help

[saka]

I discharged myself from hospital against medical advice this afternoon, as I couldnt get anyone to take my dd, who is 3.8.

I felt like I was wet down below, like I had wet myself slightly but continuously, was having regular but not strong contractions, like braxton hicks, but every 7 mins and more thn uncomfortbale.

I called friends who said they would take dd and just got asked ;are you SURE this is it, are they sure your waters have gone, have they gone complatetly - given the 4th regree, instead of we are coming and will be there to help. I felt really interrogated and as if I was being a bother.

The doctor said the contractions were regular and a 2.10 on the scale, she wasnt sure if my waters had gone, there was nothing on the test, but she said it could be a slow puncture which was intermittant, and she really wanted me to stay overnight. Ive been more than uncomfortable all day. The baby was fine on the monitor.

I ended up discharing because of lack of childcare, and came home. Im still feeling really tight, and having regular, but not excrutiating contractions. Im 35 weeks now. My legs have gone to jelly, and I really needed to stay put.

Anyway, Ive told friend who was giving me the 4th degree on how important it was that I stay in, to sod off (not feeling like being nice to people, know Im being horrible, but just feeling pretty awful physically)....and said Ill get social services to take dd for a short while. They all had mroe important things to do - oike dates, meetings, or gonig to the museum with nephew tomorrow.

I had a c sectin last time. Im just going to stay where I am, go in if the scar is sore, and if not, if I end up gushing I guess I go in, but will just call an ambulance if I feel like he is actually comign out. Ive had enough. I cant get myself to hospital again, I cant bare the thought of donig much to be honest. I just want to stay put now.

Im feeling so upset that noone cares enough to say 'you stay in if they want you to and dont worry about anyth8ing.' It does hurt. Im 2 cm dilated and I guess I just have to cope.

Sorry. I am not happy being alone right now.

Its all too much

saka

This is just the sort of thing that short term foster care was invented for -- if you go into hospital for a day or two SS will be able to find someone who specialises in this sort of thing to take your DD for a couple of days. It's completely different from "being taken into care".

Sorry not near me, couldnt you get someone else to ring one of your friends, as im sure if they had a call from midwife/doctor or anyone with 'authority' saying "you offered to take saka's dd could you come and collect her please" end of conversation.

saka it really doesnt sound like it is going to go away, and of course ss wont take her away and not give her back. Please call someone. I am involved with ss at the moment (as a parent), and they will not take your dd away. You are simply in desperate need of childcare, and they can help with that.

You sound like you are leaking amniotic fluid.
If you weren't contracting I'd say don't worry it's a small leak, it might heal itself or get you in labour.
It's obviously getting you in labour and it probably won't stop until you give birth.... but the birth could be several hours away still (or not of course!)

Because you are 35 weeks you do need to think about this baby... if things heat up -DO get that ambulance and take your daughter with you... the hospital will sort it out (they don't find it easy but hey thet'll have to!)

they would realise it was serious and be there in a minute, of course you dont ever want to see them again thats because you are going to have a baby, i was a nightmare

I guess if it looks like intensifying Ill take her with me and ask the hosp to call social services.

My dates are a bit dodgy as I had a light period in Jan which only lasted a day or so. The midwife at the hosp said the baby felt quite big and was in a good position. I dont want another section if I can help it - or another prem baby.

I might call one of my friends again and try and get them to understand it isnt an exact science predicting if babies are on the way out and being monitored was what needed to happen. Im just not in the mood for being pleasant. Or if he does make an appearance then him there would make everyone jump. Just feeling a bit antagonistic towards them for letting me down

You could argue with them that you are in a bad mood... sign of labour !!!!!
Tell them you waters have gone, you are contracting and you need to breathe through them as they are that painful!

saka -- at 35 weeks you really want to make sure you have this baby in hospital. Going in with your DD and then getting the hospital to call SS may well be a good plan if you can't get a friend out, but don't leave it too late. Why not call the maternity unit back and see what they suggest?

Just looking at medical notes. What does tightenings (indeciperable word) 2:10 mean?

it is intensifying, from what you are saying, good luk with your friends, but if no luck, get badk to the hosp neway.

It means light contractions 2 in 10 mins (so every 5 mins)... that is pre-labour in technical speak !

how about, go to hosp then get midwife to call ur friends?

Saka -you sound in pre-labour to me too... when your contractions are every 3 mins then worry.... especially if they are really painful.
Did you have a planned or emergency section last time ? Have you laboured before... this impacts the speed at which you can get into full blown labour this time (that's why i am asking).

if she is in early labour, doesn't that mean that labour is goin to come sooner or later?

Saka, where abouts in Essex are you?? I am in leigh on sea, near southend? Is there anthing you want me to do?? My babies are in bed at the mo and will be till at least 5 am, if you are nearby and need me to do ANYTHING, just say the word x

Agree with lemonaid here - see what the m/w's suggest.

Best wishes xxx

Ok....thank you.

The midwife has awful handwriting.

Im going to see how it goes, I think as soon as it gets worse, Ill call an ambulance, take dd with me, and let the hospital sort it out.

Ill make peace (or not) with friends when Im not feeling like screaming obscenities at them.

Its not getting better, and the last tightening got very tight. Ill wait until it is very painful, then go in, that way dd isnt too disturbed and doesnt have to wait around too long.

Ill try and drink some water, and at least eat something sweet, I couldnt face dinner.

Thanks for helping everyone. For what its worth you are all really really helping right now, I dont feel so alone and have managed to stop crying.

Dd was born at 36 weeks. She is fine now. I know he will need help if he makes an appearance tonight,but he will be alright.

They tried to stop labour before with dd. Do they stop labour here at 35/36 weeks here?

saka

Kelly - she could be like this for a week you know... NOT SAYING THIS WILL BE THE CASE! but there are women (there is a mumsnetter at the moment who has been contracting for a week with no progress - millysomething....)
But this is also why I ask if she has laboured before.

No they won't stop labour... i am sure at 35 weeks you'll be fine... it's also a question of size and lungs - don't worry too much about the 35 weeks...

I think they'd ideally like to stall it for 48 hours and give a steroid injection to help lung development, but not sure on timescales. pupuce will know if she's still around.

I was in early labour for two or three days with dd (first) but I am concerned cos this is her second and since it so early.

Leigh on sea is not far at all. Im booked at southend hosp, but dont know if the ambulance would take me to Basildon or Durrant Valley. Im inbetween hospitals, near grays.

If I end up at southend, and it is a reasonable time, would you sit with dd while ss turned up, please?

I want to see how it goes, it might well stay like this for a while.

And I was right, she does know...

Ambulance will take you where you are booked unless they are full...

Lemonaid - I can be wrong -