What was second labour like if you had a tough time first time around?

[AmIGoingMad]

Hello! I have a gorgeous DS who is 2.3 yrs old. His birth was pretty hard going but all worked out well in the end. I'm currently nearly 30wks pregnant with number 2 and am starting to really panic about the birth.

If you had a tough first time, was the second any better? How did you psych yourself up for it? Obviously this little one will be coming out, I just need some help to stop freaking myself out!

1st labour 4 hours from 1st twinge to delivery - thought I would never go through labour again so painful and no gaps between contractions
2nd labour 2 hours from 1st twinge to delivery - again the pain was unbearable but consoled myself would never have to go through it again - hopefully - never did!!

I found my second birth massively healing of my first, and also my fourth birth helped me make peace with one thing that happened in my third which had bothered me a lot. If I'd hear someone describe a birth as healing when pregnant with dc1 I'd have thought them massively woo!!

Flowery - my DD1 has gone a long way to healing lots of emotional wounds from DS1. I feel I've gone woo...

Wow can't believe others feel like this - I feel a bit weird and spiritual about it really. Is that strange?

I agree Flowery and mylittlepuds. I described my births above and dd's did help me get over ds's.

I didn't know how upsetting my labour with DS1 must have been until DD1. It's so weird cos although it was still going to hell and back I felt/feel like I have developed the skills to deal with it better. Does that make sense? Am aware I sound woo.

Amazingmumof6 - just wow.

The sad thing is that some women are put off having a 2nd child because of a traumatic first birth, but going on this thread that second birth could just be the healing experience they need.

mylittlepuds thanks!

Thanks all so much for posting here! You're helping me so much and lots of others who are in similar positions to me. Really wish I'd posted this earlier in my pregnancy to be honest! My hypnobirthing book and cd arrived this week and I'm looking forward to making a start with it this weekend. Thank you!

Hi all! I'm curious if the activity level (of mother) was different with second? I haven't been as active because of my back and it scares me. I had a traumatic first delivery and I'm 8 weeks away with #2

Dd- bloody horrible labour
Ds1- nice short almost climbed out himself
Ds2- hideous

First time, bloody awful. Second time round a walk in the park. We actually only just made it to the hospital in time!

Good luck!

Amazing! Quicker, gas and air only, I'd even call it exhilarating. It made up for the bad time I had with my first (induced, forceps, 1750 ml blood loss).

I was induced this time, too, but it was a good experience. I'm no longer feeling like my perception of childbirth is defined by that first time.

Good luck.