Do you have an "Impossible To Buy For" DP? Come hither, share your frustrations and your ideas

[SweatyTits]

I have an "Impossible To Buy For" (ITBF) DP.

There's just nothing he's particularly 'into' and he's pretty happy with the simple things in life.
We don't do 'big' presents for each other so that makes things easier but I still find myself wondering what on earth to get every year!

Added to my DP's pre-existing ITBF-ness, my mother insists that I buy all of her presents to DP as well. And, as if that's not enough it's also my DP's birthday a week before Christmas.

So, DP's ITBF-ness is tripled because I have to buy Christmas presents from me, Christmas presents from my mother, and birthday presents.

We don't do 'big' birthdays though so a few little things are okay.

I usually get DP a jumper or a hoody of some kind, a few bottles of expensive/unusual booze, and a few books as standard.
I also tend to get him a few bits and pieces for his office which would be a horrible, soulless white box if it wasn't for my flourishes

I've bought him a fancy advent calendar but that's not really a Christmas present as such.

At the moment, DP is developing a small hole in his jeans and I'm excited because it means I have another present idea - NEW JEANS

Ladies with ITBF DP's.... tell me your tales of woe, and let's share some ideas!

This is I struck gold! DH was given a pair of Ray Ban sunglasses and had them for years, over the summer they managed to get broken. I managed to get him a new pair for £64.50 in the sale, way more than I’d usually spend on sunglasses but I know he’ll love them and makes a change from the usual trainers, pants, socks etc.

My hard to buy for one liked the little box of Joe & Sephs popcorn that was in his stocking last year, and we eat dinner early with the kids so he likes to have an evening snack, so I’m going to get him some more popcorn and other bits and make him a snack box. Plus a notebook with a design sort of related to something he often says and one of those electric fly zappers because he really hates flies.

I'm more than happy to join the club. DP is teetotal, everything he needs for his hobbies he has or gets himself.
He is a great one for buying experience gifts and regularly finds random stuff to do as a family. You absolutely cannot ask him what he wants- he will appreciate everything and anything given.
We went away for his birthday just a few months into the relationship so I bought some token gifts and a mini cake and hid them in my hand luggage. He actually cried because I'd made so much effort in his eyes.

He made a 3 day weekend of the first birthday of mine I had with him, spa day, night in a hotel, cabaret/dinner do and a photo shoot with my DCs, it still blows my mind!

His birthday is mid November, I've just had major surgery so I can't trawl the shops. So far I have spotted a T-shirt he would like 🤦‍♀️

I got so desperate this year I bought him a personalised registration plate - far more than I normally spend and they’re twatty (imo) but he’s been looking at them online and would never buy one for himself, so I gave in.

In the past I’ve done concert tickets, nights out, clothes, membership to clubs and so on. He always get a Kylie Minogue calendar because he lurves her (and secretly thinks he still has a chance)

Can you make a hamper ? One year I made my DH and bought him posher stuff than we normally have - naice chutneys, jams, coffee, crackers chilli sauce etc, he loved it

As lovely as this sounds to most people, my DH has openly said he doesn’t understand the hampers as gifts thing. My siblings and I often put something like this together for our difficult to buy for DF, and DH is always totally bemused by it. He says, that’s not a gift, that’s a trip to Sainsbury’s...

So he’s not just difficult to buy for, he’s also a bit of an a*hole to buy for.

Hello ladies and commiserations of your ITBF DPs, FILs etc.

Thanks for the suggestion of The Spicery - I'm going to get DP the 12 street food box thing. We make homemade kebabs at least once a week but always with fajita seasoning so this'll vary it up a little bit. Thank you!

Re. the hamper- me and DP always do each other a stocking which is basically a hamper anyway. But I have done 'themed' hampers in the past like the year I bought him loads of American sweets (this was years ago before they were really in the UK), or when I did him an orange hamper (orange flavoured chocolate, booze etc.).

DP would absolutely hate an experience day so that's out.

I bought us a diorama last year which we made together one wet weekend. It was lovely but I'm slightly concerned about my house getting full of random bits of crap we make together if I go down that road. Having said that, I've ordered us a Christmas-themed one to make in December as use as a decoration.

@Sn0tnose do you know the name of the lady in Brighton please?

@GigantosaurusRex Her name is Charis and her website is salvagesister.co.uk She’s on tv a bit so you might recognise her. Bright red hair and really reasonable prices.

Notafootballfan Marcus Chown is a good author for sciencey stuff.

Following for my impossible DH!

Recent purchase has been naice initialled leather notepad from Aspinal - they have other stuff too. Tom Ford aftershave and slippers…every year.

I know he’d love an Ooni but there’s no way it’ll be used until next summer now so feels a bit mean. Especially after the bbq I bought him one Christmas went down like a shit sandwich.

A Readly subscription went down well with DP. He's generally awkward to buy for... I tend towards consumables - fancy cheese and craft beers.

Just some ideas ;
Sil always gets me a bottle of toffee vodka that is awesome , I dont drink it any other time
Read an old Jack higgins novel whilst away on holiday so the sequels will be on my list , I last read it 35 years ago I think
I can never have enough socks as long as the are the right sort
No tools please
Fortnum and Mason breakfast tea bags with a decent Mug
Coffee flask to take to work
Anything to do with Concorde that will fit on desk
Day clay shooting is always great
Any smelly cheese for xmas Camembert Calvados for eg

My brother and his girlfriend. Both mid 30s. Brother is loaded and works abroad. Never met his girlfriend as she lives abroad too. Both coming to stay over Christmas. Know very little about her other than she is Asian. My brother doesn’t really want for much or have many interests, but has high standards and is passionate about an eco friendly life.

DH has over the years had
Monogrammed chilly water bottle , so the kids don’t borrow it.
Key ring from Elvis and Kresse made from old fire hoses. Amazing.
Kitchen Aid kettle so he can have his coffee made with the correct temp water.
Airpods
Fjall Raven backpack
Swiss Army Knife
Leatherman
Hair clippers
Electric toothbrush , I don’t like an electric toothbrush so it was for him!
Celtic and co sheepskin slippers , we have a cold house
Guitar tuner
Headphones , that was before the AirPods
Remote control drone
Phillips lumea alarm ., huge hit !

His only hobby is playing music, so have thrown in leather manuscript cases and metronomes and various music bags.

Especially after the bbq I bought him one Christmas went down like a shit sandwich.

That made me properly laugh 😂

So it’s DH’s birthday tomorrow so if I have any present hits I’ll report back!

My DH isn't into anything whatsoever. Everything I've ever bought him he hasn't been interested in, rarely even wore the clothes I bought for him. I even bought him a Peloton bike for his birthday...he's been on it 3 times in 7 months. So it's basically M&S boxers and aftershave.

The best present I got my DH was a good metal detector, he loves it… Over the years I’ve run out of ideas more and more though till I’m finding myself this year completely flummoxed, and skint sadly. So far I’ve thought of either newspaper from when he was born, or Ancestry DNA application. Obligatory books and maybe a photo in a nice frame. Seems so dull.

DH and I are both terrible for instantly buying anything we want.

My DH is massively into sports but I feel like all the options have been done. Experience days are a bit tricky to organise with 2 small kids but I think I'm going to end buying a track day anyway. He has a big birthday before Christmas so I need 2 things.
I can't buy him clothes because he is SO fussy. He buys stacks of clothes and returns 90+% of them because there will be one little detail he isn't keen on or the fit won't be quite right. The chance of me getting it right is basically zero. I bought some expensive aftershave 2 years ago, it's still unopened. We both like gin. He bought me a gin subscription and we still have 4 unopened bottles. We don't need more gin.
It's hard

I've bought a track experience at Silverstone for the Milestone birthday.
I've bought a gift box of socks from the London Transport Museum shop that are patterned like the different fabrics on different tube lines. He'll enjoy those, he is a bit of a nerd for retro tube signs and stuff. I'll buy some champagne and things for a cream tea for his birthday.
I'm going to buy a selection of German beers and snacks for another Christmas gift. We're Germany fans and got engaged there so German themed gifts often feature. I need a few more things but feel much less panicked than I did.

I'm looking at hoodies from the shop for his football team.

My DH is ITBF too.
Previous successes include
an ember mug
A coffee subscription
Running socks
An everlasting match
Running jacket

Other possibilities are a minipresso to make Nespresso coffee without electricity (camping etc), glass whiskey dropper, and… erm… that’s it… Help! I also need to tell family what he “wants” but he’s another that buys anything he thinks of himself.

Mine I’d a nightmare too. Every couple of years I buy him new slippers from Celtic Sheepskin - in between I rack my brains. His birthday is tomorrow and I’ve bought him a cashmere jumper, since the moths have been at his old one - he’d never think to buy jumpers for himself - so what on earth for Christmas I don’t know.

One year he really maddened me by buying a wheelie briefcase/laptop bag/cabin bag in the Jan sales - he used to go away for work a lot - but had never mentioned such a thing when I’d asked if there was anything he’d like. 😩

I’m also banking the lego guitar and amp for DH.

I bought mine one of those beer machines.

Now I just buy him kegs for it.

Same problem here. Nice beer glasses went down well. Can’t do those again though!
Wondering about cashmere jumper this year, which he would never buy for himself but might actually wear and enjoy.

My DP is like this. He has a couple of hobbies but just bought himself some stuff for one of them - it’s an outdoor hobby so he wanted to use it now before it’s too cold.
He says he has everything he needs and is annoyingly frugal. All his trousers have holes in but he wants to repair them instead of get new ones, and even his favourite biscuits are only 30p, he’s not interested in higher end stuff at all 😬