High need baby support thread

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Does this sound like your baby?

1. Feeds frequently daytime
2. Feeds frequently nighttime
3. Needs to be constantly held
4. Wont sleep alone
5. Hates the car seat/pram
6. Short naps

If so - join the club! :)

Second what Titania says, but know exactly how you are feeling lady. My Hubby always says that no one benefits from the feeling of guilt, not me nor DS, and so to stop feeling it. I say if only it was that easy - to just stop. He says it is...

Agree that meeting baby's needs while keeping a semblance of sanity is the way forward, but I'm sometimes not great at taking my own advice (not eating a thing until 2pm because DS is crotchety and he comes first - and then wondering why I'm so fatigued and tetchy...)

DS had another v.hungry night last night. I don't understand how he can go 5.5 hours without a feed one night and the next be up every 2 hours. I know it's because he's developing and changing every day but a little more consistency would be good...! Not consistently bad though, if you please - had my fill of that!

Button What a palaver! I really hope you get to the bottom of it lady.

Went to see another nursery yesterday. The staff were nice, but I didn't get that 'this is the one' feeling in the slightest. Seeing another tomorrow evening. Have a lump in my throat every time I go into one though :(

I agree. Whatever you do, someone somewhere will be able to provide evidence that your doing something damaging to your child! I think the only thing you can do is follow all the necessary bits about safety like car seats etc religiously and then use your common sense for the rest.

Your ds knows you love him and you are there when he nee. A little bit of crying to get him to sleep is not the end of the world. In fact, ds1 used to cry himself to sleep whether I held him or not and cried no more or less whatever I did. So in the end I just used to leave him to it! He is now a very happy 4yo with no separation issues at all.

Think men have a guilt switch tickle that they can just flip if necessary!

Just whipping in and out as we exchanged on our flat last night so all systems go for a move out of London next week - ARGH!

DS2 still sleeping appallingly - I'm getting by on between 3 and 5 hours broken sleep a night.

Ah well.

Hope everyone gets some sleep soon - I'll come back to this thread once the move is done and the dust has settled. DS will be going into his own room once we move into the new place so hopefully that will make a difference

:)

Good luck with the move Bicnod :) Congrats on the exchange!

Ugh, ugh, ugh. Horrible evening. It started well, DS sucking merrily away on strips of chicken. Then it came to his bedtime breast feed. I know he was overtired but he just exploded, howling and refusing to latch on for more than a few seconds. It was frightening how hard he was screaming :( I think maybe he was too tired and hungry and my milk wasnt letting down fast enough, as DH managed to give him a bottle once he was calm and he went right to sleep afterwards.

The worst thing was when I had him to the breast, trying to calm him as he was getting hysterical, and he cried something that sounded the most like 'mama' he's ever done :(

Hoping he'll be okay for his night feeds tonight. For a change in actually looking forward to him waking for a feed just so I can hold him close.

Rambling now, sorry... Just couldn't stop the tears earlier :(

Oh tickle, that sounds horrid. But it's over now and he definitely won't remember it when he wakes. Be kind to yourself and don't dwell. Try to relax - maybe put channel 4 on and watch these poor bastards squeezing babies out of their foofs! Sending hugs, sounds very traumatic.

Tickle totally understand - DS is so wriggly now that he won't just lie down for a cuddle anymore. I miss that and for all that I hate the wakings I do like the snuggly night feeds.

I know what it's like when they get so upset you cant calm them down- its horrid.

Hope you feel better now and that your DH is giving you hugs to tide you over until you get baby ones.

Met my boss for lunch today - DS was pretty good really. I struggle with what to take for him to eat when we're out. I take snacks rice cakes etc and he loves grated cheese if I reform it a bit into a cylinder he finds that easy to pick up and and get into his mouth. I also took his new fave - apple wedges fried in butter and cinnamon. However cheese and apple do not a lunch make - any suggestions?

Anyway boss is lovely and has already got a post in mind for when I go back that fits with part time but is still interesting & challenging. My previous role required loads of travelling so I cant really go back to that. Am almost looking forward to it in some ways - its still about 5 months away though.

So DH and I started talking about nursery and part time working and then weaning DS off the boob. I originally wanted to keep feeding until he's one, but we both agreed that we shouldn't wean and start him at nursery at the same time (I get a years mat leave). So DH suggests weaning at 10 months. I'm not sure how I feel about that at the mo. If I explain to DH that I want to continue a bit longer I'm sure he'll support me, but the thing is that I've been thinking I might want to feed for a bit longer than a year. Always (wrongly) thought that was a bit weird but it seems so natural now.

So sorry - that post was way longer than I intended. So enjoying OBEM, now I'm not pregnant!

Hugs tickle, I can definitely sympathise, seem to have had a few of those hysterical episodes recently and its just awful.

Had a shit night last night with DS up every hour from midnight until waking up for the morning at 5. I'm shattered as it's the third time this week he's been like that. Why why why?? I just want some bloody sleep! He's really grotty this morning too as he's also tired. Gonna be a great day...

Wanted to comment on the guilty feelings posts, as I totally sympathise, but DS now screaming....

tickle - been there very recently too- must be a developmental thing? I now have to sing loudly and badly to distract and calm him, and it's working. Ikwym about the night cuddles! With being back to work, I almost look forward to them- whole house is quiet, just me and ds awake- really is lovely moment. I'm so used to functioning on very little sleep now that even if ds skips a feed, I usually waken/ can't sleep.

Titania- I never really thought I'd be feeding this long either. Thought I'd stop before going back to work, now I just keep finding excuses to keep going. I even find myself reluctant to feed if we have say my mum or visitors in, as I'm sick if having to justify it!!! Keep going as long as you want to- really nobody even needs to know( not saying it's something to hide of course- personally I don't think it's anyone elses business) I don't deny I'm still bf, just don't volunteer the info... Being back at work, bf is lovely for reconnecting and relaxing after a long day at work. It calms me down, and means I can't get home and do housework etc and end up so tired that I'm useless. It stops me worrying so much about the house etc, and I catch up with the kids- which is really what's important.
queen I wrote a really long post to you yesterday- it's lost in cyberspace. Just wanted to tell u not to beat yourself up! My older 3 were cc- not even pupd, I feel sooo guilty now that I know more about cc. But seriously, they are all fine, and it hasn't ruined our attachment in the slightest!! I know that you lo will be fine as you are too good a mummy and responsive parent!!

Thank you ladies for your kind words. Feeling much better and DS fed well (and lots) during the night. Turns out he is cutting his first tooth! Bless his heart.

Will catch up properly later, bum change required (DS's...not mine! )

Argh - two hideous nights here - pacing the floor in the early hours of the morning. Am feeling very grumpy. DS has taken to waking up screaming. He's always woken up lots but would normally feed back to sleep fairly quickly. Now he needs rocking pacing and jiggling to calm down. He's shattered as a result and so am I. Is there a 7 month sleep regression?

He's dribbling loads but no sign of a tooth, he's also desperately trying to crawl and his new trick is to flip himself into his front. Is this just developmental? Please tell me "this too shall pass"!

Hope everyone else is getting some sleep!

Oh sending hugs Titania, sounds rough :( If it is any use, I couldnt see any sign of a tooth until yesterday and he's been teething for what seems like forever. This too shall pass, lady. Having a rough one today as well. DS is so grizzly bless him. Can't believe it's only 2.15pm :( It's piddling down here as well so no escaping for a walk.

On a happier (ish) note, we've found a fantastic nursery for DS for when we're back at work. Had seen a few and not had the feeling that 'this is the one' - I was worried in case I never got that feeling, as nowhere would be good enough, but the one we viewed yesterday evening was amazing :) Outstanding Ofsted report as well, which always helps! Feel like a bit of weight has left my shoulders now that I know he'll be well cared for.

Hope you're all doing okay.

hey.been having a rough few days with the baby - she was so high need first month and a half and then began to settled more but now is starting to get so fussy again so its back to the sling! its hard going. she is definately teething but has something going on in her digestive system too - i had switched to soy instead of cow milk, and this week i had a few lattes with cow milk in it and im worried she has reacted badly to that as shes crying with every feed its very hard. ill soon find out if its that or her reflux flaring up, as ive switched back to soy. i am incorporating massage now into our daily routine and its something we both enjoy doing together so its helping us get that joy in hard times.

If there is a 7 month sleep regression, I think DS is in it, zzzzz....

He has also started feeding again loads over the last couple of days. It's like going back to the newborn days. Except now he can yank my top down and batter my boobs until he gets milk.

that made me smile- ds does that too- bit embarrassing in company

Urgh. I swear I'm not ever going to get a decent nights sleep ever again. Urgh, Urgh Urgh.

We had a couple of great nights but then the pttern is that's followed by an utterly rubbish one. Not just a not so good one but a teeth grindingly awful one Still, he's chirpy so that's a bonus!

Do you all realise that we're going to need another thread soon?!

I can't wait to ditch the swaddle too I cart it about with me everywhere as even for day time naps sometimes ds needs it and if I don't have it it's like a scene from a horror film! I loved seeing the others sleeping all splayed out.

On another note, I am convinced that this latest round of better nights is to do with introducing protein into ds's diet. He's been having 'cottge pie' (sweet potato, carrot & mince!) and 'fish pie' (Sweet potato, carrot & cod - are you spotting a theme yet?!) but he's really into it. He generally has 4 largish cubes of that at about 4-5pm and I'm really thinking it's keeping him satisfied longer. Of course, it might not be doing anything at all, but it's helping my poor brain thinking that it is! He also has 3/4 cubes of rice pudding in the morning (homemade with soya milk and cinnamon instead of sugar). It does seem to be helping to reduce the amount of milk he's taking which of course in his case with the reflux is the aim - to replace asap rather than complement as you would with a 'normal' baby. He's going to be on 3 meals soon but I think he'll be having 2 dinner type meals as I am struggling to think of lunch-type meals for his age (6m) which don't use wheat

how about ricecakes with houmous/mashed avocado? Or if he's ok with egg you could make omelette strips? Or things like a thick veg soup, maybe with a few lentils for protein. And quinoa porridge - it's a complete protein so more filling than oats and I think it's gluten free.

DS isn't doing too badly but he's got into the habit of waking after 1.5hrs and needing to be cuddled back to sleep. I don't mind too much though because I don't get many cuddles now he's more interested in sitting at his play gym and trying to chew through the bars playing by himself. He's very dribbly too but no signs of teeth yet, although his gums look inflamed over where the "fangs" (can't think of their official name!) would be, I hope he doesn't get those first or he'll look like a little vampire baby!

Took over an hour to get DS off to sleep this evening. Argh - I imagine he'll be awake again in an hour too. Oh well. Other than no sleep we've had a pretty good day. Hope you are all having calmer nights than us!

Hi everyone- just found a wonderful parenting website ahaparenting.com
(sorry, can't link from phone)
It's great for reassuring us that what we are doing in being responsive etc is actually so worth it in the long term. Hope u all get some sleep tonight - I too would just live a full night sleep- been a very long time.....

Oh my goodness my child is the same if we are out and about she is so chilled and will just check everything out, the minute we are home she is miserable… wanting to see if a common thread could be traumatic birth? My daughter was in distress for a long time and came out with the cord wrapped around her neck