Did you choose to bottle feed and why?

[Alexandersmummy]

I am currently 40 wks + 5 days and want to bottle feed, as I did with my first but feel under increasing pressure to breast feed from midwife. I was just wondering if you bottle fed did you feel this pressure and how did you cope?
I know all the good reasons to breast feed but it's not for me, I feel uncomfy with it.
I'd really appreciate any comments!

Isn't formula similar to ronseal?
Says it on the tin

FFORBF, you are not, are you, saying that women should not get antenatal info on breastfeeding, because it is unfair to formula feeders?

Thanks, Tutter, BTW

Have i once said that i think the info given to BF mothers is to much?
And i totally agree with you that it is right to prepare mothers and DH's on this subject. This is not my point - all i am trying to say is that I feel that more info should be more freely available to FF mothers aswell. We do not all have the luxury of a good base of knowledge, some people need to know how to do it, for DH's aswell as mums.
I am not deliberately trying to wind anybody up and nor have i said that your, Tiktok, views are wrong. I am just putting forward another angle of view, please do not shoot me down for having an opinion.
I would also like to add for anyone who is reading this, please if you are FF ask for the info if you need it, do not feel that you wont be given anything. You will and should get the same level of respect and support

FFORBF : I am not shooting you down, or objecting to you having an opinion. I am challenging you - something that happens on a talkboard. You are also challenging me, too - fair enough!

Please confirm for me that when you said you were not allowed to share information with FF women or talk about FF you were incorrect, and I was right not to believe you.

You do seem to be retracting it, as you now encourage ff women not to worry - "please if you are FF ask for the info if you need it, do not feel that you wont be given anything. You will and should get the same level of respect and support "

You ask where you have said you did not think bf women need info - I challenged you on this because you raised the issue of bf women getting information antenatally as a justification for ff women getting the same thing. Seemed to me you thought all women should get the same level of info antenatally - and were resentful of bf women getting something ff women didn't.

There should be much more information available wrt formula feeding, that tells people exactly what is in them and what the differences are between ffing and bfing, this is probably a large art of the reason there seems not to be as much info on FFing, because the manufacturers don't want it.

A lot of the info on breastfeeding is what it does, why it's better, what mum and baby get out of it, what's in it, etc etc, not just how to do it, in fact how to do it is probably the area the information lacks in, if the only info on FF is going to be 'put powder in bottle of water' (which is what the manufacturers want) then in comparison it will seem like a lot less than what bfing mothers get.

Agreed, Squalor....there really is a pitiful amount of info on ff out there, but this is not what most people mean about info. In fact, they would rather people had less info about the health facts.....because that is seen as criticising.

I am not retracting anything and no i will not confirm that what i earlier said was a lie. During a study session i asked if a women at 36 weeks told me she wanted to FF could i discuss it futher i was informed that i should only be advising about BF and its benefits. Now whether you believe me or not is you rchoice, you are twisting my words and hearing them how you wish to hear them. I may have been told not to advise about it antenattaly but i have never said people can not ask for info or that it won't be given. I f any one asks me for info whether its FF or BF I will do what i can to answer any queries.
Why is it not necessary for FF to be told before the birth of their child how to sterilise and prepare a bottle?

I am not saying the FF mothers need the same amount of info antenatally but the basics i believe are necessary.

I know this is drifting a bit from what is being discussed but quite a lot, not all of course, of issues with breastfeeding stem from such deep personal issues that it becomes difficult to tackle right at the time when a woman has just given birth.
pregnancy birth and parenthood awaken so many emotions and memories that I feel the services are ill equipped to deal with.

breastfeeding is for me the natural way to go, what our bodies are designed to do, and it is a deeply emotional / physical experience.
sometimes dealing with the 'mechanics' of it is falling very short of what is really needed.

Good point sfxmum, whereas formula feeding is less often entwined with these issues so maybe not needed antenatally as much as postnatally.

Puppymonkey - it's a bit ironic that you are here complaining that breastfeeders are posting on a forumula thread yet you felt okay to post on the ex bf thread views against it.

Look - every tin of formula has instructions on the side.

And the 0 - 5 book that all mothers are given during their pregnancy contains instructions on how to make up a bottlefeed.

Plus - midwives and health visitors show mothers how to make up bottles on a one to one basis.

What more can you ask for?

I agree. I knew how to bottlefeed, sterilise etc from a baby book I had even though I didnt need to know.- read it out of boredom.

plus on discharge from hospital you are usually given instructions on how to make up a feed safely and correctly

Mind you I was sent home from hospital with ds (now 12) with bf not having been established (due to crap advice - apparently as he was a big baby he needed formula as a top up and I believed them as knew no better), and no bottles at home or equipment. I had to send dh to the hospital in teh middle of the night to get those little prepared bottle things as I had no way of feeding him.

WIth dd (4) they still tried to get me to bottlefeed and refused to help me bf as I refused to give her a bottle. Crap, crap and crap again.

well,i think that there isnt enough info on formula around.i think tins of formula should have public health warnings on them like fags do such as 'formula contains,amongst other things,fish eyes....blah blah blah'.im not joking.

personally,i was given ready made bottles for the first few feeds after having my 4 ff from birth babies,then i was taken to the kitchen and shown how to use the steriliser,make up feeds etc etc(well,i was with dd1 and ds2,i declined the offer with dd2 and3).

i wish somebody had explored my reasons for not wanting to bf with me while i was pregnant,then i may well have changed my mind.

'i dont feel comfy with it' is not a reason.what if somebody is uncomfortable with bf because they dont feel they can do it in public because its still not commonplace in britain?that wouldnt be the mothers personal,informed,choice.it would be the mother being heavily influenced by what is socially acceptable.

if more women bf,then more women will want to.women may think they are choosing to ff,but how much are they being influenced by fashion,advertising,or society's view of women,breasts,and sexuality?
that is not an informed choice IMO.

I was told I was "spectacularly missing the point" (ooh thanks!) when I commented on lack of response to other threads actually asking for bf help... cos they all get resolved quickly...

Just thought I'd point out that having read through some of them, they don't look like they're resolved at all to me.

... esp the lady who mentions about the let down thingy.

Right, I'm off out for me tea now. Ta ta...

Sorry to reactivate this thread but felt I really had to say to becka that I think it is very much not on to use your status as a health professional (who has published 50+ papers no less!) to support your personal anecdotal views.

I think that hcps should be very careful to distinguish when they are speaking with special authority derived from reading/prof experience and when they are just giving a personal view. It has been my experience that a lot of hcps do use their personal experience inappropriately and it can be very misleading

FFORBF:

"Why is it not necessary for FF to be told before the birth of their child how to sterilise and prepare a bottle?"

Because most women want to breastfeed, so the precious contact time they have with their HCPs should be spent talking about that. It often isn't, granted, but if there's time to talk about feeding, it should be bf that's discussed, unless the woman is very specifically not even going to consider it, I guess. And even then, there's a case to be made for exploring her reasons for not considering it, sensitively, for sure.

FFORBF, when would you suggest women are told about how to sterilise and make up a bottle? How far into their pregnancy?

And you say you believe that even breastfeeding mums should be told how to sterilise a bottle - why?

Puppymonkey - you suggested that posts asking for bf help were ignored in comparison with this very busy thread....I said one reason for this is that bf posts asking for help might be resolved, and do not need 13 pages to deal with. It would be unlikely for all bf requests for help to be resolved with a talkboard (as if!)...and your search for an 'unresolved' question to show you are not missing the point is just silly. Do you really think all requests for bf help would be appropriately dealt with only if they have 13 pages of responses?

Tiktok, people always do this on threads like this, don't they?

If you post about formula advertising, you get told it doesn't matter, nobody pays any attention to formula advertising () and "What about trying to get better bf support in RL?" - as if you've got no ability to multitask and can only have one focus forever.

FFORBF, I will explain again. Earlier today you said you were not allowed to give information about formula feeding to ff women . Later you said this was something told to you by a single HP. Later still you said no one needs worry - if they are ff and need info, they will get it. And still later, you say you experienced one situation where a woman at 36 weeks pregnant asked for information about formula feeding, and you were told only to advise about breastfeeding and its benefits.

You are confused, and so am I now. There is nothing to stop you explaining about the health risks of formula feeding to this woman, and telling her the full story, listening to her reasons for not breastfeeding, and ensuring she had your full support, whatever her choice. What else would she want to know at 36 weeks? It would be daft to demo making up a bottle - a waste of time and an ineffective moment to teach her. As long as you were happy she was aware of the health effects of any feeding choice, you can discuss what equipment she might need to buy and so on...where's the problem?

tik

no of course i wouldn't expect 13 pages of response to a request for bf help...

same for a request with ff help actually... which this post was just to remind u...

it's only 13 pages cos u lot keep chating to yourself about how wonderful bf is, and how wonderful u all think eachother are!!

cue another 50 responses... please no!!!!

Tip for PuppyMonkey: if you are bored by this thread, there are many zillions of others on mumsnet. Must be exhausting for you if you feel a compulsion to read, and cntribute to, a thread you think is a waste of time.