!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!elective c section am i just a wimp !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dressedupnowheretogo]

im thinking of going for an elective c section my feelings towards the birth are getting more and more pulled towards petrified than excited

am i being silly or would i be better off

am worried about everyting and this issue is just adding to it

sorry for being a whinge and a wimp

please help

True morning paper, but imo so is a good v birth

Only if you'll pay to have things all stiched up nice and tightly down below afterwards and A new pair of tits as well please

Saying "higher incidence" isn't helpful. How much higher? You can't make an informed decision on incomplete information.

Now I'm sounding militant, and I'm not. I didn't have the elective caesarian. I just remember how absolutely terrified I was. And how much I wanted to slap the "women have been doing it for ever" lobby.

What is fab is when women can choose section or vaginal themselves without being judged by others for their choice!

lol

Fairymum - I'm with you on this one. You should feel proud of your baby however they've arrived!!

Booby - good luck with your choice. Having a baby's a marvellous thing - enjoy it and I hope it all goes well!!

Hooray for the wishy washiness of it all

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All I have seen is someone asking a question and everyone else giving the most 'siiting on the fence' answer they can. Is this what it's all about? Is it not about giving your opinions even if they aren't liked. It seems it's ok to give opinions as long as they're mainstream,

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What is going to help her? Saying ' whatever you want is ok, baby's the most important thing etc.etc.'
That's just lots of people giving their own experiences. maybe that's what she wants and you want.

Personally, I find the thought of major abdominal surgery far more petrifying than giving birth.

Yes, labour hurts. Yes, it hurts when the head is delivered. But the pain goes away the instant the baby is born and the sense of relief is huge Probably the most amazing bit of the birth for me .

And yes, it is uncomfortable after the birth but it's not really painful (and I'm speaking as someone who's had a bad tear and a 10lb baby).

You say you're worried about everything. If you book an elective c-section are you not then likely to worry about that? "How will I feel during it? Will it be OK? Will I recover? Will it hurt afterwards? How will I look after my baby...?" There are things to worry about with either way of having a baby - no guarantees with any of them.

No one here can make your decision for you.
No one here can tell you which will be best for you.
No one here can actually help you make your mingd up at all really.

Only you can do that.

Personally, I think you'll be fine with a vaginal delivery. I swore never again after DS1 (the 10lber) yet I now have DS2 and DD. I'm a complete wimp and DD was born at home so it can't be that bad

boobylicious - your fears are understandable and it is a pity you haven't got the support of a known midwife with you in labour. Can that be arranged in your area? Often the fear of the unknown is worse than the actual event. All mothers have different experiences which although interesting, will not help you make a decision. The pro C/S will give you all the positives and so will the pro vaginal birthers.
I personally loved my labours. Yes it was sore but it was a positive pain. I would have dreaded having a C/S.
It would be a shame to have a C/S because you think all labours are horrendous. Thousands of women have great labours, no stitches and home the same day.
You really need to explore your issues with your midwife/consultant rather than opting for a C/S. It may well be though that for you that is the option that is best. Good luck.

(When I say "make your mingd up" I mean mind, Not minge.)

Pruni - well said!!! And thought your earlier bit really useful!! I'd say that the labour pain I went through was bad, but I could cope - the exhaustion was worse, but found the epidural helped me get some rest once I'd been going quite a while. C-sections aren't as bad as the midwives make out, though - and you get painkillers after for that and are likely to be driving within 4 weeks.

And good luck once again, Booby....not that I'm being wishy washy!!! Thought I was just being nice!!! Keep us posted how it all goes!!

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I wanted a c-section the moment I found out I was pregnant. I just didn't think I could give birth naturally. I didn't really get any encouragement from the MW's I saw, and when the labour ended in an emergency c-section, I didn't mind!

When I fell pregnant the 2nd time, I insisted on an elective section from the start. I got my way eventually after meeting with the consultant.

I was in loads of pain afterwards, I was discharged after 2 days, not because I had made a great recovery, but because they needed the beds. It took me 12 weeks to recover fully, but even 4 years on, my scar is still painful

Is that right - there is someone called "Grantly Dick-Read" in the world!!!!?

Think I'm going to start a new thread about naming!!!

It is a very old book but very useful. He was a man before his time.

Booby, I think it's entirely natural to fear labour, I know I did when i was pregnant with DS. And because most of us don't get to build up a relationship with a helpful midwife prior to the birth we're kind of left dangling, not knowing how we'll cope. In my case, an emergency c/s came as a blessed relief from an excruciating and protracted labour, I had no pain from the scar whatsoever, and I've got no hesitation in going for an elective with this baby. It's the least of my worries tbh! One warning though, if you want to bf. You may find, especially if you're well endowed in the boobs department, that it's hard to establish bf after a section because getting yourself and the baby into the correct position for a good latch is difficult. Don't assume it's your fault--it really isn't. Get yourself some help lined up in advance and you'll be OK. The midwives don't usually have time to do it so find a friend or bf counsellor who'll come and support you.

Boobylicious...I too am another who was scared sh**less when i was pregnant with my dd (who is now 2.6YO) and everyone you know will tell you their "horror story" lol, but to add my opinion... I have never felt such eurphoria (sp?) than when my dd was born (vaginal delivey), it is so amazing and don't think i had a easy text book labour and delivery because it was far from it, i was 28hrs, waters went first, pushing an hour and ended up with a nasty 3rd degree tear.

Now this time around (33 weeks) you may have read on our antenatal thread that i am having a elective section because of the previous tear and trauma (still have a few probs that need sorting after this one is born) and tbh i am a little sad, and go from accepting the section this time, to feeling totally pi**ed off i won't have a vaginal delivery, but i have gone with what the consultant has said she thinks is best.

Moondog hit the nail on the head, our bodies are made to give birth and going through what i did giving birth naturally to dd is the most proudist thing i think i have ever done, and i am a total wimp when it comes to pain (really!)A womans body is a amazing thing, and your body will cope and you will be totally fine.

Sorry for the wittering on lol.

I now have the words "making your minge up!" to the tune of that Bucks Fizz song going round and round in my head.

Someone should publish a book called "Making Your Minge Up: C-section or Natural Delivery, The Choice is Yours"

You don't know until you try it!! Hard work, but SUPERB. Def Euphoria.