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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!elective c section am i just a wimp !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

246 replies

dressedupnowheretogo · 03/07/2006 12:58

im thinking of going for an elective c section my feelings towards the birth are getting more and more pulled towards petrified than excited

am i being silly or would i be better off

am worried about everyting and this issue is just adding to it

sorry for being a whinge and a wimp

please help

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Arabica · 04/07/2006 00:24

But Pucca, not all women's bodies can cope with natural births. We aren't all made the same way. My body couldn't cope, and DS got into difficulty as a result. Luckily I didn't feel like a failure after my c/s. But my friend with lots of sisters, all of whom popped out their babies relatively easily, was made to feel less of a woman for undergoing an emergency c/s. it ruined her babymoon period.

claraboo · 04/07/2006 06:16

Each birth is different. Unless your pelvis is too small to fit a baby through, one section does not necessitate another. Just 'cos one birth was tricky, doesn't mean that the others will be.
You can only say that your body had trouble birthing that baby on that occasion not that your body can't cope with a natural birth

helenmelon · 04/07/2006 10:30

Agreed - but if a mother has had a negative birth experience, then an elective is a good option for future children. If it wasn't, many people who end up with emcs wouldn't go on to have any more children - personally, I believe that to be more of a loss as a woman than never experiencing a vaginal delivery.

I am glad I gave it a go with my first, but am definitely going with elective cs for the future. From chatting to other mums, I think a straightforward labour is a very positive way to deliver - the problem is you don't know how it's going to be!!

Booby - go with your instincts and good luck with whatever you decide.

Rhubarb · 04/07/2006 10:33

"make your minge up" LOL! Nice one Soupy!

SoupDragon · 04/07/2006 10:35

"our bodies are made to give birth" isn't strictly true. They were made to give birth until we evolved to walk upright. The compromises this means in terms of our pelvis together with the big heads is why we have trouble giving birth naturally. Unlike the sheep I watched deliver twins without looking more than mildly uncomfortable!!

We can still do it mind you.

SoupDragon · 04/07/2006 10:36

mingetastic

Arabica · 04/07/2006 10:58

Soupdragon, that's exactly what my consultant told me when i went to discuss my forthcoming birth (the walking upright bit, not 'mingetastic'!)

SoupDragon · 04/07/2006 11:00

What a shame he didn't use mingetastic...

We've made lots of compromises to walk upright. Back trouble and piles are 2 others I think

BigSister · 04/07/2006 12:22

Dear boobylicious, Everybody gets anxious/petrified before the birth; this is completely normal. Why though make an active decision to do something other than give birth naturally? If it´s not broken don´t fix it! For me, giving birth was the most incredible experience I would only very very reluctantly forgoe if I had another baby. You can do it too!

hoppybird · 04/07/2006 12:23

Booby - I've been considering whether to go for a VBAC or an elective, and I found that the clinical guidelines on C-Sections from NICE (the National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence) are extremely informative (you need to download the PDF). The link I've put there is specifically aimed at pregnant women (there are more detailed guidelines for doctors). For statistics and comparisons with vaginal deliveries, please have a look on the tables on pages 13, 47, 48 and 49 of these guidelines.

pucca · 04/07/2006 12:26

Oops sorry, there are problems that can occur obviously but the majority of women get through vaginal birth ok.

Toady · 04/07/2006 12:47

Boobylicious

YOUR BODY IS DESIGNED TO GIVE BIRTH TO YOUR BABY.

You can do it and it does not have to be a nightmare, my advice would be to avoid lying flat on your back, being poked by people and being monitored, this increases your stress levels therefore making it more painful.

Of course you could always opt for a home birth, relaxed and familar environment, one to one care from a midwife, no bleeping machines, nobody waiting ready to try and suck or extract your baby out, no wonder it's bloody terrifying.

Just my opinion.

conni · 04/07/2006 13:21

Go for it. But do weigh the pros and cons of BOTH ES and vaginal delivery, also take into account that if you go for the latter you might end up with emergency section.

I gave birth vaginally, long labour, complications, foetal distress, hospital infection, episiotomy, ventouse, with the benefit of hindsight I would have preferred a well-planned i.e elective section carried out by consultant, instead I was in labour during Friday night and Saturday, junior staff, staff shortages, terrible care, mistakes, etc. Mind you I prepared well by doing active birth classes, yoga etc, but as you often hear it all turned out very differently - so go for it, you have nothing to prove, what matters is a good, non-traumatic outcome for you and your baby!!!!!!!

Spyro · 04/07/2006 13:30

Hi

my experience, first labour ended in an emergency section as baby was in distress, the labour itself was fine, epidural is a marvellous invention, I couldn't drive for 6 weeks, advice was no pushing, no pulling so couldn't even push my pram. Was soo of mums who'd had vaginal births being able to get onto the floor to change nappies etc, I couldn't even bend over to put my knickers on.

2nd baby was a planned c-section as I showed no sign of going into labour (as much as I wanted to) and couldn't be induced as had had a previous c/s - the operation itself was good, little pain, but still took a lot of recovery afterwards.

Now my scar isn't too bad, however I do have an overhang that will never go, and it took me a while to come to terms with never having "given birth"

but we are all individuals, I wanted to give birth naturally and couldn't and in someways I feel robbed of that experience

Arabica · 04/07/2006 14:07

I was pushing pram after a week and never had a problem getting dressed, so we're all different. No driving though. But that's nothing to do with C-section. I just never learned!

Highlander · 04/07/2006 14:18

arabica, you must have been really excited then when they said 'you can drive at 6 weeks'!!

Toady · 04/07/2006 14:19

Spyro just out of interest how overdue did you go?

"2nd baby was a planned c-section as I showed no sign of going into labour (as much as I wanted to) and couldn't be induced as had had a previous c/s - the operation itself was good, little pain, but still took a lot of recovery afterwards."

claraboo · 04/07/2006 16:14

I went 3 weeks over with 2 of my children. I couldn't be induced 'cos of sections.
I've never heard of babies staying in forever of their own accord. If there's nothing wrong with mother and baby they should be allowed to carry on until the baby is ready to come out. D
Doctors panic, sadly, and this leads to unecessary intervention. Inductions very often lead to em sections beacause neither the baby or the mother's body is ready for labour. What a shame, I think it's criminal. I also think it's criminal that mothers are fed such alot of crap/ scare stories.
There are so many potentially straightforward and wonderful births ruined because of unnecessary inductions. Many many babies take alot longer to cook than the average Many take a shorter time. Why is it that at 40+ 1 weeks panic sets in? My three 'late' babies were covered in vernix, plump and happy, certainly not overdue just perfectly cooked.

lusciouslynda · 04/07/2006 17:13

Normsnockers, I did say that it was only my experience!

I agree totally that elective c-s must be far more positive experience. In fact it must be very calm.

But there is no getting away from the fact that recovery is longer.

Who are the insurance companies that let you drive before 6 weeks? 2 different companies told me that I had to wait till the doctor gave the OK at the 6 week check up.

Spyro · 04/07/2006 18:00

Hi toady

I'd gone 10 days over, I'd chosen to go for elective c section at that point, as I'd gone 3 weeks over with the first, had a 3 day labour, couldn't dilate beyond 4cm, even with induction, baby went into distress and I was told I wouldn't have been able to deliver anyway as he was too big for me and lay back to back, they had an hour to get him out. he was 9lb 2oz.

With number 2 after 10 days i didn't even have a twinge and I didn't want to go through what I had with number 1, number 2 arrived safely at 9lb 9.5oz.

But given the choice and been able to I would have liked to have experienced birth the traditional way.

lapsedrunner · 04/07/2006 19:30

I would have given anything to have an elective c section....my experience was induction (3 attempts) "back" labour (very painful), epidural, forceps.....all very negative in my experience.

mrspumpkin · 04/07/2006 19:52

Boobylicious, I would address your fears with a professional rather than make a decision based solely on what you read here. I was terrified and had a long chat with my MW to allay my fears. No one would give me the elective C/s I thought I wanted and I am glad they didn't as I think i would have worried endlessly about that instead of the vaginal delivery! I did end up having an emergency CS anyway, but I felt informed and in control as I had chatted through what I was worried about before. The em CS was fine, and if I am lucky enough to get pg again I would still think about trying for VBAC even after my rather bad experience of labour.

Up to you of course, but I would suggest that choosing an elective at this stage may just swap one set of concerns for another. See if a friendly and informed MW (or the consultant) can help and THEN decide.

Take care.

mozarellamamma · 04/07/2006 19:58

hello folks

Have skimmed the thread. Must delcare that i am quite passionate about this subject in advance.

Here goes:

I believe that if you cannot have a normal vaginal birth and by that i mean absolutely no medical intervention then elective c sections are certainly a good option. Induction is just a cheap way for the medical establishment to force babies out and often traumatise mums in the process. I carried out extensive research into induction once I was over one and half weeks due and 'told' i was going to be scheduled for one. The evidence is not great - there is huge research that shows it causes stress to the unborn child - as the contractions are not natural and basically slam a baby's skull against your pelvis making it unable to draw breath and causing mothers a great deal of pain. It is also more likley that you will need other medical interventions once this process has begun plus drugs which are no good for either of you. Armed with this information I agrued for more than an hour with a consutant at my hospital and refused the induction process despite huge pressure. I had until the two weeks were up and then if my babe hadn't engaged I 'had' to go in. I did indeed have a c-section and it was the best experience - I have no time for folk who claim it's not a real birth - my partner was with us all the time, the surgical team were brilliant and my midwife second to none who brought our babe straight on to me for skin to skin and established breastfeeding straight away. It was actually magical. Yes it's painful afterwards and you need to take it easy but other women I know have had pain (just of a different kind) with a vaginal birth.

I urge any women who wants an elective to fight for it as I urge any woman who wants a natural birth to fight for that (that was my original plan but my pelvis had other ideas). I can't comment on an emergency c-section which I understand is usually upsetting because it is an emergency and handled as such.

What I will say is that induction is a con for all involved and only leaves the NHS better in terms of balancing its books. MM

LaDiDaDi · 04/07/2006 20:18

I have posted on the thread about requesting an elective section and will try not to just repeat myself here BUT...

I requested elective c-section because I knew that no one could guarantee me a normal vaginal delivery with no forceps, ventouse, episiotomy or tears and anything else (apart from elective c section)would have been unacceptable to me. My consultant agreed in principle without any fuss but in the end I had an emergency section at 32 weeks for severe pre-eclampsia.

Despite having been very ill with pre-eclampsia my recovery from the section part of it was fine in terms of pain, only really had paracetamol after 48hours. Unfortunately my wound did come apart in quite dramatic fashion after my stitch came out but this was because my bloods had gone haywire with the pre-eclampsia and I had a big blood clot behind my wound which had pushed it apart.

8 weeks on I'm fully recovered despite how sick I was at the time of delivery. I'm not put off the thought of having more children and if I do then I will still be asking for an elective section.

diddle · 05/07/2006 10:13

boobylicious - I had my son just under 2 weeks ago, I went into hospital for induction which failed. I desperately wanted to try for a natural birth, but after all the extra time waiting for baby to arrive, he was 15 days overdue and i was exhausted from the induction attempts. I chose to have a c section rather than risk having no energy for labour and needing an emergency one. But i would never have elected to have one before i got to the failed induction stage.
I think it is well worth waiting and seeing what happens, you still have the right to choose once you're in labour, it is your decision. Although the doctors may try and talk you out of it, remember that it is your body.

I could have gone on to try and have my waters broken, which would have been difficult, but i knew my energy levels would not get me through labour, and chose my section.