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Christmas

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Original poster

Will DD be heartbroken if Santa doesn’t bring requested gift?

171 replies

underthewestway · 17/12/2023 09:15

My DD5 has asked for a huge plastic Disney princess dollhouse from Santa. She is not going to get one, partly because I had already got most of her presents and this is a reasonably last minute swerve, partly because I baulk at paying so much money for a huge pile of plastic that doesn’t do anything and experience suggests won’t get played with, but mostly because we just don’t have the space for it atm.

but I feel awful and am worried she is going to be upset at not getting what she wants. I can still remember being that age and wanting things grown ups viewed as rubbish! I have got her a load of Disney animator dolls and am hoping that will be enough distraction. But does anyone with more experience of this have any words of wisdom?

OP posts:
Autumnleavesss · 17/12/2023 09:18

DD is the same age and I know she would be gutted and not forget about it - I speak from experience over Santa not bringing a pony last year! For something like a dolls house I would have to buy it

comedycentral · 17/12/2023 09:19

Can you return other items for the gift she wants? Is it also available second hand from anywhere? Lots of people sell their used toys at this time of year.

Eekmystro · 17/12/2023 09:19

A couple of years ago my DD asked for a specific barbie house. It was like £350 - no way was I spending that! In the end I found a second hand, good condition barbie house online and bought some additional bits and pieces on Amazon to go with it. Then I explained Santa makes a toy that he thinks each child will like the most and doesn’t always get exactly what children ask for.

Is there an alternative dolls house that would work with the Disney dolls but is much cheaper?

Had she already done her Santa letter? I always tel mine that what they wrote in the letter is what they get and they can’t make last minute changes because Santa needs time to get everything sorted before Xmas.

MrsSkylerWhite · 17/12/2023 09:21

Secondhand?

Eekmystro · 17/12/2023 09:21

My son once asked Santa for “the ability to bend reality to my will”. These kids do like to test us!

Iskpugkk · 17/12/2023 09:21

I’ve told my DC that Father Christmas doesn’t bring big presents like that; he brings medium ones so if she wants big ones they come from us and there can be a discussion

JassyRadlett · 17/12/2023 09:22

For us, Santa has a date cutoff and a spending limit especially for branded stuff, to make it fair for all the children and to prevent the elves from having nervous breakdowns.

Can you tell DD you sent a message to the North Pole and the big man was super sorry but they've already finished all the presents and the elves are onto wrapping presents and packing the sleigh, so it's not possible this year?

jocktamsonsbairn · 17/12/2023 09:22

She will be fine! Like so many of my generation I asked for a Mr Frosty every year and never got one. It never spoiled Christmas and I have very happy memories of all our Christmases!
Just say to her Santa already had her presents sorted and the request was too late plus he knew she didn't have the room to set it out properly to play. If all else fails get her to make a dolls house out of boxes - sometimes the making a mess building something is a great distraction but I'm sure she'll be so happy and excited with what she does get that all will be fine.

Original poster
underthewestway · 17/12/2023 09:22

Oh no! I was hoping this would not be the consensus. Honestly it is less the money than the space. We are getting our house gradually renovated and it is difficult enough to manage where to put things.

OP posts:
TheGirlWhoLived · 17/12/2023 09:23

Unfortunately OP I think the answer is yes… there are some great other options though (kidkraft dolls house, barbie camper, other smaller dolls houses, Asda used to do one for £25!)
but if she wants a house, she wants a house- not that she won’t enjoy the animator dolls too but they aren’t the same thing

HamAndEggAndChips · 17/12/2023 09:24

This is why Santa doesn’t bring big expensive presents in our house. Those are from mum & dad and I can say “are you mad, it costs a fortune”. I’ve always managed my kids’ expectations and said if something is too expensive/big/out of stock. This year one of mine wanted the Beast Lab kit and I pointed out it was very expensive and the effect he was so taken by was kind of a one time deal. I’d rather have the disappointment in advance when we can have a chat about it and find a nice alternative.

Eekmystro · 17/12/2023 09:24

underthewestway · 17/12/2023 09:22

Oh no! I was hoping this would not be the consensus. Honestly it is less the money than the space. We are getting our house gradually renovated and it is difficult enough to manage where to put things.

Is there a smaller version or a small dolls house you could make Disney themed by buying Disney bits to go in it. Size was an issue with the barbie house my DD wanted too. Some of those things are massive!

AutumnComfort · 17/12/2023 09:25

You need to prime her now for not getting it.

Come up with and age friendly reason why it won’t be possible. Then she’s ready for it before Christmas Day.

AutumnCrow · 17/12/2023 09:25

underthewestway · 17/12/2023 09:22

Oh no! I was hoping this would not be the consensus. Honestly it is less the money than the space. We are getting our house gradually renovated and it is difficult enough to manage where to put things.

I'm with you, OP. It's expensive tat she won't even play with much and you haven't got the space.

She'll either not notice or will recover.

TheGirlWhoLived · 17/12/2023 09:25

Is it for Barbie’s or something else? The Barbie dream camper could be a good compromise as it opens out quite big and you can play ‘house’ as it has a kitchen and toilet etc. but it all slots together nice and compact.

imo though 5 is a fab age to get a large doll house 😁

AutumnComfort · 17/12/2023 09:26

underthewestway · 17/12/2023 09:22

Oh no! I was hoping this would not be the consensus. Honestly it is less the money than the space. We are getting our house gradually renovated and it is difficult enough to manage where to put things.

Well then, Santa doesn’t buy things that won’t fit in the house or might get damaged by the renovations.

Cheeesus · 17/12/2023 09:27

If she isn’t getting it, tell her now.

HamAndEggAndChips · 17/12/2023 09:27

When is her birthday? I also employ the “maybe for your birthday” strategy as a test of if they really want something or it’s an advert induced fad.

MyDogCafe · 17/12/2023 09:27

We always bought the things our children asked for. They will often seem like crap to adults but to children they’re not. I’m sure our stuff seems crap to them. If she has asked for it, she may be disappointed so if you’re not going to get it, I’d start managing her expectations now. Are some of the other gifts things she’s asked for?

RaisinforBeing · 17/12/2023 09:28

One of mine was desperate for a singing doll when she was 3, like the Elsa one, but in a different character which was not even a real toy it wasn’t sold, only in her imagination. She opened all her gifts, including the doll I got as a replacement for the non-existent one that I thought she would like instead, looking for the singing doll. After she’s opened all the gifts and realised she didn’t get it she burst into tears. In hindsight I wished I’d found a way to properly explain that the doll didn’t exist (which I thought I had done) but obviously Santa can work miracles in the eyes of a child. She’s now a teenager and laughs about it but it’s not great on Christmas Day to get tears and upset when you’ve tried so hard to get thoughtful gifts you think they’ll appreciate.

I’d probably just buy the toy she wants if it’s not too expensive. Maybe return some other gifts you’ve already bought. I often did this after Christmas. If I’d bought something and it didn’t get played with or seem to be much appreciated I’d sent it back to Amazon.

it’s probably good to say that you won’t get everything on your list but you may get some surprises.

BooksAndHooks · 17/12/2023 09:28

This is one of the reasons he only brings stockings here to manage these sort of requests. I would leave a note saying it was too big for the sleigh and hope she enjoys the Disney dolls instead.

Bobtheamazinggingerdog · 17/12/2023 09:29

santa doesn't bring big/expensive gifts in our house. Why set up such an unworkable situation? Tell her Santa won't be bringing it but she can put it on her birthday list.

TheGirlWhoLived · 17/12/2023 09:29

But it’s Christmas!! She will be so happy, buy it 🥰

Pistolpunk · 17/12/2023 09:30

When my kids believed in Santa I deliberately always didnt give a couple of santa list gifts just so they knew it was ok not to get everything expected and yes they were possibly disappointed but if it was a very much wanted gift they would put their xmas money towards buying it themselves

Tinkeytonkoldfruit · 17/12/2023 09:30

This is why father Christmas only brings presents for the stocking - he can't afford big presents for all the children in the world. You as her parents buy the big presents and then you can have age appropriate conversations about money/what they can ask for, what is too much.