant box of ACME brand tampons poised to fall on her head

Salty, you do whatever you need to heal yourself. If delicious baked goods are wrong then I don't ever want to be right Can I lick your mixing bowl?

And if there's any cake mix left, can I have some of that too, HURHUR

Scorps you filthy BESH, leave salty's bowl alone

I want scones with jam n cream more than anything right now.

I've just eaten 13 chocolates out of a box, and I feel a bit sick now...I'll never forgive myself if I hurt my baybee with Thornton's Continentals...

Were any of them BOOZY Cho? You'll go straight to hell!