High-Need Baby Support Thread II

[tickleme63]

Hey ladies, here's a shiny new thread for us to discuss, query, whinge about and rejoice our high-need bubs!

Pretty bad night last night, bleeding exhausted. Can see why so many of you co-sleep. We haven't gone down that route, but it's never looked so attractive...

Gawd, grizzly DS. Poor tooths. Hope you have had a decent night!

but and so. Darn phone!

We were thinking the same for our little fella as well. Although he still feeds so much at night I really don't relish the idea of traipsing too and fro all night :( Last night was better than the night from hell. Still a bit rough, but we got more sleep.

I'm becoming more and more convinced that we need to get on some kind of routine for our days. I have no idea how, or where to start, but I'm getting really fed up with having zero time to get anything done, having to fight for all his epic 30-minute naps... Just everything really. No idea whether a routine will help, or even work. But I'm so tired. He's tired - rubbing his eyes almost straight after naps, despite being unable to be resettled.He's getting so heavy to walk/stand about for 30 minutes while he naps in the sling.

God help me, I even downloaded the Baby Whisperer book last night. I need to fix this. But I just don't know how or where to start :(

Wow Mampig that is amazing!! God I hope I get such good results, does give me hope! Were you co-sleeping before?

Tickle, I so know what you mean, I have so many things I need to tackle I just end up having no idea where to start. My DS has been feeding considerably less overnight since getting to 3 meals a day (still wakes lots but not for milk!) If I remember right your DS is a little younger and not on solids, or in early stages of them? Perhaps it'll improve for you when he's eating more?

tickle - I've got my DS having 2 or 3 good naps a day by feeding him to sleep in our bed then rolling away commando stylee getting up and leaving him there with the monitor on. I've been doing this for about 6 weeks now and if we're out, he'll fall asleep at the same times wherever we are! I'm now working on not feeding to sleep by feeding until he's sleepy and sticking his thumb in.

I left DP to do the bedtime routine for the first time last night (got a last-minute appointment to have an implant put in!) and not only did it go well, but DS slept for 6 hours straight! shame he woke up every 1.5hrs after that but it's a start

Tickle - I do similar to Spanner, feed lying down, then roll away from DS (or stay next to him and have a nap myself ) and have recently been able to stop feeding him using the pantley gentle removal method and let him settle himself to sleep (still with me right next to him though) Through doing that we managed to get into a decent pattern of napping from 9-10, 12-1, 3-4 but over the last few days he seems to be able to stay awake for longer and has been napping from 10-11.30 and 2-3. A friend got her DD into a routine by taking her out in her buggy at the times she wanted her to sleep to get her used to it, then moved onto settling her in bed. Not sure if either of those ideas would work for you?

Our big problem at the moment is settling back to sleep between sleep cycles. DS sleeps for 45 mins then wakes up and if he can see me he'll go straight back to sleep, but if he can't he'll wake up and scream. Anyone faced this? How did you get round it?

Thank you ladies for the tips :) Unfortunately(?) DS has stopped feeding to sleep during the day! He's done it once recently that I recall, as he wasn't himself and was getting overwrought, but normally he feeds at the speed of light and pops off at the end to have a good stare about the place and goes bonkers if I try to offer more. Am beginning to worry that he's becoming a bit 'meh' about the boob - the other day, he took a bottle of breast milk from me absolutely without fuss. At night he'll do it though although whether he stays asleep once we put him down after night feeds is anyone's guess.

I keep swinging wildly between 'god, I need us in a routine, NOW!' to 'lets just meet his needs and he'll nap longer when he's ready'. With only a month and a bit till I'm due back at work, a massive part of me doesn't want to put DS through the stresses of a new routine when everything is going to change so much soon anyway :( Ah, the joys of being a mum!

Poor little fella has still got the remnants of a cold. Hearing little coughs every now and then on the monitor, bless him. Hope you all have good nights!

Jen, we co-sleep after the first waking, and still do to save my sanity. I couldn't quite believe it!! Now working on the naps, but according to 'no cry sleep...' that should come more easily once the nights get better - here's hoping!! Bit difficult for me tho, as it the cm doing that, and she's struggling- still on 30 mins for her, but occasionally takes an hour. Just wish I wasn't working, so I could tackle it properly.

Sleep well everyone

Truth- from what I've read, I think you just keep doing that- ie anything to resettle and in time the sleep cycles connect themselves. Just stay close to him before the 45 min mark so that he doesn't waken fully between cycles, it supposed to sort itself then... that's the theory- still working on it here, but with only weekends to do it, I'm getting nowhere!

Yup, every 45 mins again tonight... pants. He's crying now actually, DP is upstairs trying to settle him, but I can hear sobbing on the monitor I might take your advice Mam and be upstairs in 40 mins time in the hope that he'll see me and settle rather than just wake up and cry.

Tickle, have you seen this thread? I haven't tried it yet, but might give it a go and it might work for the issues you're talking about.

Wishing you good nights...

Every hour. Every flipping hour. Until 3am, then every 20-30 mins.

He's got a cold now too so can't see it improving yet.

Thanks mampig, you've definitely given me some hope. Last night every little thing seemed to wake him so maybe it really will help. Think we'll be trying not this weekend but next (have DP's other boy staying this weekend)

Morning gang. Sympathies to anyone who needs them!

Exciting news, I met my alter-ego the other day randomly. Has a DS a day older than mine who co-sleeps, bf, insists on being carried etc. was such a relief to meet someone going through this in RL. Even better - she has made 3 friends with babies who are exactly the same. We are all meeting up tomorrow, I will feed back any tips I glean!

DS hasn't been too bad. Know I'll jinx it now but the last 3 nights, he has gone to sleep and stayed asleep after I'd done the feed and roll manoeuvre, so I've had a couple of hours in the evening. He's still waking a fair bit at night but at least it's progress, of sorts!

Oooh awesome Queen :) I'd love a few friends in real life that have the same sort of issues. But I mainly have friends with either textbook babies, or they are not as 'sensitive' to their babies needs (they think I need to take a stand and toughen up). Jesus, even my own mum said that I should put him down for a nap, fed and clean, and just leave him for a bit, just returning to put his dummy back in. Dad says I'm making a rod for my own back by picking DS up all the time if he cries. I'm getting a bit worried that DH is starting to think the same :( Sometimes they have me half-convinced. But my instincts are telling me to meet his needs, so I will continue to do so as frustrating as that can be sometimes

Not a bad night here, considering DS's cold. And I seem to have made a discovery that helps get DS back to sleep during the night, and I've just literally put him down in his cot for his morning nap, awake, and now he's asleep jinxes self I have put him on his side and patted his back and he just fell asleep...

He's so going to wake up now and the technique will never work again. But I'm chuffed to have got his first nap without rocking until he's asleep, or tears :)

Hah! Still only 30 minutes though!

The 'lie on side and pat his back' works here too tickle, as does bouncing his mattress back and forth!

DS is fast asleep following a swimming lesson and I am eating cake... anyone want a slice?

Me. I do. I have 8 weeks til we go away. I'm three stone at least overweight but any diet makes me miserable as eating makes me feel better about being up all night and dealing with all the crap that's going on with allergies etc. So yes. I WANT CAKE.

Mystery outbreak of eczema today all over ds's face. Two night time poos - both highly toxic and houdini-esque. Rubbish between 2 and 6 but then slept as did I so dds left me (being little angels) so I overslept and ds1 was late for school. Having a not so good day, I must admit!

we've been gently asked if we'd like to leave our buggyfit class as DS had another major meltdown in the pushchair - this one was so bad that I had to carry him while the instructor pushed my buggy!

I've tried 4 classes now with the same result each time. All the other mums have perfectly behaved babies who either sleep or just look around quietly :( it's a shame because I really enjoy it!

That's why I don't do buggyfit Spanner! I'm terrified that DS would go into meltdown and I'd start sweating for all the wrong reasons.

Our local gym has a creche though so I've been going to classes there and leaving DS in the (quite frankly magical!) arms of the lovely lady who works there. She's much better than DP or I at keeping him calm Might be worth checking?

God, same here. DS had a massive meltdown when I took him for a walk yesterday - he desperately needed a nap. Screamed and hollered until I picked him up but our buggy is a bit of a tank and is hard to push with 1 hand. Luckily we weren't far from home but had to put DS back in the buggy, and he wasn't happy :( Just as we were nearing home though, he fell asleep. Poor little guy. Felt so guilty, but I couldn't manage to push and hold!

He is now snuggled on the sofa next to me, sound asleep. Has been for a while now. He napped in the sling but woke up still tired and very upset. Managed to calm him down enough to have more sleep for one of the first times ever... Side lying and back patting strikes again!

Button I hear you with the comfort eating...awful isn't it! But cake really actually does help!

Buggyfit, ha ha!! I daren't try it! I have almost completely given up on the pushchair now, slings r us here!!

I'm praying for a better night tonight. Think I might resort to calpol before bed as the sniffle-teething combo is getting too much. Hope you all manage some good sleep!

Phew - a lot better here. Woke at 12.30 for a feed then heard him trying to settle himself again at 4. I got up to put his dummy in and the stink hit me. Poor love was trying to get back to sleep having done another huge smelly poo! I changed him and he then made a 30 min valiant attempt to sleep again in his basket but failed. Popped him in next to me and he was out like a light! I'm not sure why the sudden change to night time pooing though. Maybe if I move his dinner to lunchtime and then give him a snack tea that might help? It's all a mystery!

DS is quite happy in his buggy (thankfully for my poor knackered back!) but I'm having terrible issues fitting him in! I have a Loola but even with the crappy extensions supplied by Maxi Cosi he's jammed in but only just. So I'm thinking of chopping it in for another (via ebay obv!) but I don't know what to get. I've got a really decent umbrella buggy, so it's a proper pram/pushchair I want, ideally still rear facing. Something that can handle dodgy terrain for dog walking etc and will stand up to another 2y+ of 4 miles each day school run. I'm looking at a P&T or a Bugaboo possibly as there are so many of them available 2nd hand. Anyone got any suggestions? Space is not an issue as I don't mind if my boot is full of buggy and DH has a van so no issue there!

I have to share this. Just put DS into his cot sleepy but not asleep and then patted and sang to him until he fell asleep. It worked!! I also put his mobile (lights only) on and the sleep sheep playing white noise. I normally have to feed him to sleep and then roll away commando style. The whole bedtime routine from coming upstairs, nappy change, massage, into pjs, story and asleep has taken just over 35 mins. It's a revelation!

I'll have jinxed it now and he'll wake up in 10 mins, but I'm enjoying it for now!

Oh and button - sorry I have no buggy suggestions. I just wouldn't really recommend ours (mamas and papas sola).

Our icandy jogger is fantastic and goes off-road along the river bank very well. Rear or front facing, and easy to collapse one handed and pretty light.

... just a shame DD hates it! ;)

I'm so excited. Today I decided to revisit our moby wrap, as the babybjorn was wrecking my shoulders. After studying tutorials on YouTube I managed to heave Fatty Boom Batty into it and it was so comfy for both of us - I wore it and him for ages. Then I managed to talk DH into spending some savings on a brand new manduca sling, so we can both cart him around on our back, front and hips. I feel liberated and just want to ditch our mamas and papas sola, which I wouldn't recommend either - my shins are covered in bruises from heaving it up our front step and the bloody thing has broken twice. I'm so easily pleased!

Slings are ace... I'm afraid I've got addicted to the damn things and now have (counts on fingers...) 4 of my own, and one borrowe d- all different types and colours, and I now want a shorty woven wrap.... suppose I should sell the pram to pay for them!