Want to exclusively FF

[justpoppingintosayhello]

I'm being made to feel inferior because I want to formula feed my baby, how do I carry on with this? I'm being made to feel bad because of my choices.

So apologies to "Mainly" I take back saying you are unkind and opinionated but that your posts came across in that way. I am sure you are trying your best as the rest of us Mainly.

HA! Tiktok you rebel!

Just play by the rules Links

I have never said FFeeding mothers are bad mothers.

I have said FFeeding mothers have been undermined by the power of Formula companies and do. Or know all
Of the risks associated with Formula.

I have said never trying to breastfeed once is poor (unless there is a serious medical issue at birth) I will stand by that. People that tried their best at the beginning but didn't get the support they needed and then turned to Formula tried at least. But it is hard work, it took 17 weeks for me with tongue tie and a rubbish patch but I was determined and appreciate that is not the norm. I don't expect everyone to try that hard but I think trying is important.

I just felt that the OP should try to breastfeed just once. That is a perfectly reasonable opinion to have. People can put words into my mouth but I still dislike the stuff unless it is in a medical context. Some people here can't bear that I have a different opinion to them!

"I think it is a travesty that a baby won't get even one tiny attempt of breastmilk"

If I had actually contemplated BF, hearing this kind of tragic blurb would have put me off ten fold.

Dear oh dear.

Fuck me, if you think that's a travesty you've led a very blinkered existence.

Dear oh dear....

You really think it's ok for a baby to never get a drop Of breastmilk?

Is this for real ??!!

Of course it's ok!! Ideal? Probably not. But far more horrific things happen to most people in their lifetime.

mainly you must be aware that around 1/5th of mothers start with formula and don't do any breastfeeding, which if you consider the number of births yearly must be quite a lot of women. It's not a travesty. It's not what the NHS would prefer, but it's not a travesty.

I absolutely do.

My dd didn't

I like the Op, chose not to and dd couldn't literally be healthier. She's amazing. Formula is amazing stuff IMO.

A close friend is a Pediatrician and she is literally the only person who ticked me off a little. I'm sure my DM frowned upon the Aptamil from birth but proof is in the pudding hey.

A travesty this is not.

And yes I'm 'for real'

Actually had our only dc quite late in life and took a whole 18 months off maternity....
Guess that makes it more of a 'travesty'

We exist and we adore our DC I suggest you try to process that....somehow.

I don't think it's worth letting other people's opinions and judgements upset you OP.

I tried to BF but I failed and DD had formula from day 2. She is very healthy, never ill, rather bright, sleeps well and has no allergies. I don't regret formula feeding.

"I just felt that the OP should try to breastfeed just once. That is a perfectly reasonable opinion to have. People can put words into my mouth but I still dislike the stuff unless it is in a medical context. Some people here can't bear that I have a different opinion to them!'

lol. You are quite funny . As I said if you feel that strongly about infant feeding there is a wealth of excellent research about social, political, cultural and economic factors that influence infant feeding practices. But your posts indicate that you aren't very aware of the wider issues around infant feeding, which massively discredits your expressed and frank opinions on this thread .

Now Mainly tell me what you think about women:

• who have been sexually abused and who feel that because of their experience BF is not for them?
• Very young mothers whose social group (partner, peers, family) have a long standing culture of feeding formula. BF in this context would result in the new mother to be openly criticised made to feel embarrassed and even ostracised?

• women with abusive partners or family who would put themselves in an even more vulnerable position if they BF?

• women who have had a very difficult time trying to BF the first time which made their PND worse or even triggered it and who decide that it is best for their mental health to ff so that they are well and happy to look after their second baby.

and so on and so forth. Mainly you come across as if you are unable to put yourself in other omen's shoes and as if you lack in empathy. I'm sure you mean well but sadly it really doesn't come crass that way.

*Women's shoes

Links agree
However,

I would like to point out that I and actually others I know, are polar opposites of those categories and have still chosen to FF....

Just Saying
Perhaps with us the greatest 'Travesty' sits.

*You really think it's ok for a baby to never get a drop Of breastmilk?

Is this for real ??!!*

Yes, this is ok. I am living proof that this is ok. My DS is living proof that this is ok .

I know Only Of course travesty doesn't sit with you. . I tried to think of the more extreme examples in the hope that mainly would be able to see things in a slightly more nuanced way

I tore myself to bits over this. Felt awful
He is now six, you could line his whole class up and I honestly couldn't tell you who was ff or bf. It makes 0 difference. I just gave the first milk (the stuff thats supposed to be mega good for them) to my second son, so bf him for a week then straight on to ff and he's fine.

I know Links....I'm happy to be an informed Maverick

Still very dubious that OP never came back....

Hhhhhmmmmm

I formula fed from day one.

Had no desire to breast feed.

Do I give a shiny shite what anybody thinks?
Nope

Do I feel guilty?
Nope

It was the right decision for us.

Yes breastfeeding is nutritionally better, but it's not the be all and end all.

Try taking a leaf out of my book, your body, your business.

wispagold- I was exactly the same. Never wanted to bf so ff from the start.
I'm proud of my decision and stand by it no matter what. I will also do the same with my next baby

I BF my first and FF my second. Any more kids I have will be FF. I found it so much easier FF, and it helped me bond with my DS. I struggled with BF, my DD constantly cried with hunger and I ended up getting PND as a result. You have to do whatever is best for your mental health too. People will make you feel like shit but that's because some people ARE shits. Fuck 'em.

Quite frankly, I think anybody who is as bothered as some people on this thread, need to concentrate more on their own lives and kids.

I'm with Mainly - totally unacceptable in my book to not have a go at BF (bar genuine medical reasons)

Links - I don't see how your examples preclude trying to BF. Unless you give it a go, how can you know how you're going to feel? Once you become a mother, it's your babies needs first and foremost.