The PESH Deli for updiffed BESHes who love prunes and smell of wee wees

[rollerbaby]

BESH BABYWIN STATS

This isn't a fucking list - right?

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April 12

UPDIFFED
FannyPriceless, her pelvis went menkul, due June 14
CUNextTuesday, takes no shit from the Daily Mail, due June 28
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
CurlyCasper, hospital botherer due July 21 (girl)
Skihorse, cradle snatching web geek, due July 22 (boy)
Carrots, organic hippy hunter, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, she bought a racehorse, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
Honeymoo, no it's not fucking indigestion, due November 2
silversky, the biggest farter, due 21 October (first baybee)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November
ReginaMonologue, must-get-the-goss-from-ski, due November 20

VAG Wrap tops are the BEST for differs. They make you look pregnant as opposed to pie-obsessed!

carrots Well I've already realised that I'm going to fall in to that category of woman who thinks their child is the most beautiful/intelligent/talented ever - until reality hits me in the face when he's 8. Or I have another.

Has anyone seen John Travolta's wife is pregnant? Aged 47? And with him gay?

okie there is a chemical in bananas which people can have problems with (can't remember what it is, maybe a ketone or something). Nuisance, as you say. LC's is eggs. Took me ages to figure that out - trying usual baby food like scrambled eggs and omelettes.

ski You need to read this about 'Indigo children'. I was when I saw it the other day. Apparently some parents believe their little darlings have a mystical gift which exempts them from all the usual behavioural and societal expectations, because they are so gifted they simply don't fit the restrictions of our non-advanced society.

Or in other words, they are indulged, precocious little brats.

Um, Julian will be beautiful and intelligent, but he'll still sit at the fucking table quietly and eat his dinner. If I can train his dad, I can train him!

I'm one of those ghastly people who will discipline their child! Seriously, I know how it's going to go around here - it's going to be "just you wait until your mother gets home".

I will now go and read that but I fear it's going to have me gnashing my teeth and wishing to inflict violence.

Apparently is the same chemical as in latex -let's hope he is not allergic to that in his older teenage years! Mini C has a lot of food problems TBH - and he therefore has regular allergy testing at hospital, fortunately he is not actually allergic to bananas as we have had him tested due to the violent sickness reaction, he just doesn't like them.

AIBU to hope Clint is allergic to bananas so that I don't have to touch them myself?

Well done gay John Travolta! I heart him even if he is (a) in the closet and (b) a Scientology weirdo

Ski wrap tops in general are a Good Thing. Preggo Isabella Oliver tops like the one I'm wearing (bought for a wedding as a treat) is gorgeous and hopeless at the same time - it's like bandaging oneself into the top and means that when I move about bits f my flesh poke through and that when I go to the loo (frequent) I have to re-wrap the layers all over again to try to guard against skin-flashes. And the amount of windy fabric is a bit bulky. It's lucky it's such a gorgeous colour and that I don't have much choice in my maternity wardrobe otherwise this would be buried at the bottom of the can't-be-arsed pile. I tried to take a pic of the bump to prove to my mum and sister that I am already whale-like but somehow the bump looks smaller in photos. Not sure how this alchemy works - is reverse of normal.

LondonPESH-Up: weekday evenings suit me more as weekends are booked up until Clint now (any spare corners of time are strictly allocated to Purchase Of Essentials until these have been made). I can do any night bar Monday (preggo yoga night).

Ooh ski you don't want JB to be saying that! (Ooops did I just tell you how to parent? Sorry!). Rule in the carrots house - neither of us will allow or expect the other to discipline for us - neither of will be seen as a soft touch!

I have had my MIL say that "her sister" thinks that I'm too hard on LC. She also comments on how well behaved he is . TBH we're both extremely strict but also exceptionally loving and cuddly. We take no shit from our little boy . But tell him all the time how much we love him, loads of cuddles and we do stuff with him all the time and enjoy his company.

IMO you can only enjoy the company of a child when they behave well. So I'm all for discipline! And all for enjoying your kids.

Vag I too have that very same wrap top and I heart it. I have it in black and wore it yesterday (hence looking preggers and not fat) and love it so much I ordered it in red too. I do feel like a Mummy in it though (of the Egyptian variety). I have found wearing a black vest top under it combats the flesh flashes. Which colour do you have? I am also tempted by the purple by at 70 sheets a go then to have 3 is a bit extravagant.

Hokey I have "Sea" - is such a pretty colour. (Black/white both v unflattering on me so I tend to go for colours - I keep being tempted with the red one but then remembering what a faff this one is.....)

I miss Iggs Is she on an exotic beach somewhere? Can't remember if she said.

En France innit.

I miss iggs too. Shall we say BUMSEX in her honour?

I have pink JJMMBB wrap top (ebay £3.40 ) which i heart, makes me feel lovely.

Does anyone want a toddler I made earlier? Is being very high-maintentance atm - keeps shouting 'I WANT A LOLLY!' very loudly while I try to reassure my boss on the phone I am doing just fine working at home and not coming into the office more regularly. Then pooing on the carpet, not once, but twice.

you pooed on the carpet????

classy bird!

Oh, how I'll laugh at you in years to come when you are trying to do potty training for the first time!

We have just taken delivery of the old playground slide - OH is a serial slide collector. We've already got slides he was given by family and one we rescued from a skip. This one is colossal though. DD nearly wet herself with excitement, although it doesn't take much to get her to wet herself! He will be building it up all weekend, and has already declared that he will have to test it before DD can go on it.

Yo now i know who boxy is. Will have to put thinking cap on about FP.

PESHNIC if a weekend and during day then Sth Ldn is ok. If weeknight then Central pls otherwise I will never get home and it will end up with me and the pissed freak left on train. Guaranteed. I can do all dates offered.

So anyone used bio oil?????????

Me knows who you are fp!!!!!!

Ps is it normal to find other peoples kids just well horrid and annoying?

Oh thank god silver - at last! I was wondering how much more I was going to have to say.

boxy - Until 24 hours ago I also had a toddler up for offer. Nearly a week of horrendous unexplained fevers, sleepless nights (all of us), and angry tantrums (her, though I nearly joined in too) brought me to the brink. I was seriously wondering what on earth we're doing having another when one is already too much to cope with. But she slept lilke an angel last night and today has been performing songs and dances for me and giggling at everything. So I think I just might keep her.

I don't much like other people's children either. Except a select few. Which wise BESH told me kids are like farts? (You only really like your own).

Though I don't always enjoy my own farts either these days. Better out than in though.

I've just started using Bio-Oil - think Casp's a fan - and if you are interested they are on 3 for 2 at Superdrug at the moment. I'm hoping the miracle oil will also fade the horrible purple spots on my legs due to frequent waxing and propensity to ingrowing hairs.

PS. Clint is showing a marked interest in Glee. He likes to dance while it's on, particularly through Burt Bacarach, but not at all through any modern R&B. I can't wait to take him shopping for shoes and handbags.... He also likes classibal music, though ballet is his favourite. Although I have to say his Dad likes ballet music too so it may not be gayness, merely inherited preferences/metrosexuality. It'll cost me a fortune in Clarins for Men.

Surprise-havers: do you have any "feel" for what your baby will be? I had a strong feeling (based on nothing) that Clint would be a boy until recently, but suddenly she's a girl. Of course, this is all Veeeery Scientific.

VAG I forget, did you find out whether Clint is a Clint or a Clintess? Jailbait gets all distressed when I suggest Julian is dancing - he prefers me to say "converting a try for scotland".

I too wear a vest top under wrap tops - I'm not short of boobage but ffs - some of the stuff I've picked up has been just about slashed to the waist. Although maybe this is because I'm a dwarf?

I took the shrinking dress back to the shop on saturday for a refund (spent it on baybee clothes obv.) - and explained I didn't think it was appropriate that a woman of my age was wearing a bum-skimming, slashed to the waist maternity dress. How are us more mature ladies doing on the "Mel Blatt" front? Would you? Have you?

fanny That indigo child stuff really made me quite annoyed (who'd have guessed). What I am curious about though - is, why is it the mothers who proclaim this? Where are the indigo child fathers? Too busy rolling their eyes, working longer hours at the office and dipping their wick in the office ink? Seriously, wimmins are mad.

VAG wrt your husband liking the ballet - he's "from the continent" isn't he? His national icon is a mermaid right?

I fink boy cos I have only the one name in mind and Husband hates it, so sods law it's going to be a boy.

Bio oil: As part of my research I discovered Superdrug is cheapest place even cheaper than the pikey shops. How long does Bio oil last and what size did you go for? Do you put on at night only? Has it marked your clothes? So many questions!!!

I'm an idiot - I didn't read your last sentence and yet I queried it with my first. I had a strong feeling Julian was a boy even though "everyone" was telling me he was a girl. No science obv. Although there are some who say heartbeat < 150 = boy and he was always late 140s.

I'm 31 weeks today (yay!) and have no inkling of stretch marks anywhere - I've just been using Body Shop butter from a gift set a couple of xmas' ago - and I've not done it religiously either. I think I'm lubricating my skin from within using a diet of Burger King onion rings.

Mmm... BK onion rings. Lucky we live 20 miles from the nearest supply or I'd be the size of a house two houses by now.

ski I am nearly 37 weeks and still can't see any stretch marks. Last time it was like a toddler had been let loose with a purple marker marker pen on my lower belly. I put it down to the fact that all the stretching was done last time so there's still plenty of skin to go round. Seriously, I have only just exceeded the weight I was before I got pg the first time. Yep, I lost a lot of weight between pgs!

MW cancelled my appt yesterday as she was busy at a home birth. I didn't mind that excuse - yay for new baby somewhere out there.

I have also got some results back from the hospital. Would you believe they swabbed me to test for MRSA? (Result negative.) Apparently it is standard pre surgery now, just so they know exactly how many deadly killer bugs are floating around the operating theatres.