Black men protesting BLM but exclusively dating white women

[LillyFlower1984]

I’m always confused about black men or men of colour in the media and RL who shout racism/BLM and so on yet when you look at their lifestyle they are married to white women. When you go on to find out more they only ever have dated/married white women.... what are people’s take on this?

@DivineRoyalty

MaveMay1, I said I do not care about white women as a whole. I care about black women and my own image.

But you are shaming black women in the process of trying to uplift us. You can't bring 'white woman with an afro' hypotheticals into this, because when (in modern times) have white women ever been shamed for their natural hair texture? Not often, unless it's short/limp or closer to an afro texture (see the numerous hair product adverts calling frizzy hair ugly/the 'before' picture, etc). They are the current beauty standard. Yes, black women need uplifting, but also, let women be. Sometimes, it's really not that deep. If a person shaves their hair off totally, is that self-hate?

@C130

Afro hair grows perfectly well. it is retaining the growth which can be an issue for some women.

Yes, this is a major problem imo!

I’m surprised women still think like that because I know hair (natural) has been an issue in work places... and not even just staff members either public people too. I have also heard people say they have been perceived differently depending on how they wear there hair.

So I don’t think it’s a case of “she wants to look European”.

It’s a much more complex issue.

Afromeg

And that's the difference..even though you wouldn't do it, you're not slating other women who would/do...it's just not your 'thang'.

Divine: please take notes on etiquette.

@MaveMay1
And you dont think you are tearing yourself apart by putting such negative views on your own natural hair? Coming from someone who have had long natural hair and see women with natural hair I can say AGAIN that afro hair grows faster than European hair. Straight hair appears longer because it doesnt shrink. Go on YouTube and see black women straighten their natural hair and do natural hair growth challenges. I have also had white friends and know their struggles with their own hair. I actually cut my hair short so often because I know that my hair will grow back again so fast. Anyway we have passed that topic and I dont wanna keep going round in circle with you about which hair grows faster or longer. Wether it grows fast or slow is irrelevant to the point of discussion. I feel like you keep saying that because you think it triggers me but it doesnt because I know the truth. It actually makes you look bad to keep degrading your own self image like that, if you are actually black.

@MaveMay1

Such as Somalians? Because they have the hair from the Arab side which is more similar to a mixed race person. Other than that on the contrary Afro hair is slow growing. Like most black people have brown eyes not green!

Nope. It's not. Afro hair (on it's own) is slow-growing is a widespread misconception. You can't generalise this. Some do - others don't. Even in one single family, some family members may have slower growing hair, others will have faster growing hair and others with a medium speed.

Afro hair looks shorter (the tighter the hair/curls, the more the shrinkage will be and the shorter it looks) than it actually is until it's stretched or straightened, then you see its full real length.

European hair also does the same but length shows faster and is more noticeable when hair is straight. So it may appear many have longer hair/faster growing hair but nope.

If you wear afro hair straightened all the time, you'll see the growth faster and it will be more noticeable. This is why braids seem to grow hair because it keeps hair stretched out so you can see the growth.

Many who wear natural hair mention they didn't realise their hair was growing or how much it had grown till they straightened it.

You feel slated and shamed. These are your feelings. Why do you feel that way?

@DivineRoyalty are you being deliberately obtuse.

If Afro hair grew so long why are there so many choosing wigs, weaves and braids!

Just admit defeat. You need to reflect upon this thread!!

Never in my life have I heard anybody claim Afro hair as a whole in terms of percent is faster growing than someone with European hair 🤣

Afromeg

Gosh this has turned intense, reading further.
I don't know... @DivineRoyalty has a point (although I wouldn't put it the same way) and I'm probably walking a minefield saying this as it's a very sensitive subject. But I wouldn't say people are self-hating, etc for wearing wigs. Although I've always thought it would be better to wear natural hair mimicking wigs and weaves than European ones. Just saying. Not really calling anyone anything by not doing it either. To each their own.

Actually reading what you wrote I agree
I never wear straight / European type wigs
Always curly style ones
I know that straight style wigs just look 100 percent fake on me as it’s so far removed from my natural hair whereas my curly ones look really natrual and because most people expect black / mixed race hair to be curly no one ever thinks it’s a wig

@Afromeg it’s on google. You need to do research before spouting foolishness.

You may have seen someone with long hair with Afro texture but not long as in long down to your bum like a white person.

Back it up let me see your images of all these black women with long hair!

Google’s your friend.

@im5050 again though the majority of mixed race women have long hair taken from the English side.

better to wear natural hair mimicking wigs and weaves
Arrgh I meant 'wigs and weaves mimicking natural hair' ...but never mind. lol

Hahahahahaha I will admit your defeat because you definitely have a defeatist mindset. Either that or you are a white woman in disguise.
Anyway, believe what you wish. A lot of black women wear weaves because they havent yet discovered the divine greatness in their crowns.
They wear weaves because they have people like you tearing their image apart and limiting them to stereotypes. You are checking if that abuse will work on me? Unfortunately it wont. I know my worth. I descend from the creator who molded me perfectly into her own image. I descend from greatness. Sorry for you!

I've lurked on this thread, listening to various points of view and just want to state the obvious and say that discussion of issues especially ones that we deeply care about is good. Differences in opinion should be welcomed and respected as we are not homogenous but I feel that some people would like to project their views of blackness on others and are keen to shut down or dismiss diverging views. It's unhealthy and is not in the spirit of the purpose of this board.

On the hair issue - each of us will have our own journey with our hair - your experience is not mine.

I stopped chemically treating my hair years ago mainly because I couldn't be bothered with the harmful chemicals, cost, maintenance involved but also because I liked looking at the hair I was born with as curly, big, fluffy, unruly as it. And that is said with no negative connotation but rather with all of the freedom and liberation that my hair is enjoying.

However, if I woke up tomorrow and felt that I wanted to have straight hair, as I've had before or even to dye it blonde that is entirely my business. Call me a self hater if you wish but that's your problem.

Enjoy! Let me know if you need more. Goodbye black woman hater.

This threads got rather hair-raising 😂

@MaveMay1

@im5050

This threads got rather hair-raising 😂

You know! But omg I love us! As soon as I saw 'Aunty! Mba o!' I sat up straight. Reflex

Goodbye black woman hater.

You sound about five.

@MaveMay1

Your showing stupidity. That is not what I said at all. Perhaps you want to re read what I put!

I’m astonished just because I’m telling you Afro hair is slower growing generally your getting heated.

Bush girl for real!

Wow! Are you okay? So I'm heated because you told me afro hair doesn't grow not because you insulted me? Chai, you're beyond recovery! I can see everything @DivineRoyalty said about you is true. It's as clear as day.

Also, so because I wrote in Igbo Language, I'm a 'bush girl' (the old trope) and you spouting rubbish in English Language - albeit poor SPAG - is superior, eh kwa? You're a modern township girl, abi? You see your life? Hypocritical ewu! Tomorrow you will sharpen mouth to say white people did this and that to you but here you are! Not surprised.

One day you'll look back at this and laugh at yourself. Iti bolibo!

I can't even remember the last time someone called me a girl but it's the internet for you - so many warriors. At least 'bush woman' would have been a better term.

Abeg, I can't waste time arguing with someone who may be my dc's age, so jisie ike. Google that. Anu Ofia!

@DivineRoyalty you know a lot of women do their natural hair still even with a wig right? I wash my hair the same as you. I have braids under a wig always.

Right now I have no wig. Just my actual hair out however I will not shout down on women who are wearing weaves because I have my natural hair out.

When I am ready I will be going back to whatever I fancy because my hair doesn’t define me as a person. It’s not that deep... it doesn’t make me less black.

You do not account for all black women. You cannot impose your view on others. Assuming black women don’t know things because they CHOOSE to wear a wig what made you come to that conclusion!!

Your ignorant by far. Black women do know!! They just don’t want to wear their own hair at times for whatever reason.

This is the part you fail to comprehend.

BlackIsBlackIsBlack

Thank you. Anything useful to share? Did you watch these amazing videos I have posted of fully black women with very long hair once they straightened it. Your partner in crime will run crying now.

@Afromeg I said it’s SLOWER growing. Compared to English hair that is what I said. I did not say Afro hair doesn’t grow at all.