The PESH Deli for updiffed BESHes who love prunes and smell of wee wees

[rollerbaby]

BESH BABYWIN STATS

This isn't a fucking list - right?

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April 12

UPDIFFED
FannyPriceless, her pelvis went menkul, due June 14
CUNextTuesday, takes no shit from the Daily Mail, due June 28
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
CurlyCasper, hospital botherer due July 21 (girl)
Skihorse, cradle snatching web geek, due July 22 (boy)
Carrots, organic hippy hunter, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, she bought a racehorse, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
Honeymoo, no it's not fucking indigestion, due November 2
silversky, the biggest farter, due 21 October (first baybee)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November
ReginaMonologue, must-get-the-goss-from-ski, due November 20

fanny specific messages of love, smoochieness and get well soon from extreme and scorps BESHs. As well as aries, but I see she has braved the deli already!

x post curls! We are on save old wives tales wavelength!

okie, my husband used to pee in the garden to keep stinky cats out the flower beds. . Only under cover of darkness, mind, and he stopped once we got a dog to do it for us. (actually, I think he sometimes gives it a go anyway, just for that feeling of liberation).

sorry about the foxy problem though. Get ye a farmer-style shotgun. That'll go down well in the big smoke!

What about RSPCA or Tiggywinkles or summat?

Can't we all just lend okie our horses & dogs for a day?

I too am impressed with cheggers expressing.

Hello aries - don't be too long in joining us please!

I used to wonder about the whole "get it out NOW" shtick - but now that he's upside down he's taking up twice as much room as before and I have quadrupled in size since last weekend. So if anyone has any spare pineapple...

rots They do the manipulation here, but a girl I've met here refused it and went for the c-section instead. The only thing I'm worried about wrt c-section is muscle damage. Scars/floppy tummy not so much - but I am worried about my muscles going forever. I need them for my skiing 'n' ridin' y'see.

curly So basically SFF has come home and weed in the garden to mark his territory? Talk about Alpha male!

silver Plz to share with PESH's in other place? We'll all give you hugs & shiz.

reggie You can't be busy all day every day spending your husband's cash. Check in and give us gossip! Did you win a boy or a girl?

Btw - out of curiosity - has anyone had any thoughts about the swine flu vaccination? Given the furore last winter about it all - has it all but faded from government propaganda or are you all just selfish bitches?

ski funny you should ask! Husband asked the midwife about it and she said they weren't actively dishing out to preggos at the mo but if I wanted it I could have it. Figured that unless absolutely necessary we wouldn't.

Ps: tell the teenager that your insurance policies means that only over 18s are permitted to ride or alternatively say you have gone all protective and don't want her being ridden by all and sundry, she is after all not a riding school nag.

I think I'm just going to go with a rather vague "I'm sorry it's not working out". I don't want to criticise her riding or methods - and I don't mind if someone rides her who's not an expert - but I can't be doing with the histronics. E.g., one hack she went on ended up with all 3 leading the horses home and tears.

Ski don't worry about your stomach muscles not being up to riding or skiing - it didn't afftec mine at all. I was extremely weak in the old core muscles department for a while, but I got a good instructor to help me back into riding and put it all back together in the right order and I think I ride better now (well, obviously not right at this minute, but you know what I mean!) Also my skiing is better too - I think I have more of an inclination to listen to people who know more than me now that I have DD and ought to be doing things properly. Bear in mind I had a full-on emergency CS, with recovery in HDU, I was back on horse (against doctors orders ) in 5 weeks, hunting again after 3 months and skiing after 4 months. You just have to take it a bit steadily for a while. You'll be fine!

Okie according to the Daily Mail, shooting foxes is a much better way than allowing hunts - who have been controlling foxes for centuries - to do it. Even in a city, a hunt can employ cunning, trapping and terriers, and would kill a fox quickly and humanely. Or you could buy a shotgun and see who gets taken out by the police armed unit faster - the fox or you!

Now, on to today's 'fucking horses' moment. They are out overnight atm, and I went to get them in this morning. Big horse normally gets caught first, and then the racehorse (shitland has normally gone AWOL at this point.) This morning racehorse came to be caught first. I got his headcollar on and then big horse bit him on the bottom causing him to spook. We have this plastic anti-mud matting in the gateways to the field and in this field it's never really bedded down properly - racehorse spooked and slipped on it, catching me on the knee as he fell completely over on his side. This caused big horse to spook now, and the pair of them took off round the field together like loonies. At this point I conceded defeat and got OH to come and help. They are normally like donkeys, but it was obvious I wasn't going to be able to lead them in together in this state. Anyway, by this point big horse was refusing to be caught and racehorse had got himself in a right state and was just standing there shaking. I decided to just open the gate and let them take themselves back to the stables even it it meant they had to charge across my newly-seeded and resting field. Fuckers! Still - they'll make a lot of sausages.

Another bizarre moment - I've just been on FB, and apparently my brother is taking part in the Cannonball Run in a Ferrari. I say 'apparently' as he only calls me when he wants something, and since the staff travel rules changed and meant I would have to choose between husband and children, or siblings or parents, and I chose OH and DD, he hasn't had much reason to call me. Am surreally impressed that my naughty little brother is racing cars across the States, given what a pauper he has been for years. Unless he stole it, of course!

ski I am liking vague !! Creates an air of mystey. Teenager will soon move on to a new horse.

Hi PESHes! We are at home. Thanks for all the loverly good wishes.

He is, of course, the most beautiful little boy in the world. He has black spiky hair and is very interested in everything going on. He is feeding like a crazed maniac so my breasts are now enormous heavy rock solid mutant creatures spurting out milk all over the place. Even MrP is frightened of them.

Sun roof went very well. The surgeon seemed to take great pride in his handiwork and I have a very tidy looking scar. Hurts like hell though. The first night I was sobbing and screaming for codeine. Second night sobbing due to sleep deprivation, boy demanding feeds every 30 mins, me afraid I was going to drop him due to tiredness, etc. I got the private room after 24 hours, so the big bonus was being able to catch up on sleep on the third day, which means nights have been a bit more tolerable since.

Will post more soon and hopefully get a photo up. I'm feeding him now!

Whoop to fanny. Glad you are home. Milk coming is a terrifying sight for all I think, I wondered what the mutant things on my chest were, they did not look like mine fo sho!

Are you going to give us any hint to his name? So plesed all is well.

Photos are up on profile. He was born Tuesday afternoon.

Sorry no name details. And I'm confused about rots as we didn't tell anyone. Have you got me mixed up with someone else? Did tell my daughter's name though.

Think I'll have a wee sleep now. MrP made me lovely snacks last night of stinky cheeses, pate and potted crab, all washed down with a large glass of Chablis. Yes I know I shouldn't while on drucks but I'm not operating any heavy machinery atm so should be OK.

fanny He's lovely! You must be so proud - of your giant scary boobs too!

New list for next thread - any requests/ideas:

1. polly and the messiah need to be added.
2. silver didn't want to be farty anymmore
3. fanny laid a baybee
4. Gossip on reggie? She's a shopaholic with an addiction to 5* hotels and an "over-bearing mother" - she's our very own Bridget Jones I realise!

ski I still farts like a trooper . It's my EDD that has changed but I still think s/he will arrive on 21 st.

fanny good skills. Already home and typing one handed.

ski I'm not happy about the giant comedy knockers. But they seem to be the only explanation for my other complaint: my non-existent baby-lay weight loss shock!

The maths just doesn't add up. The day I came home from hospital I weighed 2.6 kg less than I did the day before I laid the baybee. But he weighs 3.7 kg, plus there is the placenta, fluid, blood loss, etc. This makes no sense and I wish to complain! By my reckoning I should have been down at least 5 kg, so why do I now weigh more than original me minus weight of babybee? Like I say, the only explanation is that each boob has gained a kilo or so. Which may actually be the case.

Obviously it has nothing to do with my insane hunger levels. One day in hospital I ate the following: 4 pieces of toast with butter and marmalade, a bowl of cereal, roast beef with gravy and yorkshire pudding, apple crumble with custard, pot of yoghurt, leek and potato soup with bread roll, giant baked potato with cheese and ham sauce, ice cream, hot chocolate, carrot cake. And I was still hungry so munched on a packet of dried apricots throughout the day. Diet starts soon, honest.

fanny I believe cheggers is also experiencing some troubles with lying scales. Have you tried flipping the dial to kg thereby ensuring a reading of < 140?

after boasting I knew fanny's boy's name I am now second guessing myself and wondering if I AM mistaking her for someone else, but, who, I can't think! Sorry Fanny. .

That'll teach me to think I'm special .

I still cannot bring myself to go near any scales. Reckon my boobs alone equal a third of my total body weight.

On a plus point bought some bargain maternity jeans today for £25. Tho they are " short " and even tho I do nor consider myself to be be vertically challenged they fit quite well and I have room to grow into which is worrying.

Am also peed off that I went to the supermarket to get some supplies and had a will I won't I dilemma about getting washing powder. Decide not to cos I recall having some at home and I won't have time in the morning to do loads anyway. Slightly hacked off to get home to find one tablet of wp left!!!!!!

Ah yes, the old "pick it up, put it back, pick it up, put it back" in the supermarket routine.

rots Well your part of the world is small - knowing what we know about fanny she shouldn't be too hard to stalk identify!

fanny How is your SPD? More importantly, have you killed your mother yet or is she still on best behaviour?

Strange night - at 4am there were a group of Norn Irish boys and a couple of American girls shouting outside about communism etc. - I have no idea where they were heading to because we live in a road where people don't cut down unless they're parked up... and these lot weren't about to be driving... and also, er, we're not in Norn Iron!

Oh to be drunk young and carefree without responsibilities.

Going to have to go back to the bloody supermarket now. Last night was perfect as it was so quiet in there. Majority of people watching the football. Wonder if I will see the woman who I nearly had an altercation with? Silly tart who can't drive!

This weekend is going far too quickly. Bah humbug!

Oooh are you to be joining me on a daily basis at the crack of dawn? I'm usually on my own until the Brits get out of bed at 10am and fire up the laptops. Are you a shit sleeper or does your baybee demand you get up early and eat weetabix?