Forced to have the dog or go on holiday and fall out with everyone

[Ilovechoc12]

Hi,

We are large family (6 people - 4 kids under 10) and my dad owns a naughty yap dog that’s not well trained - treated better than the queen and it behaves like a cat hates going out in rain and doesn’t like going outside in bad weather/ rain. It’s a very ott precious well looked after dog. Very old and can be grumpy

They don’t trust this dog with anyone and kennels are the worst thing ever (according to them). So those two things are out the window. They are travelling 250 miles to be around their 3 children all live close to London. Only I’m the suitable candidate to have the dog as my sister has a dog (so precious can’t go there) brother is in the non friendly hotel.

The dog will want to go upstairs, sit on sofas and winge a lot. It’s not well trained as my dad just sits with it constantly. I’ve just had new carpets and is known to piss on carpets at times (but that’s because he’s old or marking his area but he won’t do it again 🤪🤪🤪 )

My boy has the stupid 11 plus at Xmas otherwise we would jump on a plane.

I do want a Christmas with my family and no dog

My mum has booked into a non dog friendly hotel and decided to dump the dog on me. Actually without her asking me only until I asked what is the dog doing she said o can u have it 😡😡😡.

However my 4 kids like the dog and like seeing everyone at Xmas (20 people) with all the cousins and aunty etc …. Over the Xmas season - so I have that to consider

So do you for 4 days over Xmas -

1. Accept the dog and have to get up at 6:30 to walk the dog and I absolutely hate picking up poo. It could piss anywhere down stairs. It’s barks like crazy if there are any birds / cats / fireworks in the night too.

1. Make someone stay in a dog friendly hotel. Which my mother is adamant she is staying in a particular hotel she’s booked which doesn’t allow dogs. So my dad would be by himself with the dog so this will cause friction

1. Piss off out of the country on holiday and have a massive bust up. Only issue my boy has 11 plus after Xmas 🤪 so not sure how much work he should be doing 😬😬😬

It’s stressing me out - we don’t have a dog as we don’t want one and get dumped with this one 😡 but now I’m guilted into we looked after your kids a lot when they were younger so can you help us 😡😡😡😡

What would you do?

Thank you xxxxx

Find a nearby kennel and send the details to your parents. Cite new carpets as the reason.

Alternatively, offer your parents your home as long as they crate the dog, and you and your DH can have the hotel.

@FortunesFave

I'd just accept the dog and put down towels in areas it might pee. But I am a massive fan of all dogs and forgive the naughtiest, most unattractive ones of any crimes.

Yeah, me too. Dogs can do no wrong in my eyes. We're probably not the best people to comment on the OP's 'problem'.

Can your parents stay at your house and look after the dog, they can walk him and pander to him then.

i am a huge dog lover, but would never expect anyone to look after my 2 dogs for me whilst i stay in a hotel.
Tell them they need to find a new hotel that allows dogs. You have 4 kids to look after, a christmas of hostign to prepare for and you cannot have the responsibility of a dog o top of that thats not yours!

Many dogs are unsettled when away from their normal routine. Why does it have to be walked at 6.30 ? Do you not have a garden to let it out for a wee, then walk later?

Just say no, firmly and on repeat.

I'm in Scotland so the idea of a primary age child studying for an exam is utterly bonkers. Whatever even is it for?

So do what you want to do as a family but let your parents know ASAP so that can make alternative plans.

Can’t believe your mother had booked to stay somewhere where no dogs are allowed.

I suspect said mother has jumped to the opportunity to finally have a few days wo said dog!! She might well get just as annoyed at the dog and the way her DH is treating it!
Because let’s be honest, I expect it’s her who is cleaning the carpet when the poor dog has a wee and ‘is just marking his territory’…. not the father.

Your Mum is a massive CF. It's her bloody dog yet she books herself into a hotel that won't accept pets

Tell her that she needs to change her booking because you are not having the dog - end of. Ignore tantrums, tears and threats. Simply keep repeating "it's your dog, not mine, you are responsible for it not me".

This is the thin end of the wedge; if you cave in and have the dog then you will become the defacto dog-sitter.

The schools are reeds, St. John’s, St. George’s …. The head master has said it would be a bad decision to go on holiday as lots of times in the yr to travel not before the 11 plus. But I think he’s covering his back. Normal / above average child who has yet to start revising !!!! He’s done some at school and he refused a tutor (unlike 75% of the class) so he will get into the correct school for him (hopefully) as he’s done no extra work so far 🤪🤪🤪

The children used to large family gatherings that’s the normal ….. it would be weird to have just us 6 but maybe that would be amazing ! Who knows !

I’ll see what the mother thinks to the dog friendly country hotel or can put my dad in travel lodge as they take dogs but that’s unfair on him to be by himself.

Yes and my mother helped loads with childcare but equally she enjoyed it and gave her something to do.

Yes I could give her the option you can have my house and I’ll take the hotel rooms - you have to change the beds and cook for 20 people too 🤣🤣🤣 I do like that suggestion 🤩 then I will get a holiday and won’t be flogged. I hate dog smell though 🤮🤮🤮 and I’d always wondering where he’s sat on my furniture ! He’d defo be allowed upstairs too.

Wow. You’re not overreacting, OP.

Your parents are being super selfish.

Big fat hard no to the dog. How dare they dump it on you. If your dad cares about it so much over anyone else’s feelings then perhaps he should stay at (his) home with it!

You're a lot nicer than me. I love animals but I wouldn't have an untrained dog in my house full stop (I would worry about it peeing/destroying my house, I hate the smell of dog, besides which I have 3 cats - so it would be a definite no). I can't believe what CFs your parents are being. The dog is their responsibility, therefore it's down to them to sort adequate accommodation or a dog sitter.

Book the dog into a kennel either near their house or yours.

You're feeling guilted into taking on an unreasonable ask. It will make your Christmas hell.

Tell them your getting a cage for the dog to live in while it stays with you. If they don’t like it they book into a dog friendly hotel.

There are some really fancy kennels around these days, they aren’t all mini prisons. Maybe have a look for some and send your parents the links?

My god poor dog if it has to stay with someone who hates it so much!! Talk to them, tell them you're not a dog person and you don't want him there

I'd have the dog on this occasion but tell them it's a one-off and they need to book somewhere dog-friendly next time.

It’s their dog, so not your problem.

You don’t want the dog to stay and it will cause more work for you, so tell them straight out that they will need to make other arrangements. Don’t seek excuses, just tell them it doesn’t work for you. I do think it’s bloody cheeky of your mum to insist on bringing the dog but then book herself into a non-dog friendly hotel!

It’s utterly selfish and cruel of the dog owner to behave like this. Call your parents out on their irresponsible behaviour and say no. They need to make proper arrangements and if that means they can’t see family then tough shit. This is what happens when you have a dog; surprise surprise you need to take care of it 365 days a year.

Buy a kennel for the back garden. When DPs drop the dog off, just point to its new home. it will be well worth the expense to be blacklisted from having the filthy thing near you.

Putting in crate/back garden/kennel in garden suggestions arent going to work as it will just bark and bark and bark and then cry. It will annoy any neighbours and stress you especially at night. It is also deeply unfair on the dog who has not asked to be put into this position

Honestly, fuck buying a kennel, crate etc. Make like Zammo and just say no!

Please can people stop with the kennel in the garden suggestions. It's not the poor dogs fault it's badly trained and a dog used to being around it's owner all the time would be traumatised by being in the garden.

I suspect some posters are right - DM has also had enough of her DHs furry friend and doesn't want to share her hotel room with it. Stand firm OP even if it means DF staying in the Travel lodge.

Your DCs will enjoy a big family Christmas more than a holiday at that age.

The dog is not your responsibility.Invite the people without the dog.let them deal with the "dog problem".

Amazed that you would considering blighting your family Christmas with this! The dog owner should stay at a dog friendly hotel, god knows there's enough of them, and have the pleasure of the horrible thing themselves. If not then kennels.

Can you quietly book the dog into a kennel which they don't know about and then take the credit for its care?