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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Anyone interested in an 'extended' bfers support thread?

834 replies

lilysma · 01/02/2009 11:14

Not sure what I mean by 'extended' exactly - maybe it's a self defined thing?

I define myself as an 'extended' bfer because I hardly know anyone else bfing a child as old as mine (DD is 26 months) and feel the need to discuss some issues with people also doing this and wonder if anyone else does??

Anyone up for an informal support thread on this?

OP posts:
ommmward · 25/05/2009 18:39

best nickname ever, WoTmania. How are we going to survive the suspense until November???

Satsuma1 · 25/05/2009 19:26

I'm bf DS who is 15 months and still enjoying it. When he's at nursery/with GP's he feeding morning/bedtime and usually once or twice during the night.

I would like DH to be able to settle DS for bed without me though (just in case I need to be away for work). Does anyone have any experience of this?

ommmward · 25/05/2009 19:34

yes - it's quite common for a child to be quite happy to go to sleep with someone else trusted if the breast isn't there. I'd pop round to the corner shop or drive 5 mins away one evening and leave them to do bedtime, and then if the child is unhappy you can whizz home and no harm done, try again another day

maygirl · 25/05/2009 19:42

Nursing extensively here too. And we've just had to join pregnant and nursing thread

CantSleepWontSleep · 25/05/2009 22:21

Long time since I've popped onto this thread, but still feeding dd (3.3) and ds (7 months).

BT - please don't put off ttc on the grounds of wanting ds to be sleeping through the night first. Dd had been sleeping through the night for 18 months/2 yrs before ds arrived, but his arrival has resulted in dh having to sleep in her room with her ever since, as she started not sleeping through and coming down for a cuddle (she'd sometimes ask for a feed too, but I won't give in the night) again. She was clearly jealous of ds co-sleeping, but we still can't get her to sleep on her own even though ds moved into his own room over 2 months ago!

CantSleepWontSleep · 25/05/2009 22:23

Oh, and congratulations maygirl, and agree with Ommm re someone else settling.

BouncingTurtle · 25/05/2009 22:37

Oh dear, CSWS - I have a feeling that is how ds will be! TBH it is more the new job thing atm :D the rest is probably just a pipe dream!

WoTmania · 26/05/2009 07:39

ommmward thanks [preens]. I know, it's soooo exciting. I'm rereading them (for about the 5th time) at the moment, onto Path of Daggers, just to prepare myself. I hope it's good and just one book.

BT Hope he starts sleeping better soon. My boys are sleeping through the night but involves waking anytime between 4.30 and 5.30. It's exhausting.

ChairmumMiaow · 26/05/2009 09:45

We've gone backwards a long long way over the last couple of weeks. DS has both first sets of molars coming, plus he's been going to nursery (he's fine there, but hates being left), so we're just trying to respond to his needs at home as much as we can within reason. This currently means him waking up at least 3 times a night and generally coming into bed with us (we put the bedside cot back up!)

I think I need someone to tell me we're doing the right thing. DH is supportive but we both wonder what DS would do if we settled him without milk again - its been pretty easy to get him down to one feed in the past, but at the moment my instinct is that he needs his nighttime cuddles for security. We were doing so 'well' before and I just got used to all that sleep!

MaryAnnSailors · 26/05/2009 12:53

Hello
Wondering if this is the best place to post this? It's a bit of a long shot.

I have a 16 month ds and we're planning on going on a short break to Patera beach in Turkey next month. It's not a resorty type place, very local and villagey with a big old stretch of deserted beach.

Just wondering if anyone knows how extended breastfeeding is thought of over there? I wouldn't want to offend the locals, but likewise don't want to have to go to our room each time if it isn't necessary.

Any thoughts?

elvislives · 26/05/2009 19:50

Chairmum mine had a couple of weeks of suddenly waking several times a night a month or so ago. It was big teeth coming through. Her little friends at swimming who have been sleeping through for months also started waking several times.

We are back to sleeping through most nights, despite a BF at every waking.

picklemumma · 26/05/2009 23:46

Can I join in? Am greatly relieved to have found your thread. Am still Bf DS at 18months and similar to many others here have recently gone from morning and evening feeds (and night time back to sleepies) to having the little fella attached to me like a little monkey at every opportunity. Was starting to get concerned, but am reassured by your experiences. However, could do with some sense of it being at least partly up to me whether we have a feed, in the middle of the street, for instance, as he cares not where we are. Gets really stoppy and throws himself about if I don't agree. Is also a terrible twiddler but am attempting to divert this by holding his hand or giving him a toy to hold (though have been doing this for last 6 months to absolutley no effect).Good luck to us all!

WoTmania · 27/05/2009 08:45

Pickle - DS2 is very demanding so I've started telling him 'yes, later'. Sometimes helps as the yes bit appeases him and the later means I don't have to feed there and then.

Original poster
lilysma · 27/05/2009 20:12

Hi everyone, I started this thread ages ago and then couldn't keep up with the messages so sort of got out of the loop.

Anyway, just to second those who say settling without bm is possible. DD is 2.5 and an avid bfer (I'm talking all day every day if she's with me and at home) but is usually happy to go to sleep cuddling DH if I go out. Well, perhaps not exactly happy as she would rather i was there every second ('no go out mummy!'), and she does sometimes cry when i go, but apparently she's usually fine when i'm gone. She doesn't always bf to sleep any more though, even though she does have an evening feed (or five ) iyswim.

I was wondering if any of you have left your DC overnight or for more than one night? I work in a job where I am supposed to travel quite a bit and have managed to get out of it mainly so far or have taken DD with me (with my mum as carer). I won't always be able to do this though and DH is keen to start getting her used to me going away with a night or two at the weekend. I don't really want to stop bf and am in a bit of a state about it all, worrying that she'll be distraught etc. Has anyone left a DC overnight or more whilst still bf without too much pain on both sides? Or is this a pipe dream?

OP posts:
whomovedmychocolate · 27/05/2009 20:24

MaryAnnSailors - IME of Turkey I wouldn't if I were you. Sorry

Well an update from me too then, DS is now ten months still feeding, DD is 2.7 months and has missed three days (not altogether but just spontaneously not asked for it on three separate days). As long as I'm not actually upstairs and am dressed when she wakes up she seems less likely to ask for it.

We've talked about when she's three she'll be a big girl and perhaps have a present instead of nursing (frankly I don't have the time in the morning for her lazy arse hour long nursing sessions ).

Original poster
lilysma · 27/05/2009 20:26

I know what you mean about the lazy arse morning sessions, but on the other hand i don't have to get up

OP posts:
whomovedmychocolate · 27/05/2009 20:29

Yeah, well I have a 10 month old who has just learned to vault out of his cot and run across the room towards the stairs/cat/hot cup of tea so I do

Original poster
lilysma · 27/05/2009 20:33

my sympathies are with you!

OP posts:
maygirl · 27/05/2009 21:41

Hi Lilysma,

I had to leave my DS FOR 2 nights when he was 27 mths to be with my mum for a serious operation, and on a more fun note, 2 nights when he was 29mths for a hen weekend. He normally feeds 3-5+ times per day and at night if he wakes, but he was totally fine. He woke once in the night & DH showed him I wasn't in bed, and he went back to his own bed happily... (I should hide when I am here to night-wean him really!).

I expressed on waking up, my most milky time, and in the evenings the first time, but not the second as was a bit drunk tipsy when got home! Couldn't get much out with the pump, not used to expressing anymore, but enough to be comfy.

Like your DD he sometimes crys when I go out and asks me not to go, but is fine within a few minutes and settles for DH at bedtime. He really was fine for 2 days/nights mummy and BF free, and soon ramped the milk production back up!

FairyLightsForever · 27/05/2009 22:08

Hello everyone
Hope you are all doing well.
We have moved house this weekend, which has stressed DD (2) quite badly. XP has informed me that he thinks now is the time to stop feeding her. I am astounded by the stupidity of the man and by how sulky he got when I informed him that this is exactly the wrong time to be weaning
Thankfully, due to the extra feeds and lots of reassurance she's a wee bit calmer today.

FairyLightsForever · 27/05/2009 22:13

Mawbroon, I'm still on the same email address and mobile number and have moved to B*stone, so more or less round the corner from you now

MaryAnnSailors · 27/05/2009 23:29

thanks for the answer whomovedmychocolate... that's a shame, ah vell

mawbroon · 27/05/2009 23:37

Fairy lights - OK, will drop you a text next week. We are away over the weekend.

CantSleepWontSleep · 28/05/2009 09:09

I've left dd for a couple of nights for a hen weekend, and for 5 nights when I was in hospital being induced with ds (he didn't want to come out!), although I did see her sometimes during the day if she came in to visit. She was fine.

Original poster
lilysma · 28/05/2009 09:42

Thanks for the reassurance, cantsleep and maygirl. I guess I have an over-inflated sense of my own importance . DD is a real mummy's girl and DH is hoping that she will bond with him more if I get out of the way

OP posts:
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