Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Flip

1 2 ··· 6 7 8 9 10 11

Original poster

Do you enjoy bottlefeeding? Am I alone?

273 replies

peaches27 · 18/04/2006 23:00

I have always felt a little put off by people who are so overenthusiastic about breastfeeding that I just cannot fathom them out. All I can remember are the cracked, sore nips, feeding for hours on end, leaking milk and generally feeling that my life was not my own. Where was the "almost orgasmic sensation at let down"? I dont think I even remember feeling a sensation, apart from dread at approaching the carrycot. When I tearfully gave up the struggle and gave DS a bottle it was love at first sight for both of us. Finally he was satisfied and full. Finally I was comfortable and got my life back. As I am typing this I can almost feel the righteous indignation of the breastfeeders.

Can you please accept that it is not the same wonderful experience for everyone and if we want to give up because we hate it we shouldnt be made to feel guilty as several generations have grown up perfectly healthily on formula. (Breastfeeders now search for statistics which prove that breastfed people are healthier).

I am writing this and viewing the subject with a very long perspective. I last breastfed in 1982. It was very fashionable then and I felt a failure when it didnt work and I didnt feel the same as the people in the pregnancy books or the NCT/LLL leaflet. (BTW in those days I didnt live in a posh enough part of the city to access NCT/LLL). This feeling of failure was compensated by the happy healthy infant who thrived on formula and also the extra free time I had even after preparing feeds!

I am raising my grandkids and obviously my DGD has formula just like her mummy did. I love giving her those bottles, especially the night ones when its just the two of us. She is happy too.

Anyone else share this experience?

OP posts:

bitsamaloney · 19/04/2006 18:01

i havent seen anyone say "formula feeders are thick" at all or any other directly personal insults. i have seen breastfeeders called smug and nazis and all sorts of other personal insults though.

and for the record i dont give a stuff how other people feed their baby and expect others to respect those who have chosen differently.

MissChief · 19/04/2006 18:18

in a quiet moment in between interminable bfing sessions -see it does take longer - I've re-read Peaches original message and I can honestly see nothing inflammatory in it. It's her opinion, isn't it? Views to disagree with, of course, but inflammatory? Ridiculous..

harpsichordcarrier · 19/04/2006 18:47

Tatties you are RIGHT someone did say something indirectly negative about formula feeding on the otehr thread and The Breastfeeders SWOOPED to say it was unacceptable.
because it is NOT us and them

and peaches you are having a LARf right - a National Bf Polocy is too extreme?
If you choose to formula feed, good for you
If you formula feed/fed and you are happy about it, good for you.
But if you really think that there is enough support for mothers to bf, then for one thing you haven't spent enough time on MN . Yes, I would like to see bf rates go up in this country, for lots of reasons, including public health reasons. I would like any woman who wants to bf to be given every support. And I would like the culture to change to make bf easier and more accepted. And a National BF Policy is one way of making that happen.
and if you really want to feel sniped at and unsupported in RL and on MN you should try extended breastfeeding. Which is, I'll have you know, "gross", "digusting" and "child abuse." Normsknockers, it will have you longing for indirect derogatory comments.

hunkermunker · 19/04/2006 18:47

Squarer, do you really think I swipe at ffeeding?

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:47

tiktok, you don't.

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 18:48

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:48

hunker, you don't.

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 18:49

And me, and me!!

harpsichordcarrier · 19/04/2006 18:49

I personally think the "happy mum, happy baby" thing is a bit trite and a bit of a cop out as it happens.
what makes me happy does not necessarily make my baby happy and I can't imagine why anyone would think it would.

harpsichordcarrier · 19/04/2006 18:50

pruni I ain't asking about me
I try not too

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:51

HC, you don't

(I'm never accusing you of that again!! I still feel bad!)

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 18:52

I often think that

If happy mum = happy babies then sod cooking tonight - and sod reading Oakey the fkn Rabbit again too - mine's a big fat spliff and a bottle of Baileys

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:52

Oh god I am going to have to go through every bloody non-bottle-feeder on this thread!
You don't!!!
Usually...
I'll be watching you all now!

hunkermunker · 19/04/2006 18:53

Do you know, I try really hard with posts on this subject, really hard. I have people in my life, people I love dearly, who ffeed and I don't think less of them or anyone else for doing it.

Bfeeding is the only part of my parenting I'm confident about - there are so many things I do that are not good enough and I beat myself up about them regularly.

But since I can't post without taking sweary swipes, it would seem, I'll just say arse to it

And HC, agree with you re the extended thing - that's just "pervy"

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 18:53

I want you to say me, specifically.

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:54

happy mum, happy baby is overused and a bit meaningless

But as Normsnockers said, a happy mum is an asset to a baby, and that is true.

THere are depths to be sunk to in the whole feeding thing that are not healthy.

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:55

Greensleeves, you don't

Feeling better?

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 18:55

Much

Pruni · 19/04/2006 18:56

Hunker I think you do do brilliantly.
I came on MN over a year ago and almost immediately got involved in some upsetting threads on this topic, and I still remember some of the things you said which really helped.

hunkermunker · 19/04/2006 18:58

Oh bless you Pruni - I wasn't asking for you all to say I was lovely (much) but if you want to, of course that's fine

I edit and edit and edit posts in this topic.

And as for happy mum, happy baby - I'd be happier if mine was asleep atm, so I could type with both hands...can I drug him?

Greensleeves · 19/04/2006 19:02

HM you are the Norkmeister General

Tinker · 19/04/2006 19:03

Bleedin' hell, I bottlefed and breastfed/feed so I can swear and misuse apostrophes. As tiktok has said, my comment was in response, hardly expected it to be taken seriously. Jeeze.

bourneville · 19/04/2006 19:06

But, most mums wouldn't be happy if they did stuff like sod reading that book again, sod cooking dinner etc . But if a mum is depressed, resentful, in pain etc etc b'feeding then happy mum=happy baby is a relevant phrase to use.

snafu · 19/04/2006 19:07

I dunno, I think never having to read We Honestly Can Look After Your Dog again would make me pretty happy...

tiktok · 19/04/2006 19:10

Thanks, Pruni. :)

I have to say I am always tempted to swipe at hypocrisy, at deliberate ignorance, at nastiness, and at pretended outrage, and at sneering, and sometimes I give in to temptation (not always - I sometimes type and then delete). I also don't like it if someone has one single experience and draws a general conclusion from it.

I never, ever (hand on heart) swipe at formula feeding or at women because they are formula feeding, and I am not tempted to, either.

Flip

1 2 ··· 6 7 8 9 10 11