June-ior middleweights - fighting on through the second trimester (Due June 2010)

[CantSleepWontSleep]

Here we go ladies - I'll C&P the stats in a tick. Don't forget to add the gender on if you find out at your scan

Thank you so much sunworhsipper, nicky and gizmo, i was nervous to see your replies but thank you so much for understanding. gizmo you have hit the nail on the head it is exactly like grieving for what i thought was going to be so that's really really helpful to see it as a process like that. Really so much appreciated, thank you.

gizmo do you think you will find out with this one? Sorry if you have already said.

Sunworshipper i have to say i really regret finding out as i feel like this pregnancy has lost a bit of its magic. I can't find you on the list or remember if this is your first (sorry!) so not sure if you have found out previously but i kind of feel that if i had not found out and then had a boy i would have just got on with it. Of course I can say that now with hindsight but i do wish i didn't know now.

madame Tabitha is lovely! My friend has one and her nickname is Tabbo - very very cute.

mrsalwaysright sorry to hear about your rushed scan but your dh is so lovely to suggest a private one - what a thoughtful chap!

Okay....so on names, what do you all think of Sebastian or Remy??

Just a quick 'un this as I'm in the middle of a frantic day at work (actually, its going to be a frantic week as I'm also covering for my boss so will be in all 5 days!) but wanted to say:

• sorry to all those who had pants weekends and rows with dhs...hope the week improves

• hurrah for all the good scans, even the quick ones and for littlerobbos non-scary fibroids

• gizmo, mine comes on suddenly, is exactly as you describe yours, is SPD and there's bugger all you can do about it as far as i know, apart from try to strengthen core muscles etc. sorry

• sunworshipper, you can probably get the cot checked. almost no paint contains lead etc these days (which used to be the issue), so as long as you air it properly for a few days in the garden once the weather improves it should be fine.

• our cot (used for dcs 1 & 2 so far) was inherited from our next-door neighbours and is an old M&P model. great so far and still going strong. we used my old crib (from when i was a baby!) for the first 8 weeks with both dcs, then moved them into the cot. in terms of spending money, i was delighted to save on the cot as everything else seemed to add up so quickly and although the stokke products look beautiful, it is design rather than functionality you are paying for (NB, nothing wrong with that, per se, just pointing it out ). Same when it came to highchairs later on - we looked at the lovely tripp-trapp and stokke models then ended up with the £10 ikea antelop which has been utterly wonderful. we did buy a decent changing unit though, which has been a godsend as its great to have enough space to change/dress babies/toddlers comfortably without getting a sore back

• LaT......and you thought the biggest challenge would be to keep Sabela amused for the day !!!

DD's 2nd birthday party this sunday and no time at all to prepare due to working all week...panic....[bad mum emoticon]

Still no update from Cadmum?? Hope she's doing ok....

filly amazing how one can always find a window in the busiest work week to keep up to date with ante-natal developments, isn't it ?

And oh shitting arsebuggering damnation, am now convinced I've got SPD. I've just spent half an hour on the SPD support thread and I'm more terrified than I can express. Those of you who have it will not need me to tell you how much it could balls up my life and those of you who don't have it probably don't want the details. Just to say, Mampam in particular, I had no inkling of what you're going through but you have my sympathy (and admiration) with bells on.

Minimoo, I'm going to find out (hopefully) at my 20 week scan. Again I have an inkling that this is a girl but if it isn't I'd like to get the adjustment out of the way before I meet the real baby.

Oh and hoorah for LittleRobbo's benign fibroids....now there's a message I didn't think I'd find myself typing in this life

Hello to everyone

Glad to hear that the scan went well LittleR that mus be a huge relief!

I finally manged to see the GP after only managing to get an appt at 3.30 and getting in at 4.15! she was however great and had a look. She called the Hospital who said they wouldn't scan me but consented to listen for the heartbeat tomorow at 2..... so another night of trying not to worry!

Minimoo I am really secretly hoping for a girl and am not sure what my reaction will be if its a boy....

gina are you going to find out? Good luck for tomorrow i am sure it will be fine, so difficult not to worry tho...

Hello all.

Sorry for the delayed update. Dh has been run off his feet caring for our four whilst re-arranging move details and showing potential tenants through our house. I am just back from the hospital this afternoon.

The Consultant was able to perform a c-section with a vertical incision and 'save' my uterus. (Big sigh of relief from me..)

Baby was a boy which came as rather a shock as I was certain that it was a girl. We named him Timothy and the hospital chaplain was happy to have our dcs involved in a small blessing/sending off.

I was most impressed with the compassion shown by the entire staff and feel blessed to have been so well cared for.

I still need to have my staples removed but otherwise I have been liberated and am on my own to contemplate the next step.

We were strongly encouraged to consider an autopsy and I did relent but apprehensively, as all previous tests have proved inconclusive and the sentimental part of me thinks that this little person has endured enough. A quick check has revealed no obvious abnormalities or explanations.

He had lovely long fingers and the same nose and eyebrows as ds2. It was heartbreaking but I do not regret the decision to see him and neither do the dcs.

Please forgive me if I have told more than you want to hear and if requested MN can delete this post.

I wish you all every success and as I said earlier, I will watch in June from Cambodia to see the birth announcements.

Who knows, I may just be foolish enough to join some of you on another ante-natal thread in the future. We have been told to wait at least 9 months but neither of us feels ready to make a decision at this point.

minimoo - we wanted our 2nd dc to be a girl despite already having one, so we found out the sex so that we had time to get used to it (he's a boy). What got to us was people telling us how great it was that we were going to have one of each, and I just kept saying to them 'we were hoping for another girl actually' which seemed to shock them. I think it's only natural to have a preference. This time I genuinely don't mind which I have, but that's prob because I have one of each already.

madamefreckle - you might not have worked out my name before, but if I told you that my original MN posting name was Tabs then you might hazard a guess!! I have always been more than happy with it (only annoyance for me is that mine has an a rather than an i after the b, so people constantly spell it wrong, but you shouldn't have that problem as you are spelling it the usual way).

Does your GP surgery not have a community midwife attached who could have had a listen for you Gina? How annoying to have to wait another day. Has there been any more bleeding?

Yay for fibroids Robbo!

cadmum, but for saving the uterus in case you decide to try again.
RIP Angel Timothy.

Cadmum you are so wonderfully brave. I'd like to join Cantsleep in RIP Timothy.

minimoon i can totally understand what you mean. We are definately not planning anymore,so i wanted to find out the sex this time so i could get my head round it if it had of been a boy. I distinctly remember my initial reaction when ds2 popped out,i was like,'oh,a boy' I was disapointed if i'm honest,but as soon as the first cuddle happened,i was totally smitten,you'll be the same for sure. I love sebastian and Remy

madame Tabitha is lovely too

We are thinking Summer for our little girl,what do you ladies think?

minimoon however,you may not need to get your head round it because it may be little MissMoon!

Sorry minimoon i am an idiot,fact! just ignore my last post,i got confused,not hard these days. many many apologies.

The average age of the patients at the surgery I go to is about 90 hence the lack of antenatal care! It is crap that I have to wait so long. Trying to remain as calm as possible as there is nothing I can do until tomorrow. More bleeding this afternoon, its very dark though which is a good sign apparently. Dr was worried as she felt somewhere was bleeding but wasn't sure where. She was very reassuring though.

minimoo we are def finding out what it is as I have a need to plan! I also would like time to get used to the idea (either way) before LO arrives!

cadmum thank you so much for giving us an update. Great news that you didn't have the hysterectomy after all. Best wishes to you & your family - my thoughts are with you all, and your little angel Timothy.

minimoon totally normal reaction I think... I have 2 boys, and we found out the gender this time because DS1 was a little too adamant this was going to be a girl, and I was worried about preparing him. We found out it was a girl, and I was happy, but I saw some little blue vests in a shop the other day and found myself tearing up for the 3rd boy I will now not have (we don't believe we'll have any more). I think gizmo is absolutely right - it's natural to form a picture in your head of the future, and then feel a little sad when the plan deviates.

Tabitha, Summer, Sebastian and Remy are all wonderful names.

I'm also feeling a bit knackered and hormonal at the moment. Absolutely massive row with DH at the weekend. It felt like he picked a fight for nothing, the premise of which was that he got a promotion a couple of weeks ago and I didn't seem happy enough about it. He said he didn't understand me, and I blurted out that I was 22 weeks pregnant, he wasn't meant to understand me... then started to cry and he seemed to find that funny. Am ignoring it for now as frankly just too busy taking care of DCs to play mind games.

cadmum - I am glad at least that you felt you were treated with compassion. I think you're brave too, and I hope you get shown lots more compassion in the near future after all you've been through.

laTrucha - thanks for the cot links. I had already seen the cossato one on JL website and was thinking about it. My colleague was loaned one by someone else at work, so I'll ask her what she thinks of it. Good point though that the baby might simply object to going back into a cold cot after feeding.

Minimoo there is a thread about sex scans and are they ever wrong on the pregnancy topic. You'll find that there are lots of mums who are initially upset at finding out they are not having what they secretly wanted. It all seems to work out in the end!

Am still refusing to think about cots/buggies/changingbags or anything until after 20 week scan. Am feeling very apprehensive about it all. Don't know why, have no specific reason to. However will be buying new changing bag as the one I had last time (a silvercross one that came with the pram) was rubbish, really long (like a laptop case) and kept catching on doors. Ended up using a cotton shoulder bag instead (like the bookstart bag!)

And hats off to all of you who manage to sleep with baby in the same room/bed as you. We managed 8 weeks last time and then moved her out to her own room. Babies are REALLY noisy - constant grunting/slurping noises/snoring. And her cry was loud enough to hear on the other side of the town nevermind across the hall so we had no worries about not hearing her!

Cadmum - thanks so much for coming back with an update. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through just now. You are being incredibly brave and my thoughts are with you all.

Great news LittleRobbo - that must be a huge relief!

Good news about everyone else's scans. We have ours on the 2nd and I still can't decide whether to find out or not. Last time we decided at the very last minute that we would find out, and then we forgot to ask!

Hi Ladies,

Glad to hear of all the positive scans.

Sunworshipper DD has the stokke sleepi. We bought the package with the mini and used that instead of a moses basket. She is now 2.5 and still in the sleepi. It is very expensive but we've been really pleased with it. Also bought the Stokke changing unit which has been brilliant for saving my back from leaning over all the time.

Minimoo DH is chuffed about your comments

Cadmum thank you for coming back to us to ket us know how things went. Take care of yourself.

Oh, I also meant to ask whether anyone else is getting killer PMT-type symptoms at the moment. Horrible mood swings and the like. I can't remember if I had this last time, but I've been really horrible to DH recently. I am a little worried because I developed antenatal depression in my last pregnancy - I've always put it down to the awful job I had at the time, but now I'm worried it was my hormones all along.

whenwillisleepagain - we have a Cosatto bedside cot. An older model, I think, not the one LaTrucha linked to but they can't be that different. I know we didn't pay anything like that figure - I think it was on sale. Anyhow it is really good and DS (3.5) is actually still in it with the side right down. It gives more stability than just taking a cot side off, I think.
One thing to consider though is that, although I had it pushed right against my side of the bed, in the end we didn't actually use it with the side all the way down because I felt we couldn't put DS to bed before we went. There was a small gap - possibly due to the bed we had then - which I was paranoid he'd get his arm stuck in or something. We actually ended up just having the side half down like a normal cot, so it probably wouldn't have been worth the money if we'd paid loads for it. I'd still recommend one though if you can afford it or can get a good deal.

Hi Ladies, I am new to the thread. I am 29, due on 23rd June with baby #1.

Anyone leaving in East London? Leyton or around?

Cadmum, thank you for letting us know how it all went. Glad that they cared for you so well and that you were able to see baby Timothy to say hello and goodbye. Wishing you all the very best with your Cambodia adventure. Despite the weight of sadness, you have amazing times ahead of you I'm sure.

bobolana - welcome to the thread!

gaelicsheep - My hormones have definitely been a bit all over the place and I've felt quite down lately for no particular reason -getting up in the morning is a huge battle. Don't think it's antenatal depression though. How did you cope with it last time and did you feel better soon after your baby was born?

Oh, and CantSleep - no, i hadn't twigged! Hadn't thought about spelling with an a... but interesting! There can't be many others about can there? I bet that out of nowhere there'll suddenly be an explosion of them this year - always the way!