Please someone tell me it’s not THAT painful

[anmummy]

Just watched an episode of one born every minute and this woman was SCREAMING, and I mean screaming from the top of her lungs. She was kicking the bed, trying to roll off of it, and was clearly in agonising uncontrollable unbearable pain. I’m due in 1 week!!! This is not what I needed to see 🤣 I’m so scared. someone tell me their positive stories. This is my first time. I know everyone has a different experience. I’m just hoping I can do this! I’m unbelievably scared now.

First baby not that painful. Did not have any pain relief. Second baby I think was in bad position so long labour and more painful.

Also did hypno for first baby.

Two back to back babies, no pain relief other than a pool. It was honestly no drama but you'd never see it on one born every minute because it wouldn't have made good TV

I really recommend hypnobirthing, it worked like a charm for me

I was induced and had an epidural. It was painful hence the epidural but my labour was less than 4 hours, no intervention and zero tears. I’ll definitely be requesting the same again next time!

It's different for everyone and every birth.

My first felt like it was literally splitting me apart. I wanted to die I was in so much pain. It was absolutely hideous and didn't stop after birth.

My second (unplanned and almost terminated due to the experience with number 1) was very very different - it was a useful pain. I could feel it was doing something purposeful. I actually had a c section with number 2 (elective) but went in to labour before hand.

IT'S NOT A HUGE AMOUNT OF FUN NO!

That said, despite being the least "woo" person on earth, someone convinced me to try hypnobirthing with my second and it did make a difference. Less panic I think? That it was more of a process.

Pool in the living room, 4 paracetamol, midwives turned up about half an hour before he arrived with gas and air which I rejected as laughable at that point.

Back to back for the first one. Absolutely agony. By the time they got the epidural in (had to wait ages for anaesthetist who then hit a nerve) it was somewhat too late and I didn't really feel any benefit.
Two paracetamol and a diazepam for the second. Slept through most of it. Still painful to push but much more doable.

Everyone's pain threshold is different. Everyone deals with childbirth differently. What I will say is that however you get through the pain is right for you and the memory of the pain disappears very very quickly.

I have a very high pain threshold and didn't utter a word in childbirth. It was painful. I didn't have a great experience after the actual labour itself because of various complications but I was out of hospital within 48 hours with DD, had an elective csection with DS three years later because of said complications.

I do agree with PP in that you will see lots of women laying down on their back giving birth and that's not the most natural of positions. Move around if you can. Highly recommend a birthing pool if it's available. X

Screaming like that. Just makes the pain worse.

Look up breathing techniques. They really really work.

There's quite a range.

Contractions hurt in the same way as period pains do. It's manageable, but very very tiring. It's not an agonising pain for the cast majority of people, but your muscles keep going even though they feel tired. You want to take a break, but you can't.

I suspect most of the screaming comes at transition. Have you been to antenatal classes? At transition I was totally desperate to leave the delivery room. I was pacing like a caged animal and virtually snarling atDH. The midwife was totally chilled as that's a very normal instinct.

I did find crowning to be a sudden, sharp pain that I didnt like (I tore). But it was very very brief.

Overall, really not that bad. I feel much more confident this time round. It's a tough endurance test and you make some strange noises... but for most people most of the time it's not agony.

Of course there are no prizes for doing it without pain relief. I didn't find it necessary aside from the birthing pool. I wasn't anti-pain killers, I was waiting to "need" them as I thought it would get unmanageable. It never did and then DD was born.

I would recommenda water birth - stayin mobile makes everything feel easier and less frustrating somehow

I was shocked by how painful it was, I'd say be open minded about pain relief, the epidural was a god send!

I went into in to it expecting the worst. My mum had told me it was like being split in two. I was the last of my NCT group and had heard all their horror stories. And it wasn't actually that bad. In fact I left it really late getting to the hospital as I just thought this couldn't be 'it' as the pain wasn't that bad.

My birth plan had epidural - give me as many drugs as possible please. I rang the maternity unit at 7.30am thinking my contractions were about 6 minutes apart. They told me to wait at home so I had a bath, did my hair and ordered a taxi for 10.30......baby came at 12.30 so no time for drugs other than gas and air. It bloody hurt but a strange kind of pain. Stiches hurt more......

Oh - and I did find that when I went into labour I was on my knees in the front room and growled...

It's true that you don't remember the pain, but I do remember thinking "just in case it's true you don't remember the pain, I must at least remember that it's not that bad". I also remember thinking "I'd much rather be doing this than be the poor bugger that has to stay awake all night being supportive".
The thing about it is that it is an incredibly powerful all consuming experience which, though painful, is also absolutely incredible. One metaphor I heard in pregnancy that stuck with me is that it is like being in the sea at a wild surf beach - if you scrabble to stay in the surface every time a wave comes you'll struggle, but if, rather than fight you dive under and resurface when the wave has passed you'll have a much easier time.

It wasn't like that for me. Everyone is different. I had gas and air and the pain was very manageable for me. So it won't necessarily be difficult to cope with. I will say mine were quick and I think that matters. Pain is easier to cope with over shorter periods of time.

It's a very short period of time in your life and you will forget it very quickly

I got induced and it was so painful once the contractions started and my blood pressure was going a touch too high - took the epidural and had a nap, woke up and had tea and biscuits and got to put my music on and baby was born.
Also made it easier for the stitches I needed to be done too.
You can still feel things with an epidural, I wasn’t completely numb so could still move my legs and felt the pressure of the baby coming out.

I broke my collar bone when Dd was 9 months old. So so much more painful. So I would say less painful than a broken bone, worse than bad period cramps and gas and air is magic.

Somehow some ppl don't seem to get it too bad, my two were back to back, excruciating pain. Epidurals were the only way. It felt like I was being torn in two at the back of my pelvis.

Take.
All.
The.
Drugs.

Sorry OP, it was absolutely excruciating for me and I think I do have relatively high pain threshold (think most of root canal done with no pain relief).

I begged for epidural but it was too late. Then begged for c-section but was dilated to 10cm by that point. And then the forceps came. And then the blood loss. And then being stitched up while feeling most of it. Nightmare.

That’s what I thought before I gave birth. It is painful, but there is an end and you get to hold your baby. Good luck!

And this is why I chose sections.

It does hurt but my second was a fabulous birth. I'd do it again if I had too. It didn't put me off.