Vegetarians invited themselves for Christmas- got beef ordered!

[EdenFlower]

So, my vegetarian relatives and asked if they can join us for Christmas? I have it planned- joint of beef on order, I've perfected my roast potatoes and like them cooked in beef dripping, likewise the yorkshire pudding, my sprout recipe is cooked with pancetta, starter is parma ham and figs...and so on! Grrr! Now everything will need to adapted to be veggie because I'm not doing two versions of everything. It was already adapted to be gluten free for MIL but now two more special diet guests is a push.

Would it be rude to ask them to bring their own veggie options with them- nut roast and vegetarian gravy or whatever it is they eat?

Why didn’t you just say no?

It’s really not that difficult to buy bistro and a nut roast from any supermarket.
You agreed to host them so I don’t see why that’s such an issue,

Be glad they’re not vegan.

I'd follow the US Marine Corps, improve and adapt do you have a microwave? Get a bag of steam able premixed veg and do it in that? Are they veggie to the extent they wouldn't eat a dish prepared/cooked next to one containing animal products?

Why didn’t you just say no?!

I would have explained your Op…I have it planned-joint of beef on order, I've perfected my roast potatoes and like them cooked in beef dripping, likewise the yorkshire pudding, my sprout recipe is cooked with pancetta, starter is parma ham and figs

I would have to completely change everything we normally do and like for a vegetarian guest, so I doubt they would want to come.

How odd to agree and then complain later.

As they invited themselves just tell them youve already got beef on order, they are welcome to join but could they bring their own vege options.

Id probably just do the potatoes/yorkshires in sunflower oil and the sprouts pancetta less roasted with some chestnuts.

Are they your relatives or DHs? If they’re yours presumably you’re close enough to them to say sorry you’ve already planned the mean. I’m vegetarian and I don’t think it’s out of line to say that!

If it’s DHs family either he cooks or he tells them no. Not your problem don’t get involved.

Planned the *meal

They didn’t invite themselves, you could have said no.

But it’s fine to ask to bring their own main and gravy, it’s your house. They can always say they’re not coming.

Well they ASKEDabd you said yes so yeah, yabu to now tell them to bring their own food.

Yes, that would be very rude!

You haven't actually bought or cooked anything yet, so plenty of time to change your plans.

I didn't say no because it would be rude- and it will be nice to have them there. A bought nut roast and Bisto is not my style, or theirs! I would be embarrassed to serve guests that! My question was would it be rude to ask them to bring their own (which would undoubtedly be home-cooked) with them.

I'd just say no. People who invite themselves piss me off.

If your feeling polite and can want to fit them in say the meets all ordered, the roasties with dripping are in the freezer - you'll need to bring a main and 2 sides.

I’m veggie and is always offer to bring my own main but I really don’t get how picking up a nut roast and ready made gravy from sainsburys is a massive deal. Do you want to make the feel unwelcome as a punishment for inviting themselves?

Don’t adapt what you’ve planned. I’d get them some pre prepared festive option from M&S that you can bung in the oven.

Reminds of when out with DPs family who are all lifelong veggies. We'd got some chips and we were all talking about how thet were the tastiest chips we'd ever eaten. I couldnt work out what the flavour was and it was only after we'd eaten them that I realised the flavour was beef dripping

MIl still sometimes mentions the excellent chips. I didnt have the heart to tell them the tastiness was because of the beef dripping, I just pray we never go back!

If you can't be arsed catering just ask them to bring their own food. Explain you had it already organised and they can't really complain if they invited themselves can they?

I'd personally prefer to bring my own as I'm squeamish but everyone is different!!

Be glad they’re not vegan.

I’m vegan. I’d be fine to bring my own things. I’m a better cook than most so would prefer it anyway. 🤣

My question was would it be rude to ask them to bring their own (which would undoubtedly be home-cooked) with them.

Yes. It would be.

If we're talking rude, many of us would consider it rude to invite yourself to someone else's house for Christmas. So if they've done that, I don't see why you can't say 'yes but you'll have to bring your own main as I've already ordered beef'

Yes, tell them what you have planned and that's what you're planning to cook on the day. Do you not normally have them with you, and has something changed this year so they'd join when they previously haven't? Or have they joined you before and have gone veg since your last Christmas together?

If they're close to you and you want to welcome them at Christmas, I'd just be clear on what you've already planned and brainstorm how vegetarian dishes can fit into that. It's fine for them to bring dishes, if you have space and facilities to keep them hot/reheat them.

Posted too soon. They should offer though, in the context that they’ve invited themselves, being a bit rude might not bother you foo much.

We'd got some chips and we were all talking about how thet were the tastiest chips we'd ever eaten. I couldnt work out what the flavour was and it was only after we'd eaten them that I realised the flavour was beef dripping

So many meat eaters tell stories like that. There’s no way I wouldn’t know something was cooked in beef dripping, huge difference between that and vegetable oil. So

Surely if you are a vegetarian and you are visiting relatives who you know usually cook a traditional roast on Christmas day then you don't expect the host to provide two options just for you?

@CarrotSticks19

Reminds of when out with DPs family who are all lifelong veggies. We'd got some chips and we were all talking about how thet were the tastiest chips we'd ever eaten. I couldnt work out what the flavour was and it was only after we'd eaten them that I realised the flavour was beef dripping

MIl still sometimes mentions the excellent chips. I didnt have the heart to tell them the tastiness was because of the beef dripping, I just pray we never go back!

Did you tell them?

I would have been livid. I guess it would have solved the problem of anyone inviting themselves round.

I think I would give them the choice between you buying a vegetarian main (ask for suggestions) or them bringing something homemade with them.

I think you could fairly easily drop the meat in some of the sides - pancetta can be sprinkled on by those who want it, you could get burrata for them to have with their figs, etc. Roasties are definitely best in animal fat though…

(By the way where can you get good figs in December? I’d love some!)

@EdenFlower

Surely if you are a vegetarian and you are visiting relatives who you know usually cook a traditional roast on Christmas day then you don't expect the host to provide two options just for you?

No, I would always offer to bring something but if I was hosting, I would expect to cater for everyone.