Poncetastic Christmas 2024

[StiffyByngsDogBartholomew]

@vivajen hasn't posted on MN for a year so I've taken the bull by the horns. I can't wait any longer !
Wherever you are, Fellatio, here's to you. I hope you're brining a turkey and had crafting authentic organic woven tinsel somewhere.
"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.
So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.
Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.
Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

🎄🎄🎄🎄

And words can't express how delighted I am with how these turned out. I'm going to make 3 more after the new year to give a full set of 8

This is how I'm using them

Ohhhh @StiffyByngsDogBartholomew they are perfectly wonderful! I really love them.

Hello all!

I've been awol - not much poncing going on other than in the kitchen 🙈

Biscotti, mince pies and gingerbread house on the go today. Dd2 has some gingerbread dough left too so may turn it into gingerbread men at some point.

How ready is everyone?

This is my mise en place list for the next 2 days 😝

I have tupperware containers stacked, labelled and filled with the dry ingredients for tomorrows baking marathon. I just have to dump them out, add eggs, butter etc and bake.

I'm ill and DH is resting after all his hard building work over the past 8 weeks, so nothing much is getting done. Luckily presents are sorted and wrapped, veg delivery came today, meat is thawing, plan for dinner menu (ILs are hosting, we're cooking) is laid out. Last few things will be bought tonight.

I'm hoping I feel better tomorrow otherwise I might have to stay home and rest! DH might have to do it all himself, which he'd be fine with.

I'm not feeling Christmassy at all tbh but I'm really okay with that.

🎄🎄🎄

Well my poncing has come to a vaguely successful conclusion. We are away from home now, gifts are bought and wrapped, I managed some festive cookery. My cross stitch card (the one I finished!) was very well received and I’m going to finish another for my wife for Christmas morning.

Loving seeing everyone’s photos. Definitely helping with the festive vibes!

@AlicePottery I think your dinosaur gingerbread man in a Christmas jumper has to be the best food I've seen!

@StiffyByngsDogBartholomew love the wreaths, they look fab, they must have taken a lot of work!

I've paused with a cuppa, we've done the supermarket shopping this morning. It was meant to be a click and collect, but the turkey was substituted for a turnip (no not really, they gave us a smaller frozen turkey instead of the fresh, free-range organic turkey with an oxbridge education and 2 forgein holidays a year) and half the rest of the order was missing. Then the refund was rejected. Asda, in case you want to know where to avoid next Christmas

Since then, I've made gingersnaps (scaled down qualities from my gran's recipe who used 2lb of flour per batch!). Next up on my list is frosting some berries and making rum truffles. I think that will be the last of my poncing. From that point on, Christmas day is in the hands of my DH who is in charge of all cooking. I might post some photos of the tree and decorations later

@NowLightOneThousandChristmasLights I hope you feel better soon!

I just made a little candle floral display but really I'm just putting off mopping the floors.

@Christingly sorry about the turkey but your description of the situation is hilarious 😂

@StiffyByngsDogBartholomew they are absolutely beautiful!

@Magnoliasunrise that bouquet looks lovely.

Sorry about the triple post, the app won't let me tag more than one person per post 🙄

No poncing here today as DD wanted to go to Avignon to do her Xmas shopping 🥴 (turns out she actually wanted to go Xmas shoppingfor herself 😂). We got up early and went in for 9 and it was fine, very few people around. Had a lovely hot chocolate and a freshly baked pretzel at the tourist trap market and them went to see the nativity scene at one of the main churches ('nativity scene' doesn't even begin to cover it, it's provencal 'santons' with a full village, river and surrounding countryside) which was genuinely stunning, the amount of work involved is unimaginable, the work of a true master poncer.
I wanted to go to IKEA to pick up some final Christmassy bits to make the table look nice, but it had all gone 😱 although I did manage to find a few things I'd been after in the bargain bit at the end including 4 full rolls of wrapping paper for 1€, and about 20 mini gift bags for 2€, so dead chuffed about that! Now I just have to wrap everyone's presents 😅😅

The turkey situation has been rectified, we have a turkey you'd be happy to indroduce to your mother and after a phone call to customer services we now have a refund approved and £10 to say sorry.

Would you like to see some photos of my sitting room? No turkeys in sight

What I really hate about @AlicePottery is the way she casually tosses in phrases like "wanted to go shopping in Avignon" making me wildly jealous that I have to go shopping in boring old Hastings and she lives in France with rivers running through cribs in churches and festive delicacies cheese a-go-go 😤 😤 😤

je vous DETESTE je vous dis !

Some beautiful photos!.

@Christingly pleased you got turkeygate sorted. I love your turkey humour.

No paper whites here, and I forgot to plant the grape hyacinth bulbs I promised myself I wouldn't forget this year (I always forget). Here's a photo from Tivoli in Copenhagen from yesterday which was full of the most amazing hyacinth displays.

Just about to get on the plane home now. Not much time left for poncing, but that's just fine. Picking boyo (the cat) up in the morning will make both myself and DD more than happy. It's almost Christmas Eve, everyone!!!

Ah yes but @StiffyByngsDogBartholomew I am to be felt very sorry for as we don't have such things as Christmas crackers, mince pies or Christmas pudding here (not to mention I'm almost out of Marmite 😱😱😱). The fact that I'm going to nip out to the fabulously well stocked cheese shop tomorrow morning barely makes up for it 😁

Here's my car boot candle sticks, the centrepiece I made for the coffee table and my mental hallway

@Christingly absolutely love your candlesticks

these are beautiful! Is there more detail about them earlier in the thread?! Very interested!
I havent even managed to follow the thread much less do poncing of my own. It’s Christmas Eve and I just baked the fruit cake and made custard, but I did make an Eton mess with homemade meringues for a family Christmas on the weekend, sharing that to pay my poncing dues!

All so amazing. Well done fellow poncers!
and…. We are all go here. Sunroom is done. I have a large glass of homemade vegan Baileys and all is good!
Merry Christmas to us all.

That all looks lovely @Trumpton

Here's my cheese selection, they all taste divine. I made some rye crackers to go with the cheese, and some veggie sausage rolls. Now snuggling down in front of a film with DD and DH ignoring the fact that I still haven't wrapped any presents 😬

Forgot the photo, must be the Bailey's 😅