The 2023 Poncetastic Christmas Thread

[VivaJen]

Welcome to the 2023 Poncetastic thread. With a nod to Fellatio (wherever she may be) at the stroke of midnight, let the poncing commence.

"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Thank you 😊

@Gingerbreadhorse
SEDDevelopments on Etsy have done me custom cutters before, I was very pleased with them

Chantilly meringue ice cream made and stashed.
Narcissi in cool dark place.
I am on flight to London tonight. Seeing lovely family and friends and the immersive Monet exhibition. Back on Friday and full tilt into school fayre and Elf the musical. Saturday morning dancing at the Victorian steam train event. We are all going to get tree on Wednesday then I can start on decorating the Christmas room.
Been mildly poncing making costumes for high school play and making doll clothes for smallest dgd baby doll.
Most of my home made cards done and addressed just need to do some ordinary cards to post others on my list.
Hope everyone is enjoying their Poncetastic time.

I was on nights last night and have come home, had a good clean of our bedroom, am just finishing the ironing and then am making some mince pies to put in the freezer.
Off to hobbycraft this morning to get jam jars and over the next couple of days I'm making:
Lychee and rose jam
Apple and thyme jelly (for cheese)
Chilli jelly - got scotch bonnets but need to get some gloves before I tackle them
Gourmet crackers - very good knockoff recipe of those lovely fruited toasts to be found here. You can put whatever you like in them and they are soooo easy it's unbelievable
https://www.recipetineats.com/homemade-gourmet-crackers-with-cranberries/

Also there is a Christmas Tree festival at our local church so if I have time we may pop in there. They also have bollards decorated all around the town with knitted covers done by the Battle Yarn Bombers who do seasonal decorations for the bollards all year round. Our Christmas lights are up too so it looks just lovely

Thanks for that recipe for the crackers @StiffyByngsDogBartholomew - love those crackers with cheese. Will attempt them. Be a nice gift for our neighbours who make us sourdough bread regularly.

I’m planning on trying to get my head organised regards food for Christmas in the next few days. Would like to make some new things. So a few hours going through my Christmas cookbooks and Pinterest board is planned.

I’m going to a wreath making afternoon today so the wreath will be made. And some mulled wine and mince pies consumed!

I miss counted Advent Sundays and thought first Sunday was today so made my Advent candle display on Friday. So I’m a week ahead of myself!

Those crackers look lovely @StiffyByngsDogBartholomew , I'm really tempted to make some for myself.

Agreed, the crackers look great and easily veganised too.
We are having new carpets today, and loft boarding fitted, so by the end of the week I can finish unpacking at long last and go full Poncing mode.
Our tree will go up this weekend and I intend to spend toddler’s naptimes wrapping with a film and a hot chocolate rather than doing DIY.
I am aiming for a ‘fancy roast’ each weekend to audition veg sides. I will experiment with hassleback potatoes and parsnips in the air fryer next.

These look lovely, we have post box toppers but I have never seen bollard toppers before.

I have been absolutely hopeless at poncing this year, just way to much work travel followed by Christmas travel! This weekend is the only one I am home for the rest of the year so plan to get all the Christmas shopping done, get the decorations out and do all the wrapping. Not entirely sure why I am bothering decorating because I am home for around 1 week total of December but it just wont feel like christmas until its done.

I'm not so good at food related poncing but I do love a bit of decor poncing!

Every year we go for a walk and collect Holly and greenery to decorate the house. This is the fireplace garland I made last year using fishing line and fairy lights. Hoping to repeat this year.

I also have to have a wrapping paper colour scheme, anyone else? Inspired by previous posters I may go for mixed jewel tones this year.

Finished buying all the little gifts for DDs advent calendar today which was made for me by my aunty in 1982. I know this as she write the date on the back ! My cousin had one too. My mum lovingly filled it with little presents, some of which were too big to fit in the little boxes. On these occasions she would write a little rhyme with a clue, put this in the box and hide the gift somewhere in the house. Some of the gifts...

pony treats
new tack sponge
glue sticks for glue gun
choc orange Tassimo pods (will do 2 days)
Cheapo cross stitch kits
Friends theme pencils and a notebook which were reduced in the Range
rubbers
fun post it notes
hair frizz tamer

abd because I am a total muggo she also gets a chocolate coin each day

it needs a bit of a freshen up but here it is

I also bought a shed load of Christmas food in Lidl today that can be frozen - a whole octopus (Dd loves it), Swedish stuff for my Julbord, ingredients to make some food for the Christmas Freezer which has arrived from Mum and Dads today. Tomorrow I'm meeting my friend fir coffee in the morning to have a mooch round the garden centre then off home to make jams, chutney, meatballs for kotbullar for julbord and loads of other bits.
yesterday I made a tray of 48 bit sized mince pies and 12 ordinary ones to give myself a head start.
and the piano music is coming on well, I've been practicing a few jazz arrangements :)

Not pouncey at all but very excited and had to share. The tinsel has arrived as as the very foily very 80s/90s mobile decorations has arrived.

Plus the dogs dinner mat and coasters

As I think I've said before. First year in my own place where my bf has given me free rein to decorate so have gone admittedly how I dreamt I would decorate my house as a kid. A little bit. Other bits will be a bit more grown up

Aw @StiffyByngsDogBartholomew what a lovely thing to have. Make the most of her being small enough to enjoy it. ❤️

Which you are of course. Enjoy

my mum did it religiously until I left home at 28 😂
I think it got a bit pricey by that point !

I’ve been looking on with interest and admiration for the last few days.
My crème de framboise is dripping through a jelly bag as I write. I now have to go and scrounge small bottles from my nearest cafe because I am not well organised enough to be truly poncetastic. Wish me luck.

@WhatWouldJeevesDo if you have no luck with the cafe, last year I learned it can be cheaper and more fun to buy and drink tiny wine from Tescos, than buy empty bottles.

That is my Public Service Announcement for today.

Its snowing here and turns out I need to knit myself a lovely new hat as DH’s trapper hat is too small for my fat head.

Thanks. That’s a good idea @BeastOfBODMAS. It was very quiet in the cafe and a cold day so everyone was drinking coffee, and most other things were in cans. I will have to decant some after my next trip to a pub.

Unexpected snow day here so Christmas movie watching and oranges are dehydrating in the air fryer

I thought this might be the thread to ask if anybody on here had ever stuffed a medjool date? Any tips?

And while I am here, I also still need to get white, red and silver chocolates/sweets for our platter. Does anybody have any pointers? Willing to spend a little bit on nice ones.

Oranges dehydrating in the air fryer? Oh, why didn't I think of this? I was saving the (now very sorry looking) ones I've got to do in my mums aga. Off to Google timings and tenps. Thank you!

Up to 3 hours in the air fryer for whole oranges? Bollocks to that, they are going in my mother's aga bottom oven in the morning.

Wish I'd cut and dried the teasles weeks ago now. I kept waiting for a dry day. I'm just going to chop them tomorrow regardless even if they are covered in ice. They can dry out on the aga as well.

Making honey syrup at the weekend for home made marzipan. Hope it doesn't end up too sticky. I'm intending using the kitchen aid rather than get my hands messy.

My dp has a fancy air fryer with a dehydrator setting so didn't them for 6 hours. But as I said I was unexpectedly at home for the day and wasn't planning on using it sooo...