Poncetastic Christmas 2014

[HopeAndStories]

(Posting FellatioNelson's OP from previous years )
_

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you.

Marking place - I am a ponce

I just had to google it

OK - so I have already decided the main colors for the big tree in the lounge. that will be white & gold.

the kitchen and dining room, doorways & entrance hall will be red, gold and green.

DD just does crazy colors in her room.

The 'powder room' will be black and gold.

Ponce ponce ponce.

If I'm correct, capons are castrated male chicks and are raised for meat, whereas female chicks can be raised to be egg producers or meat. The capons tend to be on the larger side and the oven ready bird is a slightly different shape, less 'chubby'. There was a lot of meat on it though. I don't think there would have been as much on a 7lb turkey, and it was significantly cheaper.

we had capon last year and it was delicious, much nicer and juicier than turkey. Was big enough to feed 5 adults two children and lots left for curry, sandwiches and soup

I'm making these this year as they are sweet and lovely

Capon sounds right up my street. I don't like turkey!

On the one hand I'm thinking 'What's wrong with you people, it's September.'' On the other hand I'm getting quite excited about starting, and will be following all your Christmas boards. I'm still reeling with envy at Hope's Pinterest page....the one with the homemade gifts from last year.

Gatekeeper, we had about 10 big adult portions off our capon. I hope we can have similar this year. The gravy from the juices was amazing.

Those little elves are cute!

I had to google capon too. And I am slightly older than 24! Feel a bit sorry for the poor old capon!

TheOneWithTheHair - no safety pin on my screen! Am on safari on desktop. Had a look on app on my phone but just figured it might be on mobile site? Will have a look.

On the desktop sight you click on choose file, under where you post.

I'm impressed that you can read the desktop sight on your phone! I have desktop on the ipad but mobile sight on my phone.

And neither are working for me still.

Oh I love this thread so much! It's actually become one of my Christmas traditions...

After a couple of rubbish Christmases, I am REALLY excited about this year. My theme (and I never had a theme before, but this one just came to me), is 'Christmas in Narnia', so we're going to get a real tree for the first time, and have lots of natural-looking decorations, and loads of foliage and twiggy bits and berries (fake, so the toddler doesn't poison himself), and pinecones and mistletoe (fake because of berries) and ivy... white lights only on the Christmas tree (but two different sizes of bulb, for extra twinkliness), and we're redecorating the front room in a reddish colour because the pale blue just doesn't work with my Christmas vision.

I am fully committed to poncing it up this year.

I've been going crazy on pinterest, my Christmas boards are here: www.pinterest.com/lucybattenburg/

Here is a picture of my felt advent calendar that I made last year, all the pockets contain little felt decorations that you can put on the tree. It was a major labour of love, and I feel, the pinnacle of my poncey achievements.

I have gone overboard in the past with the home-made gifts, and no-one has appreciated them (well, not as much as I thought they should have, anyway!), but I will be making some small efforts, like mars bar vodka, peanut butter fudge for my dad, and I really want to knit a scarf that looks like a dragon for DS (see picture for my inspiration). We're not going to go mad with presents this year, but do more activities.

I have not revealed the full extent of my plans to DH yet, as he isn't ready to start thinking about Christmas at this point - I have learned from my mistakes in this regard.

Anyway, it is much more fun to plot in secret.

There's a thread in sightstuff. Iat appears to be an Apple issue.

What an excellent thread. I daren't mention such ponciness in real life but I feel I'll be understood here. I've just bought a lovely book called '55 Christmas Balls to Knit', and all the supplies. I intend to knit small, Scandinavian inspired balls that I then incorporate into present wrapping somehow.

I feel relieved to have said (well, typed) that out loud.

Just kicked things off with a big jar of Christmas pudding whiskey steeping. Recipe off this thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/christmas_08/625286-home-made-liqueurs-post-your-recipes-here/AllOnOnePage although I got my measurements all mixed up so I have double the fruit and only 70cl of whiskey plus had no dark brown sugar so used light brown plus some black treacle. Frankly booze plus fruit and sugar and spice - I can't see how it can go wrong.

Will make nigella's chocolate christmas cake again as DH loves it - it is cocoa rich rather than sweet and has lots of prunes too so is lush. I do love nigella,s Christmas book. I have made the spiced chocolate cake, the Christmas rocky roads, the cookies from memory. It is excellent.

Can I join? love all the ponciness but I'm due my DC1 just after Christmas so don't think it'll be a very poncey Christmas....unless hand rearing the meat for the Christmas table counts?! Goose and Turkey :)

This is what I've been trying to share.

1. The new material I bought to make new Christmas sacks for the dcs.

1. Some pinecones I made. There's a green one still in production.

Fingers crossed this works. :)

Yay!

Hand rearing your own meat has to be the height of ponciness!

Lady redecorating your living room to mat h your Christmas theme is poncy dedication at its finest

Chocolate Christmas cake sounds lush. I'll have to look it up. I'll be making about 10 cakes by the time I'm finished!

I can't see pics on the app will have to log on the mobile site to see.

Sooooo.... Is the Nigella brined turkey any good?

Hoping to convince the 'rents to have Christmas at ours this year as we have a new, big house, and a baby. Want to make it lovely but hoping the dinner won't be too much of a huge mission to undertake...

This is my fabric stash for Christmas.
The cats and the dogs are for cushion covers piped with the dotted bias binding. The " lady " fabric to make pinnies with for poncing around
the kitchen in on Christmas morning.
The Nordic is... Just because.

Ive followed all the pinterest boards :)

Whoohoo!! And so it begins!!
Been looking forward to this thread since the last one ended.

Ethelb - To be honest im not sure. I just have visions of a lush greenery garland up the stairs. Im sure I can throw something together. :) We have a ton of Holly in the garden so maybe something using some of that?

I also want some kind of garland on the fireplace. We didn't have much of a fireplace in the old house and the stairs had no spindels etc so weren't right. This year in our new house I intend to make the most of them :)

Marking my place. Amateur ponder but enthusiastic! Pickledvonions done. Fruit steeping for cake . Christmas chutney and chilli jam on list this weekend.