~~August 2010~~ tummies blooming into bumps

[CherryPie3]

5th thread come grab a bean bag, theres a cake table in the corner (feel free to help yourselves)

oh byt the way nichy I haven't had any tummy measurements or internal exams (phew - they do not appeal to me! I've never had a smear test cos i'm not old enough yet but not looking forward to it!)

Having such a bad day!

So, first of all I ended up having a good cry because of the amount of work pressure I'm under at the moment and the (worse case scenario) that at my review my work won't be judged good enough, I'll effectively loose my job and the paid maternity leave that comes with it (9 months fully paid + 3 months unpaid).

Then I get an email that tells me as of a week ago my research council T&Cs are changing so that I only get 6 months paid maternity leave + 6 months unpaid. Effectively leaving me 3.5k worse off and significantly reducing my time with baby. Anyway after a lengthy investigate I find these terms and conditions are only applicable from October 1st so as I go on maternity leave July 10th they're not applicable. But this caused me a major panic and upset and I'm really annoyed that this isn't being properly publicized (and that they're allowed to do it without consultation). Major GRRR.

Sorry for the rant

CazEm Already drafted the post-natal list - well, the format of it anyway .
I'm afraid it's a bit of obsession for me, I have a thing with lists!!

Nichy No tummy measurements here either, or internals. In fact Ihaven't ever had an internal in pregnancy except when they were checking my waters were intact at 35 weeks, and also when I wasin labour. But they're kinda expected in those situations - never had one done routinely.
Am 24weeks today - hurrah . maybe the mw will measure my tummy today? Have an appointment at 1:30.

Pample Are they allowed to do that? I thought it was standard that maternity leave is paid for 39weeks? Or is it the company pay structure thats changing? Either way - it's a worry you don't need!! And they should have at least checked their dates before imposing that worry on you!!

Cherry unfortunately it's less clear cut than that. I get 'paid' a stipend rather than a wage, which affords me none of the legal rights of a wage! Boo! But I was totally not aware that they could randomly change terms and conditions in that way (what is the point of T&C's in that way?!)....

Exactly - whats the point in T&C's if they're gonna change them like the wind?

pample - sorry to hear your having such a day... I hope it improves. Sending you positive and happy thoughts for your review.

Cherry - haha, the fact you already have a birth list in draft makes me smile! Reminds me very much of a good friend who also has a thing with lists!! Muchly looking forward to that being filled in late July onwards!

I didn't get as far as the washing afterwards. Plenty of time of things like washing tomorrow! Decided to come and spend a few hours with my Mum before my pamper afternoon! Mums gone out now to take my Granch to a hospital appointment so thought I'd check in on here before going to the salon!

My SIL suggested I ring around a few nurseries to find out their waiting lists for when I return to work. (She is a NVQ Assessor so is always in them visiting her students!) Felt really early to be doing it, but the nursery I just spoke to said they would suggest getting baby down on the list before September (when they lose their top end to school) as its more difficult later in the school year (i.e. this time next year when I go back to work) to get a place. I should only need one day nursery care because I'm going part time, and Mum is going to have her two days all being well too! Anyway, an information pack is on its way... didn't think we would need to be making decisions on which nursery before she was born!!

Have a sunny afternoon all!

Hello ladies

I have problems with my FIL too. He is a nice bloke, just doesn't know when his 'advice' is not welcome Really not keen on his new wife either tbh, so have a feeling that will drive a bit of a wedge between them and us which is a bit sad. In fact, his 'advice' is much more aggravating since he has been with her, so i expect she is backing up any ideas he has, making him feel they are justified.

I am so tired. Got quite a lot to do today too. Friend is over for dinner with her new bf, so need to get housework done, do horses, get DD bathed, fed and ready for bed before 7pm hmmmm. Also making risotto, so need to have started it before they get here. I have no damn energy!! And i feel huge, and everyone is telling me i am huge. If it ends up being a big baby, the VBAC is going out the window i can tell you!!

Hi all! Back from Toronto/US and haven't posted all week due to general frenzy of being back at work etc. Brilliant to hear about all the scans etc - I'm completely bored of how far away mine seems still (23rd), so nice to live vicariously through yours! Hope our baby isn't all bloomin shy though - we're desparate to find out which team we're on!

Nothing much else to report - had 20 wk midwife appt today, which was good. Nice to hear the HB again, even though I know baby is okay, what with all the wriggling I've had every time I eat an Easter egg!!

Nichy - have been really crap with pelvic floor exercises. Barely done any. Really want to get on the case about it though.

Right, better clean my kitchen (inspiring work, ladies!) then I'm off to Mothercare to get a pillow of some sort. I slouch so badly on our sofa, I'm sure it's squashing the hell out of the baby. Looking for something to solve my problem...

Ooh, before I go, a question - um, leaky boobs. What's the deal? Can I expect them at any time from now? If so, any advice on breast pads? (oh, the joy...)

Nichy - tummy measurements are later one, generally. Internals aren't really done nowadays unless there's a problem (e.g. a bleed, prolapse or to check dilation.)

I too am not too good on the pelvic floor exercises and I should be. I need to do more. I ended up with a prolapse after my last birth...

I had my scan today - all's well and it's a girl! I'm really pleased, though I'd have been happy enough with another boy. I rather wanted a girl. My mother in law (who only had one son) is delighted. I'm going to have to restrain her clothes and jewellery buying tendencies!

Aww, congrats on the girly news aendr - have updated the list for you

All went well at the mw today, she's done my referral to the physio for my SPD. She said she didn't know of any 'old wives tales' about the heartbeat/sex of baby thing. She started going about how it's a scientific process and depends on gestation/mums age/weight...etc.

She also said baby is a 'good size'. When she said this I immediately thought "oh jesus it's huge" but she took one look at my worried face and said - "good size for your dates I meant" Phew....

WRT tummy measurements - she said they don't normally start measuring until 28 weeks - hope that helps.

heres another list update
20 July - Aussie #1, Nottingham, 35 20 weeks scan all good BOY
22 July - 4 Aug) Chulita #2: Dorset, 27. 20 week scan all good SURPRISE
25 July - Emster #1, Walthamstow, 29, 20 week scan all fine, SURPRISE
26 July - Rubetube #?
29 July - BouncingBlueberries #2 South London, 33 20 week scan all good SURPRISE
29 July - CherryPie3, #3, West Yorkshire, Age 25, 20wk scan fine. SURPRISE
31 July - Missus84, #1, Bristol. Age 26 - 20wk scan fine BOY
1 Aug - Nikalah, #1, Dorset. Age 35 20wk scan fine GIRL
2 Aug - Dibbydab, #1, Devon. Age 34 - 12 wk scan/nuchal fine. SURPRISE
3 Aug - carolondon #1 North London age 37, 20 wk scan fine. BOY
4 Aug - girlyearapart #3 kingston Hospital Age 30 - 12 wk scan fine. SURPRISE
4 Aug - kcoffin #3. SURPRISE
4 Aug - CarterM #1, Solihull, 36
4 Aug - FireOpal #1
4 Aug - AnnaAndBump, #1
5 Aug - Kanella, 1, Plymouth. Age 37- 20 week scan good SURPRISE
6 Aug - YummymummyKJulie, #1, NW London 12wk scan fine
7 Aug - NichyNoo, #1. Brussels. Age 29 - 20 wk scans fine BOY
7 Aug ? CazEm #1 Newport. Age 25 ? 20 wk scans fine - GIRL
7 Aug - Weehector #1, Largs. Age 36. 20 week scans fine. BOY
8 Aug ? ElusiveMoose #2 Kent 33 20wk scan fine BOY
8 Aug - driedapricots #2 surrey. aged 34 - 12 week scan fine
9 Aug ? Alice #2 Suffolk age 25 20wk scan fine BOY
9 Aug - possiblenewmum #1, Guildford, age 31 - 20wk scan fine - GIRL
9 Aug - thecoffeelady #2, Fleet, Hants, age 32 20 wk scan fine SURPRISE
10 Aug - SassaB #? SURPRISE
10 Aug ? SayAnything #1, Brussels, age 33 ? 20wk scans fine BOY
10 Aug - Ruky786, #? age 32
11 Aug ? MommyDoylee #2, Colchester, age 23, 12wk scan fine
12 Aug - bluecheesefiend #1, 15wk scan fine SURPRISE
12 Aug - tunise, #4, Suffolk, age 31. 20wk scan GIRL
13 Aug ? Neenz #3 Liverpool (32) - 12wk scan fine, 20wk scan fine SURPRISE
13 Aug - augustsun, #2, South London, 34
13 Aug ? babyisaac, #2, North Yorkshire 35
14 Aug - LCRLCR #1, Brighton, age 34, SURPRISE
14 Aug ? babyducky #2, Brighton, age 24, 12 week scan fine. SURPRISE 20wk scan fine
15 Aug - Plant #2 Kent
15 Aug ? LizzieA #1 Wirral, 33, scan ok BOY
16 Aug - Tah2 #3, South Wales. SURPRISE
16 Aug ? cakeywakey, #2, age 32, 20wk scan fine GIRL
16 Aug - Vix206 #1, Leicester, 31, 20 wk scan fine BOY
17 Aug ? Lovesaruby #3 Essex, age 32
17 Aug - Doodleydoo #2 Kent still just 34...
18 Aug ? Isheisnthe #3 Camberley, FPH, Age 33
19 Aug - marzipananimal #1, York, age 23 - 20wk scan fine SURPRISE
19 Aug ? Bubbabear #?, Reading/Berks
21 Aug - loobyt #2, age 34, Devon, 12 week scan fine,
22 Aug ? Cosmosis #1, West Yorks, Age 35, 12 week scan fine.
24 Aug - growningbump2, #2, age 25, Dunfermline, SURPRISE
24 Aug - Hattieboomboom, #?, age 32, South London, SURPRISE
24 Aug - HelenaCC #1, Manchester, age 31, SURPRISE
24 Aug ? JaysFourth #4, age 38, GIRL
24 Aug ? LeeKerry #3 Edinburgh Age 31
25 Aug - Sam86 #2 Liverpool, GIRL
25 Aug ? aendr #2, Huntingdonshire, 33, GIRL
25 Aug - Soontobefatnat #1 SE London Age 30 12 week scan fine
25 Aug - Joey30, #1, Halifax - West Yorkshire, age 30. 12 wk scan fine
26 Aug - pamplem0usse, age 25, #1, Herts 12 week scan/nuchal fine SURPRISE
26 Aug ? drcaroline #2, age 32, Hove, 12 week scan/nuchal fine
27 Aug - Jamiki #3
29 Aug - starshaker #2 & 3 Ayrshire Age 29 12 week scan fine
29 Aug - LilyPad72 #1, age 37, Berkshire, 12wk scan/nuchal fine.
29 Aug - Hildainstant #1, Sunderland, age 30
29 Aug ? FoxyJBro #3, Shropshire, age 30, 12 week scan/nuchal fine SURPRISE
30 Aug - Sparkle #1, age 31 12 week scan/nuchal fine - SURPRISE
31 Aug ? vitapulchra, #4, Guernsey, 32, 12-wk scan fine
1 Sept - mrsZaC, #1, Glasgow, 26
8 Sept ? ronx, #2, NW London, 37 12-wk scan fine

baby count up to now is

boys = 10
girls = 8

getting pretty levelled out now

CazEM - the earlier the better with nursery waiting lists - good nurseries are full months in advance! I'm still trying to get my excellent local children's centre to even put us on the waiting list since it's 12 months long already.

I ordered my pram yesterday! We now have a cot too - feel like I have everything but the baby

Hello. Sorry to drag the conversation back to where it was yesterday, but had a version of the 'was it planned' conversation with my old boss today. He said 'was it an accident?'

Now - just to give you some background to this - I'm 37 - we've been trying for about 2 years, including 2 operations to remove fibroids last summer (after which - bingo!)

An ACCIDENT???

I don't work for him any longer - have given up work and am a student again - partly to reduce stress, partly because 'why not?'. But I worked for him for 8 years - thought he would have known me better and have known better than to say that. Tactless oaf. GRRRRRR

On a slightly different subject - am V jealous of all you people having kicks and can-cans all the time. I'm 19weeks - how much should I be worrying that I haven't felt anything yet? Well - I've had a couple of things that feel like bubbles popping - but maybe that was just indigestion...? What do you think?

I didn't feel any definite kicks til 21 weeks so don't worry! My mum never felt anything with any of her babies til at least 24/25 weeks.

Lilypad my stomach muscles are shot from my last pregnancy (and were never that great in the first place TBH ) so I've felt more movement earlier with this baby.

The 'bubbles popping' may well be your baby moving around. I always feel more movement when I'm sitting quietly, if I'm tearing around it's easy to miss them. You'll be feeling them (day and night) v soon I bet

LilyPad I reckon the bubbles popping is definitely the baby kicking - its certainly how mine started 2 weeks ago. Now he kicks me almost all day long, and wakes me up early in the morning with his acrobatics.

To be totally honest it first felt (to me) like I was going to have terrible wind but after all the popping and exploding no wind came! Now it feels like definite kicks and pokes and my tummy moves so much you can see it beneath my clothes! DH loves it

PS Lilypad, this is my first and I was around 19 weeks when the first bubbles started to pop! Within days they were obvious kicks

I am so naughty. DH has gone out for the evening so I ordered a small Dominos pizza with dips and garlic bread. And it was delicious

Normally DH and I eat extremely healthily so a takeaway pizza is a rare treat for me! I have hidden the boxes deep in the bin outside but i bet he'll still suss me out!

Lilypad I agree with Vix - at around 19 weeks I was feeling bubbles popping, - I think its definately your baby!

The last 2 weeks (so from 21 weeks onwards!) they are getting much more definate kicks! Makes me jump sometimes, and even though I'm positive I've felt a few on my hand on the outside DH still hasn't - I'm desperate for DH to feel her too, really hoping it will be v v soon!

Had a lovely afternoon, very relaxed after my pampering. But I'm struggling to keep my eyes open now after my 5.30 awakening! Really trying to stay awake because I don't want to go to sleep really early again to be up early again tomorrow if I can help it! Got poor DH cooking tea even though he's been at work all day, I'm feeling so tired I can't find the energy to move off the sofa!!

Missus - yeh looks like I'll be getting baby on a list in the next few weeks, go and have a few tours and ask a few (!) questions, look at policies and inspection reports etc first! (Theres the teacher coming out in me hey!!) Might go and see my current favourite tomorrow because they have an open door policy and said to just turn up when I wanted to. Thats a good sign for a start I think, I should get a "real" picture if I can turn up unannounced!

pample hope your day improved hun!

Haha at Vix

CazEM and anyone else looking into nurseries and other childcare:

Yes, when we looked at nurseries, the ones who said "only booked appointments" made us wonder what they had to hide - I explained we couldn't predict his routine and most relented. We didn't go during their busiest times (drop off, pick up and lunchtime) because we reckoned that using a member of staff on a tour, and not seeing the children at normal activities wasn't a good idea.

Don't ignore ones with a "bad" OFSTED. We actually ended up going for one like that. When we toured we openly said "Obviously parents like ourselves who are looking into nurseries will have looked at the OFSTED reports and yours, from a couple of years back, was fairly negative, would you like to tell us what you've been doing since then?" and they impressed us on all the points they'd been picked up on and more. In the latest round of inspections in our area, they were the only ones to get "Outstanding" on all points. There's a website you can look at OFSTED reports - erm OFSTED reports for nurseries and childminders (and schools etc.)

Definitely get names down before September. August and September babies can bear the brunt of parents not quite being ready and so much stuff child related is triggered by the school year.

I can't believe how organised everyone is and already looking into nurseries. I haven't even bought as much as a pair of blue booties!
I'm still being really superstitious and won't buy anything until I get to the magic 24 weeks - I think I may have a busy last few months!

We have put bump down for a place at the nursery where dd3 goes- they only have 9 spaces so we need to geton the waiting list early.

Mind you ~Iam cursing this baby (yet again - poor thing) .. dh is off to walk up the old man of coniston with dds 1 and 2 and I am very but there is just no way I can do it ... we walked up about half the height yesterday and I was feeling quite exhausted ... still never mind

plus I think i have my 1st strech mark -3 babies and not one and now the last .... mind you its not like I wear anything that would revel such things anyway

I can't even think about nurseries yet as I have no idea where we'll be living or when we'll be moving!

Vix, I'm kind of in a similar situation in that we want to move (though stay in the same area), DP is looking for a new job, and I don't know what my plans for next year are really going to be yet as I want to go back to uni next September. But I want to have our bases covered and our name down for a couple of nurseries just in case!

I actually work at a nursery, so it'll be interesting to visit some from the POV of a parent