The PESH Deli - The drinks might be virginal, but that's about all...

[CurlyCasper]

Come in, come in to the new haven for diffed BESHies. I think a group effort is needed here (and I'm being a lazy preggo), so please add to the deli whatever you crave/love/can stomach.

Nominations are also open for sexy fathers we can hijack to serve our mouldy cheese and cured ham

And the best mocktail recipe wins...well, bugger all to be honest

'I find you unwelcoming and most of your views repulsive.'

Err fanks Bessie... unwelcoming and repulsive - I agree with cas very hurtful.

I also like to think that we can all chat on here - whatever our views... but apparently not...

Hey dudes,

Conception Safari was in South Africa, carrots.

Curly re maternity winter coats, my friend who is due any day now just bought a couple of long bulky cardigans with belts and they have served her all winter, they will be wearable when she is no longer pregnant too.

Which reminds me: although I'm only just pregnant, I clocked a sale of maternity clothes on the Next website and ended up buying a couple of things.

However finding maternity jeans reduced to a tenner and a very pretty dress (that will do for the weddings I'm going to this spring) seemed too good to pass up.

Smacking: I was smacked and was certainly an obedient child but feel reluctant to smack, DH is very anti so we probably wont. My mates with kids say the naughty corner works well.

Re flouncing, I have been posting in internet chat rooms long enough (7 years?) to know that there will always be people who disagree with you and you do not win hearts and minds by berating them for feeling differently. Also, I've found this thread very welcoming and the posters ginsoaked unrepulsive.

Do I post? Or do I keep my mouth shut? I wish I'd never expressed an opinion on this, as has been my policy on previous controversial topics.

Here's what I think. For some of us MNet is actually a really important resource and support, in all sorts of ways. There will always be people with different opinions but we should be able to be tolerant of that, and not keep poking a stick at a wasps' nest for an outcome that benefits nobody.

Perhaps we can all practice saying stuff like: 'Gosh, that's a really interesting opinion. My views are entirely opposite but I am sure we have both thoroughly researched our positions and are always open to considering new ways of looking at things.' Or something like that...

Now I suppose I have probably offended someone, which will be ironic as the point of my post is please can we not go out of our way to offend others - and if you feel offence at anything please consider a gracious and intelligent response, or [gasp] even dignified silence.

Also PESHies with kids, please answer a stupid question for me: DH does a language class one evening a week (useful in his job). He is considering signing up for another years worth of classes.

When we have a newborn, surely this will be hard to manage as (1) I'll want him at home after work so he can cook/ take a turn with the baby so I can sleep etc and (b) if he's sleep deprived is he going to stay awake in a night class, never mind absorb anything new?

Is this pessimistic - did you continue with normal routine after the birth of your PFB?

rots Professor Pop - what a cool name! Thanks for posting link - I have had thyroid problems in the past so it'll be nice to have something else to worry about Though of course babies arrive following mother's polite cough and nothing more

skater very nice indeed re South Africa. But does this mean you have to name the babe Johannesburg?

Did you mean you found the dress on the Next website? I will take a look. Bro's getting married in Crimea 8 weeks before I'm due so I need a dress to wear for that. Can't be something easy, like Yorkshire, can it.

pony you please keep posting on controversial stuff and I will stop posting controversial stuff, for a while at least - deal? .

Oops sorry vag (eek)

skater personal experience, it'll be good for him to have one night out per week, esp if you can have one too - or once a fortnight or something if you both being out once a week is too much. But it will be mucho hard to start with.

He may need to miss a few classes, say for the first month. After that it will prob be good.

Can you work it so that on that night he brings you a takeaway, juggles some stuff at home or whatever before going out?

Personally I would go for it (especially if dropping out isn't too expensive) as baby is still quite some time away, and if he can plan on missing a few sessions you should be ok.

Right, I'm gonna go away and do some work.

rots - sorry was attempting humour - actually found article helpful and something for me to make sure they look out for.

Who knows if there is any truth in the idea that you give birth to a baby that is somehwere between the weight you were at birth and the weight your bloke was?

I haz fingers crossed you see

Skater You expressed my opinion better than I did.

As for evening classes... I can only go on my experience, but the evenings are actually the hardest part right at the start. Newborns seem to want to sleep all day, then come 5:30 pm they suddenly want to feed and cry non-stop for the next 5, 6, 8, or even 12 hours. MrP spent all his evenings either fetching stuff for me (water, food, clothes without vomit on them, a straighjacket, etc) or holding the foal so I could try to regain some sanity. But then as things progress the evenings get a lot better - they are fed, washed, and in bed asleep. I can now safely send MrP off to do whatever he wants after 7pm.

rots Gosh, not sure that I know many controversial topics but I'll give it a go.

• I don't think Brad Pitt is sexy.
• I like pink roses (but not red ones).
• Porridge cooked in the microwave is perfectly acceptable.

Will that do?

Oh god you're all getting in on the act, but I read Bessie's statement to mean that my views alone were repulsive and whatever else it was. The rest of you got off scot-free.

I was too busy fox-hunting and smoking at the time to respond. Soz.

Btw, I think the "unwelcoming" comment goes back to the xmas secret santa when Bessie asked to join a month after we announced it. By then it was too late, but she never forgave me for that.

Anyway, I must read the rest of this.

Skater Because jailbait will be the SAHP and we have this unrealistic ideal whereby life goes on, at this stage we plan that we'll both get an evening off a week (at least). As far as his brain absorbs things - I'm led to believe that men are genetically predisposed to being able to tune out babies screaming at 2am. The gits.

Evenings will be fine alone. I am not hearing any opinions that state otherwise, for my lovely SFF works two night shifts every eight days.

In all honesty, I am dreading the first time he goes on nights after the birth. It will be about 14-20 days after sprog arrives and suddenly I'll have me, baby and dog. Alone. In house. Alone. You can train dogs to babysit, right? I mean, Nana in Peter Pan managed it...

NB My MIL is actually ok, and a former NCT BF counsellor

vag I know you were joking

pony:

• I don't think Brad Pitt is sexy. - me neither
• I like pink roses (but not red ones) - I like red ones AND pink ones. And yellow ones. As long as they're fair trade, obviously.
• Porridge cooked in the microwave is perfectly acceptable. - Yes - and made with rice milk is much nicer than normal milk.

God damn it woman, we're agreeing. Something Is Wrong.

evenings My first properly alone was when LC was about 1 1/2 weeks old. I got into t'bath after putting him down into the moses basket and 2 minutes later he started screaming. I sobbed down the phone to ex, "I can't do this" kind of sobbing, and obviously got a "shut up you stupid woman you were born with breasts, weren't you" kind of reply (well he didn't ACTUALLY say those words, TBF). But I digress.

By 3 weeks I was back at work with a babe literally in arms, so it can't have been "that bad".

BUT I would still assume that the first month would be best if he can skip classes.

Also I was blessed with a very easy baby, and I know For A Fact that that's not because I'm a fab mum (and no, I didn't feed him - or me - gin). He was just one of those Really Easy Babies. You can't pre-judge that at all, so there's not real answer other than - give it a go if it's possible to pull out. And make sure he will pull out if you need him.

Readybrek, Weetabix and Baked beans all taste good cold (not had any of them for years though)

Jam must always be accompanied by a thick layer of butter

Celery is the food of Satan

I still watch/record Neighbours every day.

Butter is the food of satan - and to be clear, in this instance, the word 'butter' encompasses and fat based spreads including those made from vegetable fats.

Milk is also vile.

Cream I love tho.

If toast has butter on it it MUST be melted completely into the toast

All spreads must be distributed totally evenly and extend to a point of perfect alignment along the edge of the piece of bread

People with 'No Turning' signs in their driveways are just being mean for no reason

Agree with pony ref Butter on toast except where butter is accompanied by jam, in which case the toast should be left to cool, to allow for a solid base of butter on which the jam can rest.

iggy's loathing of milk and butter is wrong the opposite to my own preference. I love milk and butter, but am very fussy an will not touch most types of cream. Sour and fraiche excluded. And the cornish stuff you get at Christmas

Driveways: Feckers used to turn in ours (right next to actual designated turning point) and spread the red chips all over road, ruining pristine driveway. Owners of concrete drives with such signs are cretins. If chips are involved, an exception must be made.

Keira Knightley's head is too big for her body.

casper You see why this is useful - now I can finally comprehend why some people might have no turning signs. I never understood this distinction before. I will now look out for it and distribute my disdain more appropriately.

Agree vv strongly with Keira Knightley head too big. And how could anyone possibly think she could play Elizabeth Bennet? (On related but unrelated matter, MrP swears he saw KK on the walking path through the woods near our place - totally middle of nowhere. He swears it was her.)

ponypants I agree - melted butter on toast is nice. But if it isn't melted I can't eat it - hence almost obessive buttering of toast as soon as out of toaster so toast doesn't get cold...

casp you are very niche in your cream preferences which is abhorent differnt to my opinion. All cream is good cream.

People that use food stuffs during sex are odd tho

cas I couldn't disagree more. If someone puts red chips on his or her driveway without some kind of system to stop them spreading, they deserve everything they get.

I can't believe what you're all saying about butter although I suspect that iggy's slim figure has something to do with her dislike us such things .

pony were you OCD about toast before the foal, or did the "triangles, NO, squares! You did it WRONG!" thing that toddlers do drive you to it?

I had bagels with melted butter for breakfast, after muesli topped with fresh blueberries and low fat yoghurt. A bit embarassed about the blueberries, given the time of year, but I bought them simply coz I'm preggo and figured the baby was worth more than the planet. So - should we have high carbon-footprint products just to keep ourselves and our babies in anti-oxidants and vitamins, or should I wait until the summer comes and I can grow my own?

Clearly my "I'm going to work now" policy isn't being followed.

rots are you after something from me you have seen my pics - I am not slim... I has met the gorgeous Cas and she is tho

iggs in that case you've not put squirty cream where I have.

I saw Angelina Jolie in the airport last time we exported ourselves. She had an airline worker looking after Maddox.

If you are rich and famous is it ok to have other people looking after your kids?

(PS in my opinion - take them! Please! )

iggs I saw the front photo on your profile...