Non-racist chat forums

[PinotGrogio]

Not sure if this will appear in Active but really I just want to hear the experiences and opinions of Black (and even Asian) MNetters here.

Given the descent into racism of this site, are there any other non-racist ones you’d recommend? I’ve had a look at Tattle and quite frankly that’s worse so it’s a no from me. Plus they’re kind of obsessed with “influencers”, in whom I have no interest.

It’s just a shame that the racism has seeped into all boards here - even TV and S&B is no longer safe. Anywhere else that isn’t a total cesspit?

Exactly and therefore, report and ignore them

I find it astounding that women who claim to be feminists can be so utterly dismissive of the experiences of black women.

Only recently there was a thread analyzing black female athletes saying that they might be men which is one of the oldest racist tropes around. When called out they blamed transwomen for their racism.

I’m really wary in prepper spaces (and I am a prepper - I can, bottle and dehydrate regularly) but they do attract some…….interesting people 🤣.

I went to the feminism board once a few years ago and noped straight of there, definitely weren’t my people either and knew it wasn’t going to get better.

@NewNameNigel would you mind linking to that thread please? I’d like to save it for later as proof of their racism.

I think a link might get deleted because TAAT but just the thread title may not.

Ah good point @PinotGrogio

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5021135-another-athletics-one?page=1

This is a link. Not sure if this post will stay as the TAAT rule isn't applied very consistently

Just read the thread. Disgusting really but sadly I'm not surprised

Yeah that thread’s racist and gross.

I know some people are going to jump on me here but I'm going to ask anyway. I had a look at the 'racist' thread as in the one about the athlete and cannot see at all what is racist about it. This is all seems a bit like emperor's clothes because I can see exactly what the OP of that thread was saying. She does look like a man! i had to do a double take when i saw her photo and I've lived amongst loads of black women with short hair cuts including skin cuts and never confused them for men. I myself rocked a VERY low cut for over a decade and was never confused for being a man. Serena and Venus are clearly female despite (Serena in particular's ) muscular build. This individual looks distinctively like someone who is either not comfortable in their feminity or might be transitioning or gay but there is a huge question mark over her sexuality/gender that is hard to ignore especially when you're famous. She unfortunately is also black which muddies the waters a bit (as in are people saying she looks masculine because she is a black athlete & trying to nasty or are they commenting on her look because she does not look like most females which come in all different shapes and size but there's a way we know someone is male or not.

What am i missing??

Oh what a SHOCK that the thread is on FWR. No racists there 🫣

I think the issue Rege is that many black female athletes frequently come under this particular kind of scrutiny regardless of their presentation of feminity. Serena is a case in point - she was called a man frequently before she retired. You may have thought her muscular profile was feminine - many people do and did not and this frequently was a charge put against her here (in subtle ways of course).

I think Devynne Charlton looks no different to Megan Rapinoe to me in terms of her presentation. Megan is given more scope to present how she chooses without being called male. I had a quick peruse of Devynne's Instagram page - you can have a look here - it's obvious that she has been hitting the gym hard but and might be presenting in a butch manner (I will need my lesbian/bi ladies to confirm) but you cannot deny she is female.

Thank you @skullbabe really appreciate you explaining it. I don't pay much attention to sport and have not paid attention to comments on social media about black athletes. I do know that the Williams sisters have been vilified for reasons i can only put down to racism even Serena made some kind of statement about it. They certainly do not look like men or would be mistaken for one. I feel looking at the Instagram you linked to Devynee looked a bit more feminine but her head shot to me, looks definitely male. There's something about her hair that seems cut along a man's shape (can't quite put my finger on it). Her profile just looks male and i have to look very closely and see more of her to decide which gender she is, very similar to Casta Semenya just without the height. Looking back at her older photos she has clearly changed her look somewhat to purposefully look more butch, muscles aside because many female athletes have muscles and to be honest she's not even that muscular.

I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt but when you say can't quite put my finger on it you get my dog whistle spidysenses tingling.

The athlete is a woman AND looks like a woman. Femininity comes in all shapes and forms. A haircut doesn't make her any less female.

@TrudyProud I noticed that bs dog whistle too

I’ve been thinking about it - Devynne has a fade which can be done by anyone who does hair but as someone who had a fade twice in my life - the cheapest and crispest ones are done by male barbers. The issue is that butch women have always existed and you would have thought things moved on in the 2020s in accepting that women have a variety of presentations but they are still women.

I always feel so sorry for Caster - how awful is was for her to find out through the press that she had a medical issue which meant that she did not have a uterus or ovaries and her genetic makeup was XY - how psychologically damaging that must have been for the poor child as she was then when she found out. I’m always concerned when people bring her up because she was brought up as a girl and conceives of herself as a woman and she has no external male secondary sex characteristics. It’s no win for anyone what happened to her and now people feel free to be cruel about her with abandon.

The issue with the comparison of Devynne to Caster again goes to the racialised aspect of feminine presentation. Devynne has features which are primarily seen in black people - the reason I brought up Megan Rapinoe is to show how race is informing this. These women are both muscular and have short hair styles - Megan on the one hand has appeared very butch but no different to Devynne and the question then is posed why does Devynne attract the scrutiny and a thread (when a simple Instagram or Google would have given context clues)? I think I’m rambling but just wanted to raise that a bit.

@Rege I don't pay much attention to sport and have not paid attention to comments on social media about black athletes.

But yet you came on here to talk about how you don’t see the racism. Don’t talk about what you don’t know about.

Me too.

Don't be silly. I'm not lecturing people as an expert, I'm ASKING based on what i know so far about it which is what you do if you don't know enough.

1 - don’t come onto a black forum and call a black woman silly.

2 - don’t try to gaslight me; you asked, you received an answer, and yet you continued to go on about how you still think the woman in question doesn’t look like a woman.

3 - it is no one’s job to educate you, but if someone goes out of their way to give you an explanation, which was done very well by @skullbabe , don’t continue to speak ignorantly as though you haven’t JUST been ‘educated’.

@TinkerTiger if you calmed down and got off your high horse AND read properly you will realise i am black poster who's been on here for yrs and posted on various topics. I've also had a short faded haircut for yrs )mentioned in my 1st post) and done by a male black barber who does a fantastic fade! I'm not sure how you've jumped to the conclusion I am white. Just because I am black does not mean I can't question anything, especially in this particular case where questioning someone's sexuality has been put down to racism when as a black woman with a short haircut even I think she looks like a man.

Skullbabe and I were engaging in constructive discussion until you rudely jumped in to shut down discussion. If you don't have anything constructive to say please jog off! this is an open forum for all types of discussion and just because you don't like it doesn't mean you can shut it down.

Being black doesn't mean all thinking the same or never asking questions. We must be able to look at things objectively & not just assume always that it must be 'because I am black!'. Maybe the rant against Devynn is racist, maybe it is not but as black woman who has lived in Africa the land of black women for yrs and has seen hundreds of women with short fine hair cuts I can't deny she looks like a man. You are doing black people a complete disservice with your tirade of 'shut up and go away'.

Looks like we can add “experts on Nigeria and Nigerian politics” to that list…

I can imagine the type of ignorant, racist posts going on that thread. I do not have the stomach to read them any more. Once I see a thread is about Meghan, I just scroll on. So many nasty posters. The tide of hate is not worth being open to, for myself. I hope Harry, and Meghan are having a good life with their children, and are ignoring the rabid noise out there.

Lots of pearl clutching over a sleeveless dress being worn to…shock horror…a school! What planet do these people live on?? I went to school in Africa and the antipodes and female teachers wore sleeveless tops and dresses all the time. Male teachers even wore the classic southern hemisphere uniform of shorts with shoes and long socks!