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Due March 2010 - just because I'm pregnant at Christmas doesn't mean I'm a taxi driver

964 replies

annamama · 02/12/2009 16:56

... new thread for oldies and newbies due in March! ...

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
designerbaby · 17/12/2009 12:25

Gah!

"While you're on mat leave" because I really bloody hate it when people use the wrong you're/your... Bloody preggy brain. All standards are rapidly going out of the window...

Sariska · 17/12/2009 12:37

Oooh, I suddenly feel a bit left out by no longer living in London although I do know lots of the places you are all mentioning (including, yes, Mortlake). But we have better snow in Hampshire. Unfortunately, what we don't seem to have - and I never thought I'd say this - is a better maternity service, at least as far as choice is concerned. I was not at all happy to discover, courtesy of MN, that the birthing centre where I am booked in has closed (temporarily, they say - but who knows?) due to staffing shortages. I'm seeing the midwife on Monday and will discuss my options then but am starting to lean towards attempting a homebirth as I don't want to go into hospital unless it's absolutely necessary. Am very undecided, though. Has anyone here had a homebirth before?

Before my first birth, although I went through the motions of considering what would happen should I be transferred from the birthing centre to the hospital, I was sure it would not actually happen. Of course it did - and at a very late stage, too. Obviously, there is no real difference between being at a birthing centre and being at home (apart from the worry about what the neighbours might hear ) and, if I was at home, I would actually be a lot closer to the hospital should a transfer be necessary - however, in my head, there is a difference and I can't work out what it is. Anyway, I suppose, the decision may not be mine to make if staffing levels are too low to support homebirths as well.

Arcadie - you are very industrious. I am seriously impressed. And camel costumes! I struggled hard enough with a mouse, which seems somehow as if it should be easier.

Did you get any shopping done, Manda? I've done some of mine but have written a grand total of zero Christmas cards, which is bothering me, particularly where elderly relatives are concerned (I kinda feel they should have one).

Beanzmum - just seen your post about MIL. It's a tricky one but I agree with DB. You are absolutely right to focus on you, DH and baby at first. You will be a new family and, IMO, you'll need time together, just the three of you, to learn about each other. How best you manage that - well, that's the Question. I was adamant that I wanted the first couple of weeks to be just about the three of us and, to that end, I didn't want anyone staying with us during that time. I'm glad we did it that way, partly because it was invaluable "bonding" time (if that doesn't sound too naff) and partly because I'm not sure I'd have got BFing established if I'd had to worry about houseguests coming across me half-dressed/tearful/covered in leakages/all three. After that time, I was actually quite glad of people coming to stay (for short periods of time) but all my visitors (mother, MIL, sister and a couple of friends) are helpful, non-interfering sorts.

If you are worried that your MIL (or anyone else, for that matter) might interfere with your way of doing things, then holding them at bay while you get yourselves vaguely settled might be helpful because you'll then be more confident at saying, "No, I'm doing it this way". You should also then have a clearer idea of what you'd actually like them to do (cook, clean, hold baby while you catch up on sleep etc).

Sorry - mammoth post!

annamama · 17/12/2009 12:38

DB, yes your clearly suffering from you're usually excellent brain (Im sure) being affected by pregnancy, it suck's does'nt it?

If I asked my DH what was wrong with this sentence, he would be like

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scarysarahandco · 17/12/2009 12:45

Hello everyone,

i am now officially on mat leave(well it starts on monday but i have finished work!!!!WOOHOO)

Had my HIP grant go into the bank yesterday(i posted it off 4 weeks ago- so dont loose all hope you will get it soon !!!!

MummyElk my dd will be 2 in feb and is also a biter- seems worse if she is teething- dont really have any advise we do sitting on the stair for 1 minute then get apology etc- she still bites minutes later though!!!! but my sympathies are with you it bloody hurts!!!!!

DS has gone to school today for his xmas party and took his 'pots of gold' we made for his teachers in too!!! (they are little bowls filled with ferrerro Rocher, werthers original, a giant Thorntons gold wrapped truffle and a christmas scratch card wrapped in ferstive cellophane and i must say they look pretty good!!! he was so proud when he handed them to his teachers!!!!

have a great trip AFRIBABY

hi to everyone else!!!!

annamama · 17/12/2009 12:54

Beanzmum - put your foot down, that's way too long if she's staying with you! My MIL wanted to come over for like a month when DD was newborn, I said no. This time she hasn't even asked. There is no hard feelings, DH just told her that I wouldn't even want my own mum around for that long! Which is true. A week is enough...

Tigress - yes of course this thread is mainly for pregnancy! But mine is a bit like watching paint dry at the moment and since I feel I "know" you all I can't help but mention other things, like my child... I hope it doesn't get too much!

(She's ok from falling over by the way, thanks for asking Manda & Smac!)

I actually wanted to chat more about her and compare her to other kids her age, just out of interest... but the April 2008 board hardly mentions any kids, they just talk about other things, including new pregnancies!

Anti-D was had yesterday, it hurt! But went away quickly and no lasting effects. It was at the birth centre, heard some screaming newborns, made it all seem a little bit more real.

Manda - I can't believe your wee was examined with help of an iPhone! Hope you eventually get sorted out, that seems like a real annoying lingering issue... Re the HIP thing, can't you just call your surgery and ask them to ask one of the midwifes or docs to sign the form and then you can pick it up?

I got my "fit to fly" letter from doctor, but had to pay 15 quid for it! Oh well since giving birth is free I won't complain too much.

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beanzmum · 17/12/2009 13:00

DB and Sariska - thank you for letting me know I'm not being ridiculous! fortunately we're in a (large) 1bdrm flat in London, so the option of my MIL even thinking of asking to stay with us was never going to come into the equation . I'm lucky in that my DH completely knows and understands that his mum can be hard work (he often finds her harder work than I do), and it was a mutual strategic decision to delay the move to a 2bdrm place until our current lease is up with bub will be c. 5mths old.

MIL has got that msg and we've encouraged her to look at hotel / B&B options within easy walking distance, and she seems Ok with this. Fortunately for me, my parents will be here first, and are much more level headed about the whole 1st grandchild experience. And my parents (esp. my dad) are pretty good at managing my MIL as well, so I'm hoping to have some added support!

Hopefully the MIL will be reasonable in her expectations and demands while she's here ... the suggestion of some T&Cs is a good one. I'm nervous that she'll want to spend so much time with the bub (& me, & DH by extension) that we'll feel we have to tell her to back off to let us have time with our friends & each other! We're definitely going to encourage her on the European travel - her sister lives in Switzerland, and will hopefully be happy to have a house guest for 4 - 6wks!

scary - so jealous that your last work day is today! I've got 'til January 8 ... can't wait!

beanzmum · 17/12/2009 13:07

annamama - glad to know it gets easier It wouldn't be an issue if we didn't live in the UK and her in Aus ...

I had to pay £15 for my 'fit to fly' letter from my GP too. And if the BA strike goes ahead I won't even need it 'cause we'll be on the train instead! (but that's a whole other grumble)

Sariska · 17/12/2009 13:17

Watching paint dry..... Heehee, I feel that way too sometimes, annamama. And I also find that having another child really does affect how I feel about this pregnancy - and cope with it, especially the tiredness and the fluctuating hormones. And worry about what lies ahead. .....although knowing that there is almost always a lot of truth in the "this too shall pass" mantra does help.

designerbaby · 17/12/2009 13:20

I do sympathise as well, Beanz... my in-laws arrives from SA yesterday for three weeks... .

We're in a temporary 2 bed flat, DD is in with us, they have strewn their copious luggage all over my carefully cleared and tidied flat, and I spent all day yesterday (from 6.30 am) cleaning and cooking and running around after them... [exhausted emoticon].

It's not helped by the fact that in SA they have 2 maids, a cleaner and a gardener; and someone who comes in to cook for them if they're having people over... Oh, and an extra maid when they have house guests. Just for the guests. So there are things which have to be done, which just don't even occur to them... That said, when we go and stay with them it's great!!

Oh, and DD has been traumatised by Father Christmas visiting nursery on Tuesday at their Christmas party...

Lots of crying at bed-time last night and "I no want Faver Cwismas to come in my room..." "I no like the man!" "He comin' down the chimmey into my room!" "I no like da BEARD,
Mummy..." "NOT NICE Faver Cwismas, GO 'WAY" etc.

She has an irrational (and unfathomable) fear of all men with beards, so I guess FC may well be the embodiment of all her worst fears, poor love - not only has he a GIANT beard but he's inclined towards breaking and entering and is apparently positively encouraged to creep into the bedrooms of small children in the dead of night...

She kind of has a point, no?

Even the prospect that he would bring her lots of presents didn't incline her to warm to the idea, so I ended up having to promise that FC WOULDN'T be allowed in our house this year and that Daddy wouldn't let him in. ...

db
xx

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 17/12/2009 13:23

Afternoon!

Annamama - thanks for the suggestion! Big sister t-shirt sourced and bought thanks to DH - we'll give it to her for Christmas, it should make her laugh!

SPM - 'dress her like a chav'!!! She isn't seem dead in anything remotely chav like - she refuses to wear the tracksuit bottoms which she has for some ballet work outside the studio! Sometimes, I despare ir . . .

Manda - sorry about that - I guess you've just lost your ready made live in nanny, then?!

Arcadie, how exactly do you write about how Jesus changed your life so that toddlers will understand?

Pacific - I'm glad the scan was OK - you're not allowed to treat yourself or your children, are you? I bet you're a nightmare when you have to see a GP!

Afribaby, that sounds incredible - I'm very jealous!

ScarySarah (is that still your Halloween name?) - Well done for making it to mat leave - I think you must be our first! Your DS's present sounds wonderful - mine break up today after their Christmas Party. They've been overexcited for about three weeks!

I'm so tired today - I'd forgotten what pregnancy tiredness is like - it's just a different feeling to normal tiredness!

We've got snow, although it's not settling - I'm quite jealous of snowy places at this time of year!

Shroomer · 17/12/2009 14:03

So many of you seem to have children! Sorry I can't contribute to that side of things - yet.

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 17/12/2009 14:16

Don't worry Shroomer - we don't mind what you talk to us about!

Caitni · 17/12/2009 14:44

oh ladies, apologising in advance for a me me me post...

I'm being a right moaner today. I'm actually off sick with a terrible cold...in fact worried it may be developing into flu (thank god I had the swine flu jab). I'm usually pretty good about dealing with colds but I feel like a man-flu sufferer with the amount of whinging I've done to my husband today. I think it's because bed is actually so uncomfortable - can't breathe, can't find a comfy position, but yet am on the couch unable to get comfy and eyes streaming so watching telly or browsing t'internet aren't good either. God, it's moan-tastic chez moi today!

Have just browsed the thread so will catch up properly later/tomorrow but Anna loved your comedy sentence (or should that be "you're comedy sentence") - made me .

And Beanz up to 4 months - woah! That's a third of the first year - waaaaaay too long imho (but glad to hear you've strategically kept the one bed place ).

And DB running around after in-laws since 6.30 . Hope they start to behave like able-bodied adults soon (or offer to treat you to a temporary cleaner/housekeeper )

Smac soft play centre sounds like a good idea. The one I went to had only pregnant women (and some dads to be) along with two tiny babies. As long as people can hear what you're saying as you go through your spiel and have space to have a wide range of nappies to try and buy then you're sorted!

Sarah major at your ML - roll on 5 Feb for me (feels like forever away!).

Right, off to moan to myself while sniffing and blowing my nose pathetically - bah!

scarysarahandco · 17/12/2009 15:52

get well soon caitni!!!!!

Pixie yes it is my halloween name- christmas suggestions!!!! gratfully recieved

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 17/12/2009 16:26

Right then. . .
snowflakesarahandco
snowsarahandco

I'll come back if I think of any more!

scarysarahandco · 17/12/2009 16:40

oooohhhhh thanks pixie, snowflake sarah it is!!!!! god what happened to my imagination?????heehee

thank you xxxx

designerbaby · 17/12/2009 16:40

Sarahandcohohoho
??

I'm working, really I am...
x

snowflakesarahandco · 17/12/2009 16:42

DB love it!!!!!!hohohohoho

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 17/12/2009 16:43

How do you manage to work and come up with better names than me, DB?

Tis not fair!

And, Sarah, feel free to change to DB's name!

designerbaby · 17/12/2009 17:31

I don't - on either count!
Notice how I've also totally failed to come up with anything amusingly festive for my own...

db
xx

p.s. Oh, and I probably ought to mention that part of my job is copywriting? [cheating emoticon]

MandaHugNKiss · 17/12/2009 17:49

Given I refuse to submit to the christmas spitit, shall I just namechange to scrooge? Or Grinch?

No. Wait. They both were won over in the end. That won't happen to me!

db be kind to yourself - just because you're short (your words! In the kingston/tooting thread ) it doesn't make you a pesky hobbitsy. Come to the dark side. We have cookies Oh, that's right; you are coming anyway

Who mentioned no festive biscuit yesterday? (I am replying SINGLE TABBED and my poor pregnancy drained memory will show itself in all its glory now). I now see a jammy dodger donning a santa hat. Which kinda disturbs me.

anna Your 'spot the deliberate mistake' sentence got a chuckle from me too. Bravo

Coh, caitni aren't you a moany one?! Feel better soon, that sounds bloody miserable and I'm not surprised you're voicing to anyone who will listen! What I find so hard to tolerate about getting cold/flu when pregnant is you can't take all the lovely symptom numbing heavy duty 'cold & flu' pills/sachets. Poor you

MandaHugNKiss · 17/12/2009 18:07

Spitit? Sounds distinctly nork-related...

Spirit*

designerbaby · 17/12/2009 18:21

Does anyone else look at the fbiscuit smile and think it looks like a giant boob with a hat on, and then wonder if their boobs are now sizable enough to balance a hat on yet?

Or is it just me

Anna, I've blanked you're message from my memory. It was too painful, and I was on the verge of having a seizure...

Manda - actually on the hobbit front - I'm originally from Norfolk, and if you'd seen my wedding pics (my short, slightly stumpy, Norfolk family vs. DH tall, muscular, slightly Germanic, bred on vast quantities of red meat South African family, it did somewhat resemble an interracial marriage twixt the Hobbits and the Riders of Rohan...

But anyway, I shan't dwell on it. And I won't be able to see my feet for much longer (as it is it takes a bit of effort) to worry that they may be sprouting hairs...

Caitni - moan away - I'm sure at least 50% of this thread is specifically set aside for whinging. At least I've been assuming it is...

Going home to see if my DD is STILL banging on about Father Christmas...

db
xx

snowflakesarahandco · 17/12/2009 20:26

DB i too see a giant boob with a hat on!!!very funny!!!!! and no the hat won't balance!!!!!

annamama · 17/12/2009 21:21

DB - I'm sorry I almost caused you a seizure, I'm sure you won't make any more silly errors from now on! Glad I made some others smile though. On the subject of pregnancy brain, I was in a shop the other day and wanted to get rid of some change from my purse, was trying to count up 28p, but found it almost impossible... a good minute or so later I finally succeeded (I think). Could your inlaws not have brought at least one maid from SA? And your poor DD, aww... thanks for the warning, we will be careful with any Santa contact.

Pixie - haha, hope your non-chav, non-teenage mother DD will find the t-shirt useful!

Caitni and others who are poorly - hope you get better soon! And I agree with Manda, not being able to take the flu/cold meds sucks. (I have a stash of american ones, they are like rocket fuel, was lusting after them when I had a bad cold...) I forget about BF now but surely it's less restricted what you can take?

Snowflakeandcohohoho - happy ML!

Manda - Haha, poor you but please only commit murder if you're sure you can get away with it, your kids need a mother who's not banged up in Holloway Prison! (I used to live really close to it, always felt sorry for the women in there, thinking that they must regret whatever they've done...)

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