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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Sex after birth, how long did you wait?

104 replies

Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 15:45

I’m just curious as to how long people waited to have sex again after birth, obviously different experiences will lead to different time frames.

im 10 days PP and all I want to do is jump on my other half 😂 currently waiting for a tear with stitches to heal so resisting but the urge is unreal! I don’t remember being like this with my first it was 5 weeks.

OP posts:
YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake · 29/07/2023 21:34

4 weeks, pretty much as soon as the bleeding stopped

betterchange · 29/07/2023 21:34

My perineum looked like a 7 yr old had used it as a "my first tapestry kit"for several weeks after DH was born. I remember my DH pestering me for sex and me showing him the mess about 3 weeks after delivery (bits of green nylon stitching poking out everywhere), and him recoiling. It shut him up for a week or two.

Smittenkitchen · 29/07/2023 21:35

That's interesting. I don't live in the UK and didn't know that was NHS advice. The advice in the European country where I live is not before 6 weeks. I understand that the waiting for the cervix to be closed is to do with risk of infection. And waiting 6 weeks for general recovery is a very good idea for a lot of women but I suppose not all.

SouthLondonMum22 · 29/07/2023 21:36

Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 21:33

I honestly think that’s one thing (other than stitches) putting me off! People saying you should wait until 6 weeks due to risk of infection etc.

as for wondering how people can want it that soon, I think after labour I said I would if I could 😂😂 I feel it’s brought me and my partner a lot closer together emotionally which we want to express

Those people are incorrect. Ignore them unless you don't feel ready until 6 weeks or beyond.

Early days - NHS (www.nhs.uk)

nhs.uk

Early days

What to expect in the first few weeks after your baby's birth, including checks, feeding and poo.

https://www.nhs.uk/pregnancy/labour-and-birth/after-the-birth/early-days/

Original poster
Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 21:38

@SouthLondonMum22 thank you for sharing that

OP posts:
Nodramaatleasttoday · 29/07/2023 21:42

After my first ( VB no damage) I felt like doing it after a couple of weeks but the damned bleeding didn’t stop for 6 so it was 6 weeks.
After my c section for DC2 I stopped bleeding after 4 days and I seduced him into some gentle action on day 14.
I really do think it’s a listen to your body thing. I’m a bit funny about ‘clean sex’ so I have to be sure I won’t bleed, but I know lots of people don’t care about that so much and more power to them.
should never do it if it hurts though, that’s a one way ticket to ruining the next few times I reckon.

HippeePrincess · 29/07/2023 21:45

I could have jumped dp within days but baby didn’t sleep so we didn’t get the chance, plus my bleeding was heavy on and off. Waited 2 weeks, it wasn’t great, not painful but just not right, we were back to normal by week 5/6 I’d say.

caringcarer · 29/07/2023 21:52

I waited 6 weeks until my post birth check up. I was just too tired from night feeding.

MaxwellCat · 29/07/2023 21:53

I see these threads often and never sure why it matters how long others wait as inevitable posters come along saying those that didn't wait long were pressured into it by their partners 🙄 it was 2 weeks for me because I wanted to

Original poster
Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 22:00

@MaxwellCat purely posting out of curiosity and to see if anyone else was the same as me so early on

100000% not being pressured in to it to those who do come along, I genuinely want to go at it like a rabbit.

OP posts:
Charley50 · 29/07/2023 22:05

Till I was about 16. Sorry 🤪

Canidoitreally · 29/07/2023 22:08

Just before the six week check up. I wanted to try so I could bring it up at the appointment if there were problems.

I regretted it - felt awful, episiotomy wasn't adequately healed.

wingingit1987 · 29/07/2023 22:11

Usually about 4/5 weeks. We have 5 children, I’ve only had stitches with my eldest and I think I waited til 5 weeks then.

TheFutureFreaksMeOut · 29/07/2023 22:15

8 months!

RedRobyn2021 · 29/07/2023 22:22

Around 8 weeks, it felt really weird and I don't know why I rushed it. I didn't have any tearing.

GG1986 · 29/07/2023 22:24

3 or 4 months with my first - episiotomy and was in pain for quite a long time.
2nd baby is 6 months old and we still haven't! I'm exhausted, been ill on and off since the birth(c-section) I just have no libido at all right now, it's pretty shit.

PinkButtercups · 29/07/2023 22:25

First baby about 2 weeks.

Second and Third baby (twins) was about 3 weeks.

StillWantingADog · 29/07/2023 22:27

I think it was 2-3 months at least maybe more. I was too knackered mostly.

but was totally 😳 when a friend was pregnant again 6 weeks after birth

Redwinestillfine · 29/07/2023 22:27

3 months. 4th degree tear 😿

Original poster
Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 22:31

@StillWantingADog my sister has exactly 11 months between her two… 😬🤯

OP posts:
StillWantingADog · 29/07/2023 22:32

Anonymoususer456 · 29/07/2023 22:31

@StillWantingADog my sister has exactly 11 months between her two… 😬🤯

crazy isn’t it. There were two brothers in my school year growing up who were not twins, one had an October and one a July birthday. Nuts.

HandScreen · 29/07/2023 22:34

3 weeks both times (I had c-sections, so I had the benefit of no damage done at all to the vaginal area!)

Cakeandcoffee93 · 29/07/2023 22:37

Two weeks after an emergency c section - All of the hormones were raging,
no idea what was going on
remember it being wonderful though

Yusay · 29/07/2023 22:38

lavenderdilly · 29/07/2023 21:20

It's pretty individual, the only real answer is - when you feel able to.

No, no it isn’t. Women have died from infection given to them by their partner in sexual activity too soon after birth. It isn’t ’whenever feels good’ it’s ‘whenever it’s medically safe to do so and also it feels good’

Emmamoo89 · 29/07/2023 22:41

About a year. I just wasn't in the mood