why would anyone CHOOSE not to bf? if they know its the best thing for the baby?

[milkgoddessmakesthefinestmilk]

this totally baffles me, , i truely cannot understand it.

i can understand it, if you try and find it too difficult, and decide its not working out for you.
but i honestly can not understand why a mother would not even want to.
surely every mum only wants the best for their baby?

is it because they do not understand the risks of giving formula?

OP isnt looking for any level of discussion she is looking for a scrap as usual. i find her threads discouraging,divisive,provocative for no apparent purpose other than to upset.maybe this is indicative of deep rooted insecurities and her insecure ego

the responses she has received have been pretty unanimous YABU response

And your insulting, name-calling responses are superior to the OP... in what way, exactly?

Actually, hatrick raises a very good point. Given the number of +100 plus message active conversations that there've been on this subject (apart from this one), if the OP was genuinely interested in understanding, she'd have read through those very detailed threads, rather than positing a faux-naive question as her opening post.

cest, if we all searched the archive for answers before posting, there would be very few active convos. And how do you know that her naivete is false?

i am not purposefully setting out to upset or be provocative to mums en masse that is the difference. however i am specifically addressing my comments about the OP yes, because thta is the nature of resonding to a discussion board and contentious point

Well, your assumption that the OP is 'setting out to be provocative and upset mums en masse' is just that - an assumption. FWIW, from what I've seen of your posts, you are frequently deliberately provocative.

Of course a discussion board is a place to disagree. However, I don't think it's a place in which to speculate distastefully on another poster's state of mind, or to hurl random insults because someone has the temerity to disagree with you.

How do you know her purpose is to upset and provoke?

Because you FEEL upset and provoked when you read them?

Is your response proof of her intention?

Wow milk goddess whats the weather like up there on that pedestal?

go read other posters responses eg Hunker, PinkTulips et al they find OP unreasonable too. i have never started a BF/FF post fwiw

I don't need to read other posters' opinions to know what I think. But thanks for the tip.

Pol, genuinely there have been two +200 thread conversations on this in active conversation during the time she posted it. And seriously, when I was looking for advice on DD's sleeping, the first thing I did was look at the Sleep threads to see if similar things had come up. Active conversations, to me, seems to be about topics either not covered at all, not covered recently, or not covered in depth (not true in this case).

I think her naivete is false because if she'd had a real interest in understanding then she would have at least scanned those other threads and her post would have been much more likely to start along the lines of "Although I've read the reasons given, I still don't understand...."

policywonk oh i am flattered that you are an ardent follower of my posts funny cos i cant recall any of yours

cest, that probably is what people should do, but the truth is that a lot us us (including me) don't search archives before posting, unless the problem/question is very specialised. Partly because the search function is shite, partly because reading through all the search results takes aaaages, and partly because people like to interact in real time.

not read the whole of the thread but i often hear people saying it's not for me (how do you know if you don't try), and i can't be bothered (ff for me was a lot more faff) along with people who don't want to do it cos they are on certain medication or because they were abused.

I choose not to breast feed after dd1 after 3 weeks of absolute agony. I would sit trying fed dd1 in tears for hours slowly getting more stressed and falling into PND until my DH put his foot down and gave dd1 a bottle.

With dd2 i breast fed her for 3 days but my milk never came in.

As for knowing what best for my babies was food if that came from a bottle then so be it.

sm - thank goodness. I'll do my best to keep it that way.

hit the nail on the head, we know our own babies best

Policywonk - smashing incognito it is then

lizziemun i know how you feel - my milk didn't come in properly until day 7 or 8, so ds was constantly feeding until it did.

Nobody's putting anyone on a pedestal - for the record I think the post was a bit ill-timed given some of the other threads currently running on the board.

I'm just a bit aghast at all the hand-wringing and 'how very dare you's'.

By the way, I don't see any inferences to how much mothers love or don't love their babies in the OP.

All mums love their babies to distraction - include those mums who make very poor choices for them, like those mums who smoke and drink during their pregancies and who smoke around their children when they're born.

PW just because she's a SAHM doesn't mean you have to defend her horrid posts.

because of all the pretty bottles available of course

so they can go to an MN meetup and get utterly rat-arsed.

to resume their drug habit.

to go back to WORK!