The PESH deli where we were so distracted we forgot to think of a new title

[FannyPriceless]

THE NOT-LIST

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24
CUNextTuesday, born June 29
Skihorse, boy, born 1 July

UPDIFFED
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
Carrots, giving birth in a lavender field, damn it, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, she bought a racehorse, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee)
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy)
maswera, jungle hottie - due November (???)
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25

and do people eat raw shellish?

I have had raw prawns before. By accident while In Foreign. I don't intend to repeat the experience. Raw fish is yum, raw prawns are boaktastic.

Nothing wrong with paella. Properly cooked shellfish served hot is fine.

honey Pelvis back to normal straight after the birth? Um, no, mine has never quite got back to how it was before. But I am hopeful it will one day. Last pg after lots of pilates I felt strong enough to ride a horse again after 10 months. But I had it really bad. Lots of people skip out of the hospital with their baby and never look back.

Like sushi and stuff nice but I can't imagine eating a raw clam!

moo how did appt go?

oysters generally eaten raw I suppose.

I agree though, nothing wrong with paella.

"I'm ignoring Skates because she still only has question marks next to her name."

1 September

mmm, oysters. Was salivating over an episode of Mad Men last night where they were eaten a platter of a dozen at a time.

Anyway, back to baby matters, my scan appointment has arrived - 20 August, when I shall be exactly 12 weeks by NHS calcs, but 11 by my own.

am aware it's fine, am not stressing about it, just amused...

By The Pregnant Fretter's Guide, all shellfish is risky, even if cooked... as is chorizo, as are ready meals. So a ready meal of prawn, scallops and chorizo is a BIG worry. If you worry about things like that. Which I don't.

Oysters are the food of the devil. I was once taken to J Sheekey whereupon I scoffed 5 or 6 of the slimey suckers. Cue major projectile vomitting session in a nearby bar (waiters were wiping the walls down with window cleaning wipers I kid you not). I swear to god they nearly killed me. I can't even look a scallop in the eye these days.

All that said, gin I'm sure a few mussels in a paella won't kill you. Then again, I'd steer clear of M&S risotto

So I LOVE my new french physio. She was the business. Did weird contortions with my body and stretched out back and pelvic muscles all round. She was horrified that I hadn't had any back pain yet given how tight it apparently is. All those pre wedding military style PT sessions seem to have helped I reckon, despite doing sweet FA since last Sept. Anyway the diagnosis is probably not SPD as I would be in more pain apparently. The escalator exertions have stressed all the ligaments and I have to do a range of stretching exercises every day. And not walk too much until I feel completely normal (???). She also gave me a super dooper massage and tips on stretching in labour. Apparently in France women get physio before and after as a matter of course to help strengthen pelvic floor. Why is it in this country you only get help when something's broke?

Anyway feel relieved and going to do pilates and massage every week now I think.

Woo hoo skates not long now. Have you got your posh nightie picked out for hospital minibreak? There's a good pub opposite which I used to frequent more than was strictly healthy.

Tis probably the G&T you had BEFORE the oyster moo that made your barf! Apparently not a good combo. Champagne on the other hand is the perfect accompliment. I can't stand them though either - slimy saltiness down my throat? Bleugh! Glad you have been stretched and poked and manipulated back to fine fettle.

Kleenex Balsam tissues are the best for poorly nose!

'lo all, soz not been around much. Chorizo too? I didn't know that. I am not even sure what is on the 'banned list' this time as have not checked.

Can I ask the second-timers, will you be following advice and buying new mattresses for cot/moses baskets etc? We spent a fortune on MadamMoo's mattress (or rather, my ma did) and it is still pristine. Was going to use it again but got sharp intake of breath from MIL when I suggested it.

On the moving front, I've been feeling the Shrimp move for the last 3 or 4 weeks and I'm now having regular daily movements, especially when I am sat down, or in bed. I'm almost 19 weeks eek! I love it, it actually feels real all of a sudden and I can't stop stroking my bump - not that most people notice there is a bump

La la la Skates not listening. I want to be next!

Famously I ate a raw prawn sandwich in May - ironically it seems my pre-eclampsia may have been my body rejecting Bear himself. Did not reject raw prawns. Isn't that awful? That pre-eclampsia may be your own body's immune system rejecting your baybee. Apparently swallowing lots of sperm is a good way to get around this. Report clearly written by a bitter, bitter, bitter man!

reggie Do you like the consultant? Your Connie lady? If yes, I'd go under her care - well, discuss your options first. I think I'd rather have a bastard consultant I can argue with than a non-plussed mw who doesn't give a shit either way.

lol @ "Satan on a unicycle" - I'm enjoying your work on the risotto thread ladies. What a bunch of twats indeed. I feel guilty about slagging off nervous nellies on the pg threads now - so glad to see you lot are running with it!

polly We will be re-using Bear's stuff for the next one assuming it's not retrieved from the shed covered in mildew... surely this "don't re-use" stuff is i) over reacting, ii) a marketing ploy and iii) to stop people using the aforementioned mould ridden shit stained thing? You know, in the same vein of treating all women as though they're raging alcoholics and therefore screaming every time they have a fucking risotto!

Ok ladies, can we talk constipation please? Sorry.

So I am trying to drink plenty of water (averaging 2 or 3 75ml bottles of water a day), I have bran flakes with sultanas every day for brekkie, 2 apples at lunchtime, generally plenty veg as we tend to eat things like pasta with veg sauce, couscous with roasted veg etc for tea ? it?s all Mediterranean veg really, tomatoes, courgettes, peppers rather than peas and carrots.

But I?m really struggling. For the past 10 daysish if I don?t take 2 senokot at night, no dice. Will speak to MW tomorrow to see what she suggests, but wondered if you had any suggestions?

re oysters, not that enamoured, but they're better than snails.

cossie Have you tried BUMSEX?

Cosmoid if I were you I would ditch the bran flakes (too processed) and have Porridge in the morning with honey or golden syrup or whatever you prefer. This is GUARANTEED to work. Also brown rice with your lunch and dinner. I buy the stuff in a presealed packet which you stick in the mike for 2 mins. Really tasty and good for mixing with fish and veggies for next day's lunch whilst cooking dinner. Basically you need more roughage. Cruciferous veggies like broccoli and cauliflower good. Not too overcooked either, raw veggies brilliant.

On the supplement side, ditch the senokot and take flaxseed oil and fresh probiotics twice a day with food (both kept in fridge).

If you try all of the above, I guarantee personally in 2 days you will be shitting for Britain.

Oh and orange juice with brekky and coffee an hour later.

Dried apricots in the porridge. Or lovely prunes. I like prunes.

Hmmm poo reckon I may buy new mattress for moses basket as they are only about £12 fine British pounds, am undecided about cot mattress. I checked FSID and this is what they say "It is very important that your baby?s mattress is kept clean and dry. Ideally you should buy a new mattress for each new baby. If you are not able to do this, use the one you have, as long as it was made with a completely waterproof cover and has no tears, cracks or holes. Clean and dry it thoroughly. Check that the mattress is in good condition; is firm, not soft; fits the cot without any gaps; and doesn?t sag" Assuming yours is in good nick then it should be OK.

Sorry Cossie no advice on the pooing or loack of it - it seems as if your diet is pretty wholesome though.

Clearly moo is expert on the pooing front!

Cosmosis, as a poor lowly BESH, I shouldn't speak to you without permission really but I am a constipation expert (had amoebic dysentery for several weeks - never been quite the same since).

If you're owt like me you could eat gravel for breakfast, never mind porridge, and have no effect on your waste disposal system. Avoid senokot if you can: you get dependent AMAZINGLY fast. The only thing that works for me is either so much fresh fruit (esp. green apples) you practically start pissing smoothies, or this incredible Turkish tea called Dogadan. It's got small amounts of senna in it, and other herbal stuff like fennel and birch, and one cup before bedtime is all I've ever needed. Unlike Senokot you don't have to keep taking progressively more as your colon adjusts.

Obviously obviously if you did get hold of some (you can buy it online) you'd have to check with the midwife, but if (IF!) I ever win a diff I'm banking on it...

That wine in risotto fred is pissing me off. Just posted our favourite Zoe Williams article - let's hope that will be the end of it.

fucking daft.

Surely the bumsex will just push it further up there???????

Thanks for the tips everyone, I shall be thinking re my diet. Sadly I cannot eat dried apricots, since a rather unfortunate MS incident - the very idea fills me with horror. Brocolli however I can do, and brown rice also, so I shall ponder some sort of stir fry affair for my lunch.