Anyone else prepared to admit that they didn't b/f just because they didn't want to ??

[IllegallyBrunette]

Just wondered really.

I have 3 dc and didn't breast feed any. I was 19 when I had dd1 and was asked by a midwife if i'd be breastfeeding and I said no. There was no argument or discussion, that was that.

When I had dd2 at 34 weeks she had to be tube fed. I offered to express milk for her but was told i needn't bother.

With ds, again I didn't want to but even if I had it would have been hard as he was supposed to be on phototherapy 24/7 for a week.

I think the attitude towards ff mums on this forum by some bf mums is disgusting. I would never dream of saying anything against any mum for feeding her baby by whichever way she chooses, yet some of the comments on here like 'formula should only be available if there is a proven medical need' are just awful.

What an awful and misinformed post roxy
and FWIW there is no such thing as a "ff caused health problem"

"makes me laugh" yes it sounds so fucking hilarious that your close family all have diseases

nasty nasty piece of work

sorry to go on but you have made me

Roxy25 - you have just undone ALOT of the hard work done by some of the pro BF women here, people who genuinly DO want to spead the message of the benefits of BF rather then judge FF.

Well done you, I hope you are very pleaseed with yourself.

I also think its just lovely you will sit on your stool of self ritchouness and 'laugh' about the health issues of your nephews. What a gen of an aunt you are.

Really, who is the biggest arse here - the woman who gave formula or the one spending her time gloating on the internet that her children now have serious health issues? Have a think about it.

You make me sick.

what a disgusting post Roxy

i feel a bit wierd about breast feeding (my own embarassment issues really, i dont have any problem with other people doing it or seeing people do it in public) BUT i want DD to have the benefits so i think im going to try expressing, who knows, i might end up BF but with the mind set i have now i think expressing (although a bit of a pain with the bottles etc) will be best for me and baby :)

Rachy - I think it also depends how 'good' you both get a BF.

I was AWFUL! Needed pillows, had to sit in a certain position, had to sit there braless and topless, shuffle into a suitable position, have alf passed to me and then SHOVE him on as he was, apparently, a 'nipple clamper' (midwifes words, not mine!) :o

This does not lend itself to a discrete feed in the corner of starbucks!! But I also have friends who found it very easy and lieterraly, noone knew that they were feeding when we were out and about. Loose top, nursing bar + hungery baby and they were away!

thanks for the advice guys :)

sparklystockings im going to ask the midwife about it, my antenatal class does a bf session but i think itll take more than that for me!

toddlerwrangler i dont know what it is about bf (because i REALLY dont object to others doing it) its more of a personal embarassment i think i suppose im just really self concious when it comes to me doing it and even get embarassed when peole ask if im going to

i dont know what i can do to get over it but as long as DD gets the full benefits and OH helps with washing the bottles atm expressing seems like the best option. im going to wait and see though, i might love bf when it comes to it!
im not to bothered about missing out on the 'physical bond' everyone talks about as being a benefit as surely your just as close with a bottle? they just dont have your boob in their mouth!

thanks for the advice :) btw 'nipple clamper'?! sounds painful! haha

Roxy -where you ff? Sounds like your ff caused problem is lack of brain cells.

were

Rachy - just do as you feel comfortable :) I never got on with BF, but even if I had I suspect I too would never have fed out and about.

And yes - the nipple clamping wasnt nice! Another vote in favour of bottles in my book!

thanks TW :) a lot of my family havent got on with it either but im willing to give it a try at least!
sure ill be on again worrying about it and even more when she actualy comes!!

It makes you laugh that your nephews are ill, Roxy?

You sound like a nice person.

nice post roxy!

FWIW I have asthma and excema and DH has neither. Guess which of us was FF and which BF???

In answer to the OP
Yes, I chose to FF both of mine (now 22 and 20). IMO (and I appreciate few on here will share it) The one HUGE advantage to FF is that someone else (ie DH) can do it without all the faff of expressing. Also For me FF kept me sane - the babies went longer between feeds, slept through the night for twelve hours from about 10 weeks old. As I was on my own a lot of the time (all family hundreds of miles away and DH doing 14 hour days at the time and only around at weekends) I did not have the support I hear many refer to on here (get others to make the meals look after the hosue while you feed feed feed) so my way of coping was to have my babies in a routine and ensure I got some "me time" to do such things as the washing, ironing, cooking etc. And to hand the baby m over to DH for an afternnon or so at the weekend. My personal opinion is that while FF is not as nutritionally perfect as BF it is in the 21st century a very good alternative in first world countries.

Not intending to be controversial but just wanted to point out that FFing does not necessarily = routine/sleep etc. My DS1, EBF, went 7-7 from 3 months and 4 hours beween feeds from 2 months. He is an easy and accomodating 6YO now. DS2 is quite the opposite, having slept a max of 4 hours in a row, ever (also EBF).

Just wanted to clarify this.

F DOES of course take longer to digest though so often babies WILL go longer between feeds but it's not to be relied on.

As an EBFing mum I do agree that having someone to share the feeds can be really helpful. But I couldn't imagine night feeds with formula. I just latch and go back to sleep :)

You're right, of course, amother, that BFing is much, much easier with support.

What a nice post from someone who knows the facts and has come to an informed decision, and the right one for you :)

I breastfed my 1st baby for 3 weeks.I stopped when due to painful nipples.I found formula feeding much easier and more convenient and my son was very healthy.
As a result I formula fed my other 2 babies straight from birth.
I never felt guilty about this for a single second. No one ever expressed any negativity towards me for formula feeding [or indeed for breast feeding during my brief experience].
I have known both breastfeeding and formula feeding Mums and it doesn't seem to be an issue in real life.

Roxy, not only do you sound utterly vile, you are also deluded, as no consultant would ever say that. You don't sound right in the head to be honest!

Can't be bothered to read the whole thread. Usual defensive crap that goes against the scientific evidence.Your choice as a parent but don't talk crap...

I think it's interesting that FF mums feel 'got at' somehow when IME it is BFing mums who face all the difficulty and predjudice.

Yes the health professionals may be supportive to Bfing but in general society is not. Especially in comparison to other countries such as Sweden or Turkey for instance. FF mums don't have people giving them dirty looks, or complaints about feeding baby in public or other mums rolling their eyes when you tell them you are extending bfing past 6 months. There is still a long way to go before BFing is seen as generally acceptable.

It IS a choice for some women to FF, some can't BF for whatever reason but there is a little bit of me, I must admit feels it's a bit of a shame when women don't even try to BF, knowing all the benefits that it can bring to your baby.

Hmmm just noticed how old the thread was, wish I hadn't posted now. Same old arguments getting rehashed.

fifitot, I think it's the whole grass is greener thing.
I tried to BF but couldn't for various reasons and maybe it's all in my own head but I see the looks when I get the bottle out in public, the tuts and sighs from women who clearly think I should be BF'ing.
I've had to defend myself to more than one check out lady when buying formula and I've also felt the need to justify my baby being FF to my NCT friends who have successfully established BF'ing.

Like I said, it may all be in my own head but I believe both FF'ers and BF'ers face prejudices.

ps. I am able to admit this now that I have been through it but I used to be a bit judgeypants when I saw FF'ing mothers - wondering why they would "make that choice". Now I know it's not always a choice and anyway, even if it was a choice, it's theirs to make and I can't sit in judgement anymore.