Poncetastic Christmas 2024

[StiffyByngsDogBartholomew]

@vivajen hasn't posted on MN for a year so I've taken the bull by the horns. I can't wait any longer !
Wherever you are, Fellatio, here's to you. I hope you're brining a turkey and had crafting authentic organic woven tinsel somewhere.
"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.
So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.
Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.
Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

🎄🎄🎄🎄

@RainbowZebraWarrior That candle is beautiful.

We always have an Advent candle but they've become increasingly hard to find in shops. I'm sort of thinking about making my own.

Thank you.

For advent candles, TK Maxx is your place. I got a beautiful one there a couple of years ago.

For advent candles, TK Maxx is your place. I got a beautiful one there a couple of years ago.

I never thought of TK Maxx. I'll pop in next time I'm in the vicinity.

Ohhh I've been meaning to try candle decoupage! I've got two white pillar candles so I could give it a go. Problem is I'm meant to be having a very pared back white, green and gold theme this year...will think about it.

If you can find a nice ivy napkin like this, it would look beautiful against a white candle and still be in keeping with your colour scheme

That's true! I've seen something at EB that might be subtle enough, so I might try that if I order any bits and bobs from there...I just don't want to detract from the greenery and strictly speaking white is better for the theme I've got in mind. I'll have to try a mock-up; luckily wrapping a napkin round a candle isn't difficult so I'll be able to get a sense of whether or not I like it! The one you made looks fab.

@RainbowZebraWarrior Beautiful! 😍

Just toddled along to the factory outlet place on the edge of my village. I don't come often as its just too tempting (great kitchenware, bedding etc)

Saw these and couldn't resist a few dozen 70p each for taper candles! I'm hoping my DD might be up for a bit of creative decoration.

@RainbowZebraWarrior How exciting! Good luck with your taper candles, I would love to see what you and your daughter cone up with. I might try and paint some tiny robins 😊

I've ordered some non-toxic paints and a 12 pack of candles, I'm wondering if DH might like to join in 🤔 Maybe I'll plan a crafty at home date night and trick him into doing them with me 😄

How safely do the decoupaged candles burn? I might have to try making one and do a safety test before I’d fully trust the concept.

I’ve been tempted to try Nigella’s brined turkey for years but when it comes to it, the thoughts of wrestling the huge wet thing about worry me. I picture myself as a sort of female Mr Bean type, flooding the kitchen with salmonella flavoured brining water.

I’m definitely overthinking everything right now.

It's half term here, my felt has arrived for my star, not convinced by the glittery stuff, but I'll give it a go. Haven't actually got round to doing anything poncey yet as it's been sunny so have been busy in the garden instead. Rain forecast from Thursday onwards so will hopefully get going then.

I know the thicker candles burn down fine without issues in my experience however not sure about the longer thin ones.

I seem to be the outlier on Nigella's turkey - we did it some years ago and we really, really didn't like it. Thankfully we had had the sense to try it out for Thanksgiving that year (just as a novelty), because we would all have been sorely disappointed had it been our Christmas dinner!

I've got Nigella's book but never fancied brining the turkey as it seems like a huge vat of salmonella germs to be disposed of afterwards (I know the salt probably kills them but it just seems ewww).

@LaChatte those stars were amazing, you'll have to share as you make it!

I'm just reading the crochet church instructions again! Was going to start it tonight but had forgotten dd2 was out for a school open evening as student in charge of y7 helpers. I told her to make sure her "staff" stayed in line 🤣 she was not impressed!

All this talk of Nigellas turkey reminds me of my attempt to do the ham in cola. I put it in a pan with the spices. Poured on coke. Switched on heat. Decided pan was too small.

Git a bigger pan and tipped ham into it but it got stuck and then dislodged and splashed into coke in big pan, covering me and kitchen in slightly hammy cola.

I'm vegetarian and had a word with myself about the poncing pain I was putting myself through. 😄

@lucysmam is it a pattern issue with the church? Do you want to post a picture of the pattern?

@RainbowZebraWarrior your candle looks stunning, what a great idea.

Transform Candles with Decoupage: A Beginner's Guide – Decoupage Napkins.Com
https://decoupagenapkins.com/blogs/project-ideas-blog/light-up-your-decor-easy-steps-to-decoupage-candle-masterpieces#:~:text=The%20Burn%20Test,a%20beautiful%20piece%20of%20decor.

I found this so it looks like it is safe to do as well - they would make a nice present with a candle holder in a little bag.

I actually prefer your design though @RainbowZebraWarrior

Right, I'm off to the big craft store to get the bits and pieces I don't already have at home (mostly coton embroidery thread). I've been very organised and made myself a little swatch card of stuff I've already got so I can test the different colours out.
For my first attempt the star I think I'm going to go with the yellows and gold.

@LaChatte
I am so looking forward to seeing it in progress.

@LaChatte I am insanely impressed by your commitment to the cause! Amazing organisation! Did you buy everything you went looking for? (and then some extra randomness you didn't know you needed)?

I got most of what I was after and soooo much unplanned stuff and now have a beautiful selection of beads and sequins 🤩.

Tonight I have started the first step of soaking the felt, it will dry overnight and I'll start the cutting process tomorrow.

DH found a video online about making your own metallic felt using golden lycra ! I found some today and am going to try that tomorrow too as I'm really not convinced that the glitter felt I ordered online will work.

We’ve recently started experimenting with brining chicken and turkey and the nice taste outweighs the horrors of salmonella water 😂 (though to be fair I’ve only now realised the risks we are taking….)

Started filtering my infused gin into bottles last night. Spilt quite a lot on my hands as I was filtering through a linen napkin as I couldn’t find my muslins. Tasted great though 😳