MNers without children

[MrsDanversGlidesAgain]

What's with the board name change out of the blue?

IMO the potential for upset is massive whatever the board (have a look at Middle Eastern topics if you don't believe that). And having a board where childfree by choice and childless not by choice can post seems to have worked so far.

Using your example, it's more like having a board that was either pro-Palestine or pro-Israel by specific request and petitioning by posters that wanted to be able to discuss their views without being derailed and then it being converted to a generic 'Conflict in the Middle East' board.

It's now a different board with different connotations, and is no longer what was pushed for by those that asked for it in the first place. If it works then great, but I can also understand why some childfree posters aren't exactly thrilled, because it's their space that has been changed.

Nope. I don't think it will.

I like the one before more... I would have expect at least popping post on here.
Still on active 🤷

Hopefully people will be sensible and not post on a thread that's about being happy without kids to talk about how upset they are without kids, and vice versa.
But the is mumsnet, so I'm talking out my arse aren't I?! 😂

Why shouldn't it be for people who aren't happy about it? Isn't that a part of being a mnetter without children for some?

It was never intended for parents either but that didn't stop them.

Because whether people accept it or not, there is a difference between people who never wanted kids and are happy without them, and people who wanted children and couldn't have them.

It WAS also for people who were childless. Many commented and were great. It was nice. I am strongly assuming people who fid not make peace with the situation would stick to infertility board, but people who did or were trying to absolutely were on this board.

And it's started already. 🙄

I can also understand why some childfree posters aren't exactly thrilled, because it's their space that has been changed

Put me in the not bothered camp. If someone childfree not by choice comes on here and gets advice and support and a different viewpoint I'm OK with that.

if i was out with friend A who always wanted kids and never had them, the chat we would have would be very different to friend B who never wanted kids and we can go on about all the fun times we have without kids and what a pain it would be to suddenly have them.

I'd not do that to friend A - i'd symphasie and not try and give any "hey look on the upside at being able to do xyz" as THAT WOULD BE TACTLESS!

The name doesn't matter 😁 Some threads here are fantastic, most are great, both childfree and childless post happily living in our no child corner.

At the end of the day, we will all still be the wrong'uns for the rest of MN😂
Should be called MN pariahs😂

Well yes, that's what having different threads are about. If you were discussing being childfree with one friend, that would be one thread. If you were supporting a friend coming to terms with not having children, that would be another thread.

Can't be bothered with getting precious about it. You won't stop people posting anyway unless MN monitors the board full time, and if people come on here and feel it isn't for them then presumably they won't stay or post.

Both groups might have common ground though.

Of course we do.
Different retirement and inheritance issues to parents, different expectations put on us (work, caring for parents etc), stupid comments about our non child status like "but you would be a good mum😱" (though bit different ones), "why do you have big house?" and so on.

But people without children don’t fall into two neat camps of”never wanted children” and “couldn’t have children”. It’s a lot more complicated than that.

To me childfree means something quite different to childless or without children. One means an intentional choice not to have children or at least the intentional choice not to feel sad about and look on the bright side of not having children. The other means people who have perhaps struggled with fertility issues, who perhaps lost pregnancies and who feel desperately sad about not having children.

I like kids and don't enjoy some of the seemingly child hating childfree boards online but I also think that mixing up people potentially grieving a lack of children and those who are happy about that choice is problematic.

MrsDanvers "Well yes, that's what having different threads are about"

tbh I think if someone's upset about not having children, they'd be okay on the main board.

whereas posting "the thing I'm most happy about and grateful for is being childfree" doesn't work on the main board 😂

so I thought we had a childfree space when I heard about the new board - though I missed the drama over the title so didn't have the right info - but we don't have a cheery childfree space.

I always thought the point of this board was for all people without children, by choice or not. If nothing else to try and stop the “but why are you on MUMSnet” comments not that that has worked

I haven’t noticed a particular conflict between the people posting here who would describe themselves as childfree or childless.

I like the new name.

I agree, on all points. I don't recognise any of the usernames complaining about the name change as having been particularly active on the board before the name changed.

It could just be NotMumsNet!

I agree, on all points. I don't recognise any of the usernames complaining about the name change as having been particularly active on the board before the name changed

Seconded, on all points.

tbh I think if someone's upset about not having children, they'd be okay on the main board

TBH I'd regard that as their decision to make, if they could stand all the 'why don't you adopt?' 'get a dog,' and 'don't give up, OP, I met the love of my life at 40 and we have three lovely DC' comments.

I like the change. It’ll stop the idiots who just don’t get it that they are not the same as those without children just because they didn’t have children till their 30s or40s.

I’m not that fussed about childless/child free. I guess I’m both. I’ve never had the opportunity to have DC - I regard myself as “socially infertile”. I’ve never had the opportunity to even find out whether I was actually fertile. Im post-menopausal so definitely childless. So it’s possible to be both. And the end result is pretty h the same ….

It was always intended to be for both childless and childfree posters. I was on the thread discussing names and actually suggested that we use "childless and childfree" in the board title.

We have much in common, some of us may identify as both at times.

This board isn't for discussing infertility or pregnancy loss, there are separate boards for that but we can and have discussed many issues that affect those without children whether it was a free choice or not and whether they are happy, accepting, occasionally a bit sad or very sad about the lack of children.

Stop trying to pigeonhole Childfree women as either devastated and upset or happy and carefree, it is a complex situation with complex feelings.

Quite.